CHAPTER SIXTY SIX
'We have 2 months to save this family. I brought her home, make sure she stays...''
He turned and looked at his son and couldn't believe what his children had done for him. They probably didn't understand how much they had actually done. They had given him a life line. They had given him an opportunity to actually save his marriage.
It finally sunk in that she was actually here, in his living room, in his house and she was to stay for 2 months.
'Raman ...'' Ishita called out
When he heard her voice all the emotions he had bottled up inside just came crumbling down and he couldn't take it. He needed an out, he needed breathe, he needed space he had to be alone and not let her see him like this and with that he walked out of the room.
'Papa where... Papa wait...'' Called Aditya as he tried to run after him but Romi held him back
'It is okay Adi, He will be back...'' Said Romi
Ishita looked at Raman as he walked out of the room and didn't say a thing. She figured he ought to be angry with her with the way their relationship had been for the last month. It was hard on him and everyone else.
She in fact if anything figured maybe if he was angry with her then it would have been easier for her to leave and not look back after the two months, but Oh how wrong she was. Tears filled her eyes her heart breaking as she watched him walk away and yet there was nothing she could do about it.
She looked at the rest of the family that were just standing there staring at her not knowing what to say in such situations. Aditya came to where she was and knelt down across her and said
'Mom please do not take that to heart. Papa is mad at me for not telling him that we were coming to get you. That's why he walked away. Once he cools off am sure he will be back and he is happy to see you, I am sure...''
'Haan Adi Bhaiya is right. Please Ishima don't be sad...'' Said Ruhi as she came forward and wiped Ishita's tears and it is in this moment that she realized that she was even crying.
She took her daughter's small hands in hers and kissed her them as if to comfort her that she was actually okay but even she was finding it difficult to hide this fact. Mihika, Jai and Abhimanyu so wanted to just do something just so at least the tension in the room would be reduced but even they didn't know what to say,
'Okay then, where are we to put our stuff...'' Said Mihika who just desperately wanted to get the hell away from that room
'Oh here I will show you...'' Said Ruhi as she escorted Mihika upstairs
'I do not think she really can stay upstairs...'' Said Abhimanyu
'Oh No I asked that they cleaned the guest room downstairs but it seems Simmi Auntie forgot. It is fine. I will take care of it just please wait...'' Said Aditya as he and Jai walked out of the room leaving Abhimanyu standing with Ishita
The Bhalla were so much in shock because none of them genuinely expected her to be right there in their living room at that time. Looking at her none of them prepared anything in terms of what to say to her or where to begin to apologize and just like Raman, they all just kind of stood there staring at her
Ishita all the while just kept on looking at the Bhallas in the room as they all just looked at her still not saying anything. She figured+ Aditya and Ruhi had not generally thought this through but then again she couldn't blame them because they were just kids
'Look I swear I was not even going to come but I did give him an immunity wish. I kind of can't say No to that, so just please tolerate me for just 8 weeks and I will be out of your hair...'' Said Ishita
'What No it is... It is really great to see you really...'' Said Romi looking at Ishita
'Well it doesn't feel like it at all...'' Said Abhimanyu mumbling under his breath
Mr. Bhalla looked at her and while everyone was talking, he was just staring at her. All he could picture how she looked in the hospital with all those machines hooked up on her and how she almost died, how they almost lost her over something that could have been avoided. All the emotions he was trying to keep inside and be strong all just came trembling down and somehow he found himself walking to where she was
Ishita watched Mr. Bhalla walk to her and didn't know what to expect, she wasn't even sure what he was going to do and she couldn't walk away to try and avoid the whole situation given she was in a wheel chair.
He stood in front of her for a second or two before he knelt down putting his arms around her and breaking down. He held her tight as he kept on saying
'I am so sorry Please forgive me, I am so very sorry. I should have known better, it was my job to know better...''
Even Abhimanyu who was usually took pride in holding back tears couldn't control them and just let them out. Mr. Bhalla was the kind of man who just hide all his emotions and kept everything inside and didn't where his heart on his sleeve. To see him like that was heart breaking and one would have to be a complete inhuman monster not to feel something after seeing that
Ishita broke down and put her arms around him holding him back as she said
'No it is so not your fault. It is fine, Please do not apologize to me. It is okay...''
'No it isn't. What happened to you was not okay.'' Said Mr. Bhalla as he let go of her embrace and looked at her
No it was not but it also was not your fault. I feel so guilty that you have to all this guilt. It was not your fault...'' Said Ishita tears filling her eyes
'I keep on telling him that but he won't listen...'' Said Romi
'I am so glad you're okay...'' He added as he bent down hugging Ishita as well
'I am glad that I am as well. Plus it is good to see you all calm and not pissed. Mihika said you are like a crazy dinosaurs when you get pissed'' Said Ishita trying to make the moment a bit light causing Romi to chuckle as he answered
'Yeah! Sorry about that. I was having a bad day...'' looking at Ishita as he smiled
'Oh Hey, I was beginning to think that nice smile of yours had disappeared...'' Said Ishita smiling back
'I really missed you...'' Said Romi hugging her one more time and she hugged him back she whispered in his ear
'Is Ammi okay...'' To which Romi nodded indicating no
Ishita let go of Romi and slowly rolled her wheel chair to where Santosh and Simmi were standing. When Simmi saw her approach she quickly turned and run out of the room heading straight up to hers.
Ishita knew that Simmi and her needed to find a way to get past whatever had happened because in all honesty she really didn't anything against Simmi. If anything she felt bad because they all were just victims of circumstances and none of them were to blame for it. She turned her attention on Santosh and when she got closer Santosh took a step backward every time.
She never really knew what to expect so when she saw Santosh standing there with a blank expression not saying a thing when she saw Santosh walk back she got nervous and figured maybe she was not really happy with seeing her there or maybe Santosh would have preferred for Ishita to be out of her house. They never really got to talk when they met at the hospital that one time and had not seen each other really until now. She came forward to where Santosh was standing and said
'Just two months Mam and I will leave your house. You may necessarily...'' Ishita tried to talk but Santosh interrupted her voice breaking as she said
'I am so sorry. I know this is never going to be enough and neither will it make up for what happened to you but I really do apologize. I don't know how to make it up to you, I wish there is something I could do or say then maybe you wouldn't feel like...''
She suddenly went quiet and let her tears flow down her face as she couldn't hide it anymore. Ishita as the one with a blank expression because Santosh was the strongest woman she knew, this was not a scene she was used to and quite frankly even Abhimanyu was taken a back
'I really didn't mean to... I was just worried that... Now you're in this state because of... I am so sorry. I don't know what else to tell you. I wish I could just... Please if you need me to leave this house I swear I will just do not punch him or my grandbabies. They are your children and you are their mother and you can't just... Please...'' She added folding her hands together as knelt down in front of Ishita
'What! No! Please, why would you think I want you to go anywhere...?'' Said Ishita genuinely surprised
I don't even know how to make it up to you although I am going to do everything in my power to make sure that I try just, Please Ishita don't leave these children they won't be able to take it. I will not be in your way I swear, you won't even notice that I am here I swear.''
Ishita looked at her mother in law and it finally hit her that maybe what she had in her head about how everyone must have been doing was not actually as it was. She never thought she would see the day Santosh Bhalla would plead for anyone much less a person like Ishita.
But as Ishita looked up and watched how Santosh fell apart tears rolling down her eyes looking like a broke version of the woman she knew then she finally realized, this family was much more messed up, maybe even more than she was.
'Ammi! No! It is okay and I don't hate you. I could never even if I wanted to. You are like a second mother to me and you had every right to scold me when you thought I wasn't doing something right. You were worried about your children I get it...'' Said Ishita tears filling her eyes as she looking at Santosh
'That doesn't justify anything, I had to do right by you but I failed you... I failed as a mother, a grandmother and a mother in law. Everything is my fault...'' Said Santosh
'No, this is Tarish and Parmeet's faults not yours. You are just a victim of circumstances and I wish there is something I could do so you do not feel so bad. I feel bad seeing you like this...'' Said Ishita as she grabbed Santosh's hand interlocking her fingers with Santosh's before she said
' I would never allow you to leave because this is your house too.Plus you're the only one in this house who can cook the rest are horrible so if you left, I would most definitely starve...'' which caused Santosh to smile a bit
'Abhimanyu can't even boil an egg...'' Ishita added
'Hey...'' Said Abhimanyu which caused Santosh to chuckle a bit before she looked at Ishita and threw her arms around her as she repeatedly cried
'I am sorry Ishu, I am so sorry...''
Abhimanyu watched as Ishita systematically diffused a very tense situation making an otherwise tense situation seem like it was a joke. She was really good at doing that sometimes Abhimanyu wished he had the kind of people skills that she did. Santosh was a mess and it was a sad thing to witnessing how that poor woman fell apart. Abhimanyu only wished Ishita would look at this and try and see that this whole divorce fiasco was a mistake and she had a family here as well.
They cried together for some time not giving a care in the world that there were people watching them at their most vulnerable moment. Aditya turned to Jai and said
'We are not letting her leave without a fight.''
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It had been a whole day since Raman had walked out of the Mansion and although unspoken everyone was worried as to where he might have gone or what he was doing. Everyone had desperately tried to Ishita's mind off the whole thing but even they were not sure it was working.
Raman was a mess and he never wanted Ishita to see him in that manner because he knew she wouldn't be happy with him and he was also pissed at her for leaving him to go through all this and not allowing him to take care of her. When he saw her that morning he was not in the right frame of mind and didn't quite know whether to jump with joy or be angry for making him through the kind of pain she made him go through.
When Aditya told him about the two months he felt a sense of relief take over him as he recognized that his son had given him a second chance, a life line to give purpose to his life once again. There was no way he was going to let her leave him without a fight. Pissed as he was, he just wanted to walk to her and hold her then it suddenly hit him
It was early in the morning and yet he was reeking of alcohol and to be fair he was a tad tipsy. He felt embarrassed that he was in that state. He didn't want her to see him in that state; he had to take care of himself first before even talking to her. So instead of dealing he walked out. He wanted to sober up first before he came back to talk to his wife a talk that would only work if he was sober.
Tears rolled down his face as he walked out filled with a mixture of emotions. He was elated that she was actually here and also yet angry that he couldn't stay sober and try and be ready for her.
He had had a bad morning as he knew she was being discharged today but he also knew that he wouldn't get to see her and it was all becoming a little too much so he took a glass or two maybe even three glasses of scotch plus a few bottles of beer which is something he was royally regretting as he drove into his drive way.
He had manage to sober up and was so excited and nervous at the same time because he understood that she was in a very vulnerable state emotionally and psychologically so she could have interpreted his walking out in a completely wrong and unjust way that it may just end up causing a bigger bridge between them than he wanted.
As he turned the door knob walking into the house, he could see Mihika and Abhimanyu seated in the living room having tea. His parents were seated on the other side of the room taking tea as well as his dad read newspapers.
'Where the hell have you been'' asked Mr. Bhalla but Raman just kept quiet
'Raman for a man who so desperately wanted his wife here you sure didn't act like you were happy that she is here...'' Said Santosh
Mihika and Abhimanyu just kept quiet and looked at him not saying a word because they unlike his parents knew what Raman must have been through and maybe his walking out may have been the right thing to do.
Sometimes a person has to take a step back and assess before dealing with a tricky and unpleasant situation. He put his car keys on the table and turned to Mihika asking
'Where is she''
'Upstairs in your room, we fixed the room downstairs but since we had already taken her upstairs she asked that she spend the night there. Since she was tired so we left her and figured we could change stuff tomorrow morning...'' Said Mihika
Raman looked at her and smiled a little holding her hand as if to thank her for what she had done. He then turned and headed upstairs before he heard Abhimanyu say
'Go easy on her... It hard for her too''
'I know...'' He answered before he finally walked upstairs
Ishita had asked to stay upstairs lying that she was tired but the truth is, she just wanted to see him. Angry as he might have been she wanted to see him, she wanted to just at least hear his voice even if he was to scream at her, she wanted to hear him call her name. Who would have thought that it would be something she would miss so much. She wanted to just see him and so she asked that she stays there in his room.
The door went open as he walked in and the lights were off but she could see his shadow which caused her heart to start pounding she could almost hear her heartbeat. She placed her hand on her chest trying to calm herself down as Raman placed the jacked on the chair closing the door before he walked and switched on the light.
He turned and there she was, sitting on the bed as she looked at him. He could tell that she was struggling to keep her emotion in check because of how hard she was grabbing on the duvet as tears she so desperately tried to hide rolled down her face. It was heart breaking to see and yet amazing because he could see that she still cared about him and loved him more than she was letting everyone believe.
He slowly came forward and sat beside her on the bed still not saying anything and even he just let his tears fall. This was the only room he would freely be a mess without worrying about anything or anyone judging him for breaking a part. He could feel her let out silent sobs as she tried to hide them.
He turned and looked at her as he tried to take her hand in his but she pulled away and turned away from him. If he didn't know better he would have thought she was angry at him but he knew that she was just avoiding looking at him because she knew she might give something away that she was not willing to give away just yet.
He again brought his hand and held hers passing his fingers through hers as he squeezed and it took a second before she responded squeezing his as well
'Can we just pause...'' Raman said in a broken voice which caused Ishita to look up at him almost as if wondering what he was saying
'Can we pause and forget all the bullshit of now or the last 4 weeks and just be...'' he said tears rolling down his eyes but Ishita instead looked away
'I just want to hold you; I just want to feel your heartbeat on my chest so that I know that you are actually here. I need for that to actually sink in, that you are actually here with me. I need for you to just let me hold you... Please...'' He said
Ishita turned and looked at him putting her hand on his lips before she pulled him in holding him like if she let go he would actually disappear. She pulled herself into him forgetting the discomfort she had in her knee and just held him tight because just like him, she needed this as well.
Raman put his arms around her feeling the warmth of her embrace as he held her just as tight. She let out silent sobs as she rested her head on the nape of his neck and he felt her breaths on his skin. He missed that feel and the emotions that came with it.
He let the events of the last couple of weeks sink in as he pulled her in understanding that he could have lost her, he could have lost the love of his life, she could have died, what would have happened to him. With every memory he pulled her in letting all the tears he had held back for so long just flow because here, in his room, in her arms, he was not Raman the man of the house, RBK the business guru, Raman the father, in her arms he was just plain Raman, HER RAMAN.
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CHAPTER 67- http://www.india-forums.com/forum_posts.asp?TID=4382552&TPN=6&#p123061998
Taarak Mehta Ka Ooltah Chashmah
Tum Se Tum Tak
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
