Collab FF: IPK 2.0-Doing it right#3, Ch23, p144

madmaxine thumbnail
Posted: 11 years ago
#1
Heylo folks. Welcome to thread # 3 of Doing it right! Please continue all further discussions and post new chapters here. See below for deets of the collaboration and chapters until now. Link to thread 1hereand thread 2 here.



Hello everyone!

Several writers from the IPK forum have decided to come together and write a brand new FF. There are more than 20 people on board and we will write 1 chapter each. Obviously, this is an experiment and we hope it will be a successful one. We've had a long discussion on genre, characters, consistency, tone etc and are going with a rom com and trying to stick to the original characters.

We have decided to call it-

IPK 2.0-Doingit right!

Because we believe we can! Do it right, we mean.😛

Here is the list of Authors who will contribute and the dates when they will update.

1). 13th Dec-Maxine-scroll down for Chapter 1

2). 17h Dec-Meera-clickherefor Chapter 2

3). 21st Dec-Rasgulla clickherefor Chapter 3

4). 25th Dec-BlueMystique clickherefor Chapter 4

5). 29th Dec- Expelliarmus clickherefor Chapter 5

6). 2nd Jan-Emma clickherefor chapter 6

7). 6th Jan-MsIPKKNDmanic clickherefor chapter 7

8). 10th Jan-Invisiblesmile clickherefor chapter 8

9). 14th Jan-Lazyleaves clickherefor chapter 9

10). 17th Jan-blahblah16 clickherefor chapter 10

11). 21st Jan-dreamyshadows clickherefor chapter 11

12). 25th Jan-Naach_basanti clickherefor chapter 12

13). 4th Feb-Hot.pink.heels click here for chapter 13

14). 7th feb-V323 click here for chapter 14

15). 18th Feb-Nikita88 click here for chapter 15

16). 22nd Feb-GirlofFire click here for chapter 16

17). 26th Feb-Dee click here for chapter 17

18). 6th March-Maxine click here for chapter 18

19). 12th March: Emma click here for chapter 19

20). 18th March: Lazyleaves click here for chapter 20

21). 24th March: Nikita click here for chapter 21

22). 30th March: Invisible Smile click here for chapter 22

23). 5th April: Vee click here for chapter 23

24). 11th April: Naach_Basanti

25). 17th April: Ananya

26). 23rd April: Hot.Pink.Heels

27). 29th April: Rasgulla-Final Chapter

28). 5th May-Expelliarmus-epilogue


Whew! Quite some list that, I know.😊

Please add the account secretsurprise for Pms. Vee (V323) has very kindly made a twitter account. Please follow @Collab_Story on Twitter for updates.

Enjoy!
-Collab authors

Edited: For thread 4, please click here. 



Edited by madmaxine - 10 years ago

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reflorated thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#2
YOLA!
Cannot believe its thread 3. Actually, I can. Can't lie, you know? What with all those amazing writers and you amazing readers, small things like thread 3 are bound to happen :P
like they say "badey badey stories mein aisi chhotti chhotti batein hoti rehti hai" :P
😆
I'm just kidding! *avoids chappals at lame joke*
 
anyway, thank you guys, thank you so much for AWL da louv and soap-orte :D
 
🤗
 
-Vee
Edited by V323 - 11 years ago
Nidsubh007 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#3
Congrats for thread 3! Waiting for today's update!!
-Emma.K- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#4
Thread 3!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🥳

I'm truly so pleased to see how this FF is turning out, and it's all thanks to the awesome writers on board. I couldn't be more proud to be a part of this! ⭐️
Waiting for the next update 😊Edited by -Emma.K- - 11 years ago
Omoraboti thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#5
I res'd before the chapter was posted .. So kind of feeling funny posting my comment here .. Lol .. 😆

So in short .. The wonderful terms I have learnt .. Tonsil tennis .. Canoodling .. Swapping spit ... What elsr girls? Bring it on! 😆Edited by Omoraboti - 11 years ago
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Posted: 11 years ago
#6
Banner Credit : Boyznaka
 
 
 
Doing it Right- Chapter 13

 

 

Khushi paid the auto rickshaw after haggling with him for five minutes. Payal had gotten out of the auto as soon as they'd reached Sheesh Mahal. She asked Khushi to pay the driver and ran inside. Khushi walked inside trying to look for Payal. She was shocked to find Payal and Akaash playing tonsil tennis with each other, thoroughly in the middle of the lawn.

Khushi was shell shocked. Her shy sister who would struggle to even look at people's faces while talking now had her tongue inside another man's mouth, a man she had met not long ago.

She exclaimed 'Arrey Devi Mayya.'
Shortly she heard someone swear from a distance 'What the!'

___________________________________________

 
 
Arnav had just returned home from the office after waiting for three hours, in hopes that Khushi would eventually show up. He had tried her number at least a million times in those three long hours but every time her phone had been switched off.

 

"How dare she stand me up like that? No one stands up Arnav Singh Raizada and gets away with it." He muttered to himself, ready to strangle Khushi's delicate neck.

 

Angrily, he stepped out of his SUV and turned towards the front door when he noticed a figure clad in bright orange from his peripheral vision. Turning his head he was shocked to see her. Khushi Kumari Gupta.

 

"What the…"

 

She whipped her head to the left, looking right at him, her eyes clouded with bewilderment and confusion.

 

He paused for a second, unsure if she was really there or if he was going crazy and beginning to see things, after all he was surrounded by nutcases ranging from his Di to Khushi. But then his irritation flooded back into his mind and he marched forward, ready to knock some sense into that infuriating girl.

 

"What the hell Khushi? You were supposed to come to the office three hours ago, why the hell are you standing in my lawn now?" He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her forward till they were standing nose to nose.

 

He noticed that her eyes were as round as those gotas she loved so much and her breath was coming in short spurts as if she was in shock.

 

Suddenly Arnav was worried. He doubted Khushi would be intimidated by his yelling so he wondered what had actually traumatized her like this?

 

"Khushi?" He spoke softly, loosening his hold. "Khushi…tum teekh ho?" (Are you okay?)

 

Finally seeming to registering his presence she opened her mouth and softly whispered, "Arnavji?!"

 

"Khushi! What is it? What happened?" He was becoming frantic right now. In the short time he'd known Khushi Kumari Gupta he had realized one thing and that was the fact that nothing, absolutely nothing, could render her speechless. Yet here she was, as still as a tree trunk.

 

"Woh..woh…" She stuttered and lifted a finger to point at something but before he could turn his head and see what had her so distressed he heard a shriek right behind him.

 

He turned around so fast he got a whiplash, coming face to face with none other than Anjali.

 

"Di?" Her shocked gaze rested on him and Khushi for a second before freezing somewhere past them.

 

Confused, he followed her gaze and witnessed a sight he never expected to see.

 

Not even five feet away from where he stood was Khushi's sister, Payal, and his docile, meek brother, Akash, with their faces glued together. "What. The. Fu**"

 

Akash and Payal were oblivious to the little audience they had attracted, too busy satiating their own needs.

 

Khushi was the first to break out of the cloud of trauma that hovered over them. "Hayye Devi Maiyya, I can't bear to watch my bholi bhali Jiji being canoodled like this, right in front of me. Don't worry Jiji, I'll save you!"

 

Arnav watched in confused awe as she pulled her sparkly orange dupatta away from her neck and tied it around her waist before bravely stomping forward, looking as if she was headed off to fight in the British Indian War.

 

***

 

Akash and Payal were still at it when Khushi marched over and wrenched them apart, throwing her sister behind her and turning to face Akash.

 

"How dare you? Aap ki himmat kaise hua hamare Jiji ko haath lagane ki?" (How dare you touch my sister?) She scolded, wagging an angry finger in front of his nose.

 

"Mein…woh..uhh.." Akash stuttered nervously, suddenly frightened by the tiny girl spitting fire at him through her eyes.

 

Luckily Payal intervened. "Khushi, he didn't do anything, woh I…" But Khushi interrupted. "Don't worry Jiji, I know it's not your fault. I'm sure this man initiated everything." She continued to shoot daggers at Akash. "After all, he is that Laad Governor's brother."

 

"Excuse me?!" Arnav barked. Khushi turned to see him closing in on her, his eyes shining with annoyance and…amusement?

 

"What's that supposed to mean Khushi?" He asked, arching one eyebrow mockingly.

 

Khushi felt a shiver of desire but tamped it down. "It means that your brother is as much of a brute as you are, trying to have his way with my Jiji." She proclaimed haughtily.

 

Arnav's smirk was one of diabolical enjoyment. "So you mean to say all those times we 'canoodled' it was forced on you?"

 

Khushi felt heat dance up her neck and cheeks. "No..woh.."

 

But Arnav didn't let her finish. "Last I remember, Khushi, you actually enjoyed it." He murmured, taking a step towards her, in turn making her take a step back.

 

"Nahi!" (No!) She denied, suddenly nervous by the devilish glint in his eyes.

 

"No?" He asked, still moving towards her. Before she could take another step away, Arnav moved abruptly, effectively trapping her in his arms. "Are you sure about that sweetheart?" He breathed into her ear.

 

But before Khushi could come up with something to say, she felt a hand pull her away and out of Arnav's arms.

 

"It's bad enough I had to see one brother swapping spit in the middle of the lawn, I don't need to see anything more to be plagued with nightmares tonight." Anjali shuddered in disgust. "So will one of you please tell me what exactly is happening here?" She demanded.

 

"Di..woh.." Akash started stuttering out when Payal stepped up beside him and took his hand. "Anjali ji, Akash and I love each other." She stated simply, earning a surprised gasp from Khushi and an excited squeal from Anjali.

 

"Jiji tum theek ho na? Hayye Devi Maiyya!" (Are you ok?) Khushi rushed to Payal, touching her cheeks and forehead while Payal tried to swat her away.

 

"Oh my god, I never thought I'd see the day when both my brothers would be in love!" Anjali shrieked.

 

"Both Di?" Arnav asked, looking at her as if she'd grown a second head.

 

Anjali sighed in exasperation. "Of course you won't make this easy Chote." She huffed with a roll of her eyes. "Fine, I'll work on Akash first." She murmured to herself, before turning to the new couple with a big smile. "Ok then it's decided, Akash and Payal's rishta will be fixed." She exclaimed with a happy grin.

 

"Kyaa?!" (What?!) Khushi's head was spinning by the sudden turn of events. She couldn't keep up. First her Jiji's rishta is fixed with that drab Ahem ji and along with them, her own rishta was announced with that momma's boy, Jigar ji, then her demure and proper Jiji drags her to Sheesh Mahal to stick her tongue in another man's mouth and now all of a sudden Jiji's wedding was being fixed..again? Hayye Devi Maiyya!

 

She watched with rounded eyes as Akash and Payal peeked up at each other and blushed softly.

 

Not being able to handle the confusion anymore, Khushi cleared her throat loudly, drawing four pair of eyes to her. "Woh..um..not to be a party pooper or anything but I think we shouldn't forget that Jiji's wedding has already been fixed?" The statement came out more as a question, leaving Akash and Anjali confused while the color drained from Payal's face.

 

"Ahem ji." Payal gasped in despair. "Hum toh bhool hi gaye." (I totally forgot.)

Akash turned to Payal. "What?"

"Actually, just today, my Amma and Buaji fixed my rishta to Ahem ji. But I don't want to marry him." Payal sniffled.

 

Anjali clucked. "We'll have to do something about that then." She stated, the wheels in her head already turning. Moving to Payal she grasped her hand reassuringly. "Don't worry Payal ji, I'll figure something out, after all Akash finally has a girlfriend. I can't let him lose that, right." She teased. "Go home with Khushi ji now and we'll figure out how to deal with this in the morning."

 

***

 

Bright sunlight filtered in through the open window of Gupta House, illuminating two figures in bed.

Payal snoozed away, dreaming of her Harry Potter ji and all the spells he would soon be casting on her. But Khushi was wide awake, her thoughts scurrying about while her emotions were bouncing back and forth. One minute she would blush furiously and the next moment she'd bristle in rage, all because of the Laad Governor's antics from the previous night when Payal was preoccupied bidding Akash goodbye.

 

Flustered and agitated, she couldn't remain still any longer. Hopping out of bed she made a beeline for the kitchen, opening and closing various cabinets, pulling ingredients and pots out.

A few minutes later Khushi was absently staring into the simmering pan full of oil where a perfectly shaped jalebi fried away, her thoughts still preoccupied.

*Ring* Chalo maiyyan ke bhavan bhavan.*Ring*

She never thought she'd be so grateful for a distraction.

 

"Hello?"

"Khushi ji! It's Anjali, how are you?"

"Namaste Anjali ji. I'm good."

"Actually Khushi ji, I had called to tell you that I have arranged for a party in Shantivan tomorrow and you and Payal ji have to come."

"Di, party? I thought you were supposed to be coming up with a plan for Jiji and Akash ji?"

"Haan Khushi ji, the plan is ready; all you have to do is get to the party tomorrow."

"Plan ke saath party ka kya lena dena?" (What does a party have to do with the plan?)

"Darasaal humne paatha kia ki Ahem ji ki mom, Kokila ji, is Mami ji's friend. So I invited the Sharma's to the party as well. Don't worry, baaki ka plan hum apko baad mein bathadenge. Just get to the party on time with Payal ji." (Actually, I found out that Ahem ji's mom, Kokila ji, is Mami ji's friend. So I invited the Sharma's to the party as well. Don't worry, I'll tell you about the plan later. Just get to the party on time with Payal ji.)

"Accha teekh hain, hum rak te hain." (Ok. Bye.)

 

Khushi hung up, looking at her phone with confusion. "Party kyu?" She wondered out loud.

Just then she heard a gasp right behind her. "Hai Re Nandkishore, party?!"

 

___________________________________________

 
As you all know Arisai was supposed to be writing this chapter but for some reason she wasn't around and to continue on time I had to totally wing this. But I hope it wasn't too bad.
All likes and feedback will be much appreciated :)
And a big thank you to Maxine and Vee for the helpful reviews!
- Pria
Edited by Hot.Pink.Heels - 11 years ago
reflorated thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#7
OKAY YAAY ME NEXT.
 
I totally suck at writing stuff, so lets see how I take it forward.
 
😆
 
 
Edited by V323 - 11 years ago
-Emma.K- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#8
RES 😊


-----------

Pria, this was so so good. What a fun update! And it flowed perfectly from the last one, well done.

I realllyyy LOVE Anjali in this story, she is absolutely hilarious! Her lines in this one were down right funny.
Payal and Akaash are...different. And I love it. Especially Payal, she's so daring and she actually talks rather than her quiet nature in the show, it's excellent.
And Arhi? Well they are Arhi, always the best. Poor guy was waiting for her at the office since 8? And I hope Khushi realizes that her sister is not as innocent as she thinks...:)

I am eagerly waiting for the next update, want to read about this party! It sounds very exciting.

Excellent job, it was so well-written Pria😊

And now waiting for V to take over, I know she will be awesome.
Edited by -Emma.K- - 11 years ago
RB81 thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#9
Congrats for the new thread..
Anarocksick thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#10
Res
------------------
Edit : Okay...so I haven't read any of your works...but I have to say that this was extremely well written! 
Absolutely loved the continuity and the flow of it.

Also... what a fun update it was! 
Again...loving the sort of relationship shared by the Raizada siblings. 

My fav line : "It's bad enough I had to see one brother swapping spit in the middle of the lawn, I don't need to see anything more to be plagued with nightmares tonight." 😆

Great update. Cheers! 

Edited by blahblah16 - 11 years ago