Guide to Parenting by Shilpa Sharma MESSAGE pg37 - Page 20

Originally posted by: Senny

And May God always bless you with consistency Sabah, Amen.😳it's on my famous or should I say infamous wish list....i'm working towards it.😳
Sabah, I not only got inspired while reading this step but even laughed, I am amazed and in awe of the beautiful balance you create. It is an art and not everyone can acheive this feat, I am so glad you have and even proud of the way you so beautifully share it with us all.😳As I said before you say 'share' some find it quite intrusive; it is because of your vast and generous heart, butterfly.
Coming to step 8, I agree about the mother and her attribute of being consistently harmonious to different events or things in their child's life, no matter how bizarre they may be at times. When we leave home, it reminds us how much of a blessing our 'home' was in and amongst life's turbulence. Unfortunately many children do not appreciate this fact, always wishing for an 'escape' until it becomes too late to return. As they say 'you can never go back home' True, but you can built a new one upon its foundations.
Indeed this attribute is put to test at different occasions and Shilpa aunty not for once has failed or let anyone down, most importantly she has never let herself down. Like M in the beauty parlour earlier was one of the examples which showed how beautifully and gracefully she handled the matter.😃 To me Shilpa Aunty is Grace personified. As I mentioned before during my early period of self discovery and development, I only ever looked for kindred, ignoring the 'opposite attract' theorem, because, to be frank, I did not understand it beyond a fictional writing device. However due to personal experience, life has enlightened me to its real and true beauty. In my opposite, I find those traits that I lack, so a deep desire grows within me to be those traits, to be imbued by their beauty or least to be in their presence, therefore I also yearn to be near the vessel which holds those beautiful traits.

I am quite stilted, far from graceful as the two poles of this earth. Shilpa Aunty's grace in her words, manners, gait just hypnotize me. She is the most graceful person I have had the pleasure to witness.
Quoting you Sabah, I can never put this in better words than this:
"Lesson Eight By Mayank. Our ancestors used to say that 'Your parents are like the Sun and the Moon' you cannot afford to neglect them, for their very presence affects the push and pull of the tides upon the shores of your heart."👏
I know parents are the ones who builds up that inside person in us, but then this may not be the case with all the families and children, its the case with those children who have been very close to their parents, the general picture is and should be as so you say Sabah. True, I do understand that not all are blessed as Mayank. However the way I view it is that if you can't play the role of Mayank, then at least you may try to play the role of Shilpa Aunty, even if you are not a parent as such. For this world is full of child like adults, who desperately need the gentle guidance of Shilpa Aunty's parental wisdom.
But just as you have pointed out ahead "In today's rat race of society with parent's and children's timetables colliding...."everyone is just running and running after what I don't know maybe its the success which wouldn't even mean much in the long run, people generally end up neglecting their parents and missing out on the most beautiful guidelines in life.😭 I really do blame this society that we have created, taking responsiblity for it too as I am a member belonging to it. We must try 'one star fish at a time...'
On the other hand even some of the others, don't make a sincere effort to be more close to their children and on the contrary they feel earning money for their child and his or her future is important, but what kind of person is their child becoming is not much of a concern!Mou said a beautiful thing some posts back, about how we should not forget why we strive in this world. Sure your parents would appreciate your financial help, they feel pleasure in watching you achieve their dreams too, BUT ultimately it is your time they desire. Even just that daily phone call whose worth it worth more than seeing another sunset.
I realised I was swaying away hehe, 😆coming to the point, the two beautiful aspects you have put forth, the first being that the pull of the tides into the cruel and vast sea,

"I love the ironic movements that move through both these scenes. The actual opposing the literal. In Mayank's going away scene first Shilpa Aunty and Nupur being the 'actual' whereas in the returning scene Mayank unwittingly becomes the 'actual' opposing the incongruous literal. "Sabah I would need a little help with the interpretation of this phrase. What I have understood is that what happened in reality was opposite to what they thought? I guess I can touch on this again after you give me a lesson on this again.😳 Sorry, I didn't explain myself well, again I used vagueness to avoid patronization and unfortunately ended up with confusion.

Irony is one of those concepts that people commonly do not understand and thereby mislabel issues commonly. It is a difficult concept to appreciate, and I am no master either. I was deeply impressed by MJHT creators who infused these two scenes with irony, in their ambiance, tone, gist, words and movements. Irony is when the 'actual' is the opposite to the literal. Hopefully now my comments on the first scene's conversation will make more sense. Over which the MJHT creators effortlessly layer another tone of irony by making Shilpa Aunty and Nupur the punchline 'actual' over the words used in 'literal'. This is what raises MJHT above mere entertainment, its thoughtfulness in detail.

Then in the second scene, Mayank's literal words oppose him, thereby he becomes the 'actual' against the literal truth he professes. At first I thought it was as step 3, which contained truth trumping and pedantic versus semantics, but upon closer inspection I was overwhelmed by the ingenuity. Irony at its bizarre and sublime best. I have only ever witnessed correctly once before on Television, that was a decade ago. So to the MJHT I applaud you...👏👏👏Sabah your heart sank at him leaving the light which Shilpa Aunty shed on him😭 but then Sabah I was glad that M moved on as he should know the world around which has more to it than just his mother and studies. I am so glad that he did and N was one of the reasons he got to explore it. I am sure he might have later on without N as well but it would have not been earlier. 😃True, and the wonderful Shilpa Aunty, is almost pushing him out the door. She isn't crying her eyes out, beggin him to stay, like majority of mothers. Further, instead of wishing him a peaceful and safe journey, she prays for disruption and ensuing excitement! 😆 There really isn't another like our Shilpa Aunty. I really miss her...😭He was being temporarily deprived of one light that is of Shilpa aunty but then he was going to be interacting with another beautiful light that is the one radiating from Nupur. That light indeed was quite radiant to attract him to her so much!😳True, well said. 👏 As the light which radiated from the sun and moon are different so are the lights from Mayank's sun and moon. Each with its own purpose and each with its own enchantment.Now the next aspect, the push of tides towards home. This was one of the most beautifully enacted scenes, that was very well said, she right away got to know about the changed season👏. Master of chaos theory; P.I. of emotions. 😆Indeed the contrast in the thought processes of Shilpa aunty and Mayank was delineated beautifully! Shilpa aunty being his mother was way ahead than him and I guess even M was almost there but was just not ready to accept and this denial left him behind. Shilpa aunty just by looking at his face once and by hearing few stories understood everything and even knew what was in his son's heart. 😳Poor M just stood defenseless, as he couldn't fight with the truth and thus he was in the same position as you said like the helpless rocks which have to surrender to the waves.I love that 'little boy lost' look. Arjun emotes. It is so endearing, yet hysterically funny. I laugh with him and at him throughout! Hehe I agree one thing remained the same, his most favourite line. 😆Again the ingenuity of MJHt creators. 👏

God bless,😳 You too butterfly. Senny.

P.S: Sorry for the little distorted presentation.Hey, as elegant as any butterfly's path of flight!

Originally posted by: Divya_kaldivya

i m enjoying ur parenting guides Sabah...beautiful....

Originally posted by: SaJan_Sana4ever

You are too good...However not when I am bad😳
Im very very proud of you..Please all credit where it is due. For MJHT creators, cast and crew, we are all indebted, over and again👏👏👏
WOW....Indeed!
8th step...I know, there is so much wisdom to be found,
Aur woh bhi itni jaldiiiiThere is still far to go, and more to say, as time steadily slips away...

LoveSabah

Originally posted by: a little faith

Originally posted by: a little faith

Aww Sabah, it wasn't that elegant but your kind words make me look at it differently hehe. I am as always deeply humbled by your words and above all a beautiful heart with so much love and respect for all.When you have been around as long as me, you realise life is too short to taint days with ugliness.
I agree but a thought just came while I read about "Irony", when we are at home, we generally want to get out and do something which we deem constructive and better than staying at home nevertheless when we are outside, a part of the turbulent world, we want to go back to the comfort found in our homes. Its strange and it happens so often. 👏👏👏Beautiful observation. When we have one thing we want another and this vicious cycle continues. The what's next syndrome. We are so busy collecting flowers, that we don't take the time to smell, enjoy the bunch are a carrying around until when we are finally tired and sit down we find the bunch has withered upon us....That is why I don't save things until last. For example I start with dessert first. Seriously! I start and end with dessert. I have half, eat dinner then return to finish the pudding! I wear perfume to bed, so that I may breathe in the fragrance. I so agree about this constant emotion to escape but at times it may be not too late to return. Wow that was so beautifully said I agree even if everything comes to an end we can still survive and start from the scratch, make a new beginning. Wow amazing observation Sabah!The worst people do is despair. They give up before trying, in order that they don't have to fear failure, but don' they realise they have already failed.
I agree, Shipla Aunty is definitely grace personified and her personality is so charismatic that who ever meets her is left charmed by that woman. She is a simple woman with an extraordinary heart and persona. Again I loved the fact that they showed her to be an ordinary single working mother. No expensive jewellery, clothes, like mothers on other show, yet she out classes them all in her elegance and beauty. She works all day, not beautifying her body, yet is covered in a light no shops could ever sell you. She hasn't a husband, but the love of her son! She is grateful for love she once had, and still has in her life. She has never been pitied but I daresay people would want to be her! This is a remarkable feat. I applaud MJHT for showing us that beauty and wealth lies within us all and not in our possessions. I also initially never understood this concept of opposites attract, i would always question that why is that so, but your explanation there puts my queries to rest. I am glad someone agrees with me! 😃It took a long time for me to figure this out. However this reminds that there are many of life's mysteries waiting to be discovered. The mystery of the human soul, our penchants, desires, likes and loathes. It is so fascinating. I love this forum, it has opened up so many avenue for me. Compatibility between like people possibly grows faster but for opposites the compatibility comes with time but that is on another level as it comes with a tinge of flexibility where we learn to make room for differences and we learn to accept them.👏👏👏Again wonderful insight! Even people who are similar need to learn to adjust. Like two magnetic positives, pushing against the other.
One star fish at a time is the way to be, I have also never stayed behind in taking blame Sabah but the point is about how to mend things, how to bring the change we envision, as you referred to that Quote of Gandhi that we should be that change, I found it at times hard to apply in real life Sabah, a little push is what might make things more quicker, that push could be of anyone, even ourselves!Butterfly, you are the push. Sometimes we encourage goodness, spread light by going about our daily activities, being ourselves. Your kindness, goodness and tolerant nature has no doubt impacted many a person. Trust me, even a smile from a stranger on a long hard day, can rejuvenate and lift spirits above those dark and gray skies.
Wow that was beautifully pointed out by Mou, I know one of the biggest gift for the parents in todays era or any era is the time we spent with them, I guess better would be to say quality time but anytime possibly with them could be termed as quality time. Just sitting with them silently also would mean alot and to both not just the children or parents. Spending time with our loved ones and telling them that we are there with them is one of the most heartfelt gestures ever.Unfortunately we treat strangers better than our families, our loved ones and our parents who not only deserve it more but it is their RIGHT to expect it! I love that both Shilpa Aunty and Mayank reserve their best for each other. This was just so refreshing. Just in the manner they always greeted each other at the front door. That fact that when Shilpa Aunty so easily entered Mayank's room, no hesitation or knocking, just entering upon her son, who loved the attention! Unlike some children locking doors, especially those to their hearts, which were nurtured by those very same people in their youth!
Oh no Sabah, you explained it well, I just took a little more time to understand. That was so well said, i don't know what more to add but the beautiful part about irony is that it never fails to surprise us and it always keeps us on the edge, just when we feel, everything is in our control we realise it isn't so!I was truly overwhelmed by how much thought and detail MJHT creators have given to this show. I guess that is why it has touched me so deeply. Sometimes I think I am reading too much, seeing things that are not there, but in truth the beauty is apparent. I wrote about these details in SaJan scenes, which also prompted amazement, I hope Yasri won't mind me quoting her"I don't know is it becuase CVs were creative in these scenes?!!........or you are creative in your thoghts?!!!...........or I'm dump enough to not was able to see their love in this parallel way......." The truth is whether the creatives thought of it or not, (i believe that they did) or if it was an amalgamation, of cast and crew and many beautiful minds with sincere intentions, coming together to produce beautiful results, THAT beauty is real and it may be our choice to see it or ignore it but in a darkening plastic and shallow world, I say IT IS OUR DUTY, to notice this beauty, state it, let ourselves be drenched in its verdant light, imbued by its profundity and energize our wearied hearts! (sorry, for my emotional outpouring, that was the second of the day, I don't know has come over me...😳)
Shilpa aunty and Nupur both are very important for Mayank and their lights lit up his world and indeed make him what he is. Hehe I agree she pushes him to face disruptiion and imperfection, the latter is not something we face i guess but it just is a part of our being. No, we face it too, for don't we have to live with our imperfect actions, and subsequent consequences.
Arjun does emote beautifully and looks very adorable.Seriously in all Shilpa Aunty and Mayank scenes, I have to stop, and watch at least twice, first at Vaishnavi's refinement of expressions and then at Arjun's nuances in between. They are quite fine actors! 👏👏👏
Much love, I never expect anything less than this from you...😳Love sabah
Senny.

Originally posted by: a little faith

Hey Sabah,hey butterfly
That was so beautifully said, I loved it so much, i read each and every word more than twice to truly appreciate the meaning behind these words.👏Butterfly, you should not take my words so literally... In actuality things might be quite different 😉 Life teaches us the most important lessons, if we want to benefit we must listen. I believe nothing is coincidence or arbitrary. but I believe that God or What ever your belief's, nature, destiny etc, is on your side and showing you signs and ways towards a better tomorrow.
I do realise life is too short Sabah, I don't want to waste any moment feeling all sad and when I do I feel like i a part of me has died. 😭 But i guess coming out of that phase and out strong is important and we all do that!😃Yes but I also believe that darkness has benefit too, in that we are able to rest therein. Like the plants, we need to rest in the darkness of the night, continuous growth is if not impossible at least exhausting!
The Whats next syndrome,👏wow thats so right, its also related to another human trait, greed, like in your example, this person in order to collect all the flowers, forgets about the flowers already collected, by the time we come to the old ones, they ones have lost their fragnance.😭 No matter what it can't be brought back. 👏👏👏Butterfly, that was beautiful. Yes greed too! How does that saying go...'what does it profit a man if he gains the world but loses his heart and soul'
Aww wow you did, i have never put perfume before going to bed and given myself such a treat. I am a sweet tooth, I love the desserts so much, i always start with them.😳Same pinch!!! We have so much in common! Honestly i am not trying to insult you😳 Try the perfume, it helps me sleep with sweet thoughts of sweet dreams.
I agree and indeed one of the biggest punishments we could give ourselves is not giving a chance to get up and fight again. That was really well put! I find it strange that we should give up before even trying. If we don't try it is the same as trying and failing, we are in the same position EXCEPT with lifted spirits that we tried. In a world that doesn't even hope to try, this is a remarkable feat! how does that saying go...A life lived in fear is a life half lived
Shilpa Aunty is simplicity personified. For me a person looks the best in the simplest attire and with the simplest look. I am not against any kind of glamorous look, but I just feels that hides our real us, when we are simple we are just ourselves. Thats why Shilpa Aunty is sooo beautiful and indeed beyond beauty.😳 Indeed reaching her position is a remarkable feat! Its not so hard, it just requires having a big heart, clear mind and being focused.In the simplest of shalwar kameez, she radiates beauty that I know many spend fortunes trying to gain. I remember one of her last scene😭, as she left Bauiji, she glides out of their house, she gracefulness, I will never forget. I was mesmerized!
I agree, the best push for us is ourselves and I couldn't have put it in better words than you did.
Aww Sabah that is so true, we don't give the kind of love which is our families' right and yet we are kind to the strangers, is it because we are with them for a temporary period of time and with family almost all the time and thus we end up taking the latter for granted.😭Also i think we stop trying to impress our fmailies. That is why I love mayank, he is continuously trying to impress his mum and now Nupur. Most people once the wedding band it on, act as if they have nothing more to do to gain the continued love of their beloved. I am not saying that their beloved's expect it, but what I dislike is that they stop trying.

Quoting you "THAT beauty is real and it may be our choice to see it or ignore it but in a darkening plastic and shallow world, I say IT IS OUR DUTY, to notice this beauty, state it, let ourselves be drenched in its verdant light, imbued by its profundity and energize our wearied hearts! " 👏 👏 👏Wow i couldn't have said it better, as always i am learning and learning. I never knew it could be so much fun and wonderful.😳I am sure Yasri will be so touched that her words inspired you Sabah.I do the same and especially for all the MN scenes. My love of MJHT is rooted in the fact that it inspired me to be a better person and still does. When I slack, I watch an episode and it rejuvenates me. People always scoff at what they don't understand. All i can do is be a signpost, it is for people to decide the paths they take. However,whatever the season, the weather or tide, i will remain at my post. As you said, it is about sharing the light that others first shares with you.😳Much love always and always,returned in abundance!
Senny.
P.S: So sorry i took a little longer Sabah.Take your time, remember we don't want a rat race, we want slow and steady development. Did you know that in old Japanese culture they would gather to socialize, sit in room, in silence, listen to the wind, contemplate and ONLY speak when something illuminated them....that sounds truly like bliss!