Softness Behind The Power: Neelam Bose Roy (An Old Article from Shaaditimes.com)
Neelam Bose Roy, actress, mother of two, and wife to India's most popular television actor Ronit Roy really defines the belief: Softness is the force behind the power.
A tall lithesome willowy woman, her delicate demeanour in no way represents her strength of character, solid heart, and deep intellect. Shaaditimes caught up with Neelam in Mumbai recently to find out if motherhood, children and being Ronit's wife for five years has changed their lives and their love.
Ronit, for you all out of the Bollywood ghup shup, married the former model and television actress in a private and pious ceremony on December 25, 2003. Theirs wasn't a whirlwind romance as they had known each other for three years prior to their marriage and had courted with the dream to eventually marry one day.
Neelam With Ronit And Family
They have two daughters named Aadore and Agastya who Neelam tells us consume most of her time. ''My life revolves around my children and Ronit,'' says Neelam. She clarifies, ''I am still in love with my man, my marriage and my relationship. I believe we have weathered some ups and downs, and life has been hectic, but it's also been generally good,'' she laughs.
At first glance Neelam appears glamorous and model-like, but as the interview progresses she comes across as a down-to-earth, no nonsense type of woman that lifts the idea of wife, mother and lover to her husband to a status of ''domestic engineer''.
She shrugs off the suggestion, ''Yes, both Ronit and I are very disciplined individuals though we may come across as playful,'' she admits. ''We lead extremely hectic lives under the scrutiny of the media which can be enjoyable and difficult both at the same time,'' she says and adds, ''I am the one that looks after our private space, our alone time. We don't get much time to spend together so we don't ignore a word we speak.
We appreciate each other and fight also.'' She continues, "Our private life isn't the glamorous life that one would imagines from a Bollywood couple. I make him a quick breakfast, and if he spends a half hour with me I am thrilled to be able to share a meal together. At night we light a candle during dinner after I have put the children to bed and try to re-create the romance in our lives."
Neelam With Ronit
Is Ronit a good father? "Ronit is wonderful with the children. I believe he is the best human on earth."
And what does he have to say? "Neelam is the best woman, best mother, best person." Neelam gently reproaches him, "Its true. Flattery gets you everywhere."
What are the qualities she best admires in him? After mulling this for a while she declares without hesitation, "He's a good listener. Even nonsense things that I gibber off to him he listens to. And when I think he's really not listening he really is. I just wish we could spend more time with each other."
What is the chemistry they share? Can she describe it? Is it possible? According to Neelam, her upbringing has played an important role as is his. Neelam hails from an upper middle-class background. "We are three sisters, and we are an orthodox Gujarati family and the only advice my mother told me when I was younger was to find a career, whatever I wanted to do, but most importantly the most important decision of my life was to find a good man. And what she meant by that was not someone that was too monied, although money is important, but someone that would care and look after me and most importantly loves me more than I love him." She stops and then divulges, "Though I think as women, we tend to love our husbands unconditionally."
What if she heard murmurings of another woman especially since Ronit is devilishly handsome, and extremely charming? She pauses for a moment, "I hope and pray the same emotion should be inside me as I feel today. I am committed to my husband. My inner knowing says that day will not happen. Ronit will not disappoint me."
On a lighter note, what is the best day she has cherished with Ronit? "I think it was a holiday to Venice. We both were on the Gondola and Ronit started to serenade me with Hindi songs amidst the sonnets of the violinist."
She continues, "Each day we squeeze time to be together. When he's not filming we like to spend time with the children, having a quiet dinner, or just reading and holding hands. When he is filming I make it a point to send him a tiffin for his mid-day break each day. I instigate our off time. If I know he has a couple of days break coming up we plan to slip away even to Lonavala. I think we both need to rejuvenate."
Both Neelam and Ronit believe a healthy spirit starts with the body and they both workout at the Gym. "I believe it's important to workout and if Ronit is working out, I try to do the same. Our mantra is have healthy foods. We enjoy vegetables and pasta, also nice and spicy Maharastrian cuisine. We also try to pray together. He has a wonderful character and I think it's because of his strong belief in God," she says. Currently Ronit can be viewed on the Channel 9X as Bhishma in Balaja's epic Mahabharata.
Favourite restaurant
Spice at the Marriott.
Favourite bedroom line
Sleep well and sweet dreams.
Most memorable moment
The trip before we got married. We went to Goa. I had specially planned this for his birthday. It was a surprise and he had not clue. This is history because it happened almost six years earlier.
Challenges and triumph
His fan following. We love his fans. We need his fans.
On love
Ronit. Love is Ronit and my life is Ronit.
Lust
Definitely Ronit.
Greed
Something that doesn't excite me.
Jealousy
One of the emotions of humans. Though Ronit and I are not of that way. I have never wished I could have a body like someone etc... I admire people and think 'Wow! Fantastic!' but nothing with a bad thought.
Envy
Laugh it off
Edited by ammoos - 15 years ago
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