Aradhana - well done. I was worried that this one would appear forced or premature - but you managed to justify the scene with the sequence of the dialogues and build up of the scene. I really liked how you handled his understanding of her plight as a bandhua...and apology for not doing anything to help when she was young...this needed to be addressed before everything else and it was really the first injustice - he had ever dealt to her...even though it was indirect. Liked the way you wove in so many different components into the scene... the kiss challenge, paratha hari chutney, his drinking, his relationship with his father...the game they play to mask their feelings...so effortlessly.
Also the progression in visions - chidiya to young Chakor to the older one...and the reference to the chidiya dialogue..subtle but connected. Your style of pulling together a scene with so many subtle underpinnings is really fantastic...especially when the scene is flowing as seamlessly as yours does on the surface without feeling disjointed.
So again...well done!! š
I did feel more connected to Suraj's love than Chakor's...because the justification for it is more. And also noticed ... the sudden usage of English in the end ... with regard to Suraj's thoughts...the bed. That was sudden :)
Keep writing!
Edited by ipkrr - 9 years ago
Bollywood
