Friend falls in unrequited love with you--so you break the friendship?

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Binita

@...Binny...

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#21

Well said and I completely agree..

You have literally read my mind where Swara's reaction it concerned.. I understand her predicament what I fail to comprehend is how it was handled. I have no issue with her mission being her first priority because she has always been portrayed as a character who values relationships above all else hence her insistence on someone like Ragini still being her sister.. my biggest issue was that the confrontation left a bad taste in my mouth.. I expected frustration, and a bit of anger but it would have been far more realistic had she been given time to come to terms with his declaration of love and handled it accordingly.. he never demanded her affection simply stated a fact she should have put their friendship above this issue especially if she has forgiven his past sins and accepted him as someone worth trusting..

I'm willing to see this as a reaction out of frustration at not being able to handle the situation at the moment.. and the fear of losing a friend due to an emotion she no longer cares to deal with.. I'm hoping the writers show that intellectual understanding swara in the near future where her relationship with Sanskaar is concerned.. !!

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#22

Originally posted by: a_uma
good topic... 👏

On the face of it.. swara looks rather cruel and selfish.. rejecting the love of someone who has supported her unstintingly.. without asking anything in return.. she could have atleast let him down gently..

.. But our swara is a direct sort of character... not a girl to beat round the bush.. she had come to this house with a specific goal in mind.. to expose Rags ... and bring her parents back together..

She took the help of a willing participant - Sanskaar - who was in it for his own reasons.. they concocted a fake marriage and swara moved into Maheshwari house as sanky's "wife".. afterall he was a very good friend..safe guy.. . one who knew all about her.. comfortable as an old shoe.😆. part of the furniture.. 😉

But now with his love confession.. the whole arrangement is up in the air.. 😲 .. she is now aware of him as a person.. did anyone see the way she retreated while he advanced.. 😉 .. she can't handle this complication right now alongwith everything else.. hence the rant against him..

Hi Uma...thanks for the comment.

See, I agree she would feel frustrated, angry even. But my basic point is, she could have well ranted at this guy, who is her close friend, saying that she can never, ever feel that way about him. Ask him, why on earth he felt this way about her. Tell him that she has lost her faith in love and hence cannot reciprocate.

All this is well and fine. But to say: I don't want to be your friend anymore, was so OTT. From Swara, who always says relationships are key, who wants to forgive her psychotic murderous sister, and mission in life is to reunite her Mom with her spineless Dad, this lack of affection and regard for a friend, was shocking to say the least.

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muktha_cute

@muktha_cute

Dazzler

Posted: 9 years ago

#23

i dont understand what is fault of swara
obviously anyone will behave the same way swara did
she was in love with her bro once then all the saga hpnd and the situation now she is in how can she even think about love
that too with her ex bfs bro seriously
when u trust someone and believes them as ur friend and they come and propose u obviously u will feel cheated and that they had broken ur trust
that is exactly swara felt that is cheated and with all the hell going in her life i dont expect her to understand sanskar love feelings for her at this moment
she needs time even if her mom dad gets together,ragini truth will be out may be she will get normal and relaxed then.at that time she might think abt future,career,love etc but right at this moment anyone will go crazy

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tootiefrootie11

@tootiefrootie11

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#24

Originally posted by: Shanaia

Replies in bold:)

You all are saying Swara is "too good", "mahaan" etc etc.

Really, she is so "mahaan", then why didn't she pat Sanskaar on the shoulder and told him "she is disapponted but not angry?"

If she is so "mahaan", then why did she said that they would not be friends anymore?

We are not disagreeing- I don't think she is that way, I think this is at the TV writers' conundrum- they want to make a heroine appear that way, even if they didn't create her that way, they keep trying to gloss over her too much. I think she hasn't got the objectivity with Sansku to play mahaan and that to me, is a sign that he does affect her- she never needed to protest and over react as much as she did. Your suggestions of what she should have said were perfect- I just don't think she is in a state to apply ANY logic at this point.

Her mission to unite her parents has become her aim of life to a fault. And being this good, still loving her sister despite knowing her evil, still supporting her brother-in-law does not make her "MAHAAN"...

It describes her weakness...She loves her parents dearly...so she does not want anyone to distract her from her mission...not even Sanskaar.

I find the doggedness to get the parents together quite stupid but they have taken that from the beginning I guess (?) and they need to give her a justifiable excuse to keep staying at MM- I seriously don't get why she doesn't see her father doesn't deserve her mother, especially at the moment.

And that her biggest flaw...she forgives too easily...she gives second chances without hesitance and accept the apology even if its fake.

Yes, totally- she forgives too easily and a lot of people find that hard to believe people would do this but I can say from personal experience, if anyone says sorry to me, i want to believe them and i have also been burnt badly by this. Your right, this isn't a good trait to that extent, its a flaw.

Thats not being "mahhan" but being a "flawed " person.

Its her biggest weakness that she is so good and thats what makes her human.

Im not disagreeing that she is flawed, I think the writers like to make audiences believe heroines are and thats why characters behave "off" like you have just pointed out in this episode. For eg- the whole Adarsh situation, i totally agree, she shouldn't have let him off the hook that easily but the writers wanted to consolidate her new found respect in the house so they did that. See- if you overstretch things they break and thats unfortunately the issue with TV shows.

Edited by tootiefrootie11 - 9 years ago

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VintageWine

@VintageWine

Trailblazer

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#25

@ CogitoErgoSum & bips, you guys have summed it very well.

The pointers u mentioned are so spot on n very simple, you know at least for old times sake.

Its imp to maintain friendship... the guy has done a lot for u... it's not like karz uttarn are u r being obligated to him by maintaining the friendship.

I totally get it , one can snap n be cheesed off when a friend falls for you... put forth your views instead of this cold shoulder.

PS: She is gonna fall all head over heels very soon. 😆 eye locks , falling n all that regular shit 😆

I wish it would have been swara who fell for sank ... or would have been mutual at least ...

This is just going the swalak way... she behaved the same with Lakshy as well. *same old same old*

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#26

Originally posted by: ...Binny...
Well said and I completely agree..

You have literally read my mind where Swara's reaction it concerned.. I understand her predicament what I fail to comprehend is how it was handled. I have no issue with her mission being her first priority because she has always been portrayed as a character who values relationships above all else hence her insistence on someone like Ragini still being her sister.. my biggest issue was that the confrontation left a bad taste in my mouth.. I expected frustration, and a bit of anger but it would have been far more realistic had she been given time to come to terms with his declaration of love and handled it accordingly.. he never demanded her affection simply stated a fact she should have put their friendship above this issue especially if she has forgiven his past sins and accepted him as someone worth trusting..

I'm willing to see this as a reaction out of frustration at not being able to handle the situation at the moment.. and the fear of losing a friend due to an emotion she no longer cares to deal with.. I'm hoping the writers show that intellectual understanding swara in the near future where her relationship with Sanskaar is concerned.. !!

The parts in bold above literally read my mind on this. As you said, frustration, disbelief, anger...all that is fine. But why say: You are no more my friend. Seems extremely odd, considering she values relationships so much.

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Justlikethat1

@Justlikethat1

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#27

I would have been more surprised if Swara had not reacted the way she did today. Intentionally or not, the creatives of this show have hit the right note with Swara's characterization today.

I understand how rude it sounds, hearing Swara telling Sanskar he betrayed her.. but it is perfectly understandable given her history on this subject and I do not mean what Sanskar did to separate her and Laksh.

Swara has come out of a bad relationship, a relationship that started out as friendship and was a one-sided love from Laksh that changed to her falling in love with him and we know how that ended. She sees Ragini and what she sees is a one sided affair that is destroying many lives including her mother's and hers.

She is in a marriage that she knows is false and now she has the added knowledge that Sanskar has fallen in love with her. She is burdened by this and she is lashing out.

To her, the fact that Sanskar could even think of their relationship in this way is currently too much to take. Swara is intelligent enough to understand that somewhere she is the reason for Sanskar falling in love with her and she does not want that now. She cannot love him back, not now. And she was in this same situation before.. With Lakshya... We know how that turned her world upside down..

Maybe she will develop some feeling for Sanskaar later on, but currently, she is not in that place where she can confidently look at a person who she considers a friend and tell him that she does not love him.. And she thought Sanskaar was so different from Lakshya.. So no wonder she was wary and angry.

I like Sanskar's answer though. He told her that he cannot change the way he feels about her and will not apologize for falling for her.

When Swara gets time to breath sometime in the future, she can probably think back to this and understand the difference between the way Laksh reacted when he was in a similar situation and the way Sanskaar is handling it now. She will then probably understand that she has no reason to freak out.

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HARNEEN KAUR

@Har_cutedoll

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#28

Another thing came to my mind.Swara should have understood sanky's love because once even she had been in love with her bestfrnd laksh! Sanky didnt cheat you ACTUALLY swara. He never said that he wants to get engaged with someone else n then came to you saying that actually he loves YOU. Falling in love with a besfrind is quite normal n situations are not handled this way. Instead that one sided love is given a support of friendship so that he can move on if you are unable to love him back. If you deny this way breaks all ties then that person might lose hope in love forever. You might have broken friemdship if he ever would have tried to touch you forcibly. I agree she s too afraid to fall in love all over again but swara sanky never asked to do that. You are living with him as fake wife. He could have forced himself upon you n you would not have been able to say anything as you are pretending to be his wife. He never asked you to get married to him. Even now he s kidnaping lux ji to save you n ur mission.
Actually many a times CVs give compltly wrong dialogues to their characters. That was not at all good today 😭
Hope no one is annoyed with my so big big posts

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bips

@bips

Sparkler

+ 8

Posted: 9 years ago

#29

Originally posted by: Shanaia

Yaa may be she shouldn't have said that but look from her perspective...

She fell in love with a guy who was her best friend too...Now she doesn't want a repeat of it.

She is scared that she would get hurt again.She is scared that history would repeat itself and she is completely justified in her fears.

It shows that in her confusion, frustration and anger, she is not thinking straight.She is not making the right decision but thats what makes her a human.

Because humans make mistakes.And the poor girl has suffered so much.So now that she only expected trust and friendship from a person, he starts loving her.So in her opinion, he betrayed her.

It may be a flawed reason but its her reasoning none the less.And I fell in love with her more due to her rash decision because it showed that she is not perfect which make her perfect.

She, like Sanskaar, has her own imperfections wh

I would agree that this could be an excellent reason for her behaviour HAD they shown it.

As a viewer how can i figure out what the character is thinking unless you show it through actions or dialogues

Which dialogue conveyed that she is scared of history repeating itself ?

... And neither did her expressions.

She just looked royally pissed. I didn't see her look scared or confused ... she just looked inconvenienced - like dude we have a mission and dont waste my time with this nonsense

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Shona

@Shanaia

Inactive

Posted: 9 years ago

#30

Originally posted by: tootiefrootie11

Actually we are all frustrated because we want the old bubbly Swara back...

But she is going through so much that she has gone under many changes...she is not in the state to accept anything vastly different...and when she heard Sanskaar's confession, she blew her top off😆

Well, I think the writers want to have spicy tension between Sanskaar and Swara...and in the middle of this confession, they are going to bring marriage drama in...

So the y are just building up the spicy relation between them...no need to think more😆😆