Virat : The Blindfold of Fear, Guilt, & Everything in Between Updated - Page 10

Originally posted by: flybutter21

Brilliant 👏 I have no words am totally SPELLBOUND...👏❤️

Thanks for your time!

Means a lot when people read and respond.

Welcome to the forum 🤗

Very well written. And thought provoking as well.

Originally posted by: WittyKittyVixxy

Very well written. And thought provoking as well.

Thank you very much ❤

Thank you for responding with so much patience and clarity.

But I still have a different opinion on a few. Sorry for bugging 🙈. My responses in blue

"Virat thinks till recently Sai is not mature enough. Even in cafe meeting when Pakhi asks whether everything is right between him and Sai. He asks her not to compare samrakhi's relationship with his and Sai's and points out the Sai is bachchi. He thinks Sai is adamantly stuck on the vaada. "

I partially agree. He did in the beginning. And hence, had asked Sai to learn from Pakhi. But gradually he realised that Sai dooesn't need to be like Pakhi. She is good the way she is and way mature than he gave her credit for. How I see it is, "a guardian turned husband behaving like a parent". Our parents will always treat us like kids. Based on their convenience and argument, they use "mature" and "kids" tag for their children. That's what Virat started to do eventually. He was switching between guardian and spouse shoes based on the situation.

The only reason for this is that he wants Sai to accept him despite all this. He has to be her choice. He is adamant on that till the end. He doesnt want to say the magical words and obligate her. Thats what he tells Sunny in the hospital post AJ kand. It is underlying emotion that runs latently in their relationship that Virat wants Sai to confess to him. Because he is the one who set the conditions and because he is in love now, he cant make them null and void. It is not fair right? He cant have his way all the time.

This I had mentioned in quite a few posts and comments. Sai's love has to be her own realisation. Anyone forcing her into it will only make it as an indebtedness or sympathy. Hence, this had to be her journey. But there are two things that I wanted to highlight

1. Virat didn’t want to confess after AJ kaand because was under guilt. And hence didn’t want to force his love on her. And when things got better between them he tried to propose on their anniversary. Again it is situation based response/action from him.

2. When I said he should have told her they were that he accepted her as her wife. We still live in a society where love happens after marriage, and there are some where there is a marriage because it a society norm, love never happens. Because marriage is important, love may or may not happens, that is secondary. As long as they are able to live amicably together for the rest of their lives. Though I don't support this concept of a loveless marriage, what I want to arrive at is, while love is an integral part of a marriage, it is still a part and not a whole. They are separate and marriage has more components to it for survival. And that is where my view comes from. Love between the two was a grey area. But the marriage even when a deal was true to them in their individual space. They used to exercise that right consciously and unconsciously and always respected the chastity of it. Even when they the fate of their marriage seemed temporary they believed in honouring it till it lasted. But that was in their own personal space. When it came to showing or expressing they didn’t ..not consciously. Sai always held back, because she was in the dark. And that is where I feel he had to tell her that she is his wife and she has all the rights and that is how he functions. I'm not sure if I was able to express this point properly.

"This is what I said in the beginning. Virat gave too much leeway to her, only for one reason that she did not get the chance to move on. In cafe meet up, he mentions it again and again that he understands why she is stuck and pleads her to give Samrat another chance. After cafe kaand, I think he is cut off completely. Only after fake pregnancy, he will see to what extent she can go. This the reason I believe, Vankar will not skip this track. It is high point."

I have my doubts here wrt to Virat. He has seen Pakhi's degression. He goes hot and cold with her. When he is pissed with Sai, he gives her audience, otherwise if Sai is in some danger, he shuns her and keeps her away from Sai. His reaction to her work more on recency effect. So he will be upset with her and maintain distance. But that is not a long standing one.

Sorry for taking this up on loop again 😥

Will take a step back.

We are not just what we are born with. It is the effect and result, of various factors. Like the relationships in our life and the experiences we have. A part of it is ours, others borrowed. There are traumas of incidents that exist in our subconscious for years without our knowledge. And it deeply impacts our responses and actions again without our knowledge. It may be taxing but it is critical to shed the baggage and clear the remains for our own benefit. To remain true to our self.

Nagesh is someone we can only make assumptions around, but it is likely we will ever know. He was probably the first person Virat resonated with, admired and respected. Someone who left a mark on his impressionable mind. Probably the ones who gave his values, the foundation. But slowly the Chavan upbringing (in the absence of Nagesh) filtered down the characteristics. Because what we know of Chavans is that they are very superficial. They make big claims around principles and truth and what not, but fall short when it comes to actioning, clubbed with their regressive thinking.

So while Virat's foundation was intact, he wasn’t able to function freely around that framework. This is why people feel suffocated in certain environment. Virat's coping mechanism was escape, avoid and ignore. So while he functions primarily around the same foundation he does that more when he is free from from Chavan bondage. Outside the Chavan Niwas. Inside the house he just goes with the flow, without conflict. Now remember this as an experience along with a trauma that has stuck on to him.

KJ enters and Virat meets someone after a long time who is so aligned to his values. He idolises KJ because he embodies everything and more that Virat deems as right. And KJ practices and thrives on those values. There is no two versions to him when it comes to value system and execution. This is what draws Virat to him because he lacks the latter. That is what Sai's disconnect with him is too. While she sees glimpses of her father in him, he fails her when he needs to implement them. And this is where Ninad failed Virat too. The example you stated about Ninad not supporting Virat's decision to marry Sai.

Virat was never a leader, because he has always been unable to express or live on his own terms. When he stands up for something, he needs a support, whether for reference or for action. His values are not his, but borrowed by the virtue of action, the examples they set or gave ..Nagesh, KJ, Sai. Leaders may have idols or mentors and they learn from them, but eventually they own what they learn and make their own way. Virat is unable to carve a path.

Virat speaks to KJ only when it comes to Sai. One because he is that connecting common factor. Someone both idolise. Two, like I said there are two versions of V and the second one comes to fore for Sai and it is this version that resonates completely with KJ.

Thanks so much ❤️ Glad that it did connect with you all

Well said about the leader thing. Thats why i disagree about V being a "lion". Hes not the one to lead from front. He is fine to follow because he does have a conscience. So he knows right vs wrong. But Sai is the one who is the leader. She doesn't care what people think, she will stand up and say/do what she needs to even if she is called names. In reality leader is important but followers are also important. Because without the follower the leader is the sole "lunatic " in the eyes of the world. So its important for a leader to have a follower. That first follower is very crucial. In this show V is that first follower. He has am important role. But theres always gonna be a difference between having the guts to stand up , defy, speak up even when circumstances maybe against you versus being silent, letting go and watching and waiting for someone else to make the first move. Sai leads, V follows. No harm in that. Infact without that support Sai will be a lonely person. but V will always need a trigger to act, speak.. khud seh kuch nahi karpaata. The problem happens when he ignores wrongdoings or crap just because he is not on good terms with Sai. He always falyers in his judgement when he thinks Sai is wrong or he feels upset or angry at her. Then suddenly his moral/righteous/logic compass stops working completely.

Theres this really nice video on YouTube that explains this interesting concept of leader vs follower.

Sharing the link here.

https://youtu.be/fW8amMCVAJQ

V actually has a really crucial role in the show and story himself. But the story remains Sai's. And V's execution is completely all over the place. Either let down by acting, dialogues or direction.

Completely agree with you. And thanks for sharing the video, because it talks about the first follower that I was planning in my response. Makes it a lil easier.

Virat is like that 1st follower, who needs the guidance and can then lead on. These are the people who do possess certain qualities bit lack some crucial ones. Hence these people act as facilitators, mediums between the leader and team at times. And also fill in the absence of the leader. Virat for example, is someone who can keep the team together and avoid any conflict. He will delay or postpone the issue and maintain harmony bit the leader will need to step in to resolve the issue. He can be that right wing, but not the head.

Exactly and thats perfectly fine and reasonable. Thats his personality. But all I want is consistency from him. He cant stop doing the right thing when things between him and Sai are not hunky dory. Thats in fact the true test of his commitment, his righteousness. Will he recognize his boundaries, will he stop people from manipulating him and badmouthing Sai when he himself is upset/angry at her ?!