The simmering pain: Raglak STORY Note 11/3/16 - Page 7

Your doing a wonderful job...cant wait to see how lakhsya and Ragini work on their relationship

It had been past few min after L had gone...but time had stopped for her. Her heart mind was jumping with exhilaration. She felt so ecstatic. She knew it wasn't a dream. This was all real. L had called her his wife. He had come so near to her. Ragini felt like shouting from rooftop with happiness. She felt like flying...like doing what not...she wanted to run to swara and hug her and share her joy with happiness...her happiness was incomplete without her sister..who loved her to death...with shining eyes she turned to run to her with a huge smile and shine in her eyes...

Just as she turned to go to her she realised what she was doing. She stood rooted to spot. Swara...the sister who loved her to core,stood up for her every time only to be pushed back...by her. Ragini felt tears flowing helplessly. Was she actually missing her sister?. Did she still love swara??Didn't she hate her with a venegnace?.This was the most happiest moment of her life and she rem only her sister to share it with. Swara was the first name coming in her mind.Not her mom,not her dad,not her dadi..but swara. Ragini realised that even after all this swara was ethched in her heart and soul. She missed her sister. She was incomplete without her...

She felt a pain in her chest. How there fates we're entangled always...swara couldn't enjoy happiness coz of her...and now she felt empty, hollow,because of swara. She felt he OK w swara must be aching now..going through an heartache for an other time..and this time it would destroy her...break her so badly that she couldn't be repaired emotionally ever again. Ragini wanted to help her..go to her console her. She couldn't ever accept anyone else other than her to hurt swara. That right was only hers and kavita was bargibg in that territory. But she hadclost all those rights with her henious crimes. Ragini was once again su Dr prided at herself. Why was this old ragini surfacing again. Why the happiness of being accepted only momentary and lost now. She went to stand at exactly same place where L was standing few min ago...looking into the dark moonless sky..

This moonless sky was her...dark..totally dark...what was use of such a gloomy night when all it brought was depression,gloominess,creepyness,hollowness...she had to force and cut through the grey dark clouds now to give light and shine..she had to repair things which she could and ABC cept the punishment for things which couldn't be repaired...like gaining trust in laksh eyes. Finally she saw a ray of light appearing amidst dark clouds and little hint of moon started shining breaking the dark blanket...yesss...if moon can do it..so could she. The heart had finally won over the devious mind...or rather forced the mind to shut. She realised that lakshya had accepted her finally not because of love,but forcefully,taking pity on himself and herself..she had left him with no choice. He was tired...and this was not acceptable to her...

Ragini wasn't prepared with L actions today. After all dancing and happiness...she was back to earth. She didn't want her relation in pity. Suddenly she felt as if she didn't deserve his..rather anybody's love. Life of forced love is too short. From past few days..Ragini was feeling a,growing fight,a suppression in her. And now L sudden change of attitude towards her seemed pretty indigestible. May be like her he too was literally tired. This wasn't the life they had fathomed. May be he had thought to compromise coz she could rem clearly how many times he had told her that she wasn't worthy of anyone's love,that she wasn't human and that he could would never ever fall on love with a witch like her. Agreed from past few days he was acting very calm,silent and caring too sometimes. But this care couldn't be taken as love. He didn't love her...he had accepted her and this was the difference. Strangely for first time Ragini felt really guilt and disgusted with herself. Had she fallen so low in her mad ness that she got her right in pity...that her love her husband would accept her due to no other choice option.

A storm was building in her from few days. She felt so lonely. She dearly wanted someone who could I understand her,her situations,had the guts to stop her .Someone who valued her. Someone for whom she mattered...her smile, her wishes,her care mattered. Someone who could hear her pain and let her cry without taking advantage of her. Someone who would pull her out of this dark abyss..give her hope..a positivity...show her the real lost innocent ragini...somebody who wouldn't judge her for being simple,dreamy traditional girl who had no idea of the world and it's people. She was totally shattered. She felt insulted as a women. Hell hath no fury like a women scorned...and she had proved that...but what did it do...nothing to anybody...swara got an other love..someone who stands for her,L who still has feelings for her...her parents...all are living life as per there choice...and me..I was still burning. It was me who is most destructed coz of this fury. Only if ibhad real experience of world,of people. Now it's too late. I have lost everyone. My father ,who never stood for me or anyone..such a weakling.. My dadi ..I am more of a possession to her than a human...a way to feed her ego..she loved me but never let me grow..never guided me through the right...never let me get up and learn to stand for myself...I never had a mother but when I got one...she was too engrossed in other problems to even have time or right to stand for me or talk to me...poor mom..her most of time went to defend herself from dadi...when it should have been papa supporting her. Swara..her only fault was she was too different from me and she could never understand that. In doing good for me she never tlet me think about myself,never let me decide,gave me hopes,dreams,wishes... always stood up for me instead of letting me do that...keeping me sheltered...never understood the sensitivity of an issue... the tact to tackle it my way...and I..was the worst to let everyone do that to me...but not anymore. I won't be taken for granted now.and now on I will decide about my life...no one...not Eben lakshya. If loneliness is my life let it be...at least I want to leave head held high. I know am not worthy of anyone's love...and now I will not spoil L life either. May be this is my destiny.. never to be loved...never to be cared for...never good enough,beautiful enough for anyone...that is my only punishment. L I WILL SET U FREE ONCE MY WORK IS DONE. ...U WILL GET A GIRL WORTHY OF UR LOVE...SOMEONE WHO WILL BE LUCKY ENOUGH TO HAVE UR LOVE.

With a very heavy heart..she walked towards guest room with a confidence which she thought she had lost...but had gained now...she had to do the right...and now was the right time...ciz now no ones hatred affected her...so why not a final blow...

I hope like she said when her mission is complete she goes way from Laksh and makes him free, also leave the family as well.

Thank you for another super update x