SwaSan OS: Dyuta Parva/ Karna Parva Day 16. - Page 21

Originally posted by: bwvianna

Viji,
Beautifully written sequel.! The SwaSan scene in the beginning with Ragini's jealous thoughts, the SwaSan and Ragini confrontation, the arrival of a guest -Kaveri, Ragini-Kaveri first meeting, RP's reaction, RP-Kaveri confrontation, Sanskaar's emotional turmoil leading smoothly towards SwaSan passion filled romance. It was so well written and then I scrolled down for more and zilch.! I did not want to stop reading. That was some really intense and emotional update.! Really loved it.

Eagerly awaiting another update. :)

-V

P.S.: Happy New Year.! :)

Originally posted by: foresight

I begin the year with a story from you and Saku...what can i say, amazing start to the year! 🤗

Loved how you started this Parva.

Ragini still at her games and now SwaSan fighting her together and one team and not playing their own games. The subtle love and care in there relationship that you brought out was beautiful. This is what real relationships are all about.

You have portrayed Ragini well...unable to have her own happiness, jealous of the happiness she didnt wish for her sister who wins everything she wants, in a way. trying to hurt others for her pain, and failing miserably at it and then trying to hurt them harder.

i loved how they were doing detectivegiri together 😆. They mistook Kaveri to be referring to Ram earlier, but you kept the confusion alive wonderfully. Sanskar ended up being haunted by it, mistaking his father to have committed the mistake.

ohhh the family is teasing the love birds...nice add...though what was supposed to be a lie actually turned out truer that swara thought it to be 😳 😳. loved their sweet moment where he wasnt sure how to ask for the company and she understood it and gave it to him. it shows a wonderful level of understanding between them. i really liked that.

you know how we both think ram prasad is under utilised in the show. i loved how you showed him to the the strength that kept the family grounded.

i am looking forward to the next part already...why couldnt this have been in the show instead. both your Parva's for that matter.

i am so so happy you have kept Kavita off this by the way. I like how it focuses on SwaSan, Ragini to some extent and Ram...at least for now.

Originally posted by: luvakanksha

Perfect viji just perfect

I loved it keep it up

I always wanted ragini to be jealous like this by seeing Swasan

I fail to understand this sudden transformation of ragini's character overnight, she should have suffered then realised and then finally redemption, in the serial it seems rushed to me but your os is lovely

Swasan 😳 was so romantic and intensely passionate

Great great great work

I am not watching swaragini currently - i don't like this Kavita track

Just see the Swasan scenes and skip the rest

At one point of time I was so disappointed that I was not reading the os/ss/ff also but now atleast I am active on forum therefore sorry for late reply

Originally posted by: maaneetfan

Hiii Viji! Wish u a very very Happy New Year! ! Sorry ive really taken my time in reading the 2nd part and replying to it...Kids on holiday mode is 1 thing and school restarting is a different ball game altogether! !

Anyway coming now to Karna Parva (sorry i misnamed it in my earlier reply) ... needless to say u hv outdone yourself! Firstly i wanted to say tht u write so beautifully and reading ur ffs is like im in a book and the story just flows on its own...thr is no part tht is forced or out of place...each line is just right.

I loved the beginning establishing how well the rapport has developed btwn swara and sanskaar and how with each action of hers she proves her love and care fr sanskaar.

Smart intelligent and business conscious Sanskaar...how does someone with no business acumen whatsoever like Ragini stand a chance against him...tho in her foolhardiness she is trying her best...or rather i would say avengeful evilry.

I also liked how u hv tried to explain the transformation of ragini frm the sweet innocent to the evil witch and the possible reason fr tht tho i feel nothing justifies evilry so it would be just a matter of her choice of path.

RamPrasad!!! Again u bring him to the limelight and yes he is such an integral part of Sanskaar's life whatever Sanskaar felt in terms of agony n disillusionment i could completely relate to him. I feel tht even tho he looks upon Bade papa as a revered figure in his life his own father is his ideal fr all his values and in anticipating something clandestine with Kaveri his values and ideals seemed to be going down the drain with him. But the best part was when swara helped him talk out his feelings and he confessed tht he feared betraying her ... and swara gives the example of her own father's multiple betrayals to her mom and proving to sanskaar tht its not always like father like son ... what a sense of acceptance sanskaar would hv felt then...really viji u portray emotions so deeply one can actually feel the agony or ecstasy of each character!

And aah!!! The much awaited consummation scene...amazingly described. ... fully manages to convey the deep love of both Swara and sanskaar and whatever the final part will bring...m sure all will b well

N u hv given us hope with our quote...plus u cant let down our respect fr RamPrasad just yet...m sure the twist is round the corner!

Really loved this part and i don't knw how u manage it but m sure the final part will outdo all my expectations this time too!

Hope u r having a lovely vacation!

Love Tas

Originally posted by: Sakura24

Hi again Viji dear,

Since I wanted to discuss our mutual fascinations in a better long note I had delayed replying to this one, forgive me, I wanted to come home and find some free time to write a long reply here.

I had initially wanted Ragini redeemed too, as in the earlier days of the show Ragini had captured much of my attention, she was a character with so much potential...but as I saw that hope flatted I had turned towards seeing her as a cold, icy villain only to be disappointed again.

That's why I so enjoyed the Ragini you've portrayed here. She had stepped out of my dreams for her!

I enjoy the concept of gray shades too much, not that I admire evil, but the brainy and cunning villains sort of thrills me. So you can see how much I wanted Ragini to be much more dangerous than what she is in the show at the moment.

Coming to Mahabharat. Your thoughts I completely agree with. In fact I've seen so many touches of Mahabharat within the Maheshwari family, their entangled pasts, behaviors and relationships.

As you see Sanskar a combination of Karna, Arjuna and Sri Krishna, I see the same characters taking in turn to flash themselves out of him. It also has a certain string connected to the way they build up the inter-relationships of the characters.

As I have touched upon the winter series, Sanskar becomes Arjuna for Durga Prasad's Drona (Being the ideal son of a certain past), or Bhishma, he becomes Karna to Bhisma again (by Durga Prasad's certain choices that almost outcasts Sanskar) or at a time to Drona (I'm referring to his considerable partiality towards Lakshya here.) Then again Sanskar has a tiny fault on his side, of loving someone not accepted by his family and Durga Prasad being the lord Parshuram on the incident curses him in to utter destruction!

I have seen the Sri Krishna side of him mostly in the missions he involved for Swara, the planing, the wit and as you said the correct guidance he offered due to his perceptiveness certainly marks as a Krishna route to Swara's Arjuna role at that point.

As you have said, I've never envisioned Swara as Draupadi either. She is not that, but on some notes Subhara and Chitrangada can be paralleled with her. Going by the current one on the show, I guess Yudishtira's female version is also apt somewhere. Trying to do the greater good even at the cost of all one has...is that kind of a quality...good but utterly self traumatizing too.

Oh, had you read the frost knight completely when you posted this. You would have known how much I agree on Sanskar's pain, and his self fear with your portrayal. You know SQ has left him with some of the same insecurities...

you're right about the ending, it was needed, the most natural at the way things proceeded. And I did enjoy it a lot!

Originally posted by: tootiefrootie11

Res dearest Viji!

Happy New Year!!

Unres:

🤗 For this sis,

As we have discussed, desperately need sustenance in these "dark" times of the actual show. Co-incidentally I also just posted my part 3 update to the Restitution Series and also explored the Kaveri angle there, taking a different but somewhat similar track in terms of dealing with the paternity of one of the Maheshwari sons! Soul connect at play again?!

Coming to this excellent chapter, Karna Parva was as compelling as its predecessor part but in an entirely different way, which is always a delight to the reader. I have never been a huge "fan" of Karna in the MB, despite finding him fascinating. I agree that with Sanskaar there are some striking parallels that can be drawn for the parts of Karna's character that I do admire and thankfully the ones I don't, Sanskaar is free from in my opinion. By the latter I refer to the blind loyalty which isn't discerning enough to pull him back from grave wrong, evil even. But here, the parallel is masterfully drawn and works perfectly as it is linked to his potential paternity and to the more attractive traits, such as his steadfastness, his resolve and his grit in doing what needs to be done without seekinh sympathy or credit. A hero who doesn't demand the title. I may be spoiling the suspense but I get the feeling from the way this was constructed and your note at the end that the next part will help restore matters and Sanskaar's fear won't come true to hound him.

I liked the further development of Ragini's jealousy and spite as that flowed so well from Dyuta Parva. Also loved the business aspects detailed and set out logically and realistically, some thing that we just don't get in the mindless drama we are forced to watch!

What can I say about the SwaSan scenes?! The whole continued journey of Swara proving her love so effectively, just like Sanskaar did before is my dearest wish for the so this is soothing balm to me. The scene at the end l the way from that kiss to the love making which was the best healing for Sanskaar's hurt soul and psyche was magical and my New Year overall got improved reading this. Needless to say each of the descriptive elements especially in the gardening scene were superb.

Another wonderful offering, very gratefully received. I would have made this even longer but like you am on a leash due to already spending hours on reading and writing instead of spending time doing stuff and going out:). Love how we sit here hiding from families writing these on holiday! Love you and wishing for a wonderful 2016 for you and the family xoxo