Originally posted by: annika20
Sad to see altercation between some members here and odd to see a member taking everything personally or as some attack. Relax!
@Chitrashi
I am in two minds really. I have been so cold towards him for so many years that now I feel odd how to approach him!! 😕
TOPIC:
Well no one is promoting divorce here. But it's a fact that one should not be judged severely simply on basis of being divorced!! Coming to Aamir's personal life, it is said Reena still holds stakes in Aamir Khan Productions and also runs a big hotel in Mumbai.
I do not wish to dissect it all. But would just say that if two people have worked out things between each other, then who is society or extended family to comment?
Some like my uncle and aunt choose to completely move apart and close the previous marriage chapter completely. Some get divorced but continue to stay in touch either as friends or as business associates. It's really between individuals!!!
There was a time when I happened to live in a neighbourhood which seemed to have too many single/divorced/widowed women. Some stories of divorced women were absolutely ugly. Their former husbands had deserted them, not even provided sufficient alimony and refused to take care of kids! That is when things get nasty and person should be bashed. I know a talented, studious boy who despite getting good mark was unable to take admission at a good university simply because his mother did not earn enough to pay the expensive fees and his father had severed all ties with them after divorce and even his mother's relatives were not helping him!!😡
This is what you call neglect or deserting! This is something which should definitely be protested against.
I even know of a twisted family where they would keep kids taking turns! For 6 months the man would keep the son and his former wife would keep the daughter, for next 6 months they would exchange the kids! The kids would keep shuttling between two parents and I could see how the daughter was literally unwanted by her father and the guy seemed to want to keep the son with him than the daughter!🤢 I knew how weird it was for her and her brother, never been able to live together as siblings, and always having to shuttle between two homes!
These are things which I do oppose. So in case you have kids and later decide to take divorce at some point, then do take care of kids. Don't leave them to rot with either spouse or throw them at grandparents house or some boarding school. And don't deny to help them with their education and daily living expenses! Marriage might have broken, you fell out with spouse, but do not ignore responsibility for kids!!
In Aamir-Reena's case at least and thankfully, they both ensured that break up does not affect kids. I remember reading Shahid Kapur's interview in Brunch mag how he had to live at nana's house after both his parents remarried respectively after divorce and had kids with new spouses. He said it felt odd but he dealt with it.
And one point Shahid made in end was poignant and something we all need to learn from - he said people should let families and individuals deal with it themselves and not try to get a kick by gossiping or pretending to talk in ''concern''.
