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-Anku- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#21

Originally posted by: moniloveasya

if i m dillu then i defo forgive rashid but never agree to live with him even he is ill i prefer to visit him help him but i always end to my son who support me in my dark time
if i m asad then its really difficult situation for me but i really try to forgive my father just becase he is ill n my mother want this but i never live with him no matter what
if i m zoya then iprefer clise my mouth n not interfere in son mom n dad matter but i support my lve because in this situation no one is worng


I agree AS Dilshad even if I had to go tend to an ailing husband I wouldn't go the way Dilshad did, I would talk it out, discuss it over with my family and then take a decision.
-Anku- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#22

Originally posted by: VashH

Personally for me .. Would never be in such position as Dilshad ! .
So the present problems will not be an issue . There's no way I will I accept an unfaithful husband . That's it for me because I am not going to be second best in his life . The other woman tells me that you've found someone better than me and don't tell me otherwise . The children ?? This cannot be their punishment because it's between you and me and you have them wedged in the middle. . You may walk out on me but not on the kids without reasonable explanation to them . The truth has to be told to them and each other from day one .. Children don't need to go through life playing a guessing game when the end results are hurt and hate. . either you're accepted or rejected as a father there and then .. because if it has to be 17 yrs later both parents will be wrong and the damage is beyond repair for the child !


I agree, I understand where Dilshad comes from but I cannot relate to and ever agree to how she went about taking action on the decision she made. Leaving a son without an explanation, not discussing but TELLING him you're going, leaving him with no choice but to feel abandoned YET AGAIN, is what I would never do. I can understand why she ever wanted to go to an ailing Rashid, but how she did it is wrong in every way. You know how your kid has grown up and how scarred he is, why would you not be sensitive to him?

Love your POV 😃
-Anku- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#23

Originally posted by: Go4welkin

A nice post on a lazy Sunday morning!

Assumptions of my thoughts:

1. We don't know all details of Rashid, Dilshad and Shireen's love triangle, this makes it difficult to decide Dilshad's actions, therefore, my opinion is based on the impression that CVs gave us so far i.e., Rashid betrayed Dilshad not once but twice.

2. My opinions are based on the true nature of each character ( if I were in their position I would do things differently as I don't relate to any of the 3 characters)

Dilshad:

Dilshad stayed away from Rasid because he left her, she always welcomed Rashid with no grudges and open arms every time he want to come back. She let him comeback along with toddler Ayaan and again in the beginning episodes when Rashid expressed his interest to meet her, she convinced Asad and invited Rasid for dinner but Rashid didn't turn up due to his ill health. Dilshad's character always loved Rashid and always wanted him around, we all remember how Najma went to SM to invite them for her wedding to keep Dilshad's heart to invite Rashid. Based on her nature, I was not surprised her saying yes to Rasid who is going through rough health but she being a caring person she should have had convincing talk with Asad to tell her decision instead of telling him cold turkey. Also, she should have confirmed with Rashid that Shireen is well informed and comforted about Dilshad moving to SM. if Dilshad could convince a grown up Asad to not stop her from inviting Rashid to dinner, if she tried, Asad would have let her go to Rashid's place to keep her heart. Also, if Dilshad ensured to enter SM only after Rashid comforted Shireen that Shireen's place is unique in his heart and asked her to help him in reducing his guilt by allowing Dilshad to stay with them, Shireen being Shireen would have agreed and would have been less susceptible to Razia's instigation. Drama can be shown between Razia and Dilshad, they don't need to show Dilshad as insensitive to Shireen and vice versa.

Asad:

It is natural reaction to have urge to go far away when his mom leaves him for Rashid without proper explanation. It is also equally true to his character to blurt at Rashid and melt when his mom ask for help, even it means he has to stay in SM. Even in these circumstances he apologized to Zoya for being rude after Dilshad left and requested her to come along with him, this is sure character growth.

Zoya:

Zoya was surprisingly mature this time around by running behind Asad to stop him when she realized her mistake of arguing and abandoning him when he needed her the most. Zoya should just stay neutral with Dilshad and Asad as she don't know all the details. Zoya should have told to Dilshad that I don't know the background but if your heart desires I will not stop you or be mad at you. At the same time, Zoya should give support to Asad to stay back and not run away from problems. Again it doesn't mean she should shove Rashid down his throat. She should be his strength to face his demons but should not try to blindly influence him without knowing the details and his pain.






My thoughts exactly. As a wife, as a lover and as a woman and a mother Dilshad had a lot to take care of and she was divided in pieces, so although I do see where she comes from, her ways of going about the situation definitely makes me feel unhappy of the way she carried out her decision.

A) She should have spoken to Asad, explained her POV, convinced him she wasn't leaving him and going but rather going over to Rashid for a few days to ensure he was fine, because otherwise she'd keep feeling guilty of not performing a duty she wanted to.

B) She shouldn't have made him feel like a stranger to her life by shoving down her decision on him, she should have been sensitive to his feelings.

C) She should have spoken to Shireen before she went into that house. Although Shireen is knowingly or unknowingly responsible for her pains, Shireen is Rashids wife and she has all rights on him as well. Dilshad is entering her house so she should be sensitive of not making her feel like she is a no one in their lives.

Zoya was right in her intentions to stop Asad, even what she explained to him was sensible, but a few harsh words at a sensitive time like this could have broken Asad and probably did. He has been abandoned and she needs to realize that his insecurities need to be handled with care.

Asad is the victim here somehow, I don't think anyone of us would react to any such situation differently. But of course if I were in his place, although I WOULD do anything for my mother, it would take a great deal of force and thought for me to finally decide to stay at SM.

Thanks for posting 🤗 loved reading your POV
-Anku- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#24

Originally posted by: -Maliha-

@ BOLD: agree with the dillu's part you stated,, have not much issue with her,, in first place i had not done that,, buh if had done under the fear of loosing him fah ever, still had not pushed asad to do that,,
----
you can forgive someone you love to, buh can't push anybody else to do the same as he loves you, too,
he wouldn't let you down doesn't mean that you can push him to go on knees and bow you all the time,, as dillu wants asad to do exactly the same whatever she wants,, but never in her life she did the things what asad wanted her to do...
and thanx fah liking the story😳😳😳


I agree, Asad should NOT be forced to forgive Rashid. And neither should Dilshad also forgive Rashid. Maybe she is being nice to him because of his illness but she shouldn't be so giving that people walk over her and her kids.
sheilasandhu thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#25

Originally posted by: Drea_QH1fan

I'll keep it simple.

If I was Dilshad.


I would never go back to a man that left me alone so many years back. Left without an explanation as to why he's leaving. What could've been so important that it could force him to leave me and my children all alone to struggle in life? But if I were to take back that man. I would never go to live in the same house with him and his second wife and people that dislike me with a passion. Also... It doesn't matter if we're Muslim or not. He would have to divorce the other woman.

If I were Asad.

I would kick a fuss, yell, be stubborn, question and probably harm the man for wanting to take my mother away 😆. It doesnt work, then I would try to get away for sometimes just like he did. Because sometimes you just need to get away from it all and have sometime to yourself and think about things. If I dont "run away" from the problems and I do what my mom requested me to do. I would go see him but I would never stay in a house full of people that hate me and vice versa. I wouldnt cave into my mother's and significant other emotional blackmail. Things have to be taken one day at a time with baby steps. I would never be able to forget everything and I would not be able to forgive just because he's sick due to whatever. It doesn't happen like that.




I love you for this post Darling. You have just spoken what has been in my heart all along.👏👏👏
RosyRosh thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#26

Originally posted by: Ankita.M


My thoughts exactly. As a wife, as a lover and as a woman and a mother Dilshad had a lot to take care of and she was divided in pieces, so although I do see where she comes from, her ways of going about the situation definitely makes me feel unhappy of the way she carried out her decision.

A) She should have spoken to Asad, explained her POV, convinced him she wasn't leaving him and going but rather going over to Rashid for a few days to ensure he was fine, because otherwise she'd keep feeling guilty of not performing a duty she wanted to.

B) She shouldn't have made him feel like a stranger to her life by shoving down her decision on him, she should have been sensitive to his feelings.

C) She should have spoken to Shireen before she went into that house. Although Shireen is knowingly or unknowingly responsible for her pains, Shireen is Rashids wife and she has all rights on him as well. Dilshad is entering her house so she should be sensitive of not making her feel like she is a no one in their lives.

Zoya was right in her intentions to stop Asad, even what she explained to him was sensible, but a few harsh words at a sensitive time like this could have broken Asad and probably did. He has been abandoned and she needs to realize that his insecurities need to be handled with care.

Asad is the victim here somehow, I don't think anyone of us would react to any such situation differently. But of course if I were in his place, although I WOULD do anything for my mother, it would take a great deal of force and thought for me to finally decide to stay at SM.

Thanks for posting 🤗 loved reading your POV


^ Agree with this Ankita, but logic left this show a long time ago so im not surprised they made Dilshaads character take illogical and impulsive steps.. there needed to be a thoughtful process in her decision.. not an emotional desperate seeming one.
sheilasandhu thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#27

Originally posted by: surbhiholic

If i was Dilshad i wouldt go with Rashid and the rest wouldnt happen 😆


So right na sweety. He created the mess and she just added to it...😉😉
-Anku- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#28

Originally posted by: Drea_QH1fan

I'll keep it simple.

If I was Dilshad.


I would never go back to a man that left me alone so many years back. Left without an explanation as to why he's leaving. What could've been so important that it could force him to leave me and my children all alone to struggle in life? But if I were to take back that man. I would never go to live in the same house with him and his second wife and people that dislike me with a passion. Also... It doesn't matter if we're Muslim or not. He would have to divorce the other woman.

If I were Asad.

I would kick a fuss, yell, be stubborn, question and probably harm the man for wanting to take my mother away 😆. It doesnt work, then I would try to get away for sometimes just like he did. Because sometimes you just need to get away from it all and have sometime to yourself and think about things. If I dont "run away" from the problems and I do what my mom requested me to do. I would go see him but I would never stay in a house full of people that hate me and vice versa. I wouldnt cave into my mother's and significant other emotional blackmail. Things have to be taken one day at a time with baby steps. I would never be able to forget everything and I would not be able to forgive just because he's sick due to whatever. It doesn't happen like that.



@Your point regards Dilshad - AGREED I wouldn't ever go back to him too, never forgive him entirely either unless he has an extremely convincing and justified reason for it or has redeemed enough. I guess Dilshad has just gone over until he gets better. BUT the ways she has gone about doing that aren't what I would do either,

@Asad 👏 AGREED. Anything he does (EXCEPT forgiving his father) seems justified to me in this scenario TBH. But yeah Asad is like that, his mothers 'Guroor' like she says so him staying back at SM for her is no surprise for me.
-Anku- thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#29

Originally posted by: -Shayari-

I love this post first great job ankita.

I thinnk you never really know what ull do unless it happens to you and we can say we will do this and that but who knows unless we are really there.

Dispacing myself from my pov of an early.twnties girl who was born and raised in the states, who had a cultered upvringing but isnmodern in idealogies and who was blessed to have two wonderful parents but is not very close to the mother, more to my father...


If i were asad, from the perspective of his it would take me a long time before i visited my ailing dad who left me as a kid and my mother to fend for ourselves, cheated on my mom, and for 17 years was living with his second family. On my mothers instance if I was really close to her as asad is with his mom, i would go to meet him for her, but i would not stay un that house no matter what the emotional blackmailing. Because that would mean giving up to situations and in a way giving up in the fight of what was wrong and will always be wrong to me.

From rashids shoes, i guess i would do what he did, however if i genuinly loved my family it wouldnt take my 17 years and being ailingly sick and on my deathbed to reach out to the family. however that being said i heard its easier on human beings in general to mend wrongs when confronted with death because on hopes they will not be alive long ienough to bare the brunt of it. So who knows what id do.

From dilshaads shoes well as a woman who was decieved and cheated on 17 years ago and whose husband hadnt come back to me for that long and made me fend for our kids and build a life of our own, and who never stood up for me was to much of a coward to to do so, no i would not give in that self respect to go and live with my ailing husband all of a sudden. Because i would have divorced him 17 years ago itself and he no longer would have been my husband. That being said from a humane perspectice if he came to me i would tell him that im not longer your wife but out of my duty as a human being and as the mother to our children because that relatio ship remains, i will come to take care of you. And only to be there while your ill becauss i probably.wouldnt be able to say.no.to a dying mams last wishes. But no i would not pressure my son into doing the same. Emotional force to see the.man who stopped being a father figure 17 years ago, thats uncalled for. Id give him time and let him know that listen this is what he wants and im.doing to fulfill a duty as a once wife and human being, and id like if did it to for.someome who still comsiders you a son but you may not see him as a dad. No pressure. Its your call. And then give him time.


I LOVE what you said, Brilliantly written 👏

Just a point to add - As Rashid I wouldn't have the shame and the courage to look in Dilshad's eyes in the first place, asking her to come over to stay with me doesn't even come close to what I would ever be able to grab guts for.
sheilasandhu thumbnail
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Posted: 11 years ago
#30

Originally posted by: Ankita.M


I LOVE what you said, Brilliantly written 👏

Just a point to add - As Rashid I wouldn't have the shame and the courage to look in Dilshad's eyes in the first place, asking her to come over to stay with me doesn't even come close to what I would ever be able to grab guts for.


The only illogical part i read in all explanations is that why does Dilshad need to look after him.?? Aren't they enough people in that house already to do that?? Honestly what looking after is she doing??? She is not even allowed anywhere near him...😕😕

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