FF: War Path (Aslok fight it out)

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346815

Hibernated

Posted: 12 years ago

#101

WOW ! This was FAB !

SO great to read an FF where the grammar / language / vocabulary doesnt make me want to go jump into the nearest river .

Very nice usage of words , very articulate. Especially the bits about Shlok's conflicted state of mind & inner turmoil.

Looking forward to the next update =]

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janestone6

@janestone6

Navigator

Posted: 12 years ago

#102

Originally posted by: Marybarton
Hey, thank you so much for the complement. Great observation. I made Shlok's feelings known here because he's so secretive in the show. I want him to go through the whole gamut of feelings. On the other hand, I am sure my Astha will end up being stronger than the Astha they will portray in the soap. Enjoy!

Surely will!!

Oh of course they are going to show her a poor victim. Using zillions of tissues. 😆

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Marybarton

@Marybarton

Rocker

+ 8

Posted: 12 years ago

#103

lChapter 3:

Astha hid behind the curtain and waited. As soon as Shlok was about to pass by, she pulled him aside by his sleeve.

Shlok: What in the name of...Astha, kya kar rahi ho? (What are you doing?)

Astha: I need to speak to you before I leave.

Shlok sighed: Finally, bolo.

Astha: Huh? Finally, kya? Well, anyways, I need to know the truth once and for all. I don't understand this hot and cold behavior of yours. Do you want to marry me or not? I am about to become a member of your family, yet when I make a small suggestion about being nice to your Ayi, you snap at me! If it is not my business, then clearly you don't want me to become part of your family. If that is the case, why did you agree to marry me in the first place? I didn't even say yes until you said yes and...

Shlok looked on guiltily as she continued her monologue. He could not follow her speech, but he knew she had finally gotten the hint. Feelings are so confusing. Now he was feeling upset and disappointed.

Shlok interrupted her, softly: Do you want to marry me?

Astha, who was on a roll: Yes! Why would I agree, if I didn't?

Shlok's expression cooled and he looked at her adoringly, making her uneasy.

Astha: That's not the point...there! You are doing it again! This is confusing! You don't seem to like my company sometimes, other times you are all smiley and stuff...looking at me like that, you don't talk on the phone with me, you are snapping at me randomly... Yet, you were the one who always found excuses to get close. You did the pheres, you found excuses to touch me despite denying it, you pulled me into your arms and now that everyone saw it but...Shlok! Are you listening?

Ajju pulled aside the curtain: So, this is where you are! And we have been looking everywhere. You are not allowed to sneak off like this before the wedding! Come Astha, time to go home.

Shlok shook his head and turned to leave. He looked back at her one last time. Astha was confused. What just happened? She just poured her heart out and he said nothing!? How was she supposed to understand what all this means if he's so cagey all the time?

Astha: Ruk (wait) Ajju, mujhe important baat karni hai. (I need to talk about something important).

Ajju: Shaadi ke baad (after the wedding), now come, Ayi-Baba are waiting.

Astha followed, more confused now that when she started out.

Shlok dialed her mobile for the third time, only to cut it off before the first ring. No, this would not do. She will just have to marry him. That is what Baba wanted and he always fulfilled Baba's wishes. Besides, she needed to learn a lesson for being the complete and utter brat she was. What did she mean by embarrassing her father like that in front of everyone at the award function? She couldn't wait to talk to him later?

You gave her little choice that day.

Shlok silenced that nagging voice. No, he was determined to stick to the plan.

Taking a last swig of his drink, Shlok went to bed for a fretful night of sleep.

Next morning...

The house was abuzz with wedding preparations. While the ceremony itself was in a very famous hall, the house had to be decorated for the ghar-pravesh. Shlok looked around from the stairs. Everything was getting decked in white flowers. White roses, white orchids, white everything. He liked this. His Baba had considered his choice. Baba was always so considerate.

Anjali Agnihotri was on the phone in the living room when Shlok marched by to join his brother at breakfast.

Anjali: And those rajnigandhas (tuberoses) are not here yet Basuji.

Basu, the flower attendant: Yes, maam, those need to be fresh for Shlok sir's room, so we will send them in the evening.

Anjali: Haan, but...

Basu: No worries maam, my men will set up everything. Are you satisfied with the decorations so far? Aap jaisa chahte the waisa hi hai na?

Anjali sighed longingly: It's my youngest son's wedding Basuji, everything needs to be just as he likes it. Be sure to send your men on time then. Namaste.

Shlok turned away as his Ayi came by with his coffee. Then, remembering Astha's words, took the coffee silently.

Anjali almost went to brush Shlok's hair when her husband came in. She quickly stepped back to make way for him and went to the kitchen to get his tea.

Niranjan stroked Shlok's head: It's your big day Shlok. Feeling nervous?

Varad grinned to himself.

Shlok: I am fine, Baba.

Niranjan: Good. Tumhare sherwani aagaye hai. Try it on and see if anything needs to be fixed before the evening and give it to your Ayi, okay?

That evening...

Shlok took a deep breath as he put on his wedding attire. This is it. No going back from this. He sighed. Such conflicting thoughts were buzzing about in his head. Something told him this is not how he imagined it and he should be feeling bad for Swati.

Then again, everything was just as he might have imagined it. He was not really feeling any regrets about getting married to Astha, only guilt. Guilt that she had no idea that he planned all this. He wished this could be real without all the complications. He wished he did not have to bring it about the way he did. But Astha had rejected him, so what were the chances of this ever being authentic? This is how it had to be Shlok, she need to be blindfolded in.

But...I didn't want wedding with her blindfolded! How can you have a wedding blindfolded? Why can't I have a real wedding like everyone else?

Varad: There you are! Looking good for the guillotine little brother!

Shlok snorted: You have no idea.

Varad laughed: Oh, but I do! You clean up nice. Astha will be in for a shock.

Shlok: It's not for her. Baba wanted me to, so...

Varad, grimly: And you do everything Baba says, I know I know. Come, let's go.

This, but more Shloky 😆

Astha was getting emotional now. Ayi was already swiping tears when she thought Astha wasn't looking and her father looked like the weight of the world was on his shoulders. She was about to leave her house for the last time as just their daughter, thought Astha sadly. She wouldn't be Astha Kirloskar anymore. Wiping a tear from her eye, she checked her reflection in the mirror.

Gauri smiled wide, standing behind her: Mrs. Astha Shlok Agnihotri! Has a ring to it!

Astha's living room...

Ajju sighed: We are giving him the light of our life, hope he knows how lucky he is.

Gauri's mom: Of course Ajju, he knows how lucky he is to get our Astha bittya. Don't worry.

The other ladies also chimed in to cheer up the family.

Shlok was pacing in the hall. Astha was late.

Maybe she changed her mind, he thought.

Niranjan: Shlok, stop pacing baccha. Go stand by the entrance and welcome the guests. I will give Adbhootji a call.

Shlok: No, don't. (He stopped himself, he never said no to Baba). I mean, let's just wait.

A black car rolled by then. She was here, he realized with relief.

Shlok stared as she walked up like an ethereal dream. Her hair was pulled back in a small chignon, no bird's nest up there, thankfully. She wore a simple coral and silver jewelry set, nothing expensive, they could not afford it. But her dress...God, she was mesmerizing. He took a deep breath. Not even the most priceless jewels in the world could make a sight this beautiful.

She smiled at him, as if asking him what he thought. He blinked. His eyes were prickling. This was so stupid. Of course, they weren't tears!

Varad: That's quite a bride you are have acquired brother.

Shlok turned away. Astha's face fell.

Niranjanji came up and welcomed them all. Anjaliji also came up behind.

The ceremony took place without a hitch. Astha noted that Shlok behaved absolutely politely and did exactly what was expected on him despite not being of the religious bend. He even put the slight marathi chain around his forehead, just like her. It was kind of boring, he didn't say much of anything to her, Astha thought sadly.

Of course Astha! You are surrounded by like a thousand people, it's not like he will have a chat with you in front of everyone. You are the bride and groom in a religious ceremony for God's sake!

Her heart filled with joy when they were told to stand up for the pheres. Well, we have done that before!

Then, when he put the sindoor on her, she quickly checked her nose. Nothing. Oh well, she thought. At least it was a love marriage of some kind! Wasn't it? She smiled to herself, thinking that.

They finally had eye contact when he was about to put the mangalsutra around her neck. He looked down as soon as it happened. God, he was so handsome all clean-shaven! He had such beautiful, long lashes. His eyes were even more dark up close.

At the end, they took everyone's blessing.

Dinner was fairly quick and now it was really time to go. It seemed to happen so fast, thought Astha. She wanted to be with her family a little longer.

Thank God it is finally over. It's done. Congratulations Mr. Shlok Agnihotri. Mission accomplished.

Suresh: Congratulations sir, you are a married man now.

Shlok: Huh? Yes, guess I am.

With a start, he realized it was true. He looked at Astha beside him, starting to say her tearful goodbyes. She was his "wife" now.

What if...what if she wants more? No, he couldn't! He could marry for Baba, but he couldn't feign more love than he already had. He wasn't that sick, no.

That sinking feeling came back. Guilt bubbled more and more, taking him in.

She wouldn't ask. She as too clueless anyway, Shlok gathered.

But, for how long Shlok? This is marriage after all. And marriage was...

"Forever."

Shlok jumped out of his reverie: What?

Astha's Ayi: Hamesha ke liya apne ek lauti amanat tumhe saup rahe hai. You will treasure her, won't you?

Shlok: Ah, I ah...yes (he tried again), I mean, yes I will.

In tears, Adbhootji put Astha's hand in his. Shlok stared down at the slender wrist now hugged by green, glass bangles. A small mehendied hand, ornamented by the same coral-silver jewelry, held his palm trustingly. He was afraid he would crush her if he pressed a little too hard.

He checked her face. Trembling chin, tear-streaked cheeks, and those brimming hazel eyes floating in loss.

Oh my God. She was their little girl with hopes and dreams. What had he done?

Astha was sniffling next to him, distracting him from his own demons and the only thing keeping him from loosing it.

Shlok felt truly affected by the amount of tears she and her family shed that evening. It really made him feel awful, all the more because he wished he could give her something more sincere to cry over.

Shlok extended his handkerchief to her: Here. Um, don't cry.

Astha look the white cloth and wiped her runny mascara with it. Then, she blew hard in it and handed it back to him. He was about to ask her to keep it, but seeing her already sad face and wide, sorrowful eyes...he pocketed it.

Suhaag raat...

Astha looked around the room, forgetting her sadness for a moment. It was like a fairly land. Everything was white and the smell of flowers overpowered her senses. Everything was decorated with ranjigandhas, lillies, roses and what-not. Tons of candles were lit about the room too.

Astha: You had it painted!

Shlok: Yes.

Astha twirled around in the middle of the room: For me!?

Amid all the white, she looked like a single, red and metallic bloom. He swallowed hard.

Shlok nonchalant: I guess.

Astha stopped and sighed: I absolutely love it!

He opened the balcony's french windows and walked out.

She shly followed him.

Here they were, finally married. He was so sweet! He even painted his room for her. He might not say much, but that said a lot.

This was just like her dream. Except, there were no doves, she giggled to herself.

Dammit, why was she trailing him?

Shlok: You must be tired. Why don't you go and change?

Astha looked around in awe, even the balcony was decorated, everything including the rails were trailed with flower pots with delicate, viney blooms.

Astha absentmindedly: Hmm.

He inched away to the other end of the balcony and grabbed on to the railings.

Astha thought it weird. It was a little late for wedding jitters, no? Didn't husbands admire their wives on their wedding night? Wasn't he supposed to at least look at her and say she was beautiful? Of all times, he could at least try to say more than a few words now. It was just the two of them, on their suhaag raat.

Astha walked over and took his hand. When he didn't say anything, she took the courage to hug his arm just like she had dreamed of. Her toes curled with happiness. This was real. He was her husband now. Before she knew it, she was thrown back. Astha stumbled against the balcony door.

Shlok shouted: For God's sake, just stop it!!!!!!!

Astha looked stunned: What...did I do something wrong?

Shlok: Don't try to get close to me! You HEAR me!? Stay away! I married you because Baba wanted me to. Nothing more. So don't get any ideas into your head!

There was stunned silence. He did not know for how long she stayed quiet as he shook with fear, self-hatred, and anger.

Her chin wobbled: But...but you lo-love me.

It was time, Shlok thought. No more secrets.

Shlok: I DO NOT LOVE YOU. NEVER HAVE! I have only ever loved one girl in my life and that was Swati. (Pause, maybe he should have mentioned Swati). Don't you see!? I was only acting, Astha. Did I ever tell you that I loved you? Why would you get such ideas into your head!?

Astha felt like she was being physically ripped apart.

Astha in a small voice: You married me. You...(her chest was heaving with cries)...you gave me s...igns.

Shlok rolled his eyes: I cannot believe you can be this gullible! Signs!? What are you, a teenager? I cannot believe you didn't see through it, after all the chances I gave you. Dammit Astha, I even HOPED you would walk away last night.

She was staring at him dumbly. It was burning him inside to see her breaking right before his eyes. No, all blindfolds needed to fall now, this went way too far. She deserved to know.

Shlok was frustrated. She was STILL not picking up.

Shlok: Ohhh...Asthaaa, it was all part of my plan! I planned everything up to this wedding! Even that day, I locked you in my arms right by the window so your parents could see. How can you be so stupid? Did we ever have a relationship? No!

Astha quietly: ...All this...all just for Niran...

Something snapped in him.

Shlok: He is not JUST Niranjan Agnihotri. He's The Niranjan Agnihotri, MY FATHER. You REJECTED MY father's offer. Then, you even had the gall to attack his reputation repeatedly. Nobody challenges my father, you hear me!? Nobody! (He sighed. Gravely, he continued) Now, you have learned your lesson.

Astha fell down to the floor. Shlok was there within a second.

Shlok, concerned: Astha, Astha, are you okay?

Astha shrank back from his touch: You ruined my life...just to...just to prove a stupid point.

She suddenly made him feel really small. That wasn't all it was, but then...yes, it was. He had to admit it to himself. IT WAS JUST A STUPID POINT. He saw it now.

She stayed quiet for God knows how long, just glaring at the ground.

Astha, voice rising slowly: You mocked every tradition, my family, our values, my faith (her scream broke her voice) just to prove a point!? You had to get me tied for seven lifetimes to PROVE YOUR STUPID POINT WHEN I ALREADY EXPLAINED THAT YOU BROUGHT ALL THIS ON!!!??? WHY DID YOU HATE ME SO MUCH!? (She struck his outstretched hand) WHAT DID I EVER DO TO HURT YOU!?

Shlok guiltily: It. It wasn't like that.

Astha grabbed his collar, crying hysterically: Oh no!? How was it then!? You pretended to love me! You knew I was not experienced, you KNEW I couldn't know better. (She kept pushing and dragging his collar with all her might) YOU KNEW, YOU KNEW, YOU KNEW!!!

Of course she couldn't see the son's duty to his father, he was just a terrible person to her. Worst of all, Shlok was starting to believe it. He started to believe it as soon as the wedding was planned. It still hurt to see it realized in her beautiful, hazel eyes. He couldn't see the hate in her eyes.

Shlok tugged away her fists from him and walked out of the room.

She was choking him with alarm, crying like that. He had to get away.

Mrs. Anjali Agnihotri stared up at the balcony above hers. Astha's agonized cries floated down to her. She was hitting the floor of the balcony repeatedly. Ayi did not wait to find out what with.

She found him shaking against the bar, pouring himself a scotch with unsteady hands. The reflection against the mirrored wall showed him crying. Ayi whipped him around and landed a sound, crackling slap on his face.

Shlok was shocked.

Ayi: I wanted to be the parent who never put a scratch on her children. I wanted better for you. I did. I hoped you would grow up to be...but I was wrong. YOU ARE NO BETTER THAN...(she stopped herself). How could you sink so low after lecturing me that day? I AM TELLING YOU TODAY NEVER TO CALL ME YOUR MOTHER BECAUSE I AM ASHAMED OF YOU. ASHAMED! HOW COULD YOU RUIN HER LIFE JUST LIKE THAT? (To herself) As if coming to his family was not punishment enough. YOU ARE NO SON OF MINE!

Astha banged her hands against the floor despite all the tearing scratches. They pinched into her flesh. She must do this. This made her feel better! She laughed cruelly, quietly. She couldn't stop. She wouldn't.

4 something am...

When Shlok walked into the room, he found her faint in the balcony; still in her bridal wear, lying face down by all the shards of broken glass.

It raked his chest with sobs to see what she had done. All her suhagan bangles were broken into irreparable pieces around her. Her wrists had nicks and cuts down to her elbows.

Shlok slowly picked her up and carried her into the room. Lay her on the bed. Mechanically, he got the first aid kit, cleaned her wounds with extraordinary care, and applied ointment on them.

He put her down to sleep when she shook awake, half out of her mind.

When her breathing slowed into a steady pace, he made his way to the divan and put his head back.

5 am...

Astha got up and walked into the bath room.

Please comment and like. I haven't had a chance to make many edits, so it might be a little rushed sounding. Any suggestions are much appreciated.

Chapter 4: https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/post/93778994

Edited by Marybarton - 12 years ago

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Namrutha

@namrutha

Navigator

Posted: 12 years ago

#104

Originally posted by: Marybarton

Thank you Namrutha, you are really sweet! You know, I have this theory that CVs do fear FFs. My FFs from IPK had some lines, like "I love you dammit!" which was later seen in the show. There were a few others that made me reach the conclusion that they were read. I don't mind if CVs take from it. Other FF writers also feel the same.

I haven't decided on how many chapters there will be yet. But I am enjoying this process too much. Let's see how the readership holds. It depends on people's interest.

OMG!!! you wrote "I love you dammit" Wow! that is impressive👏...That line did the trick in expressing Arnav's passion with the right amount of aggression..Cvs definitely needs to fear as their career is at stake here with forum members having so much better ideas than them.

Take your time and let your imagination fly...I'm hooked, hoping for a great ride.

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music1

@music1

Dazzler

Posted: 12 years ago

#105

Mary ..buddy when is the next update?????can't wait😉

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ANAM

@khuwahish

Explorer

Posted: 12 years ago

#106

LOVELY START

WAITING TO READ MORE

PM PLZ...

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Marybarton

@Marybarton

Rocker

+ 8

Posted: 12 years ago

#107

Originally posted by: namrutha

OMG!!! you wrote "I love you dammit" Wow! that is impressive👏...That line did the trick in expressing Arnav's passion with the right amount of aggression..Cvs definitely needs to fear as their career is at stake here with forum members having so much better ideas than them.

Take your time and let your imagination fly...I'm hooked, hoping for a great ride.

Enjoy! Chapter 3 is on p. 14.

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jeenia123

@jeenia123

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#108

Great update... Looking forward for strong Astha, who will fight all her mighty to get her rights as wife...

Edited by jeenia123 - 12 years ago

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Aishwarya

@Aishaa3

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#109

Shlok still in love wid swati??🥺..N anjali👏🤗lookng fwd to hw astha counter attacks😈

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@rbb1

Elite

+ 4

Posted: 12 years ago

#110

loved your update, Astha the poor thing, I wonder what she will do now, please update it soon I want to read what happens next. I like how Anjali had the talk with Shlok.

Edited by rbb1 - 12 years ago

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FF: War Path (Aslok fight it out) - Page 11

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