Originally posted by: funny_fubar
Lovely post Chikki!
Compromise is definitely needed in any relationship whether it is out of love or arranged. I think what Raavi needs to address with Shiva is what the basis of the compromise is. I guess what Shiva is thinking that they might be ok for the present, but somewhere down the line, when there are bad days, he does not want her regretting her marriage and cursing her fate. (Have seen real life instances- that is why I am very wary of forced marriages). 10 years down the line it might be too late to do anything- now atleast Raavi has a chance to move on(difficult, but easier than when she will be in her 30s).
So Raavi definitely needs to address the insecurities. Not "I wanted something else before, now I am going to compromise", but "My needs and understanding have changed- I used to like something before, but now I like other things". Shiva is basing his assumptions on Raavi still wanting the same things from life
Yes Shiva is definitely wrong in not hearing her out. Maybe that is what Raavi wants to eventually touch upon as she speaks with him. Unfortunately, ShiVi have bad timing. If they had this conversation pre-Sneha kaand, Shiva might have even agreed with her and worked things out.
Insecurities do cloud a person's judgement. It is very burdensome for people surrounding the insecure person- just like us viewers are irritated with Shiva and want him to just grow up and deal with it. People give well meaning advice on either changing or learning to let go. Perfectly sound advice, but completely useless until the person works his way out of his insecurities.
We all agree Raavi needs to be loved and pampered. Maybe Shiva feels exactly the same. And what if he is convinced that he cannot be person, that he cannot change? This is not about wanting to change- he is refusing to even to take a step in the direction because his confidence is shot.
I also agree with your analysis of how difficult Raavi's life might be if she did get divorced. But despite the social pressue, divorce should always be option. Keeping aside my bias for Shiva, what if his push had injured her 😕 Or what if (hypothetically only) he had hit her in anger? She should definitely not stay in such a relationship, and should walk out. I'll go a step further and say, if she is being mentally battered in a relationship, shouldn't she walk away?(Here I am a bit unclear- is she being mentally or emotionally tortured? Somedays I feel yes, somedays no)
That said, this is a show, and we have a loved pair. All references to NDE, third angle, divorce are mainly plot points to move the story forward, not as a means to be insensitive. 😆 If the makers gave us progression through open communication and introspection, like the OG, no one would bother asking for this. When two characters are at a stale mate and refuse to talk to one another, how do you force a change? 🤷♀️
Again a thesis 🙈 I think I should impose a moratorium on my IF visits when PMSing
Very well said! Divorce should definitely be an option for both people in a marriage at all times.
I was also hoping for a divorce/NDE/separation/third angle for this reason: so that shivi and especially Raavi get a chance to think about the future of their relationship and their expectations from it in the long run..
This is again the fault of the makers who refuse to give them some common sense and let them have a heart to heart conversation 🤪
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