Collision - A MaNan Fan-Fiction Ch-11, pg-31 - Page 9

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ShenzK thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#81

Originally posted by: anushi3012

Hey I'm so glad you started Manan FF after the one shot which I really really appreciate!!

Well yes, we would like to have Manik POV from this night.
Can't wait for further update.

Another important note: As a reader, I really loved the way you penned it (no abrev, well described, the words,... the details between the lines!!! ๐Ÿ‘ - ' heyy can't wait for more!! 

Please pm me for next update. Its a kind request ๐Ÿ˜ณ

Eagerly waiting for the next chapter!!! 

Keep it up ๐Ÿ˜Š

Thanks, I am glad the initiative was appreciated. 

Updated, already.

Glad you like the way I pen down the chapters and trust me, neither do I as a reader prefer stories or any kind of a write up that's written in sl*g language or the text form. In fact this is the only way I write. 

PMed, already!
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Posted: 8 years ago
#82
Thank You!
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Posted: 8 years ago
#83

Originally posted by: zohasad2.0

coz I love u for continuing this.

thanks for the pm BTW.

and I loved his pov. I wanna see them meet again

Because I love you for commenting on this ๐Ÿ˜‰

 You don't need to thank me for the PM. ๐Ÿฅฑ

Thank You. For their next collision you have to wait for the next chapter, and before that read the one updated already. ๐Ÿ˜†
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Posted: 8 years ago
#84

Originally posted by: filter.coffee

Uff so good man so good!4000 words?i'd read your 40000 words on manan!i love absolutely love the way you write.now shenz not feeling well so zyada praise nahi kar payi.requesting dude PLEASE post the next chapter asap.can't wait can't wait can't wait


Hold on, Rez! You are scaring not just the fellow readers but even IF. IF doesn't take those many words as a post. Last time it ruined my post just because I added a good thank you note along with the chapter. And what did it do, BOOM! My note along with the update disappears and an error appears, the post exceed the limit. Damn the limit. 
But I understand your emotions. 

You have already praised me more than enough. You might feel this is less expressive of you. But I feel thousands of emotions when I read your comments. ^_^ You make me smile like an idiot. And Thanks for all of it. Thank You so damn much!! ^_____^
Well, posted already! :)
neha0002 thumbnail
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Posted: 8 years ago
#85
It was amazing update
Loved the conversation between nandini and manik
Please update the next part soon
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Posted: 8 years ago
#86

Originally posted by: khevnashukla

Plz post the next part...plz


Coming up in minutes
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Posted: 8 years ago
#87

Originally posted by: neha0002

It was amazing update

Loved the conversation between nandini and manik
Please update the next part soon

Thank You!!
Yeah! I know I am already, super late.. right on it. 
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Posted: 8 years ago
#88
Edited! ^_^


: : : Note : : : 

I know you people are more curious to get onto the update than to read some silly, long note. But trust me if you don't it is your loss more than mine! *pulls the puppy soft eyes*


So read the damn NOTE>>


Okay! A few suggestions really intrigued me in the comment box. By the way, I really loved all the comments and I appreciate your suggestions, wholeheartedly. Thanks a ton! ^_^ Really makes my day. So let's go through a few suggestions! 


Add a bit more humor - I try to make it as much fun as I can, trust me I seriously do. But maybe I fail miserably. *pouts* I will try harder next time.


Pace - I didn't tend to make it slow paced but had to clear a few things before I accelerate into full speed. I mean I do need to give a slight, if not complete, insight of their lives, Individual lives. 

PS : By the way there are a lot of upcoming scenes wherein you won't find MaNan sticking together but have a conversation with Eric or some other friends and not really their lovey dovey, so in case, that's something you are looking for.. MaNan lovey dovey, sorry for being a disappointment people this isn't exactly that. It's MORE.



Update it regularly - How regular do you mean by regular updates? {By the way I know this place lacks a PROPER schedule! My fault.}








Okay, now since you all see this place does not have a proper schedule for updates. And by this I mean, I lack the schedule. I am to be blamed. PHEW!

But seriously, I cannot work without deadlines. So it would be rather helpful if you guys help me out with this. Think of it and let me know how often you want this story updated. Do not. And I mean DO NOT tell me to update daily. Please! if you mean regularly and with your definition of regular is to update on daily basis, I would really freak out. Because then what I can give you is only 500-1000 words a day. But anyways.

When you suggest a deadline it has to be a range.. like say every 8-10 days with a word limit of 2000-2500 words. 

It would be great if I get the range for the length of the update as well..


All of this is only because I kinda work better, or rather lets put it like, I actually work when I have the deadline hanging on my head reminding me I gotta work. Last time when I worked on Tough Summers, this is how I worked, the only difference being I had myself chosen a deadline then. But this time, it doesn't really make sense to me.


Phew! That's all about the Schedule. I will let you people know about the schedule range when I update next time. ;)




Go read the update, now!
Edited by -shenz- - 8 years ago
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Posted: 8 years ago
#89

Chapter Three.
 
XXX
Manik's POV


Parking my car in the driveway, I jogged across the sidewalk, entering the garden area as I pushed aside the gates and made my way to the front door. The place seemed vaguely familiar as though it was the one that I once approached on this Friday night. Could it be?
 

 
Maybe I had taken a wrong turn or just drove down the same lane while she kept drifting back into my thoughts, no matter how much ever I tried to push her thoughts at the back of my mind. But it just bounced back with more force. I cannot be blamed for being highly intrigued by the cute infuriated kitten, now can I be?
 
 
Shrugging off the thoughts of otherwise, I rang the doorbell. It does no harm to drop by and wish a good morning to someone apart from a person who would have to wait a little longer for me, impatiently. Never mind.
 
 
The door still stood shut across my face. Now what takes a person that long to open a goddamn door? 
 


 
Pushing my hands into my pant pockets, I waited. Within minutes the door flung open and I saw the morning fresh face of Nandini. Instantly, my lips twitched into a smile and I am hopeful my eyes reflected the same.
 
 
Drawing my eyes lazily across her frame, I took a good look of her. Her midnight sky hair was let loose and down to her waist. The playful curls were gone as the straight shiny hair took back its place. Clad in a grey coloured T-shirt paired with a pair of ripped sky blue denim, she looked casual yet comfortable. She didn't seem to doll-up for school kind of a girl, and I knew that since the first time we met. But the thing is, she doesn't need it.
 
 
She looks good without any layer of makeup as well, just displaying her natural beauty.
 
 
My eyes finally meshed with her widened ones. Is there any moment when she lets her pair of eyes be in their normal size? I couldn't bite back the chuckle at the thought which earned me raised brow from her.
 
 
Before I had the chance to greet her, I was greeted most unexpectedly. "Hey Manik!" The voice startled me as much as her.
 
 
My eyes widened to the same size of hers. It was Eric, who appeared behind her. My eyes drifted back at Nandini, who constantly kept eyeing me as though she had just seen a ghost. Her lips pursed into a thin line and she kept gazing back at me as her eyes pleaded me to keep my mouth shut. What is happening here?
 
 
Eric came around and I got a good look at him. My jaws dropped wide open. He only had a skimpy towel around his hips, having his lean yet fit abdomen on display and the water droplets dripping from his wet showered hair. "I heard the door bell and I rushed back." He shrugged his wide shoulder whilst his eyes rested on Nandini. I bit back the urge to question his presence in Nandini's house, not to forget his appearance.
 
 
"You know him?" Nandini's soft voice rang into the air. I could literally see her eyes wandering at Eric suspiciously.
 
 
"Of course." The guy grinned as he leaned against the wall, his eyes dancing across her face. "Come on in, man!" He motioned me in.
 
 
I heard the question roll out of her mouth into a whisper as I walked past her, "Who?" The door clicked as he closed it behind me.
 
 
Playing pretentious, aren't we? I wanted to throw my head back and laugh at her attempts.
 
 
"Okay!" Eric inhaled deeply before he started again, "This is Manik, my best friend." He punched the side of my stomach. I wanted to return it back with double the force, though even before I could act upon it, he embraced me in a side hug.
 
 
His eyes trailed back at Nandini, who held confusion in her eyes. "And this out here," he motioned towards her, walking back to where she stood, "this is Nandini," his arms encircled around her shoulder as he announced, "Nandini Miller, my sister." I could only bring myself to nod.
 
 
His sister.
 
Oh! Finally the information sunk into my head.
 
 
"Eric, I think you need to go and," She waved her hands across his half-naked form indicating him to get dressed but he loved to tease around. So she added, scowling at his antiques, "and put on some clothes." Her eyes roamed around everywhere but me, "You wouldn't want an audience for a moment as embarrassing as having the towel slip down your..." she let her words trailed witnessing his reaction. She just did not try to go around and tease Eric that casually? This is something I couldn't really digest.
 
 
But Eric burst into bubbles of laughter as he said, "We have seen worse, little one."  True. We had seen much worse embarrassing situations to bother ourselves with something like posing naked.  My eyes fell on her tinted cheeks, noting that she was embarrassed to have even pointed it out. But recovering soon, she rolled her eyes at him.
 
 
He affectionately ruffled her hairs, making her puff her cheeks and pouting in disapproval. He made his way to one of the rooms, which I guess was his room. "Make yourself comfortable, dude!" I heard Eric scream from the room.
 
 



I turned around, letting my eyes drift from one object to other. Stepping closer to the couch in the living area, I was about to sit but that's when I felt fingers laced around my elbow, pulling me into the kitchen area. "What are you doing here?" She hissed.
 
 
Shouldn't I be the one to question this? I was supposed to make myself comfortable, as said by my best friend. "Eric asked me to give a ride to school."
 
 
"You won't tell him anything about Friday night." She told me rather threatened me not to. Seriously, threaten me? Got nothing better? 
 
Ridiculous.
 
Yet cute, a voice squeaked in my head. 
 
 
Knitting my brows together, I narrowed my eyes at her. Dare to repeat again. Her eyes softened, holding a plea and she mouthed a, "Please!"
 
Now how do you deny that bundle of cuteness?
 
 
"I wasn't going to." I uttered with utmost honesty. And the instant the words left rolled out of my mouth, she sighed. Because it wasn't my story to tell him.
 


 
Suddenly I caught the sight of mouthwatering pancakes with some whipped cream and some syrup, I guess. It looks deliciously edible to me and without another word, I make myself comfortable on the stool near the kitchen counter and grabbed the dish that held the delicacy. All this while she was engrossed in her thoughts. I seriously feel the need to report her zoning out issues to Eric, now that I know she is my best friend's sister.
 
Her voice broke my trance this time, "You never told me, you knew Eric?" I didn't glance up her way yet I was pretty sure confusion scribbled all over her face. Chopping the pancakes effortlessly, I gobbled up a piece letting the flavors melt. Even before I could answer her, Eric announced his presence.
 
Wrong timing, dude.



 
 
"Since you were too busy getting dressed up to impress the girls at school," Knowing this would irritate him, I did it intentionally. And as expected, was interrupted. 
 
 
"Oh! I do not need to dress up to impress anyone." He smirked. Well, we all knew Eric was one of the most popular guys among the girls at school. So, yes, he did not really need to dress up to impress those bunch of girls at school. Even if he walks with nothing on, they would throw themselves on him.
 
 
"Don't you think, little one?" His attention drifted to Nandini and she was still puzzled. He has got her a good endearment to call with, since she is tiny when compared to him. He was tall like me. 
 
 
"Do not mention me and your fan-girls in the same line, Eric." Her tone held a stern warning that need not be avoided. Her voice would have made any guy shudder but Eric rather chuckled.
 
 
"Anyways," I said drawing their attention back at me, "as I was saying, since you were too busy getting dressed up to impress the girls at school, I had to help myself with the breakfast," I pointed at the pancakes I was so engrossed in with my fork. Eric's eyes widened at the view as did Nandini's.

 
What's wrong, now?
 
 
"You are having pancakes?" The amused voice of Eric boomed into the room.
 
 
Yeah, genius, I am. You get the hamper for guessing it so right, was the only thought that ran in my head.
 
 
He turned his head, tilting it such that his eyes met hers, "and you let him?" I seriously wasn't getting a thing about this conversation. All she responded with was a pout. Her lips formed a cute little pout.
 
 
Did I not tell her something specific about her lips, the last time we met? Or do I need to remind her?


 
 
"I thought it was your favorite for breakfast. One of the reasons, why I had to work a little harder to get the breakfast ready." He didn't sound please, not even a bit. Goodness sake, that's just the breakfast.
 
 
"It is but now there isn't any other option." Her expression softened and I could see her resemble to the cute little kittens with the soft, pleading, hopeful eyes. "It's fine. I will have something else." She walked into the kitchen area, maybe trying to grab something edible for herself.
 
 
"We could share." I spoke, trying not to sound desperate or over excited. But just out of helping nature. She responded with a gentle smile and shook her head slightly, in negation.
 
 
"I had eggs and toast made for you." I heard Eric's voice, seemingly accusing. From the corner of my eyes, I saw Nandini grab eggs and toast for herself. Fair enough! I get to eat her breakfast and she gets to eat mine.
 
 
"How was I supposed to know?" He barked back at him in response. "Now care to answer a few questions of mine?" I was really impatient. He had a lot of questions to answer, to be frank.
 
 
"We can do that later." He said with finality. Okay! "You don't really have to push it right now." He scoffed, giving me some secret message through his eyes. 
 
 
Oh boy! I am bad at reading eyes, didn't anyone tell you about it? You have been my best friend for years now; didn't you find that thing about me, ever?
 
 
"You leave me with no option." I shrugged dropping off the topic, "You didn't even notify me that you were going to be back in town." Now I was the one accusing.
 
 
"I wanted to buy some time to spend with this, little one," he pointed accusingly at her, while she chose to witness the two of us having the war-of-words as she ate in silence, "we had some catching-up to do." His tone became rough edged and serious.
 
 
"Eric." She warned. Did she think he was slipping too much of information to a stranger like me? I wanted to pout at the thought. I was his best friend for the sake of heavens.
 
 
"I do remember Eric mentioning about you," I ignored her amused look, "it is just that I didn't expect you to be already here." Her eyes suddenly seemed to have taken interest in the floor.
 
 
"No offence, but this friend of mine," my eyes narrowed at Eric, "forgets to pass the useful information." And that's how the breakfast went on with the accusing game.
 
 
 


 
Once we had our breakfast, I decided it was time to head to school. "I think we should get going."
 
 
Eric gave his signature curt nod in response, while Nandini still came up with the same line again, "I seriously think I should walk to school." Like this was the fifth time she had repeated the damn line. Can I rip my hair apart? When will she ever understand to zip that mouth of hers and act without being so stubborn, for once in her life? Will she do that?
 
 
"I am not going to take no for an answer." I heard my best friend state in a stern manner reflecting he wasn't up for an argument.
 
 
"You didn't even ask me, to even start with." She whined, stomping her feet against the marble tiled floor as she collected her bag from the nearby table.
 
 
"Because it's waste of time." He reasoned. I let my head roll back as the soft laughter escaped my lips. This was hilarious. "Don't be unreasonable, we have to reach school if not before, then at least on time."
 
 
"I can walk." I heard her complain. Seriously, she couldn't come up with anything better?
 
 
"I never said that you can't." He was defensive now. But seriously, what was so wrong with cars that she had to turn down the offer whenever she was offered for a drive. This is the second time she is rejecting to get into my car and this time, I am not the only person to be there with her, she has freaking brother by her side, so that means she does not need to be concerned.
 
 
"Okay!" Eric let out a heavy breath. Don't tell me, you are giving up, man? Just don't! "Get inside the car, now. End of discussion." Thankfully. His eyes narrowed at her, challenging her to speak another word and I would witness World War 3.
 
 
I thought she might now stop behaving like the tantrum queen but rather, "This isn't the end of discussion, Eric Miller." Her voice was equally firm and with that she stormed out to driveway. We both made our way to the car as well. I saw her eyes widened as she took the view of my car, she was baffled but didn't utter another word, thankfully.
 
 




The drive was silent until the car came to an abrupt halt when she screamed to stop. "I need to get down here." I looked around; we weren't at school yet, but close.
 
 
Eric snapped his head to look into her eyes and she answered, "I still need time." His eyes settled with certain emotion and he seemed fine with whatever explanation she handed him.
 
 
She hoped out of the car and Eric blew the unexpected, "My cell number is on the speed dial on your cell phone and so is Manik's." 
 
 
Wait, when did that happen? And why? Not that I am complaining but can I ever be informed before having such information popped on surprisingly at me?
 
 
And to my dislike he added further to his oh-so-loving speech, "In case, you need it. He will be around. You can walk upto him anytime when needed and I am not around. He will be like your brother." 


WHAT? I need to punch him to bring him back to his senses. But even before that could happen, she clears out the air.
 

 
"For your kind information, I am still coping up with a brother, who is loving and caring yet extremely annoying at times." She passed him one of her genuine smiles. "So thanks but no thanks, I don't need another jerk of a brother." Phew! That was close. She denied. But she even called me a jerk. Yet, she denied.
 
 
"Fine, as a friend. But at least keep in touch with him when I am not around or whenever you need." Her gaze was calculative as she thoughtfully looked at him. "Please!" He pleaded.
 
 
"Okay!" She scoffed. "Now, I really need to rush and so do the two of you. Bye." She waved moving along the sidewalk and I pulled the car, tailing along her. In response, she rolled her eyes at me and waved her hand with her eyes travelling past Eric and meeting mine, which Eric didn't seem to have noticed for he thought the wave was for him.
 
 

"Bye, little one." Eric bid her smilingly, whilst I mouthed a 'bye' along with a wink in her direction. And then I raced the car onto the road, knowing that all she could have reacted would have been her eyes going all wide, or popping out and maybe stomping as well.
 
 





Parking the car into the empty slot of the parking area of the school, I turned my attention towards my friend. He had some real questions to answer.
 
 
"When were you going to tell me that you would be leaving that apartment of yours?" I asked furrowing my brows.
 
 
"Well," he started but could come up with nothing. He wasn't really planning on telling me anything soon. 
 
 
"Speak up, for the love of good lord." I yelled at him, his eyes rounded wide reflecting his shock. Just like Nandini.
 
 
"Well," he stretched the word as if it was his girlfriend's name that he was so dearly holding onto.
 
 
"We don't have all the time in the world." His eyes now scrutinized me.
 
 
"So you have to let me speak." He stated pointedly as a matter of fact.
 
 
"I had to leave the apartment." Running his fingers through his hair in frustration, he growled. "I couldn't let Nandini live there," he paused to look carefully at me, definitely examining the confusion across my face and then added, "with those boys. They would have scared the shit out of her, or even worse made her uncomfortable and she would have gradually run off." He scowled. 
 
 
"That's the last thing I would ever wish to happen." Strangely, I do understand. "So I decided it's high time I moved back to my house, the one where I and Mum stayed. I haven't been there in a long time but now with Nandini, I now its right." He is touchy with the family issue. 
 
 
"So why did you call me to give you a ride to school when you could have easily walked?" I was just attempting to change the subject but I did ask a valid question. "Also, since your sister has so much of a problem with cars." I scrunched my nose at the thought of the numerous times she had rejected my car.
 
 
"She is still hiding." Mind me asking from what? But rather he continued, "She is still coping up with the half-brother out here," he pointed at himself with a goofy smile plastered along, "and as she says, and I quote, 'going around the school having the most popular boy as your brother, doesn't really help, brother'." He air quotes her, mockingly. "I mean can you imagine she said that." He gave out a fake hurt look though he was betrayed by his eyes holding the glint.
 
"I pity that poor soul." I murmured, fully intending to make those words clearly heard by Eric. 
 
"Whatever." Rolling his eyes, he continued. "Plus, I wanted her to meet my best friend." Oh! Such a softie. "Anyways," his tone turned emotionless, "Drop her home after school." I glared at him, did he not learn a term like 'please' while requesting a favor, but wait he wasn't really requesting rather ordering around. The nerve!
 
I roll my eyes at him. Not that I wouldn't enjoy dropping her home, I could see the flashes of last Friday night when something similar happened, play in front of my eyes. I dropped her home, safely!
 
"Why, what are you doing, to have me pick your sister and drop her home?" I need not be reminded of the time when she had rejected my car ride time and again, and again all over. 
 
"I have to get my things from the apartment and also collect my car from the garage, which is after I finish my shift at work." He huffs and I made a face of understanding, 'okay'.
 
"So you don't have to resume this 'pick up and drop service' from tomorrow on." He added with a look of fake sympathy.
 
 
 
Before we get late for our classes, we head out of my car and move out of the parking lot, when suddenly he mentions something that stuns me.
 
 
"Take care of her." And just like that I am handed the responsibility of babysitting his baby sister, his 'little one'. 
 




Thoughts, suggestions, everything. ^_^


I have been busy like hell since a couple of weeks, so this late update. Surely not an excuse, just stating. And did I not to mention I had to re-write this damn-freaking chapter for a certain reason which got me all riled up.. that's one messy situation I would never wanna be in, again. But then on the other hand, didn't take me really much time. 


Also, don't forget to write your thoughts about the characterization of Manik, Nandini and Eric! I would be waiting to hear all of it.


PHEW! That's all ^_^

Hopefully, I would get back soon.
Edited by -shenz- - 8 years ago
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Posted: 8 years ago
#90
PMs later, tomorrow, hopefully!

Do make sure, you have read the note above the update post.
Edited by -shenz- - 8 years ago