Arshi FF: The Valiant Knight - Thread 8 - Completed - Note on Page 142 - Page 50

The tenacious grip on the door handle loosened and her arm dropped to her side without any vitality, as 9 months of theatre unfolded before her eyes. The chanting of words I am only Yours that determinedly started the journey from her home, were trailed off weakly as she heard what the lawyer had seen in the video.

With the shrill sound of her bangles rubbing against the metal door knob, Arnav turned around to find Khushi standing at the door. Her eyes dilated in horror, pulse against her throat swollen beating erratically, and her whole body shuddered evidently in dire consternation.

Khushi...Arnav whispered in fear as her stance altered lifelessly on her already swollen feet. As he turned completely towards her, she stared straight into his eyes, her distended eyes mirroring her broken soul.

Aman swore remembering the time Arnav had given Khushi, an administrative access card to any room in the office, which is why she was able to enter without a wave of precautious chime.

Arnav twisted his arm behind his back and shoved the DVD to Aman, hoping that she didnt hear a word that she was not supposed to. However Arnav understood better than that, her eyes speaking volumes of her knowledge about the truth but he ignored trying to push his luck. Khushi's gaze followed his hand as he shoved the disc into Aman's hands and as he walked towards her.

He reached her in few long strides enquired with faint quiver in his voice clearly expressing his frights, Khushi, tum yahan? You needed something? You should have called...

Ignoring his questions, she took a step away refusing his touch, her demeanor screaming the quietness before storm. Arnav fisted his palms in pain dreading this moment.  

Already having inclination of her withdrawal state, he gave up and gestured Aman to leave them alone. Aman nodded and was about to leave when Khushi blocked him spreading her arm out, DVD!

Aman eyes rounded in shock and looked at Arnav questioningly and all he got was a painful squeeze of Arnav's eyes, realizing that its going to be an unrelenting fight to stop her.  Arnav turned around to the attorney and scowled, Wait in the reception. Dont you dare run away!

Once the man left the three alone, Arnav opened the door for Aman saying, Destroy it, without any traces!

Khushi fiercely stepped in between the men, Aman DVD! She spread her hand out once again.

Khushi, step aside. Let him go. Arnav held her arm, and she instantly lashed his hand away.

What is the damn matter with you? Why are you pushing me away? His voice mirrored how deeply hurt he is with her cold shoulder while Aman in dilemma of thorns didnt know what to do as she blocked his way.

Aman, you dont have any business to take it along with you. Give it to me. Royally ignoring Arnav, Khushi notched up her voice firmly.

Bhabhi, Arnie is right, pl..

Aman I am not in a position for any sort of fu*king negotiations. Give it to me before I slap the sh*t out of you. Khushi barked at him at the verge of losing herself, and the next moment, she found herself being swiftly turned by Arnav holding her elbow. Watch your words Khushi. I do not appreciate you disrespecting him when all he is doing is following my orders. Dont take it out on him.

Glowering at Arnav, she took step backwards into the room once again putting distance between them, as she realized, its going to be tough to win the battle against Arnav. Standing closer to the edge of an opened floor-to-ceiling window, she spoke, anger very much evident in her voice, I apologize I didnt know I need to follow etiquettes to discuss about my rape.

Arnav stood rooted to his ground, his ears crowing in detest at the choice of four letter word that he had never accepted its existence since the truth happened. Until that moment, he was under the impression that Khushi heard only part of his conversation with the lawyer but her latest statement uttered in distressed voice proved that every action he took, up until now to hide the truth just watered away and he stood perplexed, bewildered wondering what and how, fearing how she is going to deal with it.

I need to know what happened. I have every right to know what happened. Until then I am not leaving this spot. She moved further deep down to the open ledge as Arnav's eyes widened visioning danger.

Khushi, you dont need to know about that disc. I will explain. Trust me, I will tell you everything. Please come to me. He approached her cautiously outstretching his hand, fright blatantly glistening in his eyes.

I am not a coward to take my life but I am not a person who would want to live life in pretense. I will not hesitate to take that one step if you dont give me the disc. She showed her hand gesturing him to stop in his tracks. Ever since she understood the hidden truth, she has been holding herself strong not to break down knowing Arnav is just a step away, when all of her wanted nothing but to throw herself onto him and cry her life out. But she needed to be stubborn and away from Arnav to get all the truth from him without breaking down. 

And Arnav is no less, he clearly understood her plight from her hooded eyes, from her unshed tears threatening to make grand appearance any moment, that she is fighting herself and also that she is not going to give up until he obliges.

Pushing his hands into his trousers, he stood a feet away from Khushi and spoke firmly, Aman, evacuate the entire building. Handle Sharma and keep the disc on the table before you exit. And make sure access to this room is suspended until you hear from me again.

Aman did as he was told but not before giving a concerned look at the couple.

As soon as Aman left, Khushi stepped down the ledge and walked towards the table and grabbed the disc. She turned to put the disc in the media player they often use for presentations, when Arnav held her wrist and took the disc away from her hands.

He opened the case and was about to break the disc into two, when she took step forward threateningly, Anything you do to that, I swear I will never speak to you in my life.  

He caught her arms, and pleaded, Please dont do this, Khushi. I dont know whats in that disc but whatever it is, it will shatter both of us. I dont want you to go through any more pain. Please, listen to me. She ignored his pleas and snatched the disc from his hands, Khushi, Let me win at least this argument, for god's sake. He barked behind her as she moved towards the player. She stopped in her tracks and turned around to look at him...

Win? Against whom? Me, a loser? Her voice choked in defeat and and the air around them thickened as she gasped.

Goddammit, Khushi, what will make you understand? Dont f*cking do this to yourself and to me.

Dont interfere, back off...

Khushi, Please...

I said BACK OFFF before I do something to myself...GOOO..She screamed pushing him away...

Kh..

GOOO..She screamed on top of her voice, taking loud gasp of breath. Looking at her feeble frame, Arnav had no choice but to force himself to back off.

Her fingers trembled and she shivered as the screen showed disc reading icon...

The video started with Adi zooming out as he hooked cell phone somewhere to record it, with someone's giggles in the background. As he cleared from the lens, it was Khushi lying on the bed giggling.

Khushi clamped her palms to her mouth as she saw herself lifting her arm and calling Adi to the bed, murmuring Looong Night...Arnav squeezed his eyes shut behind his padded palms and turned away leaning his forehead against the wall helplessly.

How was your special drink Honey? The vicious smile echoed through the room as Adi took her skin into brutal assault. Arnav fisted his palms punched his knuckles to the the wall as cold chills plagued him, while Khushi's breath was ripped from her lungs.

Arnav turned around with bloody eyes hearing her pain-filled whimpers Arnav...what..you..you..smelll...diff...Hearing her take his name, crushed his heart ripping in half as though an unsharpened knife thrusted into it slowly and deeply killing his existence.

I thought it was You...An insurmountable pressure built up in her chest as Khushi murmured taking a glance at broken Arnav, in dire need to explain herself one more time.

Arnav hurriedly walked over to her hearing her stutter. Holding her arms, He kissed her hair, murmuring in choked voice, Never your fault..

Looking over his shoulder, she continued to watch the video, unable to pay much attention to what Arnav was saying.

He took away my Di and you are going to pay price for it...HE IS DESTROYED...

Arnaaav...Please...Sto..Hurtsss...

Arnav unable to contain himself anymore, he swiftly turned his feet and pulled her into a hug...Stop punishing yourself, please. Arnav refused himself to watch the feeble cries of Khushi repeatedly taking his name while Khushi adamantly watched it over his shoulder.

Why was I making those sounds? I didnt know it was him. Otherwise I wouldnt have entertained him black&white, I swear!...She pulled away from the hug and stared at him blankly. Pangs of shuddering wracked his body unable to answer her as he realized she affixed her reasonings in denial.

Her feeble attempts to fight the man, which didnt look like she was fighting instead came across as if engaging herself completely due to her torpor state. Arnav...Arnav...Smooth..Please...Hearing his name repeatedly on that night and witnessing the brutal plunge into her with baseless reasons, his eyes stung with anguish as tears streamed down his stubbled cheeks while she stood in her place in complete shock.

Holding her face, You were drugged Khushi, you had no control. Can we please end it now? Please..I cant take it anymore. Please stop punishing me.

Why was I participating taking your name? I shouldnt be doing that..She gradually started losing her self in bewilderment and she couldnt register anything he was saying. She gently pushed him away noticing something in the video.

Khushi took the remote and rewinded the video and replayed. She was staggered to find Arnav opening the door and watching them.

Aap aaye thay? She snapped her head towards him in shock.

He made many futile attempts to hide and hold back his tears but even they betrayed him, telling her how painfully those moments crashed him to his bones.

She re-rewinded the clip again and again to watch him entering with a smile, and leaving in a shock.

She didnt fail to notice a single step he took towards her in the video, and she looked away in shame hearing her own moans that stopped him from making that move. She covertly crossed her arms against her chest turning her back to him, feeling disgusted with herself, as she muttered, How could you find me in such state with someone else? Her eyes streamed with flood of tears, her voice quivering in shame knowing that he saw her.   

That was the last thing Arnav expected off her. He would have taken her accusations but never her self-hatred and if he leaves her that moment, he was sure, she is going to lose the will to live.

Turning her away from the screen, he firmly held her arms and shook her into life. Whatever happened there, was not your fault. We were manipulated, you were drugged and what happened there was nothing but a cheap act to avenge me. You are not responsible for any of it. You still mean the same and more to me but never less. Together we will cross this hurdle, we will..

We will cross this hurdle? How? She pushed him away...Tell me how? Everyday seeing this scars on my body? or Imagining you stand by the door of our bedroom everytime you come close to me? Do you have any idea what you are talking about or what happened here to me?

Khushi, I...

She pounced on him holding his lapels...What happened to your promises that you will protect me? Where did you go that night without taking me along? Without arranging men around me to protect me? How could you disappear leaving me all by myself without saying a word to me?  or Calling me? Where the hell were you? She yelled at him shaking him vigorously.

Khushi, I misunderstood you that night, I am so..

What part of me are you not understanding here? Did I ask your justification on why you walked away from that door that night? Is that how I sounded right now? If you think yes, I am sorry to say that I am disgusted with your opinion about me. I should be called as an inglorious fool if I even raise a single question knowing how reacted at that door. She pushed him away splaying her palms on his chest while he looked at her in dismay.

Each painful memory cutting him deeper than the last, her tears relentlessly flowed itching her as they dried on her burning skin and she looked at him helplessly.

When you could give me every first, hug, kiss, care, concern, that I never experienced before, why did you fail in this? You said nobody will harm me, How could let someone take away everything I had, everything I had for you and only for you. How could you? How could you let this happen black&white? She bunched his shirt at his chest as he pulled her into hug.

He took away everything I took pride in. He took away everything that belongs to you. I am only yours, but he took away me. He took away everyth...She cried on his chest losing the sense of self, hating her own body betraying her, leaving the scars of lifetime. He wrapped his arms around her bathing her protectively in his shadow, his heart bursting with emotion.  

It was gut wrenching sense of pain and loss that really encouraged him to scream and rage over their fate, her tears stabbing into his heart. Taking a deep breath and swallowing his own grief, he pulled her away from the hug and made her sit on the couch as he sat on his knees in front of her.

Wiping her tears, It doesnt matter who came or comes inbetween us, it doesnt matter what happened or happens with us, and it certainly doesnt matter where you are and where I am, You are always mine and no one took you away from me. It hurts me everyday that you went through all this torture because of someone's hatred towards me but I will try my best to give you everything it takes to make you forget this dark phase.

Khushi stared at him blankly, the man who roared for his rights once, kneeled in front of her in surrender. Is that what she wanted in life from him? No, never. But at that moment she couldnt understand what he is giving up until she felt his hand on her stomach, which is when realized that she is pregnant with Adi's child. She gasped loudly and threw up, Arnav instantly sat up next to her wrapping her convulsive frame as she threw up nothing but burning bile. She stood putting away distance, shaking her head rigorously in denial while Arnav looked at her in confusion.

You were right all along...I am not carrying your child. This is not our child...

He stood up to reach her as she turned hysterical...This is not my child...This is his child...Its not mine...take him away. She rubbed her palms on her stomach in disgust...I knew it this cant be my child...take him away now...

Khushi..stop..Dont do this to the baby...Its innocent..

I dont care...Its not yours and I refuse to bear anyone else's child other than yours..Why didnt you tell me to abort?

We talked about it. You wanted to keep the child...

Have you gone mad? I was talking about our child then...What have I done? She cried covering her face in her palms...

He stood shocked hard to believe her words...As far as he knew she is not a person who would abandon a child then what made her talk like that...Suddenly he felt lonely and suffocated with the events and decisions he had taken for them...Has he been all wrong about her decision not to abort...He stood paralyzed realizing to what extent she had buried herself in him.

Take him away..do something...Just do something...

Khushi, please dont do this to yourself and to the baby...Its too late Khushi, please calm down...I promise we will get through this. He tried to hold her calm but she turned unmanageable with each passing sec, disgusted with herself as if something creepy is all over her.

I dont want to get through with this child...take it away from my body..Please take it away...She swayed her hands rapidly around her tummy, trying to get rid of the innocent life from herself.

Kh...

Its not our baby...Why dont you get it? Just rip it off my skin, please...I beg you..I cant be mother to anyone but your child..Why dont you understand the simple fact? Please help me please...Her voice trailed off into her shaky sobs and a gush of blood poured between her thighs as she weakly held onto Arnav's shoulders...

Khu..Khushi...Amaaan...Amaan...He yelled on top of his voice, shuddering in fright, as she hung onto him in bare consciousness. He settled her on the couch and ran outside to call for help but the office is totally abandoned and he realized he had sent Aman to handle the lawyer. Suddenly he felt everything around him slowed down with only him fighting against the speed of time. He turned stiff and mechanical as he ran back to Khushi to find her in excruciating pain as she clutched onto her hips. He cupped her face and spoke sternly, Dont you dare give up on me now...Stay strong, I am finding help...He sat near her knees and his fingers not wanting to co-operate fumbled with phone as he dialed...

Di...Khushi ko kuch ho raha hay  Di...Help us please...

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He sat in the hospital lounge, in absolutely blank state as he didnt know where to start and where to draw a line to his tormented thoughts...So much life seen, so many decisions taken to make it all perfect for her but as if their relation accursed, everything fell apart in the blink of an eye...and at the end of the day she is still unhappy, more than ever he had seen.

He couldnt utter a word, nor he could cry a tear, as he rolled his head back to the wall rendering himself in complete surrender to their twisted fates. The feeling of his heart shattered into a million pieces like a broken mirror, was so intense and crystal clear that all he could see is her tattered face in the shards of glass.

The only saving grace of the time being Khushi out of any danger from abruption. Her umbilical cord was twisted so much that it started rubbing against her placenta which caused abruption and hence bled profusely. Anjali sent care lift to the AR while she arranged for the labor room and got Khushi's medical records transferred in moments notice. Within mins, they arrived, Anjali examined Khushi and announced that she is out of danger and is now in active labor.

It was the most painful moment of Arnav's life to refuse to go into the labor room as he realized, as long as he is infront of Khushi, she will not welcome the child...He had no idea what made him think that but he took that harrowing decision hoping once she sees the child she will melt down like every other mother. He hoped against every hope promising himself this is the last time he is staying away from her.

While one part of him want to jump in joy that he is the NUMBER ONE in her life, the other part dreaded to think that he is becoming curse in her life, making it impossible to see life beyond him. He cursed the moment he wished she placed him above all else and he cursed the moment he wished she loved him more than anything and anyone in this world...

Arnav opened his eyes sensing someone plunging into seat next to him. It was Aman with mug of coffee.

Thank You. Arnav mumbled weakly watching Aman keeping the mug on the coffee table. Aman took a moment to look at the pale face, sunken eyes, that screamed nothing but fear. Fear once used to fear to get to ASR, seemed to successfully rule him this day. Aman leaned over and hugged his friend not because Arnav could use a hug but it was devastating for Aman to see the man he took up as role model started to splinter.  

I am OK Aman. Arnav whispered feigning a smile as Aman pulled himself out of the embrace.

Are you? Aman with tear filled eyes asked demanding Arnav's attention.

Arnav remained silent taking sip of black coffee. After a moment of washing his mouth with hot liquid, Is there anyway I could reverse the clock and refuse to come along with you that night. Drawing patterns on the rim of his cup, focusing on the steaming vapors that clouded his drought-hit eyes, I will trade anything my fate demands for that one wish to come true.

Aman remained silent and looked at him helplessly.

I guess not! Jerking his head nonchalantly, She will be alright soon if not this day. I will make sure. He said determinedly not letting himself lose hope.

Where is Nani and Buaji?

There is a temple few blocks away. They went to get Prashad.

Arnav nodded and he craned his head up to find a nurse coming towards them in panic.

Sir, Dr. Raizada is calling you. Its urgent.

Is Khushi OK? Arnav panicked already hurtling his feet from the crowded furniture.

She is refusing to deliver, to push the baby out.

What? Arnav ran his feet as fast as he could.

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Khushi lied on the hospital bed looking at the ceiling aimlessly unable to register what everyone else in the medical team are screaming around and the physical pain of contractions no longer seemed to be much bothering than the sickening mental anguish she is going through. Anjali's instructions flew in the air recklessly and all she could think about was one man, one night, and his words that imprinted in every nerve of her being...

Did I understand your confession right that you are mine?

I never denied that fact at first place.  

Please say it the way I need to hear it.

I am only YOURS and can never be anyone else's.

I swear when I say you are mine and only mine. Dont ever take you away from me

Relapsing into another round of heartbreak, she realized she has nothing more to lose and nothing more she has, to give the man who loved her beyond his means. She looked towards her feet as someone shook her up vigorously. It was Anjali screaming something harshly at her. Khushi scrunched her face unable to understand where she is and looked around to trying to comprehend the world around her. She shivered not seeing Arnav but soon everything came back to her senses hearing Anjali's yells.

Khushi, you need to start pushing...Do it sweetheart...Baby is ready...

Khushi took a look at her belly, Anjali...

I am right here dear, All I need is one push.

Anjali, is there a way you could vanish this child...

K..Kya? Wh..

Can you do some miracle please? I need to keep my promise to him. He has nobody but me...He wont say it but I know he will suffer for me all his life. Can you please help me Anjali? This is the last chance I have, please? She asked naively assuming that her wish will come true...

Khushi I have no idea what you are talking. And I wish I had time to ask you further...Can we talk about it later? For now, push harder and faster, baby's shoulders might get stuck...The typical doctor in herself kicked in. As Khushi started turning unresponsive and stubborn, Anjali sent one of the nurses to call Arnav inside.

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