I think this is the end. Mostly completed, I think.
I have no idea what has happened in previous chapters. Loopholes in this story is now probably the size of Mars and the plot has parked its ass on the dark side of the moon. (Lots of space reference, I know. Watching Cosmos, so bite me.)
If I think of something insane, I will probably post it here just as epilogue or coda. Doesn't matter, really. I had so much fun in writing the way I usually speak. No pretentious dialogues or long winded sentences. Hope you guys had fun too. Tell me all about it!
Chapter 10:
It had been busy few months which had him immersed in work too much to notice the world around him. It had his family worried. It had his staff worried. He ignored their worrisome looks and bent his head down and continued to work.
"Did I tell you I discovered new brand of panties and that they are maha-awesome?" Khushi plops on a chair opposite to him. His jaw refused to close. She sat cross legged on the chair and opened Lays party pack. Knowing Khushi, that massive chips packet was a snack in between appetizer and main course. "You want some?" She asked after cramming handful of chips in her mouth and chewed noisily.
It shouldn't surprise him anymore but Khushi always managed to knock his cool persona and render him to a rattling idiot. Like always, he gave in. If not anything the conversation would provide him a much deserved break from the shitty workload he had been having.
He shrugged, pulled few chips from packet and asked, "Do I want to know?"
She nodded eagerly. "It was like destiny waiting to happen you know? I was there, it was there and the meeting was inevitable. After few weeks of being together I know for sure that this it sir. This is what I have been waiting for all my life."
"Good panties make your life complete?" He grinned. "I never heard that before." He crowed.
'Dude! You just didn't go there. Don't you know anything? This is practically sealing your fate as her boo and being BFFs till you die.! What's next? Sharing make up tips? Skin care regime? No wait, you guys already do that. Best post-wax moisturizers, really? Did you have to tell her you wax your chest and which is the best product out there? How much of a dumbass can you be?' His subconscious was practically shrieking.
'Do you think you can change your obnoxious nasal tone to something better? I mean you are Jarvis to my Iron Man. And while you are at it pick up British accent will you? Its kind of awesome.' Arnav hummed keeping an interesting face but mentally berating his subconscious.
'No can do douche-bag. I like the way I sound and the view up here from this moral high horse am housed at is pretty awesome. Listen to me dumbass: tell her how you feel about her. Don't come crying, panties in a bunch when she gets tired of waiting for you to make a goddamn move and settles for the next best thing available.'
'I am handling it the way its supposed to. So f**k you very much. ' Arnav replied, calmly and turned his attention to Khushi.
"Excuse you," Khushi sniped. "Little things like these makes life easier and more enjoyable." She poured a sugary drink in my coffee mug and pushed towards me. "Drink." She commanded softly.
He picked the mug without a fuss. She continued, "I wrote a poem. Wanna read?" She waggled her eyebrows. Now this, was grade A entertainment.
"Give it to me," he said, making grabby hands. She grinned and handed a piece of paper.
There was once a young girl in ASR's office
who purchased underwear like a novice.
they tugged and twisted at all wrong times,
she twitched and flailed to hide their crimes.
Cheap polyester gave her rashes
expensive lace gave her itches.
mixed cotton stuck to her skin
and nylon was its closest kin.
A miracle occurred during junk food run
when she pulled a package just for fun.
Lo! Behold! A panty fell
was it destiny, she couldn't tell
caressing fingers all but sighed
the item was immediately purchased.
she is now a darling of the parties
thanks to her lovely jockey panties.
The laughter that bubbled out of him was uncontrollable. He giggled, the sugary drink escaping his mouth and ending on his pristine white shirt.
"You wrote an ode to your panties?" He asked once the giggling fit subsided.
She grinned and nodded, continuing to pat tissues on his shirt. "What can I say sir. When I am happy, I am happy."
"Is it that simple?" He asked, looking away from her.
He can feel than see her shrug. "It should be, if it isn't." She replied simply.
Seeing how the conversation started to hit home, he took his standard cowardly way of dealing things. Ignore, deny and deflect. "I haven't seen much of SSS anymore." He said instead.
'You are such a screw up.' The tone of his subconscious was fond.
Khushi looked thoughtful. "I think its kind of failure. I am not sure if the scenario was executed wrong or if you weren't a good test subject." He wondered for half a second if she was disappointed in him. He pushed the thought away immediately it crossed his mind.
"Maybe you should stick to being yourself." He said looking elsewhere. "I hear its the best think you can and ever will be."
'Dude, stop looking at weird ass plant and look her in the eye.' Now his Jarvis was exasperated. 'Will you stop calling me Jarvis?' Arnav ignored it but took its advice anyway. To his luck, Khushi's face was half immersed in Lays bag. He sighed. So much for heart-to-heart.
"No one likes me when I am myself." She grunted after fishing out largest piece of chip she could find in the bag and shoved it completely in her mouth. The moan she let out was po*n-worthy. But he wasn't going to say that aloud.
'Don't f**k this chance asshole. Make daddy proud.' Mental Jarvis warned. He rolled his eyes.
"I like you. Just the way you are" He said cooly.
Khushi stopped mid-chew, eyes wide. "Like like like?" She asked.
"Is that grammatically correct?" He blurted instead of answering like any normal person would. "Three words in a sentence and all of them are same. It's one of those sentences which makes perfect sense when spoken aloud with voice modulation but fails in delivery when written. And now I will stop talking about unimportant stuff." He finished seeing how Khushi's eyes went comically wider.
"Oh." Was her intelligent reply.
"Oh?" He prodded, voice shrill.
"Oh." She nodded vigorously.
"Good Oh or bad Oh?" His IQ dipped dangerously low.
"Good Oh." She replied confidently.
"Good." He replied. Suddenly they were two cave people with limited vocabulary.
'Then all the more reason to whack her head, throw her on your shoulder and have your way with her in your cave.' Jackass version of Jarvis crooned in his head.
"This changes everything." She said standing up and gathering trash.
"What do you mean?" He asked, his heart sinking a little.
"Well, I still have few more scenarios to check which are pretty much wasted after this conversation. So I will have to dive right to the encore."
"What do you mean?" He asked again stupidly.
"I am going to romance the crap out of you." She grinned finally and waved happily. "Universe is finally listening to me. First awesome panties and now you - which means direct access to DVDs, monstrosity of your television, your undivided attention on me...the works."
"You missed my refrigerator." He deadpanned.
"Oh, now I will have free pass at it for as long as I wish to access." She dumped the trash in trash can and wiped oily fingers on her dress. He scowls and throws tissue box at her. She catches it expertly and pulls couple of them.
"Who did you make that deal with?" He asked standing up and pulling on his jacket. This was supposed to go down in the most romantic gesture ever known to mankind. But he began to realize that they were them. Nothing was ever normal about it.
"Anjali, Shyam and Naani. Its appalling how they continue to underestimate my intelligence." She watched him pack up for the day. It was the first time in two months he was leaving office when there was still light outside. She smiled softly at his relaxed state.
"Do I want to know what it was about?" He asked pushing her out of his office and towards her cabin outside.
"You will probably have a mini melt down if I tell you about the deals I make with people sir." She replied cheekily and grabbed her purse. "Let's go and eat some street food. My treat."
"You mean you will buy me food from the money you won by betting on me on of my abysmal dates?" He sniped at her. She threw her head back and laughed happily.
"Something like that." She said in between smiles. "Now lets get something to eat and then eat some more. Come on," she trilled.
"I am coming, I am coming. No need to get your panties in a twist." He winked.
"They don't twist anymore sir." She replied dolefully. "Don't you listen to anything I say?" She chided and launched into a rant about his inattentiveness, kittens and expensive laces.
Whatever. She didn't flinch when he catches her hand in his as he waits for his car to arrive.
'You are such a romantic goober.' His subconscious said fondly.
"I love you too not-Jarvis-voice subconscious." He thought happily.
'This is going to be a long ride.' Came the moody reply.
He just smiled at the hinted longevity by his mind and snapped back to attention to Khushi who was looking at him strangely.
"Are you spacing out on me again? Do you have someone living in your head? I have like eleven people in my head."
"Tell me about them," he said with a wan smile. She looked at him disbelievingly for a moment before launching a full fledged explanation.
He couldn't not like this for the rest of his life. Maybe Khushi was right. Things can be simple when they are made to be simple. Like saying what's on your mind. Or tuning out rubbish rants.
Sharing unhygienic food and fighting over bill. Like making silly bets and implementing seducing technique tropes borrowed from stupid movies and silly TV soaps. Maybe that's what Khushi had been doing all along.
'If not anything, your life will be an endless stream of cheap entertainment to me.' His subconscious supplies.
"Is it too soon to tell her I love her?" He asks. The sigh that comes is incredulous and the rant that follows is insulting.
He smiles again.
Life was f**king awesome.
The END. For Now. Maybe. Mostly. Probably. I guess.
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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