Today I wanted to talk about Ishwari. I am not saying what she did or doing is right nor blaming Sonakshi for everything. But when I saw her justifying herself in this way, I started to think how can a person who is otherwise kind and sensible be this way. So thought of looking at it from her perspective and this is what I feel.
The flashback where she gets slapped because Dev was playing cricket is not jus a defining moment for Dev, but is also the one which defined Ishwari. Coming from the traditional patriarchal family, after her husband's death saw Dev as the savior, as her only hope. She wanted Dev to bring them out of that state of poverty but ensure that they never would see those days. The day she got herself slapped, she took the first decision on behalf of Dev. That day Dev lost himself while Ishwari found herself. From then onwards it was Ishwari who defined the do's and don't's of Dev. Anytime Dev did the do's and it yeilded the result that she was looking for, it made her happy. But on the other hand if he did something that was a don't (like eating ice cream and falling sick), she would be very unhappy. Slowly Dev started to follow only the do's so that Ishwari wouldn't be unhappy. He started defining his happiness only by her happiness.
Ishwari on the other hand started to feel good about defining the do's and don'ts for Dev. She started believing that Dev can only be happy when he follows her do's. This I think was also reinforced by remarks from society. I mean when you see someone one else's kid listening to their mom while your own kid refuses makes you want the "good kid". In S1 it was shown how several mothers praised Dev in front of Ishwari and express a wish of wanting a son like Dev. Ishwari became convinced that what she was doing was not wrong. That what she was doing was for Dev's own good. She believed that only she knows what he wants and what makes him happy. She never saw him as more than a kid, in fact an 8 yr old kid who did not know how to make the right choices. For Ishwari Dev never grew.
Then Dev fell in love with Sonakshi. When Ishwari came to know she was surprised. She could not believe how Dev could be happy when she wasn't. So she told herself that Dev was doing one of the don'ts and this would only lead to his misery. From her perspective she thought Dev could never be happy with someone like Sonakshi. Because Sonakshi did not meet her definition of an ideal bahu. Most of the time what Ishwari had seen was Sonakshi arguing with Dev or vice versa and them fighting. How can a couple be happy when they are fighting? So Dev's decision is wrong. He needs to be protected from making a mistake(Ishwari's thought process). But she saw that Dev was really happy with his choice, his decision to marry Sonakshi. She could not really tell him the truth nor could she accept his decision. She overdosed on the pills.
When Dev and Sonakshi broke up, Ishwari genuinely thought that it was for the best. That Sonakshi was not suitable for Dev. But after the engagement fiasco and Dev's confrontation, she decided to accept his decision and asked Dev to marry Sonakshi. She herself went and got the acceptance from Sonakshi. She wanted to do everything to make Dev happy and tried to tell herself that Dev is now a grown man and should be able to make his own decision.
After the wedding whenever she saw Dev do something with Sonakshi where her happiness or her vision was not met, she became unhappy. Dev who always wanted his mom to be happy as he was accustomed to do bent over backwards to make her happy. Since Ishwari was convinced that Dev can only be happy when she was she came to the conclusion that Dev was not really happy with Sonakshi. The arguments that happened between Dev and Sonakshi reinforced her perspective. As time passed she did try to accept Sonakshi, but always felt that she was not suitable for HER DEV. She felt Sonakshi was taking him away from his dream, his desires, his wishes which was actually hers(Ishwari's). But since before Dev had never expressed having a dream or desire, Ishwari assumed that her's and Dev's dream and desires were the same. Just like how his playing cricket took him away from his responsibilities, marrying Sonakshi did the same.
When the infertility and the 5cr fiasco happened, Ishwari thought Dev had done all this because he was forced by Sonakshi. Her Dev wouldn't do such a thing to his mom. Did her Dev not know that she wanted a grandchild. Did Her Dev not know how she felt about giving his money to someone. Since all these decisions were taken by Dev without consulting her, they yielded wrong results. They did not meet the results she was looking for. Once Ishwari came to the conclusion that she must protect her Dev from Sonakshi, his bad decision.
Even now she firmly believes that all the fault is Sonakshi's and Dev's error in understanding Sonakshi. If Sonakshi had not fought with Dev or did not have any expectations from him and was ready to live as defined by Ishwari, then Dev would be happy(Ishwari's POV). Since Sonakshi demanded certain rights from Dev, Dev was miserable. Once again reaffirming her perspective that Dev and Sonakshi were not for each other. That Dev's decision was wrong and she was right.
After the breakup, when Dev blamed Ishwari as responsible, She could not understand that. How can she be wrong when she knows what's best for Dev. All the decisions that she had taken on his behalf were
right. That she knows her Dev better. Hence she holds Sonakshi responsible for everything. She thinks Dev is not happy as he is now. That his happiness lies only with her.
She will continue to hold Sonakshi responsible till the time 2 truths come out --
1) Vickky's betrayal and actions. This is very crucial to come out. It should be the whole truth I.e. Vickky and maami's hand in breaking up Dev-Sonakshi, Vickky's involvement in the business scam, his intention of killing Dev and of course their greed.
2) Suhana. When Ishwari comes to know that Dev cannot have Soha in his life because of her prenup and that Dev loses in his life because she took the decision of getting his signature, Ishwari will be forced to introspect.
Probably they will show a recreation of the scene similar to the one where Dev first realized that he loves Sonakshi after talking to his sisters. I am referring to the monologue of Dev in front of the mirror. That is when Ishwari will realize the extent of damage her interference and possessiveness caused. I am looking forward to that introspection.
I am not defending Ishwari but am trying to understand how a person who does so much wrong continue to believe that they did not do anything wrong. I also feel sorry for her because when the realization happens that she has actually harmed her son, I don't want to be in her shoes. 😛
Just my POV...
Cricket
