Originally posted by: chicksoup
Twinkle - I think she made a similar controversy last year too. The reply was all little rude, but someone needed to put her in her place too. Anyway, I have never looked up to celebrities. The pseudo feminists seem to love nitpicking on other people's choices, and often forget other people have a thought process too. They are so high on themselves, they don't deserve to know nobler thoughts. Let the frogs live in their wells.😆
On love being self seeking...no way! I know quite a few couple who love their partners unconditionally. Some of it is returned, in most cases partially, in some fully.
Parental love, yes...it is the most secure love.
Loving one's partner...it is a journey. The dynamics change everyday. It is about learning to love, despite the circumstances.
That's why I talked about my juniors...big difference when it comes to the generation before us, where love took risks. Theses days, either people fallbin love with equals or risk is taken for the filmy experience. And then when circumsrances change, it is a use and throw culture.
That is why I value tradition. Watching undinon ki baat, I know why I am like this, and unlike people 10 years younger to me. I consider myself so lucky for the upbringing, friendship, teachers...the integrity is lacking these days.
Soupster
I agree with you on the fact that the celebs seem to living in a bubble, most of them, if not all and awareness and being sensitive to the notions of the others, is a thing of the past. Plus, the revert was all but a rude awakening.
On love being self-seeking, you are contradicting your own self. You say some of it is returned partially, actually you said in most cases. Can you please bifurcate your thought process and tell me how will you define partial and total responsiveness of love? Tbh, the reciprocation of love doesnt come with a guarantee and definitely not with a verbal acceptance. Even if we go by actions, still, each generation has one partner giving more and one taking more. Agreed, that in the times we live now, the definition has changed. But saying that everything was hunky dory earlier and all is questionable now, would be wrong, grossly wrong and misjudged.
For all you know, Soupter, the bond of love, albeit being stronger earlier, had its cons. So what you see now is just a change in perspective with the fact that women, and especially Indian women, refusing to take unacceptance in the name of love now. So marriages lasted longer, together forever types, cos women were asked to adjust, more so cos it was a new family for them and with the whole deal on 'Bidaai", the bait to keep the marriage long and blissful automatically fell on the females and since they adjusted more, the marriage lasted forever. But in the society we live in today, the women has refused to bow down to the whims and fancies of the men and that has brought about a change in the dynamics, lo and behold.
And I am not saying that its only the womenfolk who have contributed to the switch, its the menfolk as well, especially cos they have become more accepting towards the needs and wants to their partners. So yes, while its a twin prong dynamic, men still remain selfish for the better part of it. And we have no one but the irrational cultural divestment of male dominated society to blame for that.
Soup, you seeing your juniors is as perspective as me, seeing my seniors. So while you see more divorces now, I have seen more separation, both physical and mental, then. And a lot attributed to the fact that, earlier divorces were a taboo or looked down upon and now they are more accepted.
I am glad you are in a fortunate space, but I still believe that the generation now is far more liberal, in real terms, and no one generation is better than the other. You think you are better off, your offsprings may think, they are better off. So whose better than whom and who decides that?
Soupster, dont get me wrong, I really respect you and your notions. Its just that this debate of love, I have every strong notions about it. I am not saying there aint love or anything. But for the fact that I write and sell the notion of 'true love', for the better part of it, its bloody over-rated, grossly undefined and sadly misjudged and misused too. People hide behind the guise of true love to pass off infidelity, heartbreak, abuse and sexual dominance as a bait and that irks me like no other. So I have come to believe that true love and love at first sight are well handled and better left behind in fiction or reel, cos in real, none is stupid and none forgiving or selfless, nowadays, to condone it as blasphemy.
PS This is one debate I have never lost and certainly dont plan to lose now. But I love the debates nonetheless. 😛
Edited by Ecrivain. - 7 years ago
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