Ganga should not have refused

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koolsadhu1000

@koolsadhu1000

Stunner

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#61

Originally posted by: sectoreight
kools,

you and I have differences of thoughts on so many subjects... I guess the only thing we agree on is that chanda's husband is smoking hot!! 🤣🤣🤣

Oh , the thought difference will continue , thats why i state 'as i see it' and leave it at that 😆😆

but about Chanda's husband being smoking hot

oh how i agree🤣

with his turban and beard he looks like Lawrence of Arabia .

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Jan50

@Jan50

Voyager

Posted: 12 years ago

#62

Self respect and pride should be put in proper perspective. People always have to bend a little bit.

I have not seen or heard of anyone who let go their pride or so called self respect at least once in their

Life time. We live in a world that is not controlled by us. Well some people are so greedy and

Shameless, that they dont have an ounce of self respect . Some people lose all their self respect

Because they are lazy and always dependent on others. Here Sanchi is an example of some one

With lot of arrogance and zero self respect. We can not put sanchi and Ganga on the same level

With respect to self respect. just because she is a girl, sanchi thinks everybody should keep her

Comfortable and showering her with gifts.

In fact Jagia was also like that after he left Gauri. The ideal thing he should have done is not come

Back to haveli. But make it on his own in Mumbai. Specially after knowing Anandi is engaged to some

One. He got kicked by his father. But still begging to be accepted. As an adult he should not

Depend on his family which he abandoned until he makes something of his own. That part

Of Jagia really hurt me. But today he is a changed man. He has grown up tremendously.

I am sure Sanchi also has that potential to change.

In case of Ganga, she accepted help with humility and not as her birth right. That should not be

Equated to lack of self respect.

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koolsadhu1000

@koolsadhu1000

Stunner

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#63

My thoughts on self respect

it is a value thats affordable or not

a value thats subjective as some give brutal survival precedence over it

a value often confused with ego .

A very dicey value .

As i see it

Anandi teaches others outside to have it but has zero at home . She stands and takes Ira or Saanchi's insults with a smile . She goes immediately next day as if nothing happened after the insult . Then it may be overhearing blatant sexist remarks or threats that if they trouble our daughter we will trouble theirs or the threat that Sumitra , ur mother , needs to hear a few things.

Saanchi knows the meaning of self respect too well . Infact she has gone a step further and turned it into ego . Not for a minute did she bother to 'understand' when she came to know Urmi Devi had blackened Shiv's name coz of Anandi's maika's doing . She makes each small issue about this ego that she confuses with self respect . Fires her family , bhabi , brothers ALL the time . She CHOOSES not to show it with Jagya . Her goal is to win the war , so being egoless and shameless is a strategy . Quite deliberate and rather clever .

Ganga is the only one who has it . Actually she cannot afford it at all , so bad r her circumstances . But being inherently born with it , it perks up and influences her decisions . It was self respect that made her bristle against Ratan Singh's treatment . It always conflicted with brutal survival . Being near Mannu . She tolerated all abuse just to be near her son . But when Jagya gave her a helping hand she took it . With Jagya there will be no other emotion except gratitude and love . Coz both have seen each other in their most emotionally vulnerable state . But when she got a whiff that even Jagya does not want her , she refused to take even the Jaipur job . Actually she could not afford to show that kind of self respect , but again , it was the inherent thing .

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sectoreight

@sectoreight

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#64

Originally posted by: Jan50

In case of Ganga, she accepted help with humility and not as her birth right. That should not be

Equated to lack of self respect.

Hi Jan,

I have no issue with ganga accepting help (with humility or without humility). I don't equate arrogance with self-respect either.

However, I do have issues with her status and the timing.

When she was completely uneducated, had no shelter, was emotionally on edge, had no financial resources ... then definitely I will not fault her for lack of self-respect. In our helplessness, we will obviously look for survival... issues of self-respect are not even ones we consider. Not everyone is the daughter of a Birla, tata, Bajaj, Mukesh Ambani etc. A woman in ganga's position HAD to take someone's help. she had big zero in every respect of her life, and she was being pursued by a murderous husband. When she left the haveli that night, then too she was completely helpless. I would not cite self-respect even in that case.

Yet, at this point, she is educated, emotionally stable, has the skill and potential to earn an income, to find a job that will give her staff quarters housing... and if even now, she insists on going back to the Jetsar hospital particularly knowing that Jagya's mother and wife-to-be don't really like her... I see that as lack of self-respect.

Even if Jagya had offered her a job, she should still have turned it down because of the twisted nature of the family circumstances. Why put Jagya in a position where he is constantly getting into fights with his family over her ?

If now she is in a position to help herself, and she still wants to go back to jagya (and the singhs by extension) then it is not nice.

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Jan50

@Jan50

Voyager

Posted: 12 years ago

#65

Well said Kools. You really spellt it out. Jagia was with lack of self respect once, but that was not

Out of a clever move but genuine helplessness. In case of Sanchi it is an art form to win the

War.

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Jan50

@Jan50

Voyager

Posted: 12 years ago

#66

Sector, ultimately that is what she did. She just lost it for some time out of excitement. We can

Grant her that much allowance. Even if she had accepted the Jaipur job, that would have been Ok also.Because she will be away from Jaitsar. Probably she also has not come to grip with her actual

Feelings for Jagia. I dont think she knew that Sumitra was against her working in the hospital.

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 12 years ago

#67

Ganga should not have contemplated to return to Jaitsar knowing well how Sumitra and Sanchi behaved with her (even if she does not consider the odd position of Jagya with her being there), and if she had self-respect, she should not even dreamed about returning to Jaitsar. When she was under- educated and was not professionally qualified and virtually dependent on Singhs for her survival, she just had to tolerate what Sumitra and Sanchi had to tell. But after becoming qualified for job, her return to Jaitsar would be at the cost of her self respect (I did not like her falling for J so soon or her living in haveli in the first place, but I will be glad if she returns to Jaitsar as wife of Jagya with the approval of haveli people). I am glad that she did not return to Jaitsar, however, refusing to go for Jaipur job was not practical. And I did not like her lie that she got job in campus placement when she was actually going to take up job that was offered by that Bala.

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sectoreight

@sectoreight

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#68

Originally posted by: Jan50
. I dont think she knew that Sumitra was against her working in the hospital.

😲😲 Jan what are you saying??

when jagya told sumi that not only was he going to educate her, but she would come back and work in the hospital after the nursing course, sumi had an explosion right in front of ganga... saying "will this nightmare called ganga be in our lives on a permanent basis?"

so ganga very well knows sumitra's feelings.

and if ganga thought that sumitra would have no objections to her working in the hospital then why was everything so hush-hush about ganga staying in the hospital quarters after leaving the haveli? They could have been very open about it.

How come ganga was skulking around and hiding behind curtains and disappearing everytime sumitra came near the hospital?

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leavesandwaves

@leavesandwaves

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#69

There are many contradictions.

Ganga refusing Jaipur offer. Is it because Jagya did not explain or because ganga wanted to go back to Jaitsar at any cost? Her hurt was caused by self respect or disappointment?

How ganga has ignored ground realities at Jaitsar and the fact that Sumitra did not send her any gifts?

Jagya did not cut her off suddenly. He did it slowly, I think. first not taking her calls, next not prolonging the conversation etc. Ganga should have thought about these things and putting two and two together, she could have easily reached the conclusion that her presence in Jaitsar will be at the cost of family peace at singhs whether they are right or wrong.

That is why I do not want Jagya marrying ganga impulsively on knowing sanchi's truth and making her suffer at sumitra's hands.Ganga should not be the last choice but she should be the real choice for jagya. It will take months, if not years to develop this love story by separating them, by Jagya thirsting for Ganga and Mannu and ganga not succumbing so easily. Intezaar ka phal meetha hota hain.

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leavesandwaves

@leavesandwaves

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#70

It is not so easy to get a job even for a trained person nowadays. Many highly qualified engineers and even doctors are unemplyod. That is why she should have accepted the Jaipur offer instead of standing on false ego. How could she so easily forget what Jagya did for her and she got so angry when he did not invite her to Jaitsar?

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