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Hello All
I am back with a proper OS this time (no rambling and no spoof đ) The 2 pictures I saw of their dance and holding hands practically thrust the pen in my hand đ
The song to go with this one is "Kitni Baatein Yaad aati hain" from Lakshya
******
Ever since he'd announced to his family that the investors had practically forced him to organize an annual party, his family had gone crazy. Everyone, including Amma and Appa had given him ideas of what the theme should be, and where the venue should be.
His Mom had told him with a grin on her face "Puttar, party jaisi bhi ho, jahaan bhi ho; meri bas ek hi hi condition hai. DJ should be Punjaabi, he should play chaar bottal vodka and there should be more than chaar bottles of vodka. Bas, apni maa ke liye itna to kar hi sakta hai na puttar?" Raman rolled his eyes at her and vowed to keep Ruhi away from his mother's influence. "Maa, aap bhi na. Ghar mein do do bacche hain." he smiled. His mother had always been one to say what she thought, the world be darned. Although he knew his mother was over-excited and trying to be cheerful for his sake, he'd played along with her.
Mrs Iyer came to Raman quietly, when his mother was busy talking to Pammi aunty on the phone "Raman beta, Thoda traditional party hona chaahiye. if you coincide it with some religious occasion, it would become a bit divine too. And please beta, no drinking OK? if your mother wants, let her mix her precious vodka in soft-drinks and bring her own bottle. We don't want everyone getting drunk no? After all, its not like a Punjabi wedding right? OK if you want, you can have non-veg in the party. I won't mind" She'd compromised her beliefs enough to allow non-veg and his mother's drinking. "OK Amma" he said. He knew that both the elder women were only trying to bring about some kind of peace to their homes.
The Iyers and Bhallas had gone on picking up pieces of their shattered lives. Emotionally, they all had been through a hurricane. All that was left to do was pick up the pieces, and rebuild everything themselves. Their only hope and prayer was that when they finished rebuilding, their life resembled the old one, as much as it could. The mothers had become friendlier. Their fights now had a quieter tone, a more decent language and ended in some unspoken understanding. Raman was thankful that they had both patched up like that. Everything was because his mother had sided with Ishita. He was thankful for that too. As much as he wished people understood his dichotomy, he was glad that Ishita wasn't alone. He was glad that she had found a real place for herself in his family. He couldn't but help remember the night when everyone in his home was against Ishita, and siding with the monster they called the son-in-law of the house. How much had changed since then! Everyone around him had now recognised the 'good' in his wife. His sister had sided with him, but he knew why that was. Simmi was hung up on Param; she supported Raman because by some twist of fate, he was standing against the one woman who had ruined Simmi's life. Raman didn't have the heart to tell Simmi that he had witnessed her husband's lecherous talks himself. He knew that he'd need to spend some time to fix his sister's life too.
When he was busy thinking about the various women in his life and witnessing everyone's performing their chores with an uneasy silence, he formed a fist and exerted self-control to not bang it on the coffee table. He had known how the aftermath would look like, but he wasn't prepared for the intensity of it. Everyone was walking on eggshells in both the homes. The only source of any talk and humour came from his mother and Amma. That was not going to be enough to fill the big void caused by his actions.
"Bhai, office nahin chalna?" Romi came up to him. Raman looked at Romi and his eyes stayed on his younger brother's face for a few moments. The change in Romi's personality was perhaps the only meaningful outcome of the last few weeks. Romi had begged for forgiveness from everyone in both the families. But he would take time to forgive himself. Because, no matter how anyone looked at it, Romi knew that his actions had resulted in Mrs Iyer's accident and the ensuing drama. And that was perhaps the only reason Romi had even an iota of sympathy for Raman. BEcause Romi thought he was indirectly responsible for his brother's plight. Raman moved when he felt his brother's hand on his shoulder "Chalo Bhai". As he drove to the office with Romi by his side, Raman asked Romi a few questions about work to keep the both of them distracted. It wasn't a surprise when he heard Romi answer the questions sincerely. Gone were the days when Romi's every answer sounded more like an excuse. He walked into office with slumped shoulders and a defeated expression. It was one of those situations where he knew what the answer was, but he didn't know how to begin writing that answer.
She'd seen everything. She'd seen her mother and Toshiji talk to him about the party. She'd seen him become sad when he found out that Ruhi went to school before he had a chance to wish her a good day. She'd seen him look for her. She'd seen him relax when Amma spoke to him softly. That's when she smiled for the first time in many days. She wanted them to be nice to him. She knew how both the families were rallying to support her. She knew they were finding it hard to forgive his actions. She didn't want anyone to hold him responsible. He had done everything for the right reasons, and everyone appreciated what he'd done for his son. They were mad at him because he'd betrayed her. That was Ishita's problem with their behaviour. The only person Raman had really wronged was her, so it should have been only upto her to decide and mete out his punishment, and eventually forgive him. She was genuinely heart-broken that in a time when he was devastated, he really didn't have anyone, not even his own mother. She went to the two mothers and thanked them for taking the effort. That gesture is all it took to melt Toshiji once more.
A few days ago, Ishita had sat down both the ladies and explained to them why it was wrong of them to stay mad at Raman. She had told them that she was glad they were behind her, but this was her battle. This was her marriage, and that man who wronged her was her husband. The son, brother and father in him were not wrong; Just the husband. So there was no reason for anyone else to be mad at him. Her mothers had relented only when she promised them that she wouldn't fall weak and forget what happened and mistake that for forgiveness. She wouldn't be that naive.
She didn't have to sit down her daughter and tell her anything. Ruhi had known that she'd have to live through her parents' fight and that they would make up in the end. She was also intelligent enough to know that it would take more time this time. She'd asked Ishita intuitively "Ishima, what can I do to help you stop the fight with papa?" She was sure Ruhi would have asked Raman the same question. Ishita also knew Raman well enough to know that he wouldn't use their daughter to mend their relationship. She sighed when she thought about the battles she was facing. One against him, to punish him for his betrayal. The second battle was worse. It was against her own heart, her heart wanted to make sure it wasn't punished along with Raman. She walked into the clinic with a defeated expression too, her shoulders though, weren't as slumped as Raman's.
The evening of the party came soon enough. Raman had entrusted the planning of the party to Mihir and Mihika. He wasn't in a frame of mind to do anything cheerful. It had officially been more than a week now since she'd spoken to him. She'd fed him, taken care of his clothes, even charged his phone and laptop when he'd nodded off to sleep a couple of days ago. She'd slept in the same bed with him with Ruhi between them. She'd done everything except look into his eyes and talk to him. They conversed through Ruhi most of the times, and the family for the rest. All their logistical problems about who'd drop Ruhi, and who'd pick her up were all sorted via text messages. For the first time in his marriage, Raman thought his matrimony was indeed a deal. Devoid of all emotions but still perfectly functioning.
It wasn't that he wasn't trying. But he was careful and slow. He didn't want to rush into anything with his repentance. He had messed up big and he didn't want her to think he was taking it lightly. While driving to the party venue alone in his car, he was reminded of the childish things he'd done to avoid saying Sorry directly. All those mistakes and all that repentance seemed like movie scenes now. Gone were the days of buying gifts and making dosas. He was going to start by talking to her. Till he had her talking to him, forgiveness wouldn't come. That was the single reason he was looking forward to the dance today. He knew that she'd have to be with him for some time, and may be even talk to him, at least to keep up appearances in front of his staff. He wanted a sign from above, that's all, something to say that she was listening and was willing to talk.
Ishita wasn't prepared to wear that saree, but Ruhi wouldn't budge. She did not want to wear blue and send him any wrong signal. She had chosen a black saree with golden embroidery on it, but Ruhi was threatening to not come to the party. "Ishima, I know you are not wearing this because its blue and its papa's favourite colour and you are still fighting with him. But you wont stop looking at blue skies na? Your clinic coat is also blue, will you stop wearing that?" Ishita didnt know if it was Ruhi's innocence or shrewdness that was asking those questions. She did have some of her father's wittiness, even at the young age. She wore Ruhi's choice with a look of displeasure on her face, but mentally thankful that it wasn't all blue. The mother and daughter walked hand in hand into the party, and Ruhi screamed "Ishima's its all so pretty... and See papa is there, he looks dashing in red".
The next couple of hours went by in some silence and separation. There were times when they had to stand next to each other and make small-talk with others. People who'd met her asked her questions about how she'd been. And the people who'd never met her asked her the usual introductory questions. To be fair, both of them didn't look like they were in a fight. They just looked like two sad people, beautiful and sad. The DJ's announcement interrupted their small gathering. Raman and Ishita weren't prepared for this. They didn't know there was going to be a slow dance. Both of them looked at Mihir and Mihika who just made sorry faces. They didn't know what the DJ had planned either. Toshiji came to their rescue "Koi nahin, tum dono mere aur Madhu ke saaath baitho. Koi poocchega to bolna tabiyat theek nahin hai Ishita ki. People never question a young woman's fake illness." Before they could go to the table, one of the investors came to Raman and practically pushed them onto the dance floor. She didn't even have a chance to use her mother-in-law's suggestion for an excuse.
The dance lasted 10 minutes, but felt like a life-time to both of them. They didn't have a problem with the actual dance, they didn't even realise they were actually dancing quite beautifully. There were some couples on the floor who had stopped their own dance to look at Raman and Ishita. She still did not talk to him, but she had to look into his eyes. If she danced with her head down, it would look too obvious. The only other option to avoid his eyes would be to put her head on his shoulder. But that would send a bigger wrong signal than the blue saree. So she decided to look at him after all.
Both of them danced to the music, adding words to it using their eyes. He saw the hurt, anger, disappointment, regret, heart-break and even a tinge of disgust. She saw the helplessness, the guilt, the scare, shame, the pleading, the expectation. It took all the will power for the both of them to not cry in front of the strangers. They bore it like real warriors in a battle and waited for the music to stop and the applause to begin. The show would soon be over.
Everyone was too dazed to see the two young children walk upto the DJ and place a peck on his cheeks and thank him for the song and the announcement. "I told you" Shravan said. "Yes Shravu, you were right. But you see, my idea will also work. I will tell you tomorrow in school ok?" the youngest Bhalla said and they shook hands like friends in a business partnership.
Raman and Ishita were too emotionally-drained to think about anything else that night. They'd gone through the motions of changing into their night clothes. She was wearing the same green one that she seemed to wear whenever she couldn't sleep. She was wearing that one quite frequently in the recent past. Ruhi slept between them quietly, not asking for a bed-time story that night. The last thought the both of them had before dozing off was that they'd spent 10 mins in silence and taken that first step forward, although it was forced. What they did not think about was the unflinching familiarity their bodies seemed to have while dancing. They didn't know when their child woke up and ran off to her grand-parents' room.
The rare monsoon sun woke them up and they saw each other's faces close enough to be touching, and their hands actually touching. People say that the few seconds right after you wake up, and before you remember all the disappointments of life, they feel like heaven. That is all the time it took for them to wish each other a "Good Morning".
"Don't turn away. Keep your gaze on the bandaged place. That's where the light enters you." - Rumi
****** So, how was it???
For those who read my separation saga, there is a dance story in there too. So if some of this story feels familiar, please do excuse me. My inspiration and energy were rusted during this track.
AND
I just may continue this story into a healing/redemption track if I have enough material from the show. Let me know if you are up for it !
I am back with a proper OS this time (no rambling and no spoof đ) The 2 pictures I saw of their dance and holding hands practically thrust the pen in my hand đ
The song to go with this one is "Kitni Baatein Yaad aati hain" from Lakshya
******
Ever since he'd announced to his family that the investors had practically forced him to organize an annual party, his family had gone crazy. Everyone, including Amma and Appa had given him ideas of what the theme should be, and where the venue should be.
His Mom had told him with a grin on her face "Puttar, party jaisi bhi ho, jahaan bhi ho; meri bas ek hi hi condition hai. DJ should be Punjaabi, he should play chaar bottal vodka and there should be more than chaar bottles of vodka. Bas, apni maa ke liye itna to kar hi sakta hai na puttar?" Raman rolled his eyes at her and vowed to keep Ruhi away from his mother's influence. "Maa, aap bhi na. Ghar mein do do bacche hain." he smiled. His mother had always been one to say what she thought, the world be darned. Although he knew his mother was over-excited and trying to be cheerful for his sake, he'd played along with her.
Mrs Iyer came to Raman quietly, when his mother was busy talking to Pammi aunty on the phone "Raman beta, Thoda traditional party hona chaahiye. if you coincide it with some religious occasion, it would become a bit divine too. And please beta, no drinking OK? if your mother wants, let her mix her precious vodka in soft-drinks and bring her own bottle. We don't want everyone getting drunk no? After all, its not like a Punjabi wedding right? OK if you want, you can have non-veg in the party. I won't mind" She'd compromised her beliefs enough to allow non-veg and his mother's drinking. "OK Amma" he said. He knew that both the elder women were only trying to bring about some kind of peace to their homes.
The Iyers and Bhallas had gone on picking up pieces of their shattered lives. Emotionally, they all had been through a hurricane. All that was left to do was pick up the pieces, and rebuild everything themselves. Their only hope and prayer was that when they finished rebuilding, their life resembled the old one, as much as it could. The mothers had become friendlier. Their fights now had a quieter tone, a more decent language and ended in some unspoken understanding. Raman was thankful that they had both patched up like that. Everything was because his mother had sided with Ishita. He was thankful for that too. As much as he wished people understood his dichotomy, he was glad that Ishita wasn't alone. He was glad that she had found a real place for herself in his family. He couldn't but help remember the night when everyone in his home was against Ishita, and siding with the monster they called the son-in-law of the house. How much had changed since then! Everyone around him had now recognised the 'good' in his wife. His sister had sided with him, but he knew why that was. Simmi was hung up on Param; she supported Raman because by some twist of fate, he was standing against the one woman who had ruined Simmi's life. Raman didn't have the heart to tell Simmi that he had witnessed her husband's lecherous talks himself. He knew that he'd need to spend some time to fix his sister's life too.
When he was busy thinking about the various women in his life and witnessing everyone's performing their chores with an uneasy silence, he formed a fist and exerted self-control to not bang it on the coffee table. He had known how the aftermath would look like, but he wasn't prepared for the intensity of it. Everyone was walking on eggshells in both the homes. The only source of any talk and humour came from his mother and Amma. That was not going to be enough to fill the big void caused by his actions.
"Bhai, office nahin chalna?" Romi came up to him. Raman looked at Romi and his eyes stayed on his younger brother's face for a few moments. The change in Romi's personality was perhaps the only meaningful outcome of the last few weeks. Romi had begged for forgiveness from everyone in both the families. But he would take time to forgive himself. Because, no matter how anyone looked at it, Romi knew that his actions had resulted in Mrs Iyer's accident and the ensuing drama. And that was perhaps the only reason Romi had even an iota of sympathy for Raman. BEcause Romi thought he was indirectly responsible for his brother's plight. Raman moved when he felt his brother's hand on his shoulder "Chalo Bhai". As he drove to the office with Romi by his side, Raman asked Romi a few questions about work to keep the both of them distracted. It wasn't a surprise when he heard Romi answer the questions sincerely. Gone were the days when Romi's every answer sounded more like an excuse. He walked into office with slumped shoulders and a defeated expression. It was one of those situations where he knew what the answer was, but he didn't know how to begin writing that answer.
She'd seen everything. She'd seen her mother and Toshiji talk to him about the party. She'd seen him become sad when he found out that Ruhi went to school before he had a chance to wish her a good day. She'd seen him look for her. She'd seen him relax when Amma spoke to him softly. That's when she smiled for the first time in many days. She wanted them to be nice to him. She knew how both the families were rallying to support her. She knew they were finding it hard to forgive his actions. She didn't want anyone to hold him responsible. He had done everything for the right reasons, and everyone appreciated what he'd done for his son. They were mad at him because he'd betrayed her. That was Ishita's problem with their behaviour. The only person Raman had really wronged was her, so it should have been only upto her to decide and mete out his punishment, and eventually forgive him. She was genuinely heart-broken that in a time when he was devastated, he really didn't have anyone, not even his own mother. She went to the two mothers and thanked them for taking the effort. That gesture is all it took to melt Toshiji once more.
A few days ago, Ishita had sat down both the ladies and explained to them why it was wrong of them to stay mad at Raman. She had told them that she was glad they were behind her, but this was her battle. This was her marriage, and that man who wronged her was her husband. The son, brother and father in him were not wrong; Just the husband. So there was no reason for anyone else to be mad at him. Her mothers had relented only when she promised them that she wouldn't fall weak and forget what happened and mistake that for forgiveness. She wouldn't be that naive.
She didn't have to sit down her daughter and tell her anything. Ruhi had known that she'd have to live through her parents' fight and that they would make up in the end. She was also intelligent enough to know that it would take more time this time. She'd asked Ishita intuitively "Ishima, what can I do to help you stop the fight with papa?" She was sure Ruhi would have asked Raman the same question. Ishita also knew Raman well enough to know that he wouldn't use their daughter to mend their relationship. She sighed when she thought about the battles she was facing. One against him, to punish him for his betrayal. The second battle was worse. It was against her own heart, her heart wanted to make sure it wasn't punished along with Raman. She walked into the clinic with a defeated expression too, her shoulders though, weren't as slumped as Raman's.
The evening of the party came soon enough. Raman had entrusted the planning of the party to Mihir and Mihika. He wasn't in a frame of mind to do anything cheerful. It had officially been more than a week now since she'd spoken to him. She'd fed him, taken care of his clothes, even charged his phone and laptop when he'd nodded off to sleep a couple of days ago. She'd slept in the same bed with him with Ruhi between them. She'd done everything except look into his eyes and talk to him. They conversed through Ruhi most of the times, and the family for the rest. All their logistical problems about who'd drop Ruhi, and who'd pick her up were all sorted via text messages. For the first time in his marriage, Raman thought his matrimony was indeed a deal. Devoid of all emotions but still perfectly functioning.
It wasn't that he wasn't trying. But he was careful and slow. He didn't want to rush into anything with his repentance. He had messed up big and he didn't want her to think he was taking it lightly. While driving to the party venue alone in his car, he was reminded of the childish things he'd done to avoid saying Sorry directly. All those mistakes and all that repentance seemed like movie scenes now. Gone were the days of buying gifts and making dosas. He was going to start by talking to her. Till he had her talking to him, forgiveness wouldn't come. That was the single reason he was looking forward to the dance today. He knew that she'd have to be with him for some time, and may be even talk to him, at least to keep up appearances in front of his staff. He wanted a sign from above, that's all, something to say that she was listening and was willing to talk.
Ishita wasn't prepared to wear that saree, but Ruhi wouldn't budge. She did not want to wear blue and send him any wrong signal. She had chosen a black saree with golden embroidery on it, but Ruhi was threatening to not come to the party. "Ishima, I know you are not wearing this because its blue and its papa's favourite colour and you are still fighting with him. But you wont stop looking at blue skies na? Your clinic coat is also blue, will you stop wearing that?" Ishita didnt know if it was Ruhi's innocence or shrewdness that was asking those questions. She did have some of her father's wittiness, even at the young age. She wore Ruhi's choice with a look of displeasure on her face, but mentally thankful that it wasn't all blue. The mother and daughter walked hand in hand into the party, and Ruhi screamed "Ishima's its all so pretty... and See papa is there, he looks dashing in red".
The next couple of hours went by in some silence and separation. There were times when they had to stand next to each other and make small-talk with others. People who'd met her asked her questions about how she'd been. And the people who'd never met her asked her the usual introductory questions. To be fair, both of them didn't look like they were in a fight. They just looked like two sad people, beautiful and sad. The DJ's announcement interrupted their small gathering. Raman and Ishita weren't prepared for this. They didn't know there was going to be a slow dance. Both of them looked at Mihir and Mihika who just made sorry faces. They didn't know what the DJ had planned either. Toshiji came to their rescue "Koi nahin, tum dono mere aur Madhu ke saaath baitho. Koi poocchega to bolna tabiyat theek nahin hai Ishita ki. People never question a young woman's fake illness." Before they could go to the table, one of the investors came to Raman and practically pushed them onto the dance floor. She didn't even have a chance to use her mother-in-law's suggestion for an excuse.
The dance lasted 10 minutes, but felt like a life-time to both of them. They didn't have a problem with the actual dance, they didn't even realise they were actually dancing quite beautifully. There were some couples on the floor who had stopped their own dance to look at Raman and Ishita. She still did not talk to him, but she had to look into his eyes. If she danced with her head down, it would look too obvious. The only other option to avoid his eyes would be to put her head on his shoulder. But that would send a bigger wrong signal than the blue saree. So she decided to look at him after all.
Both of them danced to the music, adding words to it using their eyes. He saw the hurt, anger, disappointment, regret, heart-break and even a tinge of disgust. She saw the helplessness, the guilt, the scare, shame, the pleading, the expectation. It took all the will power for the both of them to not cry in front of the strangers. They bore it like real warriors in a battle and waited for the music to stop and the applause to begin. The show would soon be over.
Everyone was too dazed to see the two young children walk upto the DJ and place a peck on his cheeks and thank him for the song and the announcement. "I told you" Shravan said. "Yes Shravu, you were right. But you see, my idea will also work. I will tell you tomorrow in school ok?" the youngest Bhalla said and they shook hands like friends in a business partnership.
Raman and Ishita were too emotionally-drained to think about anything else that night. They'd gone through the motions of changing into their night clothes. She was wearing the same green one that she seemed to wear whenever she couldn't sleep. She was wearing that one quite frequently in the recent past. Ruhi slept between them quietly, not asking for a bed-time story that night. The last thought the both of them had before dozing off was that they'd spent 10 mins in silence and taken that first step forward, although it was forced. What they did not think about was the unflinching familiarity their bodies seemed to have while dancing. They didn't know when their child woke up and ran off to her grand-parents' room.
The rare monsoon sun woke them up and they saw each other's faces close enough to be touching, and their hands actually touching. People say that the few seconds right after you wake up, and before you remember all the disappointments of life, they feel like heaven. That is all the time it took for them to wish each other a "Good Morning".
"Don't turn away. Keep your gaze on the bandaged place. That's where the light enters you." - Rumi
****** So, how was it???
For those who read my separation saga, there is a dance story in there too. So if some of this story feels familiar, please do excuse me. My inspiration and energy were rusted during this track.
AND
I just may continue this story into a healing/redemption track if I have enough material from the show. Let me know if you are up for it !
Arjun
