Posted:
One thing that I don't understand from the posts in this forum is that Nandani is viewed as this shrewd woman that no one should be allowed to forgive or understand her pain. And if we do feel bad for her, we are seen as showing sympathy (like its a bad thing) instead of the fair judgement we put on her because of the struggles she has faced. Her behaviors are seen as good vs bad instead of on a continuum, like any other human behavior. Part of being human is that there is room to grow and you're allowed to make mistakes and the whole world doesn't have to treat you as a criminal if you do a few things that aren't labeled perfect.
Yes, she is having an affair with a married man. Yes, you should criticize her for that. BUT ONLY THAT. Nothing else. In this forum, people have taken to make posts comparing her actions with Rajdeep's action and they are, without realizing the implications of their words, saying what Nandani is doing is worse than what Rajdeep did/is doing. Let me tell you something. When you say that a victim is just like the perpetrator because she did ONE thing that he he did, in this scenario, that makes you a rape and domestic abuse apologist. I feel for Mauli, I really really do, however, don't you dare compare Nandani's actions to rajdeeps actions. Even tho they both did ONE thing that was similar (well actually you should compare Rajdeep and Kunal's actions here since it was the men that slept with someone outside of their marriage), doesn't mean that the comparison should be made. It's not as black and white as that.The behavior wasn't driven with the same thoughts in mind. I know y'all hate women, which is pretty obvious from the amount of posts blaming Nandani instead of or more than Kunal but come on. Also, I don't agree with the notion that Nandani is a woman and she should think twice about hurting another woman and blah blah blah, I'm sorry that you're putting women's actions on a damn pedestal all the time that if something goes wrong, one misstep, and it's the end of the damn world.
More importantly, the implications made by people that we were only shown Nandani's abuse was to justify the EMA or to gain sympathy from the viewers when Nandani does fall in love with Kunal is so wrong. You all are acting like what Nandani did was so abhorrent and so terrible and she can't be forgiven no matter what is not a great mindset. Nandani didn't rape anyone, she didn't kill anyone, and putting her in the same standard as someone who did do those vile things is unfair. Everyone knows of the trauma that Nandani went through for years and it hasn't even been started to get resolved. They keep saying she's depressed but like can the show do something about that? Just because you take a few steps to move on with your life, doesn't mean you're set and never regress and take a few steps back. With things like this, you need time and support, and resources to move on. And then when she was taking steps to move on from her old life, she fell in love with the wrong person. Person who is giving her love and support. How many posts in this forum talk about Kunal 's incessant need to "save" Nandini? He is not the one with the trauma and years of mental abuse, he is the one that initiated everything. Nandani was leaving the city and Kunal stopped her. Kunal is not even getting half the backlash Nandani is getting. It is sexist. You guys are being very very impatient and not letting the story unfold before you come with 5 million reasons why Nandani should not be allowed to live her life, so much as so that she should die?
The words used to describe Nandani is actually so disgusting. SO many people are not even critically thinking why Nandani would betray Mauli, all they can think is that she should not have done it. The whole point of the show was to show that these things happen. Like I implied before, you can't judge people at face value. There are layers. People are part of their environment. They have context and it should be considered before you say awful things about them.
I don't know how many times I've said this but if the writers knew how to write a woman who is escaping the kind of life Nandani is trying to escape from, then we wouldn't have this conversation. Nandani wanted a man who understood her, and unfortunately it was her best friends husband. When she realizes this, she leaves the house, plans to leave the city and comes the shitty asshole and tells her not to because he is so in love with her. Of course, she goes to him. Of course Mauli is not the first thing that comes to her mind because more than anything, a supportive, loving husband is what she has wanted all her life. It's sad that the flair of Indian TV shows was added with mentions of divine intervention or whatever but the fact remains that whatever is happenning with Nandani is still part of her traumatic episode. She is still being manipulated and now in the name of love instead of hatred so it's less apparent to Nandani and viewers. Her feelings are displaced and she even said recently that she wanted both love and friend.
You don't have to love Nandani, heck you don't even have to like her, but it is important that you not bash and berate and belittle her every chance you get. If she doesn't feel guilty, there's an uproar. If she does feel guilty, y'all make fun or her anxiety and depression (her shivers, the tears) and say that it's not enough. Guilt, like other emotions manifests in different ways. Just because Nandani doesn't react to certain things or reacts in ways that you don't understand or like, doesn't mean she's not feeling guilty. And while we are at her anxiety, I have seen exactly 0 posts criticizing Mauli for forcing her to dance at the competition. I was so angry because when you are as anxious as Nandani, and you put on the pressure of dancing in front of people and on top of that Mauli wanted Nandani to win the competition? Yeah no I didn't agree with that. Point is so many characters are flawed here but blame is always on Nandani. She is the one everyone is pointing the finger at. Enough is enough!
Veer Hanuman
Anupamaa
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
