Unres-ed..
When someone writes about Rudra.. or about Paro.. our mind combines what we read, with what we already know of these characters.
We all watch the show ardently and are so connected to these two..
We know what they look like, we can imagine them in the scenario the writer chooses to put them in, we can feel their emotions with relative ease.
But Nandini..
We know nothing of her.. except that she has vanished sarhad-paar a year ago.
There is no face that we can put to this name...
I randomly mention her in OS-es as Paro's childhood companion, then forget about her.
We had only your words to rely on...and you did not disappoint for a single moment..
With your poignant use of language, you conjured vivid images of a hapless, innocent, village girl - scared and confused at first, balking at the thought of selling her body, trying to escape, calling for help.. and then you showed us how she gradually, changed into a hardened, unemotional woman, benumbed by the situation she finds herself in, resigned to her fate.
She may have been helpless and lost at first. But she learned to take care of herself and of the two other girls. She will do what she has to, to survive.
She is so impassive and cold now - that jail bores her, instead of scaring her.
She turns to cards and beedi to distract herself.
All of this was so well expressed in the below lines.
..all that concerned her was not the mirage of rescue, but the reality of avoiding punishment.
The boredom of getting lined up against a wall, getting barked at, spit on, then fingerprinted at the local station had been quite irritating..
...left inside the lock-up for two entire days, without even a pack of cards or any beedis or paan to relieve the monotony.
The way you described the creepy, contaminated, forsaken interiors of the brothel had me shuddering at the thought that such a place should exist on the face of the same planet where we live. My skin crawled to read the way the girls were manhandled in that place.
And the disgust.
Human beings are selfish by nature. They mostly find it hard to even accept that they are wrong.
Self-disgust is a very difficult emotion to feel.
And yet, you admirably portrayed her feelings, her revulsion at her own self - so much so that I cringed, tamping down an urge to weep, as my heart went out to Nandini.
Her physically scrubbing away at her skin, in an attempt to rid herself of the grime is in vain as she feels unclean deep inside..
She is finally free, but her soul has been imprisoned in the dank confines of the kotha and she is left with nothing but disgust at what she has become.
I wondered why there was no Paro in this update.
But then I thought, given Nandini's current state of mind, the poor girl may not have been able to selflessly dredge up joy at Paro's good fortune...her loving, handsome, brave, BSD officer husband.
So it was best that she did not confront Paro, it would have caused more heartache.
The dark, damp underground room - the womb-like environs, where Nandini felt safe, cocooned from the world that she was once a part of...where she had been reborn...amazing metaphor.
The below parts just stood out for me...such skillful use of words Navin-sa. Loved it.
That lilting accent brought to her mind the image of topaz hills, of sandstorms and thunder, vast empty miles and free eagles soaring the endless horizons of her home.
She drifted, a small speck of dirt in a large sea of new experiences.
..until the water ran pink with her raw, abraded skin.
She was the Nandini who had not come to the sound of her own name.
I am an escapist by nature.. I prefer to avoid the harsh realities of life as they disturb me too much.
But I wouldn't have missed this for the world...it is one of the most moving pieces that I have come across in a long time..
This is an incredibly brilliant start to the Navarasa series and like Niyoti said, I hope that this high standard of writing, urges all other writers to put their best foot forward.
Lots of love,
Maya
PS: I hope that I did not push someone to Page 2 with the length of my comment.
Apologies in advance!
Edited by What_the - 11 years ago
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Mannat Har Khushi Paane Ki
