How stupid can this get?:Mod note pg19 - Page 19

Originally posted by: pallavi25

If you read all the other posts u would understand why I said that. Purvi has been even called a S***...which I cannot digest. I wonder why so much hatred for a character, makes me suspect that perhaps its for the actress herself since her appearance is also ridiculed many times. I make fun of her wigs sometimes but not her face, and not of her Bengali style saris (which is a cultural thing as u know but EVEN THAT HAS been ridiculed by Ovi fans)...also her face and expressions have been ridiculed. Kind of suspicious to me...

Well, again girls with questionable moral values are called names in Indian that translate to S***, wh***. Many members here aren't sitting to sugarcoat when they are criticize a character or the storyline. But, why are you taking it personally, Ovi has been called many names at many times too. From the time she came between Arvi is has been called names like spoilt brat, an assortment of animal names, psycho, witch etc. etc. (I am forgetting a few now)...you can name it. She has also been criticized for her facial expressions, that she looks ugly while crying, her voice, her weight etc, etc. Even Savita in the PR1 was called many many names and is even called names now. Naming calling has happened for Archana, Manav, Shravani, MAnjusha, Rasika...actually everyone. Just because you like AN that translated to Purvi, you probably are taking it unnecessarily personally. Well, I am hoping the actress isn't called such names. Hopefully members have that sense to differentiate the actress from the character. I know I can. Many members who frequent KC are all too qualified to think or rather would be offended if you think that they are bashing the actors. When ppl criticise, the hope is that Cv (who do frequent here), will take clue and change. Like Purvi wearing saree bengali style was changed recently. It happens all the time. Besides, the fun is being a judge commenting on the story and enjoying while doing so. It create a sense of community, a shared topic for conversation and also learning from each other's story, mistakes etc.. While I agree that no one can be totally objective during their commenting/criticism (for members are influenced by their personal perception too) ' but assuming that the intentions are bad than what they are trying to convey is only creating an environment of mistrust that isn't going to be healthy at all for a forum like IF. At this rate, any comment you make against Ovi could be construed as being directed towards the actress. You wouldn't like that, could you? Me for one, do think that members generally come here just to active participate in an active discussion...for Ekta does provide that for us all 😃

Now, let see the other side of the coin. Let say a member do not like Shruti at all and is directing all her wrath against Ovi... it is an underhand way to get to the actress. Even if it happens- then what? Does Shruti really care? Probably not. Will she ever know? Probably Not. Does these criticisms help orhurt her? I actually think it does help her. First it is better to be criticized even negatively than be ignored. For, it means, she is doing something that is affecting her audience, her customer. Besides, if she is smart, she will take it positively and try improving on them. See, it is a double winner here. Besides, one can hardly expect that all audience will like all actors equally. Not even Big B, SRK can claim that all their audience loves them. I think, the much more important question for an actor to worry about is if the audience becomes indifferent to him/her. That will probably spell doom for him. If a new actress is ignored that is like a dead bell to them. No one will than care enough for them to offer the next role, the next job. In fact, an actor has the hardest job...that of entertaining, and if he does that and gets no response in return...that is definitely bad news to him. No, criticism in whatever form is good, it is much better than to be ignored in my opinion, for it means that the actress is successful in getting his audience worked up, he wants that to be successful, in my opinion.

Acceptance is the main issue here, not abundance...please dont extend it that way...its not like everybody is having babies out of wedlock. But yes, it does happen and its shown in so many movies, people go and see these movies.

I wonder how Bollywood movies show so much sinful things happening but nobody objects. Those things are shocking even for me...yet audience goes and watches them with grinning faces and acceptance. When they show premarital sex and live-in relationships in Hindi movies, do u go and watch them? What do u feel abt them? Did they show such openness in our times? NOOO...so what is it? Has society become bolder or more conservative than our times? In our times, they didnt have kissing scenes, no item dances, no swimsuits or vulgar dances...but they did show unwed pregnancies because thats a reality of life.

Well, because audience are watching it, it doesn't mean that they are all accepting what is being shown. They watch and make judgments about it. I wasn't allowed to watch many movies when I was growing up, obviously, my parenst were making a judgment call. Watching a movie doesn't automatically equal to accepting that is shown. But, if the audience don't experience something how will they know if they like it or not. You taste a certain wine and decide if yu like it or not. Sometimes, hearing what a driug addict goes through might be preventive enough for someone - but then surely, some will try it out. At the end, it does becomes what a person learns seeing somethng or by experiencing it. Also for movies, audience acceptance can be measured by its box-office gains...

Well done, Waneeka my dear!

This is what is called bringing a matter down flat on all fours!😉

Shyamala Aunty

Originally posted by: ilovedhanjanird

I don't know what the debate is here all about
But I wouldn't want my daughter to have pre marital sex and have an illegitimate child with the husband of my other daughter , regardless of who was supposed to be married to whom

i saw some posts regarding dressing...i am still not sure how dressing can predict people thinking or education or broad-minded...

just in the small view of PR...Purvi character exposes so much in traditional attire than Ovi character in Modern attire...

SHyamala I precisely remember the case in OH and a 5 yrs young girl's rape case recently in delhi-india..

Thanks Janhvi, that clears up practically everything, and I see that most of my queries arose from my wrongly taking 'parents' to be the parents of the 17 year old mother.

She was really very lucky in her parents, especially since she seems to have had no regrets about it all, and maybe it was not an accident at all, but a deliberate pregnancy. That sort of thing is awful, not in moral terms, for that is relative, but in the sense that no 17 year old should have a child. She is not equipped to handle one, and her life is legshackled to the baby from the word go.

It can be much worse. There is no control over teenagers at all there, by their parents or by anyone else. When I was the Deputy Chief of Mission in Washington in the mid-1990s, there was a Washington Post report about a 16 year old who was expecting her second child, and the first was 2 years old! What can one say to that? And they talk of child marriages in India!

In England, I have read reports that young girls have a child, of course out of wedlock, in order to get a Council allotted house! The way in which the boys who father these kids treat the mothers is often unbelievably coarse, and they boast to their fellows about how many such girls they have 'scored' with. It makes my skin crawl. This 17 year old you write about seems to have been lucky also in having a decent boyfriend.

What it all amounts to is that in many parts of the West, this so-called modernity and liberalisation for women has only resulted in many of them being even more openly degraded than even in the most conservative countries - do take a look, even if it makes you feel sick, at my post above on the Steubenville horror of August 2012 - and in the men not according them any of the conventional respect that was taken for granted under the code of behaviour till the 1960s. This is not advancement. I look back at what a lovely time I had at a co-ed college in small town Maharashtra, and I feel very sorry for young girls these days in many parts of the world.

Shyamala

Originally posted by: soapwatcher1

Responses in red.

Originally posted by: pari87

rayadallie, I would not mock a woman if she was not a hypocrite about it. That said and done, i wonder how many women here felt sympathy with Ovi when her sister and fiance decided to get married while she was committing suicide..ermm, I guess people called her psycho?

nobody sympathised with her when she lost her baby...in fact people wanted her baby to turn out to be romil's so that she would be equal to purvi in the pre-marital sex nonsense...

So yeah, when yard sticks are different for women on this forum itself, it is hogwash to talk about big things like changing mindsets in society...wish people learnt their own lessons here first!

A woman is a woman, if she makes a mistake, pays for it and then asks for forgiveness, everyone should look at her the same way right? So If ovi has paid for her mistake, lost a child, lft the husband so he is free to re-unite with whoever, people still call her psycho, want her dead, or whatever...no sympathy for her eh? But purvi bichari has got people singing lories of society and education and being broad minded...

Ahh well, women are a woman;s worst enemy as pallavi said, so true! :P

@Bold you are passing judgement in purvi, isn't it?

No one called Ovi Physco for wanting to commit suicide, it was overacting to situations that caused people to say she need help as she is behaving like a physco. Ovi should have been smart enough as a girl who grew up in canada to know that it was not worth fighting for a man who is not in love with you.Being friends with someone since childhood does not give you the right over him in love and marriage. She should have walked away like she did now. Sorry to say that its too late now as so many lives were destroyed. I dont want to go down the line of justifying all what happened as I think we exhausted every single point over the past few mths.

What do you mean that no one symphatised with her for loosing her baby, I do not recall reading a post on this forum where someone celebrate the death of Ovi's baby. What I saw is that they including myself says that she is getting a dose of her won medicine in relation to all that has happened.

It was just a prediction by forum members of the way in which the story went that maybe Ovi's baby is romil because we all never see any romance between arjun and ovi and then all of a sudden she is pregnant. However, the story took a turn the other way as we are not the writers. It was not to equate ovi and purvi as they are two very different persons all together and fans wanted to see purvi and arjun unite.

@red, I wont bother to waste my time to respond as ...

Originally posted by: ilovedhanjanird

I don't know what the debate is here all about
But I wouldn't want my daughter to have pre marital sex and have an illegitimate child with the husband of my other daughter , regardless of who was supposed to be married to whom

My dear, no parent wish such for their daughter but what I can say to you is that we make our children but not their minds. They have a mind of their own and no matter what sanskars you teach them and how much you watch over them, if they choose a certain path then there is nothing you can do but to emphatise and lend your support. After all is your child.

In purvi's case she was brought up with archanna's supposed good sanskars but fell into a trap which I think is understandable as she and arjun was going to get married the next day. But she did not foresee her loving sister Ovi coming to her with a deal for THEIR parents happiness. I personally think she made the right decision to give her child life than aborting it. Let God be her judge, I wont.

Originally posted by: rayadallie

My dear, no parent wish such for their daughter but what I can say to you is that we make our children but not their minds. They have a mind of their own and no matter what sanskars you teach them and how much you watch over them, if they choose a certain path then there is nothing you can do but to emphatise and lend your support. After all is your child.

In purvi's case she was brought up with archanna's supposed good sanskars but fell into a trap which I think is understandable as she and arjun was going to get married the next day. But she did not foresee her loving sister Ovi coming to her with a deal for THEIR parents happiness. I personally think she made the right decision to give her child life than aborting it. Let God be her judge, I wont.