Ripped Apart... (Maaneet) part 18 updated - Page 81

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Posted: 14 years ago

Originally posted by: sweet coco

oh no! No update....me sad!!! That's ok tomorrow is gonna be epic...an update and the OSCARS!!! YIPPEEEE!!!!



aww... hun will post the update by tonight (IST) and i hope you enjoy the same😃


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Posted: 14 years ago
Thanks dear😳
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Posted: 14 years ago
Thanks a ton buddies... Now before we get to the part... I would like to wish all my honeybuns who are preparing for their exams... All the Best Sweets👍🏼
Here goes the next part... hope you like all like it... do leave your generous comments😃
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Part 16

Back to present

I don't know if I ever lived,

But I know I had seen a dream

To love and to be loved

Was all that I had wished

I didn't worry in the face of a storm

For I knew you would hold me

Keeping me by your side

I knew you would shield me

But then the catastrophe struck

And all I had was slipped away

Desperate I reached for you

Alas, you were gone too

Clinging to your memories

The memoirs of my beautiful dream

I wish, Oh how I wish

That you were somehow true!

Scribbling down the lines, she shut her notebook and then closed her eyes as she leaned behind on the headboard. It had been a month since she had landed in Mumbai... a month had passed by since she had seen him. Pammi Masi would always say time heals the sorest of all the wounds but each passing day she found herself pinning for him a little more if than before if that was even possible. Time and again she imagined, Mohinder whispering, "Hausla nahi haarte beta"… she felt Rano stroking her forehead. She had felt him engulfing her in his arms… soothing her… assuring her that this was all a nightmare… it wasn't really happening… that she just needed to open her eyes and this would all vanish… But all that vanished were her illusions… There hadn't been a single day, when she had not woken up wondering what she was doing here at her Maasi's place, why she wasn't in her bed in her room, in her house in Delhi. Wondering if it was getting late, why hasn't Rano come yet to wake her up. She still waited for her phone to ring when she knew, she no more had it with her… At times she would call her place in Delhi, half expecting Rano or Mohinder to answer the call, asking her to come back soon… telling her that they were missing her… but none of it happened and the jolts of actuality always came crashing down on her... No one missed her in Delhi… no wanted her back… Bearing it all there was one thing she didn't allow herself to do. She never took his name… never let anyone know about him… she knew she won't be able to take his name and not break down.

She still woke up at night shrieking… and Pammi would always hold her and coax her… Adi would stand by her side… But thankfully no one mentioned a thing about it the next day. Pinky never gave up trying to stuff her mouth with food she otherwise barely touched. She was genuinely touched by their gestures but still her heart remained aloof.

Standing on the doorway, Pammi watched Geet and felt a lump forming in her throat. She was desperate to get the old Geet back but felt helpless. Rano and Mohinder's sudden demise had been over-bearing and painful but it was Geet's sorrow that was shredding her heart. The girl was killing herself everyday little by little… and she, her Pammi Masi could do nothing more than be a mute spectator to all this. "Meri bachchi ne toh kabhi kissi ka bura nahi kiya… phir uske saath yeh kyun? Meri Geet ki zindagi ki khushiyan lauta do Babaji… Lauta do" she prayed with all her heart and soul.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Yeh kab tak chalega Adi? Kab tak woh ghar pe aise hi bethi rahegi? She hardly comes out of her room… kisi se baat nahi karti… kahin aati jaati nahi… its not right… its just not right for her… I'm scared she's falling into depression" Pinky urged. "Jaanta hu Pinky… lekin main karu kya? The more we are trying to pull her out, the more she's retreating in her shell" Adi said running a frustrated hand in his hair… placing a hand on his shoulder, "Talk to her" she suggested empathetically.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

"Anu, Maan ko samajhne ki koshish kijiye… its almost a month now aur aap ab bhi unse baat karne ke liye raazi nahi hai… Geet ki wajah se woh pehle hi itne pareshaan hai" Savitri tried reasoning out with Anu. "Geet ki wajah se nahi dadi ma… apne gusse ki wajah se… Geet ko aap bhi jaanti hai na… Maan Veerji kehte hain ki Geet ne unhe dhoka diya… how am I suppose to believe that Dadi ma… Geet Veerji ke liye kya feel karti thi yeh maine dekha hai… I was the one she confided in and let the secrets of her heart out… I was the one she shared her fears and insecurities with… I was the one who would check on Veerji on her insistence when they would fight and he would refuse to speak to her… do you know how many crazy hours she would spend just looking at her phone to hear Veerji's voice whenever he was not in town… Uska woh pagalpan maine dekha hai Dadi ma… aur yeh Maan Veerji bhi jaante hain… phir woh kaise ek hi din main Geet par se apna bharosa khone de sakte hai? Anu was agitated by the time she finished. "Agar aisa hai toh woh hain kahan? Aap gayi thi unke ghar do din pehle bhi… aapke emails ka koi jawab diya unhone? Ek phone tak kiya?" dadi Ma countered back…

"Issi baat ki toh mujhe fikar hai Dadi Ma… this is so not like her… pata nahi woh kahan hai… kaisi hai? Aur Uncle –Aunty woh kahan hai? Woh kyun ghar nahi aaye… Uncle ka phone have been disconnected too… I just hope… just hope that she's fine" Anu voiced out her worriesmore to herself than to Dadi ma…

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

"Veerji aap… Koi kaam tha?" Geet asked Adi as he walked inside her room. "Kyun bina kissi kaam ke main tujhse milne nahi aa sakta" Adi asked, not knowing where to begin the conversation from. "Nahi Veerji aisa kyun bol rahe ho? Boliye" Geet politely said. "Aage kuch socha hai?" Geet looked up at Adi… "Matlab Veerji?" Adi sighed, "Geet, I know whatever happened has been too much for anyone to bear… (Geet looked away) Nahi Geet… you can't run away from life now… can you? I'm proud of you for not accepting the defeat… for fighting back… lekin phir ab kyun? Why are you accepting defeat now?" Adi asked Geet in a voice laced with concern and desperation. Geet shook her head… "Mujhe nahi pata Veerji… I don't know what should I do?" Geet ignored the reference to her ordeal and answered the first question he had asked. Adi stroked her hair lovingly and said, "There are so many things beta… well to begin with you can start spending some time outside the house… go for walks… re-establish your contacts… talk to your friends… there are a few very good clubs here… you can take membership in any of them, meet new people, make new friends, start afresh… or you could opt for any course you would like to do" Adi smiled as he laid out possibilies for her to choose from. Not as to appear rude, Geet smiled a little. "I'll think about it Veerji" she replied. Placing a hand on her cheek, Adi said, "theek hai… but just remember one thing Geet neither Mausa ji nor Masi ji would have been happy to see you loosing yourself… (then getting up) Raat bohut ho gayi hai… so ja… Good night" Geet just nodded as Adi left.

Adi's words kept ringing in her ears. He was right, her Bauji had always urged her to make something out of her life… he hated it if she ever gave up… that's what his last wish had been that she would fight… that she will not give up… As Adi's suggestion of starting afresh rang in her ears, she wondered if that was ever possible. Would she be ever able to get go of her past in the first place… to let go of him… and her thoughts drifted back to the day when the very first sign of her future ordeal had caused a subtle ripple in her calm life.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Flashback

"Whoa amazing! Main pichle do saalon se tujhe invitations de rahi hu but you always had your excuses aur ab Veerji ne kaha toh madam has no qualms for coming to the party." Anu complained over the phone not letting Geet speak at all.

"Anu… Invitation kisi ka bhi ho Birthday toh tera hai na" Geet tried cajoling her. "Maske mat laga" Anu chided and cut the call. Looking at the phone she glared, "Hey baba ji in dono bhai-behan ke beech kahan phasa diya aapne mujhe?" she muttered under her breath as she once again turned her attention back to the gift articles in the Archie's Gallery. On her way back home, she had stopped at Archie's to buy something for Anu. It was her birthday tomorrow. The reason behind the party at Khurana Mansion. Once she finished, she stepped out of the gallery when she walked into him… she walked into Brij... Something in his eyes always sent chill down her spine and it was no different today. He kept looking at her grimly.

Maan had been a little occupied in the office with some blueprints and so she had left alone. He had been unwilling but then she assured him that she would be fine on her own and would call him once she reached home. Only then, had he relented. But suddenly, Geet was now wary of that idea.

It was getting late in the evening. She was dressed in a sleeveless kurti and leggings but not in a typical dupatta suit. Mohinder and Rano had never restricted her from wearing the casual stuff girls of her age wore. "Kahan se aa rahi hai?" he asked as he disapprovingly eyed her from top to bottom. Clutching the gift she was holding in front of her as if trying to shield herself she replied, "office se" her fear of this man she had occasionally seen was starting to show. "Raat ho rahi hai… achche ghar ki ladkiyan is waqt teri tarah raaston pe nahi bhatakti" he said seething. Despite her fear, Geet felt the urge to slap him hard for the way he sounded. Who was he to dictate terms to her in the first place?

Biting back her fear, she mustered her courage as she glared at him. "Ma Bauji mera wait kar rahe honge… aapko jo baat karni hai unse kijiye" and started to walk past him when he held her by her wrist and looked at her furiously, "Mujhse aise baat karne ki himmat kaise ki tune?" he was fuming and Geet tried to wriggle to free her hand. "Haath chodiye" she said but he tightened his grip till it really started hurting her. "Please… mujhe dard ho raha hai" she said as she tried to loosen his grip with her other hand. Her fear was back in place as she looked at him pleading to leave her. As she looked around and decided to ask for help, a guy came upto them and politely asked her, "Is there a problem ma'am?" Teary-eyed she nodded in Brij's direction looking too disturbed and embarrassed at the incident. She wished Maan was with her right now.

"Haath chodo" she heard the stranger saying, looking at Brij. "Oye… yeh humare ghar ka mamla hai… ja tu yahan se" Brij hissed at the guy and increased the pressure on Geet's hand. "Ahh" Geet winced and the next moment Brij stumbled back with the impact of the sudden blow that landed right on his face. Shocked, Geet looked on for a second, but in the very next instant made a run for her home. She heard the stranger call her from behind but she didn't look back. For some reason she was too scared to say anything. She could feel a burning sensation on her wrist due to the impact of Brij's grip.

When she reached home, she threw herself in Rano's arms and told her everything that transpired. Mohinder was furious and assured her that he'll take care of things while Rano looked worried.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Later that night, "Woh zameen aap de dijiye unhe… humare paas jo bhi hai, humari Geet ke liye kafi hai… agar aaj Brij ne usse kuch bata diya hota toh" Rano said all in one go. Taking a deep breath, "Rano woh zameen meri hoti toh kab ka de chukka hota lekin woh Kuljeet ki thi, Geet ke pita ki… uska kya karna hai yeh waqt aane pe Geet decide karegi main nahi…" Rano turned to him again, "Lekin aaj jo hua…" she trailed fearing to voice her concerns but Mohinder answered, "woh dobara nahi hoga… do din baad hum jab hoshiarpur jayenge tab main Daarji se baat karunga is baare main… but remember, Geet ko pata nahi chalna chahiye ki hum Hoshiarpur ja rahe hain warna woh zidd karegi" he added with finality.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Back to present

Geet shivered at the memory of that incident. Never in her wildest dreams had she imagined that this one small incident would turn out to be the first distend of her troubles.

But then Adi was right… she just can't keep herself locked in this room… could she fail her parents like that? No! She decided she would speak to Adi the first thing in the morning.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

In his room, Maan was reading through some reports. It had been a month but he couldn't find solace in anything he did. Where and how long was he going to run from himself? He knew what Anu wanted from him… but how could he subject himself to that pain again… only he knew what he went through when he saw her seated beside other man at her wedding. It killed him. How could he subject himself to that torture again… Anu wanted him to go and find out about her… but how could he do it? Did he have that much strength to see her living those dreams that he had spun for them with someone else? Anu said she might be in some trouble and if that was true then why didn't she tell him about it? He smirked, it was all her cruel joke… a cruel joke that she played on him… Anu too will realize it one day… he was sure about that.

He wondered how people wear such perfect masks on their faces…

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Flashback

It was Anu's birthday, the birthday of princess Khurana! The mansion was bustling with activity for the evening party. Nandita and Dadi Ma threw orders making the servants run helter-skelter fixing up the decorations.

"Happy Birthday Bachchi" Maan wished Anu lovingly as she woke up from her sleep. "Thanks Veerji" Anu hugged Maan happily. "Lazy bones! Get up… Mom and Dadi Ma are waiting for you… you need to go to the temple with them" Maan said… "Hmm… sure… i'll get ready but aap kahan ja rahe ho" she asked as she looked at him dressed for office. "Office main thoda kaam hai… but I promise I'll be back soon" Anu made a face and then said, "ok… but don't forget your promise… (then thinking something) and make sure your madam doesn't change her mind about the party… I tell you she is capable of being such a spoil sport!" Maan rolled his eyes and left before.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

As usual, Mohinder dropped her to office. She was walking to her desk when Maan pulled her inside his cabin. "Ouch… Maan... kya kar rahe ho aap?" she asked a little taken aback but he looked at her severely, "I told you to call me once you reach… but you didn't… uske baad tumhara cell bhi off tha… do you know how worried I was?" Geet's thoughts at once wandered to the evening before but she didn't find it right to alarm Maan about it and so smiling a little, she said, "Haan woh… actually… I wasn't feeling too good… isiliye dhyan nahi raha and then I went to sleep early… sorry aap meri wajah se itna pareshan ho gaye"… Maan shook his head as his anger melted giving rise to his concern, "You weren't well? Geet why are you in office then… tumhe aaram karna chahiye tha… chalo main abhi tumhe ghar drop kar deta hoon" he tried to lead her out but she stopped him, "Maan… aap bhi na ainve hi parehsaan ho rahe ho… it was just usual my sinusitis. I'm perfectly fine now" calming down a bit, "you sure?" he asked. Smiling politely at his concern she nodded in yes and he kissed her forehead before heading back to her desk.

Khurana mansion bathed in the golden lights from huge chandeliers and artistic lamps. Exotic flowers and ribbons in purple and white added a classy look to the dcor… Uniformed staff roamed around the room serving the guests. While men flocked to the bar… the socialites from Delhi's elite club chatted and caught up with each other as they sipped on their drinks. Nandita and Dadi ma went around welcoming their guests as Naintara who had come especially for this party with Dev looked around the room, looking bored and irritated. Dev stood with Viren meeting their associates discussing business, market trends and stocks over their glasses.

In her room, Anu gave a final look to her attire and smiled in contentment. She was dressed in knee length deep blue dress paired up with long earings, a diamond bracelet and heels. "Perfect" she muttered to herself as she gave a final touch to her gloss… "More than perfect" she heard someone say as the door of her room snapped shut. She spun around at once and as she took in the person standing before her, the initial shock was replaced by huge smile as she sprung in his direction and called out his name, "Arjun" but then strightenedherself right in front of him. "Tum toh Veer ji ke birthday pe aane wale the?" she asked pouting. Arjun smiled and leaning in towards her said, "Haan… lekin phir Veerji ki is behan ka birthday beech main aa gaya… how could I miss that?" Smiling widely, she threw her arms around him. Smiling, Arjun hugged her back and whispered, "Happy Birthday Love".

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

"Geet, party shuru ho chuki hai… kahan ho tum?" Maan asked over the phone as he looked around the room that was scurrying with the guests and just then he heard Dadi Ma call out, "Geet" and he whipped around in the direction of the voice. As he then followed Dadi Ma's sight, he stood rooted in place. As he drank in her sight, his heart skipped a beat. Dressed in a thin strapped, white Anarkali kurta with light silver work and churidar with her duppata thrown causally around her neck she made a magnificent sight. Her silky hair, left open, danced at her thin waistline. Delicate dangling earings, adorned her ears while bangles settled on her wrists. The heels she wore complimented her attire. Her kajal accentuated the beauty of her big brown eyes and he noticed the shimmer of her gloss as she smiled at Dadi ma who was nearing her by now. He watched her in awe watching the two ladies exchanging pleasantries. As he admired her, he couldn't help but notice that this simplicity and beauty had managed to turn quite a heads in the party. He felt his heart swell at the knowledge that she belonged to him and only him. That she was his Geet! And at the same time when he read the admiration for her in other men's eyes, a sudden surge of jealousy ran through him and he wished he could hide her from everyone else.

And then he saw Dadi Ma patting her cheeks before she moved towards the staircase. However, before she climbed the stairs she passed a fleeting glance at him and smiled causing his insides to churn. And suddenly the desire to hold her in his arms surpassed all his senses and involuntarily he took a step in her direction but just then Viren called him.

Geet had caught his sight the minute she had entered the room and had gasped. She needed to keep a check on herself before going to greet this Greek God of a man dressed in black blazers. All the while as she chatted with Dadi Ma, she felt his eyes on her. And when she proceeded to meet Anu, she couldn't help looking at him once before rushing off to Anu's room.

Standing at the corner, Naintara was witnessing the whole scene unfold. Dadi Ma had come to have a small talk with her but when she spotted Geet, she at once left her side smiling at this new entrant in the party. As Dadi Ma's eyes had drifted towards Maan, it had caught Naintara's attention too and she didn't miss the look in Maan's eyes as he looked at this female… Geet!

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

"Happy Birthday to you… Happy Birthday dearest Anu..." Geet sang as she entered Anu's room and was taken aback when she saw Anu in someone's arms. Arjun and Anu immediately parted seeing Geet while Geet shifted her glance off of them slightly embarrassed. However, Anu wasn't perturbed. She glided towards Geet happily and said, "Thank you so much… Gosh you look stunning…" she added looking at her from top to bottom. "Thanks" Geet muttered and handed her the gift and gestured towards the guy in the room asking her who he was. Anu hugged her and whispered, "Kaha tha na tujhe usse milwaongi". Geet's eyes widened in surprise as she understood the meaning behind Anu's words. She remembered the conversation she had with Anu's a few days back when Anu had mistaken her for someone else and on much insistence had told her that she'll tell her everything one day. Before she could let her thoughts ponder more, Anu pulled her towards the guy and introduced him as Arjun. The guy smiled at her and that's when she recognized him to be the same stranger who had helped her on the street yesterday when Brij had cornered her. "Aap?" Geet said as familiarity dawned on her. Anu who was trying to open the gift paused as she looked at the other two in surprise. "You guys know each other?" she asked confused.

Before Geet or Arjun could answer, "Arjun?" Maan's voice broke through as he walked in. "Hey Maan" Arjun greeted him in a friendly manner. "Tum kab aaye?" Maan asked him. "Bas abhi… socha pehle birthday girl ko wish kar loon before I join you guys in the party… warna tumhari behan mujhe maar dalti" Anu smacked Arjun's arm while the duo chuckled. "shut up Arjun (and then turning to Geet) Geet, papa and Arjun's dad have been very good friend ever since I remember... Lekin tu Arjun ko kaise jaanti hai" Anu asked. Maan too was surprised to know that Geet and Arjun were acquaintances and he turned towards Geet. Geet's voice faltered as she searched for words, "woh… actually…. Umm… I just met him yesterday… woh…" Understanding her discomfort Arjun spoke, "Koi inhe kal sadak par pareshan kar raha tha… maine bas inki thodi si madat kar di (turning to Geet) I hope he didn't hurt you coz you just ran away" Maan was instantly alarmed as he turned to look at Geet while Anu looked concerned. Avoiding his look Geet replied, "Nahi main theek hu… Thanks by the way for the help yesterday. It was absolutely discourteous of me to just run away like that. I'm sorry" she added with a smile as she remembered. "Koi baat nahi. I figured that you were scared" Arjun said smiling at her as Maan kept looking at her gravely.

One of the servants came by and informed Anu that Viren had called her downstairs. As Anu and Arjun made their way downstairs… Maan held Geet back and locked the door. Then turning towards her and holding her by her shoulders, "Meri taraf Dekho Geet" he demanded. Glancing over at Maan, Geet bit her lip as she anticipated what was coming her way. She knew he was angry and so before he could say anything, she spoke, "main theek hu Maan… I didn't want to bother you". Maan tightened his hold over her shoulders at her statement. "Stop it! Will you? You need to get a few things straight Geet… It's not possible for me to not bother about you… How many times have I got to explain it to you that everything about you is connected to me and affects me… agar koi tumhe pareshaan karta hai… tang karta hai… toh I need to know this… Kaun tha woh?" he asked as his dark eyes bore into hers. He was angry… very angry and she could see that… his anger scared her but since her Bauji had said he would take care of the matter, she didn't think it was necessary for Maan to know about Brij and what would she say about Brij anyways. He was a family acquaint. What could she say? "Do you know him?" he shook her shoulder and asked again. Geet shook her head in no. "Did he hurt you?" he asked again and she shook her head once more and Maan pulled in her his embrace.

After a while they separated and overwhelmed by his concern and protectiveness for her, Geet placed her hand on his left cheek and rising on her toes she kissed him on his other cheek. Maan's eyes twinkled as Geet's gaze shifted towards the ground as she blushed. Maan shook his head at her. He couldn't stay angry with her for long even he wished.

Finally with his hands around her waist, he whispered, "Never hide anything from me Geet. Tum apni baatein mujhse chupao, yeh main kabhi tolerate nahi kar sakta. Tumhari koi baat mujhe koi aur aakar bataye yeh mujhe manzoor nahi hai" he said as he refered to the fact that Arjun told him about the incident and not she herself. Geet nodded in agreement and then there was a knock on the door… "Veerji darwaza kholiye warna main dadi ma ko bulaoungi" Anu threatened from the other side of the door. Reluctantly letting go off Geet, he opened the door to see a frowning Anu standing in the doorway with her stands on her waist. She then pushed him aside and grabbing hold of Geet's arm pulled her along side as she said without turning back, "Dadi Ma cake kaatne ke liye neeche bula rahi hai… aana ho toh aa jaiye main Geet ko le ja rahi hu"

Maan squinted his eyes at his sister's retreating form who had managed to claim Geet and had dragged her away. He grumbled… if he needed to have a few moments with Geet this evening, he would have to dodge his own sister!

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Ok. So now tell me how was it?😃
Luv, Sonia
Audiwalia thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
U know wat past nd present r equally getting interesting..... In present i want to meet nd in past i want to know wat went wrong....
euphoric thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago

Originally posted by: myedward12

very nice update.......

thanks dear
glad you enjoyed😃
euphoric thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago

Originally posted by: aditiwalia56

U know wat past nd present r equally getting interesting..... In present i want to meet nd in past i want to know wat went wrong....

Hey Aditi...
Thanks buddy... thts wat i m trying to do... maintain a balance between past and present😃
Water. thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
It was amazingly brillant.
Loved it
Thank you...thank you for such a longggggggggggg update.
Loved it...very much.
Thank you so very much.
I loved how u showed Geet's emotions.
I love how maan's sister stands up for her...
Maan wants to go find her..but does not believe in her anymore...that made me sad😭😭
Hopefully he finds out the truth soon.
Adi n Pinky r too sweet.
seemamary thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago
very nice update but want to see maaneet together in the present track maan should gind out wat actually went wrong with geet.plssssssssssssssssss update soon.
euphoric thumbnail
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Posted: 14 years ago

Originally posted by: Water.

It was amazingly brillant.

Loved it
Thank you...thank you for such a longggggggggggg update.
Loved it...very much.
Thank you so very much.
I loved how u showed Geet's emotions.
I love how maan's sister stands up for her...
Maan wants to go find her..but does not believe in her anymore...that made me sad😭😭
Hopefully he finds out the truth soon.
Adi n Pinky r too sweet.

Thanks a ton dearie😃
I'm humbled and the pleasure is all mine....
glad you liked the characterization and i know Maan's part is a bit sad for him not trusting Geet... but things would sort in the end... no worries about that
I hope you keep enjoying😳
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Posted: 14 years ago

Originally posted by: seemamary

very nice update but want to see maaneet together in the present track maan should gind out wat actually went wrong with geet.plssssssssssssssssss update soon.

Hey Seema😃
Thanks sweetie... thoda sa wait then Maan and Geet will meet in the present track too and gradually thr MUs would be sorted😳

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From the author's desk : Welcome to thread 6! I started to write this story years ago when the show was live and now when I look back on what...

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