Raghvi SS - Aa raha hoon main zindagi - all parts page 1

Note :-

I have written this story long time ago and now I have changed name wih Raghav and Pallavi.

This is not love story but life story. Read at your risk.

Part 1

Aa raha hoon main zindagi

I will be at peace and happy and no more pain. Only one moment this pain is for sometimes and I will be away from this. Whenever I will open my I will be in new world.

I slowly slowly open my eyes and try to recognised where am I and what is happening with me? I saw unknown face around me. they were in white cloth. I wonder where I am or they are on my funeral or I am in heaven and suddenly I feel pain but dead people don't feel pain that means I am still alive? I was gaining my senses and open my eyes slowly slowly and try to find where am I? those faces are unknown to me. I tried to look more carefully and I realised I am in hospital and they are treating me and it was injection because of that I was feeling pain. I am still alive I should be happy but no I am not happy. I don't want to live anymore why god why are you so cruel with me. You already snatch my happiness than why are you still want to hurt me more? why do you hate me so much? I closed my eyes and tears roll down from my eyes and I was remembering Whatever happend with me last week. my whole world is destroy. why only me why?

I realised someone touched my shoulder and I came out from my dream world no sorry nightmare dream. there was my aayi whose face looks pale and eyes were swolen. it seems she cried for whole night and my baba was standing behind my aayi his condition was also not less. I felt guilt for hurting them but it was not for long period and guilt replaced by anger.

I gathered all courage and energy and shouted on them why did they save me and I don't want to live anymore. Aayi was trying to console me and baba too but I was not in mood to listen to them and told them to leave me alone. I just want to stay alone. I was angry on them why did they save me? I don't want to live anymore. I want to died.

Outside my parents were crying and inside I was crying and I didn't know 2 pairs of eyes were watching this.

It was night time. Everyone was sleeping but I was awake and all memories were haunting me. I can't live like this. I will try one more time. I look around me and my aayi was sleeping but her face was still pale and my father was another side. both tried to talk to me and try to cheering me but I was ignoring them.

I left room silently so no one wake up with noise. I slowly slowly reach towards terrace due to weakness and pain but this is for sometime only after that no more pain. I was on roof top near water tank and about to jump I heard someone voice.

voice: so are you committing murder?

I was scare listening unknown voice and I saw that direction and one guy was standing there folding his hand and grin was on his face and looking at me question mark?

who the hell are you and what are you doing here at this time? I question him.

his reply irritate me

voice: look who is talking? I can ask same question to you but I wont because I know why are you here. (winking at me) i am not liable to answer your questions but I will answer. answer one I am Raghav Rao answer two I never see murder and suicide in my life so I am here experience that. bada maza aata hoga na (he said excited and I was shocked with his answer)

Btw you carry on i won't disturb. I want to witness murder.

I was shocked with his answer. what murder? whose murder? excuse me i am not here to murder anyone but for... i stopped before saying any word. what if he will complained before I jump. Excuse me that's none of your business that what I do here and what not?

Raghav: lol I am not here to stop you. you carryon

I was going ahead and was about to jump I heard his voice again

Raghav: in my life I am going to witness murder first time

I was like what murder whose murder?

Raghav: well you accept it or not but you are committing murder of 3 persons. first you will kill yourself and looking you dead body your parents will died may be not physically but emotionally so you are committing 3 murder.

Excuse me you don't have any right to stop me and comment like this and they are my parents and I have all right to do anything with this life. I snapped at him and his face worth watching. I was feeling happy inside because I felt I won whole world. after that incident this is first time I actually felt happy from my heart

Raghav: hold on hold on hold on when did I stop you? please go ahead. actually I want to feel how it feels when people kill themselves. you can carry on with your great work. I will not say any word

I was about to leave when he again stop me

Raghav: wait let me record this thrilling action of yours? so I can show this to your parents. they will be really happy and proud of you looking at their brave daughter stunt.

I stopped at that hearing those words. is he right?

I was two minder after hearing those words. I didn't realised that I am hurting my parents too and what will happen after I will die? I am only child of their? but my other mind was encouraging me to jump. Even if living I won't be happy and will die inside and looking at me like that my parents will also die inside so better I killed myself. they will cry for once and move on. end everything in one yes you are right I thought and went ahead but again he stopped me?

Raghav: sorry to disturb you again but can u tell me reason of this great achievement so I can publicise that too

that was limit of my patience. I shouted on him why the hell are you stopping me again and again. it's not easy to do this for me but it's way better than to live like dead person instead of dying everyday. just in one week my whole world is change. my whole life is destroyed my dreams are broken just within one week.

Raghav: aisa kya hua? exam me fail ho gayi(i didnt reply) maa baap se fight huyi (again no reply) pyar me dhokha (i look at him and he understood) Ohh so yeh baat hain. good good go ahead you are right your life is totally destroyed. you don't have any future anymore. so what your parents will suffer but you will be at peace? that guy must be know but still didn't show his face and came to meet you and must be enjoying somewhere and your parents deserve this because they love you care for you and worry for you. this love and care for that person who is so busy thinking that person who left Her and hurting those who are with her in this situation. you go you deserve death not life. I won't give you lecture but just want to say one thing think once before jumping that who is important that person who left you without caring about you or those person who are with you? life is your and choice too.

Raghav turn his face other side angrily

i was dumbfounded after hearing that. i didntt hink that way and only think about my pain my sorrow but not my parents happiness and their love and care towards me. Raghav is right I don't have right to live I should died. I was going edge of rooftop.

i was expecting he will again disturb me but this time I look at towards him but he was not there he left . i turned my face and before jumping i close my eyes and i saw only my parents faces and my whole life came as a flashback on those few seconds and i remember those words which was said by Raghav few minutes ago

I sighed and took a deep breath and this time I walked two steps back and came down because I know who are important for me right now. so what I am sad but I wont allow my parents to died like this because of me.

I went back to my room where my parents were searching for me and I saw relief on their eyes when they show me. they were so scared and worry for me and I was feeling more guilty. I hugged aayi tightly and relax her that I am here only i wont be go anywhere now and later i hugged my baba. I slept on bed and I insist aayi to slept beside me. I hugged aayi tightly and she was patting my back and baba hand on my head. he was caressing my hair and try to made me sleep. I was feeling at peace and I don't know when I slept. from last one week this is first time i slept peacefully.

part 2

I was trying to behave normal infront of my parents so they won't feel hurt and sad because of me. I was trying hard to hide my pain infront of my parents. it has been 2nd day in hospital I was still weak due to loss of blood but I was recovering fast so doctor will shift me to general ward.

my parents were happy to see me happy and recovering fast.

so it's time to shift to new place. Ohhh I am so exciting (in sarcastic way). when I shifted there was one bad beside me but it was empty and I felt relief. no one is there so I will feel relax and can cry in night when my parents will be sleeping. it's not easy to be a fake happy for whole day. sometimes it feels frustrating. I was in deep thought and I realised someone has came to that bed and I look towards that person and I was shock to see him there. Ohhh god not again. gayi meri tanhayi paani me. he will irritate me alot Now. as I said he will start to irritate me and its started and he called me and start to talk to me like He is my long lasting friend.

Raghav: what madam U didn't completed ur adventure in yesterday night? I missed such a golden opportunity

I was about to shut him up my parents came and sat beside me. here also he started to poke his nose and started to talk to my aayi baba and he started to joke and talk like a known person. my parents were also impress with him. Even my mom offered him food and he ate everyt thing and there was nothing left for me. he was eating and praising aayi and Aayi baba so much engross with him they didn't realised that I am also there. I was feeling jealous of him. I am only child of them so I never face such type of situation. always get there attention. I was feeling hurt and I was fuming and cursing that guy who is snatching my parents from me. I tried my best to get their attention but they didn't listen me and I kept quite and I was angry on them and suddenlystrike me something. I remeber those days when I used to ignore my parents for mandar my love errmmm I mean my ex love (ouch it hurts) i fought with them many time for him. I remembered those time when I used to forget that I have parents too whenever I spend my time with mandar. ignoring their call and their advice and whatever they used to tell me. they must be feeling hurt more than what I am feeling right now. shhit I was so wrong and I did so wrong thing with my parents. how can I be so insensitive that to with my parents. I don't have right to be angry with them it's there right but they never get angry with that's why they are parents. I again look at towards my parents and instead of feeling jealous I was feeling happy to watching them happy.

it was night time. I force my parents to go at home. I don't want them to stay in hospital otherwise they will also ill and moreover I want to stay alone for sometimes. after lots of efforts they were ready with the condition that they will come early in morning.

after they left I was feeling lonely and guilty. lonely due to loosing mandar and guilty for hurting my parents. I was feeling suffocated so I left that bed and went near to window for fresh air. I was breathing heavily only to give life to myself and want throw away all burden.

I closed my eyes and past came to haunted me.

I was in 8th standard and I was very scholar students. at that time Mandar was new student. due to late admission he missed many lectures and notes. being brilliant student teacher told me to help him in studies. by teaching him I don't know when started to learn love study. by the time me and mandar came close and we were inseparable best friends many used to teased us as a couple but I always denied though inside I know I was falling for him. I never like whenever girls used close to him. it's only me who has right to go to close to him no one else. I was getting possessive about him and he also started to like that. when we entered in 10th he proposed me infront of my friends. first I was shocked but later i agreed. I didn't accepted this from him but I was happiest person on this earth. we were coming close to each other. I was so engrossed with him i lost my concentration from my studies started to ignore my friends and parents. I got less percentage compare to my expectations. I always interested in science but for mandar I took admission in commerce my parents were not happy with my decision. they tried to make me understand and remind me my dream but I fought with them.

things were going smoothly till 2nd year of degree college. there was new girl in our college nisha. She was beautiful and every guy was lattoo over her. I was sure mandar loves me a lot and he will never ever look at her but I was wrong. there was project and nisha mandar and I were in same project. I was not happy with her entry between us but mandar oppose me and we started project together. he started to made fun of me infront of nisha and told how am I over possessive about him. he started to ignore me and spend time with her. he started to get irritate with me and fought with me without any reason and when I confront him he told me he is irritated with my over possessive nature and he needs space which I am not giving him and he said it was infatuation not love. One day we had huge fight and I ask him about him and nisha closeness because he started ignore me and lied to me. whenever I made plan either he include nisha or only both of them went together. Even if i am with them mandar behave like I am not there. I was feeling suffocated and neglected. after fight he finally confessed he has fallen for nisha and he started to hate my over possessive nature and he feels suffocated in this relationship and he broke up with me. my whole life was shattered. I tried to call him but he ignore my call. whenever I try to meet him in college he was always with nisha and ignore me. I was so hurt and sad due to his behaviour I could not believe my mandar can do that. that day in college I was searching him in college for last try from my side to save our relationship and my broken heart but I didn't know instead of saving my whole world is shatter. I saw nisha and mandar in compromising position. I was blank and don't know what todo. I was feeling cheated. my trust on mandar broken my dreams with him broken I was broken. after coming to my senses I shouted on him and slap him but he told me he didn't get those pleasure in our relationship which he was getting with nisha and he insulted me made fun of my relationship and feeling.

it was Last stroke and I ran away from there and I was upset and depressed and fought with my parents shouted on them. After that day didn't attend college and one day when I was alone in my room I took drastic step and I cut my vein with that hope there won't be anymore pain and Iwill be in peace tears were rolling down from eyes and i know Raghav was also there and looking at me but right now I just want to cry.

I was wiping my tear but he stopped me

Raghav: let cry in once and let it go that pain instead of crying in instalment because instalments are with interest.

Pallavi: it's easy to say but hard to follow

Raghav: yes hard to follow but it's not impossible

Pallavi: for me it's impossible and not easy to let go. I lost my love with whom I saw dream of my whole life

Raghav: but you have parents

Pallavi: yeah that's why I am still alive otherwise

Raghav: atleast you can try

I didn't react to him and I left towards my bed and cover my head with blanket and I was sobbing whole night till my parents came. next day I also have to start fake happiness with my parents by hiding my pain

Raghav was observing everything and I don't know he will take that step that will change my whole perspective and life

part 3

I was sleeping till late because of I slept late due to crying but I realized someone was waking me up.

Voice : Pallu Pallu wake up pallu its morning pallu

Pallavi : please baba let me sleep

Voice came near to my ears

Voice : pallu wake up pallu

Hold on its not my baba's voice. He is not him than who is waking me up. I open my eyes and saw him and slap my head yes its him Raghav. He will not allow me to leave happily I mean sadly.

Pallavi : why don't you mind your own business ?let me sleep

Raghav : I am minding my own business and its you. My business is to wake you up

Pallavi : me ? how ?

Raghav : (excitedly) because today we are going on picnic

Pallavi : picnic? what picnic? hello we are in hospital and patient how can we go on picnic. Even if we are going for picnic I will never ever come with you there got it so leave me alone

Raghav : well that's your bad luck we are going to picnic together and I took permission from your aayi baba both (I was shocked to hear that) if you still doubt see your parents are coming here you can ask them

Baba : arre pallu you are still not ready. Be ready for picnic.

Pallavi : but baba

Aayi : no excuse pallu be ready we are leaving for some work so Raghav will take you to picnic

I have no other option but have to accept because of my parents words I cant understand how can they leave me with this guy like this. I was ready but in hospital costumes only god knows where will we go for picnic and how can hospital allow such type of activity and this guy Raghav should be in mental asylum not here.

Raghav : if you done cursing me so can we go?

Pallavi : where are we going ?

Raghav : that's surprise

Pallavi : but how can we go in this hospital uniform

Raghav : don't worry you are not looking that scary. No one will be scare not even a kids

Pallavi : grrr this man I tell you

Raghav : why you girls take so much time. Come soon

Pallavi : ok I am coming

On my surprise he didn't take me outside hospital but inside hospital. It was children ward where cancer patients were admitted. I was looking at him with question mark. He signaled me to go inside. I was scare to go there but he holded my hand and took me inside ward. There were many kids who were suffering from cancer. There parents were there and looking sad but trying to make their kids happy.

All kids happy to see Raghav there. Raghav introduced them with me and it was looking like they all know him and very good friends of them. They called him Raghav bhaiyya. It was surprised to see this.

We met a one kid who is on last stage of cancer. As per report he is going to died soon but sadly he doesn't know that and really happy and saying about his dream to Raghav. He wants to become pilot and want to fly high and I was feeling sad that he is dying soon and he is watching such dream and Raghav was encouraging him despite knowing about his death. we met many kids one by one. I still don't know what is the purpose of coming here but I was liking to coming here. I thought it will be disaster but my pleasant surprise I was enjoying and learning. I play with kids and made friends too and I was feeling content and happy from inside I even forgot about mandar and whatever happened. I was not trying to be happy but I was happy from my heart.

I was not in mood to leave them but I had to leave them because Raghav was taking me some other place.

It was ward where old people were admitted. To my surprised they also knew Raghav and he introduced me with them and I spend time with them and they shared their life experienced with me and how some were dumped by their kids though they were sad with life but still happily accepted that. They have same energy like young people. I was feeling fresh and happy and after spending time with them we were leaving 2 3 aunties kissed Raghav on his cheek and he was blushing.

When we were going back to our ward I teased Raghav

Pallavi : Raghav some aunties had crush on you and see they kissed u

Raghav blushed more

Pallavi : omg omg someone is blushing so hard

Raghav : (self praising) arre hum hain hi waise only dumb people can not fall for me. You know what I mean ? (winking at Pallavi)

Pallavi : ohh hello come to earth and aunty has fall for you not young girl that means you are old

Raghav : kuch bhi kaho apna charm hi waisa hain

Pallavi : whatever. Btw you are quite famous and popular in kids and old people

Raghav : yes dear I am like that only

Pallavi : but seriously thank you for this picnic

Raghav : so how was picnic ?

Pallavi : it was amazing. I did not only enjoy but learn lesson of my life too.

Raghav : I am glad my mission is successful

Pallavi : what mission ?

Raghav : to show you reality of life. Pallavi I saw that you were trying to kill yourself and you were trying to be happy for your parents, you were crying for that person who didn't even look at you back

Pallavi : I don't want to talk about that

Raghav : but you have to listen about that

Pallavi : why ? why should I listen to you and who the hell are you? Thank you for this picnic but you don't have right on my life

Raghav : but your parents do have

I stopped after hearing this. what does he mean?

Raghav : yes Pallavi your parents do have right. What do you think they don't know that their daughter is faking her happiness for them and she is still crying for that guy and hiding her pain from them?

Pallavi : how do they know ?

Raghav : because they are parents. See Pallavi I am not saying just move on in one day because I know you need a time. Its not easy to let go pain like this but instead of crying you should learn from this phase and make yourself strong. Running away is not solution because you are fighter not looser.

Pallavi : I wish its easy to follow the way you are saying

Raghav : when did I say its easy but its not impossible. Today you meet two generation kids and old people. Kids who don't even know what will happened tomorrow will they died or not still they are watching big dream who knows god will listened to their dream and they will be survive or god wont listen and their dream will be unfulfilled still they are watching those dreams. They didn't even get their life to live and enjoy but they are here with open hand to hug life even without thinking will life reciprocate or not

Old people who already live their life. they also don't know how long will they live and they experienced their life and had worst phase too but still they accepted and living. No one stopped living right. Its not like they are happy but they are living happily.

Pallavi : but I am not strong like them

Raghav : yes you are. You don't know how strong you are until you face that situation. Pallavi I know I don't have right to say anything but as a friend which we are not I will advice change your perspective of life will be change that way.

Pallavi : how ?

Raghav : that's up to you. My work end here. From here its up to you what way you want to go. Life with full of life or life with full of sorrow. I will say don't take yourself for granted for anyone. Think about it. Its too late you need a rest

I was speechless to here whatever he said to me. I didn't think that way. Am I taking my life for granted for mandar? Am I taking my parents for granted for my sorrow? He is right instead of why me I should follow try me I am fighter not a looser. Suicide was never my way. I always face problem so how come I accepted defeat like that. That night I was thinking about his words only. I was like my life has ended because mandar left but he was not my life he was part of my life. my head is spinning I need asleep.

In morning I was sure what should I done and not for other but for myself. Raghav show me way to life and I am really thankful to him. In morning I greeted him happily and thanked him for showing me mirror of life. I am not saying I moved on and happy but I learned big lesson of my life which will help me to move ahead in life. we became a good friend next day also went like that only. I asked him why is he helping me

Pallavi : may I ask you a question ?

Raghav : sure ?

Pallavi : why are you helping me like this. you don't even know me and still help me. Its not like that I am objecting but I am curious to know that.

He came closer to me and look at my eyes passionately I was scare to see him like this and he cupped my face and said tome with heavy voice

Raghav : because I fall in love with you

I was shocked scare speechless confuse what not and he was looking at me like that don't know how long I was blank and suddenly he started to laugh I was more confuse

Raghav : look at your face arre baba I was joking. I helped you because I love to help other

I beat him for scaring me and started to laugh with him don't know how long

It has been 5 days in hospital. After 2 days I am going to discharged and I was happy and sad both time. Happy because finally I will be at home and sad to leave my new friends those kids uncle aunties and specially Raghav. It has been only 3 days we became friends but look like we are friends from ages. He is indeed my best friend and guide for me. I always wonder why his family is not here to visit him and I asked him many times.

Pallavi : why is your family not here ? I never saw them to visit you? Where are they?

Raghav : they are not here because I will go to meet them without any tension and diseases

Pallavi : what diseases you are having ?

Raghav : heart diseases

Pallavi : shut up Raghav be serious

Raghav : I am serious Pallavi

Pallavi : you and your joke. You know what I will be discharged very soon. When will you discharged ?

Raghav : very soon. May be same day as your and I will meet my family after long period

Pallavi : ok you promise you will come to meet me at home

Raghav : for your hand from your aayi baba right

Pallavi : Raghav I will kill you

Our days were going like this only by bickering

It was last night at hospital and Raghav gave surprise party as per hospital rules for my farewell yeah wherever Raghav everything is possible and gave nautanki speech too. Everyone greeted me happily and wish me not to come here ever as a patients. I was teary eyes and I am surely going to miss them specially Raghav. My aayi baba were there too and they were also happy to see this. this hospital gave me a lot hope for life and new friends

It was already late and we were in our ward. Wehad a chat. Raghav suddenly become a emotioanlly

Raghav : Pallavi tomorrow you are going

Pallavi : yes and I will get rid from you forever

Raghav : that's great na?

Pallavi : nope because I am going to miss you alot. You know what thank you Raghav for coming in my life and showing me importance of life otherwise I would have miss such opportunity and destroy my life. thank you for everything you are not only my friend but my guide too who show me way to real life. you were right I was wasting my life for that person who didn't even came to meet me not even my so called friends but wrong time show right face of people. You are biggest gift for me. Thank you very much

Raghav : see I told you I am charming

Pallavi : when will you be serious

Raghav : at the last day of my life

Pallavi : please don't talk like this

Raghav : (dramatically) hey bhagwan main yeh ladki ka kya karu serious to bhi problem na serious to bhi problem

Pallavi : (more dramatically) : hey bhagwan iss ladke ka kuch nahi ho sakta

And we both laughed

Raghav : I will miss you Pallavi

Raghav : same here

We both hugged friendly

Raghav gave me a letter and told me to open after going home only.

Pallavi : I prayed to god that you meet your family very soon

Raghav : thanks now sleep its too late

Due to late sleeping I slept for long when I woke up I saw Raghav bed was empty may be he went outside without me. I was sleeping till late that's why. My parents were there looking sad and I was feeling gloomy and whole hospital was looking dull like something has happened. Instead of smile I saw sad face who was trying to smile. I asked my parents about Raghav but they were not saying anything I was feeling something wrong had happened and I was asking for Raghav again. I was feeling something happened to him. Finally my parents told me he had an operation which was unsuccessful and he is no more. I was blank to heard that and collapsed on my bed. What suddenly happened to him. I remembered he gave me a letter and I was searching that and I open where he wrote about him in that letter where I got answer of my many questions about him

Precap : Pallavi read Raghav's letter and her first day in college

part 4

(Raghav was writing letter for Pallavi before giving her and pouring his heart in that letter)

(toally based on Raghav POV)

Hi Pallavi,

Wish you a very very good morning.

I know there are many questions are going in your mind but don't worry i will give your answer but one by one but before that wipe your tear and give your 400 vault smile to me. Here you go with long story of my life in short way. You Raghav Rao or you can say i am doctor Raghav Rao yes you read it right. Tumhe kya lagta hain yeh hospital wale aise hi kisi patient ko ghumane dege hospital me. Mujhe permission thi kyuki main doctor hoon errmm i mean tha. My family died few years ago in car accident and I was alone and went to in depression and i also decided to end my life just like you. i was trainee in this hospital when i thought to take that drastic step but god has some other wish. He send someone to save me. When i was about to kill myself i saw a figure of little girl who was suffering from cancer and doctor also gave up on her but she was still fighting for her life and she used to dream about her future and she was never worried about tomorrow but living in today she gave me strength to live again for myself and for people like her.i changed my mind and again start to love and live life. It was not easy for me but i learnt that. My life was going smoothly and this hospital is my home and patients are my family. when i started to learn to live god play one more game with me and i came to know that i am suffering from leukaemia though first i was cure from that but after few moths it again happend and it was going on and finally doctor also gave up on me and told me i had very few times but stillt hey were trying to save me and here had your entry in my life and i saw you in hospital who want to kill herself. I saw my past in you who had no motivation to live. I knew it if i will say don't commit suicide you will do that first so i play reverse psychology and motivate you to kill yourself and that worked and you started to see bright side of your life yes your parents who was there and will be there with you in every phase of life. At least you are lucky to have parents by your side all don't get that luck. I didn't say about my illness because i don't want to see pity for me in your eyes. It hurts to see people show pity on my condition. Nope i am not sad to leave this world as said whatever happened for good and i am glad atleast i helped someone and make a good friend.

I hope you got answer of all question and if you didn't get answer of many question it's better to stay unanswered like yesterday i told you about love.

I just want to say only one thing before ending this letter. Pallavi never allow anyone to pity yourself not even yourself to pity yourself. Don't insult yourself and live your life like a queen and always be happy and spread happy. I wont be with you but you will always be here with me in my heart and my prayers and i will request god to give you true love who will make your life beautiful.

Bye Pallavi my family is waiting for me i have to go. Don't forget i love you my best friend.

Your stupid and unbearable friend,

Raghav Rao

(i hold letter. I want to write that i am falling for you Pallavi. I love you but i cant because i don't want to make you feeling guilty without your fault. I just wish you happy life where you will get your deserving happiness and secret will also end with me that i love you Pallavia nd i will miss you and kiss Pallavi name and look towards Pallavi who was sleeping peacefully in near by bed)

Pallavi POV

i was crying and close my eyes only with that expectation that its dream and Raghav will be there beside me and laughing at me by saying how he fool me and with that hope i opened my eyes i saw towards his bed but no one was there. I was feeling lonely and i read his letter again and it gave me strength again. I decided not to cry because it will hurt him and i know he is happy wherever he is. After so many years he will meet his family and i should be happy for that and smile and happy for him.

Today is my last day in this hospital. Before leaving i met everyone. They were also sad to loose Raghav but they will cope-up with life Raghav has taught them that. Life will also teach that. After visiting everyone i went to Raghav bed and i sat there and i touch that bed only to feel Raghav presence there.

Raghav you told me everything now it's my turn. I won't bore you like you bore me. (i smile only to fight with my tears who was coming from my eyes) thank you for everything Raghav. you know you are best thing happend to me in worst phase. You taught me love and to live and importance of my parents and most important myself. Thank you for everything and i promise I won't let you down and i will be happy and I won't miss you because i will never ever forget you. you wont be here with me physically but you will in my heart forever. I love you too my best friend. I am living and i will pray for your happiness and i am happy that you are with your family.

I kept rose on his bed and kiss his pillow and squeezed that. Bye Raghav.

Baba came to called me and i left hospital. When i reached outside hospital and last time i glance towards hospital gate and i saw Raghav was standing there and signal me to smile and i smile at him and he waved me bye saying all the best for my life.

I smile and look ahead my life.

It has been 4 days i came to home. My parents were not leaving me alone because they were scare that what if i will do same thing again but i assure them this time i wont do that actually i will never ever do that. I learn lesson of my life. I decided to join college again but they were reluctant for that. After so many arguments finally they were agree dand i was happy though i was scare too what will happen if i will see him again there and i will lose my confident. Nope i wont loose myself again. I saw myself in mirror and close my eyes and open and encourage myself i wont loose myself again and i am strong girl.

My baba was with me when i was going to college. He was still worried for me and decided stay but i force him to go and assure him his daughter is change but in good way and she will never do that again. After lots of effort he left.

i was outside my classroom and gathering courage to go inside. It was not easy but its not hard too. I can do it i can do it i was chanting there. With all courage i entered in classroom and there he was sitting with his new GF for whom he left me. It hurt for sometime but not like earlier. I passed from their bench and sat in empty bench.

After completing lecture i went to canteen and i noticed everyone eyes are on me and they were looking at me strange way. This is not first time i am noticing this since i entered in college gate. Few are showing pity, few were gossiping about me and there comes my friends and mandar with his GF. It strange to whom i used to called my close now they are keeping distance from me like i did a big crime. No one came to visit me at hospital and no one came to meet me in college. As said wrong time show right face of people and they were never my friend.

I was having my breakfast and i heard their talk. They were talking loudly purposely so that i can hear them. Mandar was talking more loudly to his GF. You know baby Pallavi love me alot and for that she try to kill herself and many time beg me to come in her life but i am madly in love with you and you only. You are my type and my status too and kiss on her cheek only to show me. Look at that poor girl everyone are not lucky to have me in their life (pointing towards where i was sitting). Tch tch tch bichari Pallavi (my so called friend were pity on me and after hearing that other were started to looking at me) that was hurting and embarrassing and i close my eyes only to stop my tears from falling from my eyes. I again heard bichari Pallavi and suddenly Raghav face came in front me. Pallavi never allow anyone to pity you and not even yourself. Those words gave me strength and i open my eyes but this time i was not hurt but i was smiling and get what Raghav want to convey me. I stood up from my chair and start to walk towards mandar and his gang. Mandar saw me and give evil victorious smile said

Mandar (to his gang) : here she comes only to beg to me so that i come back to her life but she will be disappoint again (looking at me) see Pallavi if you are here to beg me then let me clear you i wont come to you because i love her got it.

Pallavi : thank you mandar for leaving

(Everyone was expecting something else not thank you and there were looking at me in shock face specially mandar whose mouth was wide open and i actually want to laugh on them but i control)

Thank you very much for leaving me otherwise i could never understand value of my life and my parents and i will never understood who is my real friends. (looking at my so called friends) thank you for everything. thanks for emptying place in my heart so i can give place to those people who are actually deserve that. You are wrong choice of my life and i don't regret to loved you because my love was not wrong person was wrong to whom i love madly and neglected my parents. Thanks for that. You don't exist anymore in my life and you are not bad memory but good lesson of my life. I was never happy and at peace from the day out relationship started. The way you treated me like a show off piece and try to change me. Today i am what i am not what you wanted. I am happy for you that you got that girl the way you want and i am sure i will get best life patner because my true friend and parents blessing are with me. I wont waste my single moment for you. all the best you two for future. Don't forget to invite me in your marriage only if that will happen i wink at them and turn and left. I can so imagine their face. If i was standing there one more minute i will surely laugh on their face. When i was leaving i felt everyone eyes on me not with pity but surprise and i heard clap after i left and this time mandar and gang were embarrass with that.

After coming out from canteen and i started to run towards ground and tears were coming from my eyes not because of hurt and sadness but due to happiness i am feeling peaceful and i started to enjoy andi t seems god is also happy with my decision and he also came to enjoy with me because it started to rain and i was feeling like bird and i spread my hand like bird wings and started to enjoy this moment and i was laughing smiling thank you thank you so much Raghav.

epilogue

It has been 15 years to that incidence. When i look back i don't feel regret but see as a lesson. I was engrossed in my thought i heard voice of kids yes my kids pari & kush and and my loving husband Raghav (nope he is not that Raghav but he is no less than him. he is also blessing my life my friend Raghav was right and he actually send for me great life partner Raghav Rao and surprisingly there name are same. I met Raghav in college. He was also there when i lecture to mandar and gang. It was him who clap for me he disclose that later to me. He proposed me at the end of the final year in farewell party and i was not sure but he gave me time too and we started to date each other. He knew about me and mandar and i also told about Raghav and my hospital journey he was ok with that he accepted me without any doubt and understood me and respected me and moreover that he accepted me the way i am. Slowly slowly we came close to each other and i finally accepted his proposal and we got married and after marriage my life was like fairytale and he made my life beautiful and gave me 2 beautiful gifts pari and kush and my parents were also happy to see me happy.)

Raghav : hello madam where are you lost. We are waiting please come soon and cut the cake

Yes today is my birthday. We celebrated my birthday and pari and kush gave me hand made greeting card i was so happy see that. My family member gave me gift one by one except Raghav. After celebration all left to their room leaving me and Raghav alone.

Pallavi : Raghav where is my gift?

Raghav : what gift ?this cake is my gift?

Pallavi : you are so kanjus

Raghav : actually sorry forgot gift (he was guilty)

Pallavi : (realising that) you don't need to give me that because you give me best gifts of my life

Raghav : what ?

Pallavi : your family and our kids and most important your love and support

Raghav :- really (with mischievous smile)

Pallavi :- yes

He took me in his arm and takes me towards our room.

Pallavi :- hey what are you doing ?

Raghav : planning to give you third gifts and wink at me

I understood his meaning and blush

Everything black out.

all parts are updated

I hope you will like it 😊

What a story yrr😭it made me cried 😭beautifully written 😊indeed a life story 😊

Originally posted by: ...EhSaas...

all parts are updated

I hope you will like it 😊

It was so emotional and meaningful. Keep writing more stories.

I loved the fact you uploaded whole thing at once.

Originally posted by: Kavita99

What a story yrr😭it made me cried 😭beautifully written 😊indeed a life story 😊

Thanks dear ☺️

I am glad you like it

Originally posted by: Amnnaa

It was so emotional and meaningful. Keep writing more stories.

I loved the fact you uploaded whole thing at once.

Thanks dear 😊

It was already written and only 4 chapters so I thought it is better to upload together instead of taking break 👍🏼