Hi Pallavi:
Thank you for responding promptly.
Here are my responses in blue.
Many of us have appreciated several of Purvi's actions and choices. I have never seen her as the only or totally flawed character. As I have said repeatedly in my posts, in my view all the three in the love triangle are flawed characters and have made repeated mistakes that end up hurting many. But if our basic presumption is that Ovi's character is that of a heartless villain, then I am perhaps in a wrong debate. My mistake. I will still try to explain my position one more time with regard to this thread.
It would also be nice to hear your response about my question about Onir's bashing on the forum for following the same logic of bhalaai as Purvi in the baby swap incident.
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"merely childhood friends" is an interesting phrase. Childhood friendships are some of the strongest bonds people develop. If people remain in touch, they remain lifelong. So, if Ovi is doing this as a childhood friend of Arjun, that just shows the strength of their bond.
Where did that friendship go when Ovi was married to Arjun? How could she expect Arjun to stop loving Purvi? Friends always understand each other's feelings, where was her understanding of Arjun then? She behaved horribly as his wife, even tried to kill his/her child!
Please note that I have used the word "if" here and later in the post I have pointed out that Ovi's feelings for Arjun have changed with time - in the early phase also she loved Arjun intensely but possessively - for the sake of what she wanted. Plus, Arjun had promised to marry her before leaving Canada. If Arjun is in the habit of lying, how is anybody to know when he is telling the truth? She was a bad wife? To a degree yes, she was. She did not try to win Arjun over and kept drinking hurting her baby. But not to allow her a feeling of being humiliated would be going too far. Granted that she was totally unreasonable and unethical, why did Arjun agree to marry her?
Ovi's baseless expectation of love was shattered with time. But the bond of childhood friendship still remained. Their bond can be seen as especially interesting because both grew up without mothers in a foreign country in immigrant families. I am for giving this bond its due.
Further, from what perspective is it Ovi's fault now not to have revealed the truth when the two lovers who were spouses by the time the Canada fiasco happened could not clarify things themselves? And Arjun did not tell Purvi multiple lies, it was in singular (what other lie did he tell? I am not sure). Purvi was admittedly stressed out when the fiasco happened, but in comparison to Ovi, she had always been in a more powerful position with Arjun and she knew that. Plus, how do we know that Arjun had not asked Ovi not to contact Purvi then because Ovi's call could have created further complications?
Arjun hid truth of his and Ovi's engagement from Purvi, this wasnt the first lie he told her! And this one BIG lie was greater than anything as it broke her trust in him completely! He told that blatant lie that he was at a meeting just after she had seen him with Ovi and their secret child! How would a wife feel? How would she trust Arjun's love for her after that!
We cannot conjecture that Arjun told Ovi not to call Purvi, why would he do that? My main point was why didnt Ovi try to clarify to the Deshmukhs that she wasnt living with Arjun? That would have cleared up all the confusion! Then it follows that she didnt want ArVi to reunite!
First, after the incident of hiding engagement with Ovi, Purvi and Arjun had been through a lot during which Purvi too had hidden important things like pregnancy from him. But it all got sorted out through conversations. So, why is this lie so big that it could not be sorted out through talking? Also, why is Purvi's feeling insecure right and Ovi's was wrong? Both were in similar situations.
As we all know, the "secret child" happens to be a child conceived during marriage. If Purvi hid the truth of her pregnancy for Ovi's bhalaai, why can't we give the same credit to Ovi when she had realized about Arjun and Purvi's love? Why should we not note any positive change in that character?
Yes, you are right, we cannot make any conjectures about what is not shown. But there is a difference between a reasonable inference and a fantasy. Have you ever seen Purvi listening to anyone? As I have expressed repeatedly in my posts, in my POV her heart is in the right place. But she thinks she is always right and does not listen to anyone (except perhaps Archana). That is the biggest flaw of this character, though she has other good qualities. This flaw is bigger than just being impulsive because every single character in this show is impulsive. But many others listen to other characters - Purvi does not, until it is too late.
And does Ovi know how to make herself heard? It is true that she screamed irritably in the early tracks, but it was clear that her screaming was not getting anywhere. As Arjun's wife she was screaming because she was perceptive enough to see that her husband was dreaming about someone else (no fault of Purvi here). It could not have been difficult for Ovi to understand that she would not be heard seriously by the D family.
I firmly believe if Ovi had called Manav alone, he would have listened! She was his favorite child and he always overlooked her tantrums, her screaming and always supported her in even her wrong actions! Did she even try to contact her father? Or her twin sister to whom she was so close? She just let them believe the worst? WHY?😕
This is again in the area of conjecture, even though I would accept it as reasonable inference. True. Manav had always supported Ovi until she started drinking during her pregnancy. Could she have called him? Perhaps. But she was in a weaker position than him once the reality of her child came out. It would be difficult for her to make the first move. Could Manav as a parent or Teju as a twin sister not have tried to find out what was going on? Not even about a sick child? And which mother would care to get back into the good books a family that did not make even one inquiry about her child? What does it matter what the people who do not even recognize the existence your child think of you? To me, not even making an inquiry about a sick child is truly unimaginable in sensitive people. Whatever the mistakes of the parents, a child just does not deserve apathy. I maintained this regard to Pari earlier, and the same goes for Pia.
As for any kind of family bonds, if we remember, by the time of the Canada fiasco, Ovi had already moved her own way, alone. She had left India and it was clear that the D clan was not exactly dying to bring her back. They were too busy making wedding plans. Any person with any sense of selfhood would not contact such a family. In the next 20 years, the Ds and Ks presumed that she was alright and happy. But no one cared even to see the grandchild, who, they knew had been terribly sick. Why should she do anything for them or try to re-establish her relations with such an excuse of a family?
Ovi left her family and went to Canada of her own accord. Archu had begged her to stay but she didnt as she was going to have a baby and didnt want her family to know. She divorced Arjun so she had no reason to stay there. Since she had divorced Arjun and moved on, why would she feel unwanted by her family? I remember Archu asking her to stay after the wedding and she did stay. Didnt she return to help Onir, attend ArVi wedding, and stayed back for 2 months while leaving her premature baby in Canada Hospital in the ICU? That was classic of course!
There is such a strong parallel between Purvi's leaving to hide pregnancy to protect Arjun-Ovi relationship and Ovi's leaving to do the same for Arjun-Purvi, it actually proves my point about Ovi's growth from an obstinate and self-centered spoiled brat to a mature character. As for being unwanted by her family, what exactly did the family do to bring her back during the time between her leaving and coming back for Onir's sake? And this is especially true during the 20 years after the fiasco.
As for her leaving her child in the care of a trusted friend, why is it so different from Purvi letting her child be raised by someone who she thought would take good care? It was not as if it was a permanent move. Ovi had returned temporarily to help a person who she realized was being wronged. Many would see this as taking a stand.
From the current track it appears that it was Arjun who asked Ovi to lie to protect Purvi. She is doing it for him. Ovi's love for Arjun was beyond the limits of reason from the beginning. Earlier it was focused on what she wanted, later it developed into a focus on what he wanted. This lie she is telling Purvi is a part of the path Ovi's feelings for Arjun has taken. She does not owe anything to anybody else.
She owes Arjun nothing either. She shd know best that hiding such life and death truth wreaks havoc in the life of the person lied to! Still shes lying to Purvi and hurting her with this whole charade!She knows its wrong, shes telling Arjun he shd tell Purvi but shes still helping him!That is just plain wrong!Friends dont let friends make such monumental mistakes!
You are right. She does not owe anything to Arjun either. But my point is that she is doing it for him because she wants to, because of her feelings for him. If one is in a situation where a close friend is dying and has a wish that one finds unreasonable, one would try to reason with the friend, but would still try to fulfill his/her wish if the friend does not budge. And why should Purvi be the center of Ovi's concerns? Her concern is Arjun. If lying about the past 20 years gives him the satisfaction of protecting Purvi in some way, Ovi would reason with him if she thinks he is wrong, but would ultimately care for his satisfaction. Besides, the track is not over yet. It may end up in the "Kal Ho na Ho" kind of situation where the dying person rises above everyone else with everyone around glorifying him. Ovi may decide to reveal the truth just in time. May be Purvi will then take Arjun to Canada for better treatment as everyone cries buckets and we will only hear about their well-being from others after the actors have left the show. I expect a totally melodramatic end to this track.
In short, in my POV, Purvi has a good heart and wishes well for others but she thinks she is always right and imposes her views on others; Arjun does not wish anyone wrong but he is weak and takes Ovi for granted; Ovi began as a self-centered and obstinate character but has grown immensely over time through mistakes. In their respective journeys they all have hurt other people. No one is a saint; and no one is strictly a villain.
Cricket
Udne Ki Aasha
Veer Hanuman
Anupamaa
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
