*From To Sathish* - Thread 3 - Page 101

Redemption 192

"Our souls speak a language that is beyond human understanding. A connection so rare the universe won't let us part.

Rudran had excused himself from the table citing tiredness and the others understanding it watched as the man of the moment walked back into renu's bedroom.

She had been quiet all this while and yet she suddenly stood up with a rather worried look on her face and followed her heart and shutting the door gently came and stood by his side and both stood watching the afternoon light travelling across the green grass that lay like lush carpet in the lawn outside her window.

" Something is wrong or something is going to happen and it is not going to be good news,rudy."

Rudrarn threw his arm around her shoulders " I sense the same feeling,something terrible is going to happen and there is nothing i can do about it."

Looking down at her upturned beautiful yet worried face,Rudran planted a soft kiss on her lips " But renu,how is that you are sensing the same thoughts as me."

Renuka smiled,shook her head " i did wonder about that in the beginning but then i realised what it was and actually am better because of it.It was what kept me going and also why i kept my faith for i knew that you were well,alive and safe."

" I am sorry,what are we talking about now?"

" stupid man,i am talking about our son who has made the connection with my mind and soul and it is he who keeps me informed and updated about you.But this is something else,something new for our son seems to be not only upset but angry for he too senses something tragic that is going to happen."

Rudran sighed sadly and just collapsed into the bed and sat holding his head with both his hands " i dont know what to do renu and i am getting scared,really scared that something might happen to you are to one of the others who are now part of our family circle."

Looking into her eyes as she sat next to him " You know what the really frustrating thing is,it is not knowing why all this trouble is haunting me and you and why it has been troubling my people for so many centuries."

Looking down at his calloused hands " so much killing and so much blood has been spilt and there is just no end in sight and all i and the others can do is keep fighting,keep killing and we keep doing it again and again in the name of all that is good and that light which is our beacon."

Renuka took his hands and gently placed it on her womb and both watched as something magical happened.

A strange glow filled the womb and entered rudran and both he and renu watched as it crept up his arms and filled his face and his body.

Renuka suddenly looked into rudrans eyes " what happened in thailand rudy? what did you learn for our son tell us that all the answers lie in the beginning for that is where it all happened and for answers you must travel back to where it all started and flowed from."

" I know renu but that is the hardest part for this tale just has no beginning and it is the tale of the universe itself for there is not beginning or at least we are so far away from that shore that it is just impossible to know everything."

Renu kissed his cheeks and then lips and then let her tongue gently lick his lips,wetting it " Baby,you need to apply some vaseline on your lips for they are all chapped up."

" Rudran,do what you have to do for it will work out in the end.Our son tells us that the answer will come when the moment arrives and the dead will rise again like a phoenix from the ashes."

He gently pulled her close to his strong chest " i know for so many of us,better than me have come and gone and they have all died fighting for the cause and for the light.Someday renu,when it is safer and all this troubles are behind us,we will travel together with our son to thailand for she waits for us to give her blessings."

JANNAL ORAM-34

"Happiness, not in another place but this place...not for another hour, but this hour. ? Walt Whitman

Jeeva saw raman glance and linger for the briefest of moments for turning his concentration back to the congested road again.

" Why and what was that look in your eyes,raman?"

Raman felt more loved and touched that she could read even his subtle and brief looks and moods and it only gave him more reason to love her rather than feeling threatened as some do and maybe they are justified in wanting their private space.

" We just passed Higginbothams and my thoughts ran back to the times from high school and also the years in law college when i used to spend lots of time in that place.Browsing,reading and just generally loitering among the book shelves."

" Loitering,why?" and raman nodded " true,loitering would not best describe those precious moments and maybe lingering would be more apt and be the correct description."

" go on raman,i love the way you talk not only about work but yourself.But you hardly ever talk about yourself and that stops now for i want you to tell me everything about yourself for i want to absorb you completely into my mind and body."

Raman gave her a comic expression and imitated vadivelu " Aaha kilambitaanya,kilambitaanya!!"

Jeeva burst out laughing and raman joined her " That was just like vadivelu raman.exact impression."

Raman's face became a bit serious " Jeeva,this is all there is to me and i have no hidden layers or hidden sides to me.What you see is what you get? Honestly,i consider myself very boring and ordinary."

" no raman,don't ever say that.Maybe,people will form that kind of opinion and wrongly so for they probably only see you and interact with you at work and hence you don't show them all that is you.i think your layers are more of intelligence and i think the deeper and closer a person gets to you the more they learn about you.But the most lovely thing that is you is that you never,ever display that intelligent side of you and rather let people think that you are just ordinary and mundane."

Raman shook his head " Oh my god,is there nothing that you don't know about me and now i am really getting scared for i am wondering how impossible it is going to be to hide secrets from you and particularly my horny dreams in which my dream girl Actress simran comes every night to haunt me and taunt me."

" so simran it is.Every guy has some actress or other that they secretly covet and jollu kotufy and god knows what else they do with her in their thoughts."

Casually patting him his left arm " but not a bad selection.Actually pretty decent compared to the others for she dances well,looks hot and more importantly acts pretty well.But she is old news now and maybe you should try switching to the hot nayantara."

" sorry ma'am,simran then,now and to simran i will remain faithful forever."

" god you guys and your jollus."

Raman playfully nudged her with his left elbow " endiyamma,what about you women and girls.Don't you drool and dream over popular actors."

" I guess so.I did have a small crush on vikram but that was it.Then things took a different turn and along with it i went in the opposite direction of all that i knew and then work,priorities and now that road has led me to you."

Raman silently understood her pain that she felt from a wound that had healed but had left behind a scar that seemed to hurt each time it was touched and hurriedly changed the subject " you have been with this company for nearly eight years and have been coming and going through broadway for such a long time.Tell me what do you know about broadway"

" broadway.It is old and is also now called prakasam salai and it is always crowded and noisy.That's it."

Raman looked at her and jeeva " okay,tell me more for i would like to know all that is about the place i work in."

Raman spoke and he explained it so beautifully that jeeva suddenly " raman,in case your career as a lawyer does not work out maybe you can try your hand at being a guide and you should definitely write a book for this is so informative.For who would have thought that broadway was just a ditch,a drainage channel that soon became useless and was then converted into a road."


Broadway,chennai- A companion piece


Broadway is neither broad' nor does it have much way' about it, what with shops spilling on to the road and vehicles fighting for the space left. But in its time, it was a fine road which divided George Town into Muthialpet and Peddanaickenpet.

Prior to the road, it was an unwanted ditch. Much of the area, called Atta Pallam, was owned by Stephen Popham, a former British MP and later the advocate general in Calcutta.

He moved to Madras in 1778 and is credited with the setting up of a modern police force in the city in 1782.

The area where the General Hospital, Madras United Club and the Park Town post office stand today, was then a hill called Narimedu (mound of foxes) in Tamil and Hoggs Hill by the British.
This was construed as a security threat to Fort St. George and it was decided to level the area. Popham negotiated with the government to fill it with the earth removed from Hoggs Hill.

The thoroughfare that came up there was named Popham's Broadway.

Broadway today specialises in opticians. But in 1890s it was known for two food establishments. The first was P. Venkatachellum, whose condiments and chutneys were a rage in England.

He is credited with the creation of mulligatawny soup from milagu rasam. The other was Harrison's, a restaurant set up in 1891, which today is a modern hotel in Nungambakkam.

The city had its first private hospital run in the 1900s by Dr. T.A. Sankaranarayanan in Broadway. The road is now called Prakasam Salai, after the well known freedom fighter T. Prakasam.

What If-The return 16


"What is it like... what is it like to be dead?' Evan looked at him with his dull, unblinking blue eyes, ' I don't know, what is it like... to be alive? -----Daniel waters


The blind father Ronald sat in a permanent world of darkness and loneliness and more or less cut off from the world outside.He had seen for himself from the time he was a young lad as to how the world treated other human beings who were differently abled and those who exhibited even the slightest physical weakness and now in old age and blindness he smiled wryly to himself and thought " even old age is a kind of deformity for very few spend time with the old."

It is this cruelty of this inhuman world that had led his to the path of christ and service in his name for somehow he could not lead a normal life that others wanted and craved for he felt acutely the pain of all lives around him.Shunning all that is called normal in an otherwise abnormal world,Ronald selvakumar joined the church and immersed himself in the eternal grace of jesus and lost himself in his mercy and divinity.

But even inside the church,ronald had soon become disillusioned by the nature and activities of those that passed off themselves as priests and fathers and soon realised that any soul that still inhabits a physical body will also be ruled by that bodies needs and desires.Diving deeper and deeper,father ronald soon took to days and weeks of solitude and contemplation and this isolation and insulation from the outside world soon gave him an insight into his own powers of instinct and understanding that most would not recognise for they are so far removed from those purity and realisation.

Even with christ in his soul,Father ronald never ever doubted or disputed others views and thoughts and embraced everything wholeheartedly and while in the service of church,he went on to study and finish his PHD in chemistry.But only very few knew that he was now a doctor and that he also contributed many articles to an international science forum that eventually found their way into popular magazines.But he remained father ronald selvakumar and far away from the world that dwelled a lot on the importance of name,fame and played a different game.

The church of mother mary was nearly 90 years old and had expanded a bit over the years.when father ronald had come here as a very young boy of 10,the church had been just a building which could hold about twenty people excluding the shrine and altar of mother mary.But then with donations and contributions,the church had
purchased a few acres around the church and had built a few cottages with bamboo and cocounut leaves thatching and mingled in many of those early constructions were his own sweat and breath.

He had taught english,tamil,french,basic science and christianity to many hundreds of young souls and there was a time when even the sons and daughters of the english rulers had come to study under him.There had been many invitations for him to come to europe and also to settle in england but father ronald had gently refused saying that his purpose for life lay here in the church of mother mary.

But the past few years,life had changed for father ronald for he had made a friend,a quiet friend who spoke little and spoke it softly and for a time father ronald had begun to imagine that his friend was an angel in disguise.But true to his own nature,he never ever asked or intruded into his quiet friends space and just accepted him and his large silences and took comfort in his rather unique company.Yet,father ronald knew that there was something wrong about his quiet friend for he felt different and he felt this difference simply because of the years of penance,solitary confinement and with thoughts always bent towards christ and his immense mercy.

He sat up sensing the difference,the subtle changes in the air as his friend approached him and looking in the direction " My child,what is it? why do i sense such agitation in you? Is there anyway i can be of help to you or to your family?"

Mani stood quietly as always and pondered if he should talk about what had just happened in the forest.Mani had found this church by accident and in the process had made friends with the blind father and found it very comforting to be near the holy man.

" father,i need to confess something that i have done.I think i have sinned."

Father ronald turned towards the direction of mani's voice " sin,you my son.I doubt it.But if you want to confess then please go ahead for more than me you have mother mary watching over you."

" But father,i am not a christian by birth and i don't know what i am..."

Hearing the voice trailing in mid sentence,father ronald " child,the lord himself was not a christian but a jew.It might come as a surprise to you to hear these words from me a father,a priest in the service of the church but let me tell you one very important thing and that is christ and christianity have become two very varied states.I had no choice but to follow the path of the church but i tell you and to all those who will want to listen and understand that christ does not ask,never did ask or will ever ask a person to convert or to believe only in him.He is just a door,one of the many passages to the supreme being,the creator and actually it does not matter if you enter the door via hinduism,christianity,islam,buddhism or judaism."

The words of the blind man touched mani deeply and his sadness and guilt seemed to lift away from his soul and he felt a lot better.

Father ronald felt the change though subtle,he still felt the changer in mani and smiled in happiness and relief.

A few minutes passed and mani leaving out the part that he or his mother were dead people slowly explained the situation to father ronald who sat still listening and thinking.

" my son,i am not going to judge you for that is for the lord to do so and only he has that powers.But i feel it is not wise and also a sin to hide a dead man without allowing for his proper burial and for his friends and family to honor him and pay their respects."

Mani slightly irritated " he was a bad man,evil man with evil thoughts and do people like him too need a proper burial."

In the darkness,father ronald looked at mani " My son,don't be so quick and harsh in your judgement for that is the first evil a man can do,being judgemental.let the dead mans god judge him and believe me we all have to face the music,one way or another."

" what do you want me to do father? tell me,what can i do now?"

" Return the body child.return the body to where it belongs and let life and god dictate the terms of its course."

" Even the dead father.Does god dictate even the dead and the damned?"

Father ronald fingers which were rolling the prayer beads finally came to the silver crucifix and touching it softly and raised it to his lips and gently kissed it and looked in the direction of where mani was.

He then raised his right hand and made the sign of the cross " i bless you and forgive you in the name of the father,and of the son, and of the holy spirit."

Looking in the direction of mani " my son,nothing is above,beneath or impervious to his grace and knowledge and there is and surely must be a reason as to why things happen the way they are."

Taking a deep breath " for example,i am supposed to be alive and here you are dead and yet alive.why do you think that is."

The minute the blind man spoke the words,the room temperature dropped so low that everything nearly froze and father ronald felt the agitation and sudden burst of fear of the dead spirit and then it became calm and the temperature became normal.

Father ronald whispered to the darkness " I did not mean to scare you away my friend but rather was just trying to make you feel more comfortable with your existence."


A few kms away father james gunaseelan stood before christ and his thoughts were about his old mentor,guru father ronald selvakumar who once upon a time long ago had been an exorcist and an unconventional one at that.

Eyes that do,not show love and compassion are dead eyes
lips that do not love and say kind words are dead lips
hands that dont help or guide others are dead hands
legs that dont carry the burden of others are dead legs
souls that do not love and care about other souls are dead souls

JANNAL ORAM-35

"I will not tell you our love story, because-like all real love stories-it will die with us,as it should.
John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

pssst,lend me your ears and i will whisper a joke that is only for you all to know and for me to say and that is that all lovers think,dream and imagine that theirs is the perfect love story.They think their lovers kiss is the perfect kiss and their lover is the greatest lover of all and the best part is that this greatness is treasured and mirrored in each others eyes and souls and is never put out for debate like the other popular ones as to whose god and religion is greater and whose beliefs are the truth.

I only wish like the lovers,people too live in their own minds and dreams and let others exist too peacefully with their beliefs and idols.Fat chance of that happening.

Jeeva opened the door and quickly got out for on the busy broadway road even a momentary pause of a vehicle causes pile ups and then the orchestra of horns start and split the air and also the eardrums in the process.9 out of 10 times,the honking is accompanied with lovely and heartwarmign words such as " saavu girakki,somberi,porambokku,naansense" or even more degradingly a vehicle will pass,stop and the driver will look at you " enna boss,padichurukeenga,neengale ippadi pannalaama." These kind,understanding tearing of your entire education and personality is rather more hurting and insulting than somebody yelling " dei,edra vandiya."


But luckily for them both,they got a few seconds to see and blow kisses to each other and jeeva whispered " see you in the evening raman.Love you."

He had to leave for he was in the car and so he left and she stood for she could stand on the platform and not cause any jams or pile ups and she stood watching his car slowly vanish and then take a right back to the parallel road that would lead him to the main road and eventually to Egmore and to his law firm.

Jeeva knew she was madly in love with him and this felt more real than the one she had felt all those years back and she knew it because her feet felt like they had sprouted wings and were about to flap,spread and take her away into the skies.Her heart raced when ever she thought about him and even more when she met him and looked into his eyes.His eyes were like deep,dark wells of soft and warm love and even a gaze from them made her feel that she was falling,falling into some deep abyss.And to top all that was the soft and gentle manner of his and the way he handled her and everything in general and this strangely evoked a very protective and fierce feeling in her to watch over him,nurture him and cherish him and live and die for him.

But more than anything were those sudden flushes and flashes of hunger she felt for his lips and his touch and she felt her cheeks going red in blush as she imagined his lips all over and in every part of her and she patted her head and calmed herself down " jeeva,ennadi aachu unakku.nee enna loosa."

Yet,the experience all though more than eight years old still remained as a scar,a festering scar that jeeva knew was only because her ego could not accept rejection.

" Maybe if i talk this out with raman,it will make better sense and i can then put an end to it forever" thought jeeva as she climbed the steps to reach the third floor and to the office of k.k.Enterprises.


Raman parked his car in the ample space available to all the staff for only the merc of their boss stood under its covers and the only other car was a maruti wagon r that belonged to one of the collegues.A couple of scooties belonging to the female staff also stood on both their legs of their center stands.The reason for so few vehicles was because of the advent of Uber and Ola cabs which were not only cheaper but also made it less of a burden for the staff of rangachari and associates to reach home or any other destination.And now with share cabs ( you can share a car with others heading in the same destination) in both the car services,rates were even cheaper.

After finishing his quota of small talk with his colleagues and also discussing with them about their case and this was always the case for most of his colleagues came to him for a final analysis although raman never went to anybody for suggestions,advice or insight not even to Gopal,the firms lawyer who handled all case pertaining to lands,taxes and registration who also happened to be the closest thing to a friend.But even that friendship was usually restricted to nursing a beer or a drink in one of the bars in the higher end of the society and making small talk about the small world that they all existed in.

Raman bumped into gopal who was on the way to saidapet high court and who looked at raman " second time in just a few days.You want to talk about it bro?"

" nothing serious or that important that i will need your counsel.But thanks for the offer.Have a good day gopal."

Gopal suddenly looked at him " there is something different about you." looking closer at raman's face " have you put on weight for your cheeks seems to have a fuller glow than usual."

Leaning back and with an accusing look " have you found somebody else to have a drink with.Brutus,thou shall partake intoxicating ambrosia only with lesser mortal such as me" he suddenly declared as if he was on stage reciting some shakespeare lines.

Catherine,the personal secretary of their boss passed them both and looked at gopal " Just a small role and that too in the 7th or 8th std and yet this torture goes on for ever and ever.lord have mercy on us mere mortals who inhabit the same space as his Majesty Gopal."

Gopal his imaginary stage tail tucked in slinked away and catherine looked at raman " ram,the boss is already in his office."

raman looked at his wrist watch which showed there were still five minutes left to 10.00 am and hurried to his desk and placing his laptop and hand bag on the table,buttoned his sleeves and tucking in his shirt properly knocked on the door and entered the domain of his boss,Krishnaswamy Iyer.


"May I see you again?" he asked. There was an endearing nervousness in his voice.

I smiled. "Sure."

"Tomorrow?" he asked.

"Patience, grasshopper," I counseled. "You don't want to seem overeager.

"Right, that's why I said tomorrow," he said. "I want to see you again tonight. But I'm willing to wait all night and much of tomorrow."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm serious," he said.

"You don't even know me," I said. I grabbed the book from the center console. "How about I call you when I finish this?"

"But you don't even have my phone number," he said.

"I strongly suspect you wrote it in this book."

He broke out into that goofy smile. "And you say we don't know each other.
John Green, The Fault in Our Stars

Just for fun so please no weapons

Nike was founded by men,so its tagline says " just do it."

If Nike had been founded by women,its tagline would have been " just do it...if you want to,I won't force you...It's your life...anyway you don't listen to me...Do what you want to do...Who am i to say anything...But it has to happen and you better do it!!!

Hindi songs i have been listening


Tubelight - Main Agar

Half Girlfriend - Baarish

Half Girlfriend - Thodi Der

Half Girlfriend - Pal Bhar (Chaahunga Reprise)

Jolly LLB 2 - Bawara Mann

Badrinath Ki Dulhania - Roke Na Ruke Naina

Ae Dil Hai Mushkil - Title Track

Raabta - Darasal

Meri Pyaari Bindu - Haareya


I beg of you please do not ask me about tamil songs and tamil films for honestly there is nothing much to talk about them both.

Melody and meaningful lyrics have been replaced by gaana songs and kuthu paatu and all in the name of box office which is obviously being governed by aliens.

Seriously,when was the last time you heard a song,stopped an turned in its direction for either the music or the words had trapped you in it.
But now it is only skin and cleavage and situational songs that sell and it is anybody's guess who is buying them or seeing them.

I totally agree that double meanings or words that allude to a woman's parts have had a place from time immemorial for in the end there is nothing more beautiful than a woman in the eyes of a poet and the only thing more beautiful is the love he feels for her.

But poetry and refinement has now been forsaken for crude and over the top rap and hip hop songs with openly intended passes and leering.

Songs are now not anymore about love and lovemaking but sadly only about sex and needs and perverted desires.I am not one to judge but i guess we are in an age where nothing is sacred anymore or private anymore.welcome my people to the 21st century.

Random thoughts with meanings

Those who had coins,enjoyed in the rain but those who had notes were busy looking for shelter.

Man and God both met and both exclaimed " My creator."

He asked " are you a hindu or a muslim?" and he replied " i am hungry."

The fool didn't know it was impossible.He did it.

" wrong number" said a familiar voice.

We don't make friends anymore.We add them.

They told me that to make her fall in love with me,i had to make her laugh.But every time she laughs i am the one who keeps falling in love with her.

What if god asks you after you die " so,how was heaven?"

JANNAL ORAM-36



The door shut itself quietly without even a hint of the slightest noise as if even it knew that it worked for mr.krishnaswamy iyer and feared his wrath.

For raman,it never failed to amaze him as to how quiet the room of his boss was and that one factor alone was enough for a person to judge the great man's character and that was he liked peace,quiet and that he got his work done in that kind of environment.

Krishnaswamy iyer looked up at raman ' sit please and make yourself comfortable." Looking at his cup " do you want me to pour you a cup of coffee,raman?"

" No thank you sir,i am good."

As always,he waited for his boss to start the conversation and moreover since it was the man himself who had wanted to see him,he calmly joined his hands with his fingers clasped and gazed on.

" Raman,this case between anwaruddin and unicorn steel feels a bit dicey.I fear that there will be a lot of fall out and there will be no clear winners but everybody will manage to lose something and a few will fare a lot worse."

Raman instinctively knew what his boss was alluding to but held his thoughts and waited for him to expand on his words.

" You know what raman,this calm demeanor and holding your counsel for the right moment is what i like about you and is also one of your most attractive qualities that got you into this firm."

Raman nodded and acknowledged the compliment and instead offered just a pleasant smile and waited for his boss to ask him or at least prompt the required answer.He knew that his boss was just voicing his ideas aloud and bouncing it off him and wisely waited for the right moment when he was allowed or rather required to speak.

Raman knew his limitations and also very well knew that his boss had no limitations and that he worked on multiple layers and came to a case from different angles and thus prepared an air tight case that would not be broken or cracked,not ever and not by anybody.

Krishnaswamy iyer leaned back in his plush,leather chair and looking directly at raman " Did you understand what i meant when i used the words fall out?"

" Yes sir,i did."

" okay,if that is the case,please explain my fears and why they should not be there?"

Raman smiled softly for he knew his boss was baiting him and he also was perfectly aware that the man knew all the answers to all the questions and that simply meant he knew every damn detail about every case that was being handled under his roof.But since he had been asked,he would have to answer and that was what took the few moments for him to compose his reply.

" Sir,if i did proceed with a criminal case against unicorn steel and its owner krishnaswamy iyer,then it means headlines,publicity for not only him,his company and family but also for mr.anwaruddin and his family.But answering specifically to the word fallout,i think it will be more damaging for mr,krishnaswamy for he has more to lose than our client.Not only will he lose the case,but face and a reputation.And it will not stop there for the splash will cause ripples and these kind of ripples will keep on expanding and cause unknown and unlimited damage."

Krishnaswamy iyer looked at raman " true,very true.So,now how do we proceed."

Raman " sir,forgive me for being presumptuous but i do have a plan."

" and the plan is?"

" Meet the man himself but only after getting permission from our client."

" why raman? what do you think you will achieve by meeting the man personally?"

Raman " maybe i will politely state the obvious for i think he is currently in the mindset of a raging bull and will just destroy everything and in the end will be an example for that famous idiom ""Cutting off the nose to spite the face"

" That is very noble of you but do you think your enemy will throw a lifeline to you when you are drowning.For in my experience,i have known people to step on the heads of the drowning enemy and hasten his death rather than extending a helping hand."

Raman looked at his boss Krishnaswamy iyer who lifted his right hand and raman taking it as cue for his thoughts " Sir,this is just a case between two human beings and not some war.I know you will think that it is weird the way i look at law and its functioning but in the end it is there to settle disputes amicably and peacefully.If that route does not work out then it will be not just one leg but both my legs on the enemies head pressing down and ushering him to his demise and defeat."

Then something happened,a unspoken rule was broken and it was by raman's mobile which sang its ringtone and called out to be picked up and raman totally ashamed and embarassed.quickly reached for his mobile " sorry sir,extremely sorry sir" and seeing it was jeeva,nevertheless cut the call and quickly placed the mobile in silent mode.

Looking up at his boss " sorry sir,that will not happen again."

" Dont worry about it raman.I am glad that we had this talk and am really happy that both of us are on the same ground.Please,keep me updated of this case and also the details of the meeting with unicorn steel owner krishnaswamy,when it takes place.Thank you.that will be all."

Mr.krishnaswamy looked and watched as raman left his room and recollected the look,his assistant had given the mobile although it was the briefest of moments but it had not escaped his eagle eyes and thought " Sad,my daughter has no idea that the man might be already taken.Wonder what she will do now?"

Raman waited for the door to close and out of sight of his boss,he took out his mobile and saw that there were three missed calls and worried sick,he hurriedly called jeeva who answered " i am sorry for disturbing you.I guess you must have been in the meeting with your boss.Really sorry."

" It's okay jeeva.I usually leave my mobile on my table so as not to let it disturb me when i am meeting the boss and that is what all of us do in the firm.But i guess today with you in my thoughts i kind of forgot it.

" Forget that.Why did you call me and that too three times? Is everything okay with you?"

" Yes.I am all right.I just felt like hearing your voice,that's it and i wanted to tell you that i love you so much."

Raman felt his heart racing at great speed " I love you too jeeva and i am sorry that i only have these three words to tell you how i feel about you when in reality, a million words won't suffice to express what you make me feel when i see you and also hear your voice."


"The pain of parting is nothing to the joy of meeting again. Charles Dickens

Things lost in the fire ( of life)

All that i am,was and is most surely not me
stimulation from friends,foe and family alike
knee jerk reactions,pulsations and capitulations
beaten,drilled,bored,massaged from baby to body

still an ember,a spark seems adrift,aloft and separate
it flows,floats but not away and in reach of my gravity
an outer body experience in which sight and sounds
go both ways,ember sees the flame,fire sees the spark
and all that the larks sand that i sadly lack

aspirations of desperation amid capitulations
so in my skin and outside my skin i survive
far from hunger of tummy,mummy and that of a dummy
far from putting my lips to life and saying yummy

so i wake to every waking sun and take of all that is to partake
among sun,sand and sea and in solitary company
they seem to come as one the ember and the fire
and they seek a life,a purpose much higher

smile and see the spark separate the moment i seek
for what is higher and what is lower
seek a sneak peak of my utopia
gentle tides of life,sea and love
gentle sands and soft hands

What If-The return 17

DIG Arivuselvam saw ponni sit up and cock her head,swivelling her ears and trying to locate the noise and catching her eye,he knew a vehicle was coming towards them.

It took him another half a minute for the sounds of the jeep coming up the hill to reach him and from those sounds of shifting gears and gentle acceleration,Arivuselvam knew it was Inspector loganathan.

The lights first came around the car as light always does and then the sounds and finally the vehicle came to the point where the road ended and at the edge of the forest and loganathan jumped out of the vehicle and saluted Arivuselvam.

Asking him to relax,arivuselvam looked at loganathan " what have you got for ponni? for the poor thing must be starving."

" Sorry sir,that was why i was delayed for i was running around with the dog handler arranging and collecting ponni's water bowl and food bowl."

Ponni,a bit thirsty and quite hungry barked her happiness at the sight and smells of her food and both loganathan and arivuselavm knelt down and set both her bowls next to ponni and poured water into one and rice with beef mince in another.

The bowl with the food seemed to vanish in just a few gulps and then happily lapping water from the other one,ponni luxuriously stretched herself on the soft pine needles and soon drifted off to sleep,although one ear was always up like a radar, alert to the softest noises that would mean some sort of threat to her masters.

Washing his hands,Arivuselvam looked at loganathan as he removed the wrappers around the chicken sandwiches and taking a bite,sighed " nice,if only there was a bottle of cold beer to go along with this sandwich,then this day would have been made just bearable."

As if he had been just waiting for those exact words,loganathan opened the rear door of the scorpio van and came back with a small beer cooler box and placing it on the cloth that was spread on the hood of the vehicle,pointedly looked back at Arivuselvam and went back to eating his mutton biriyani and onion raitha along with the brinjal curry.

Arivuselvam opened the box and taking out the chilled green bottle of Heinekin,used his strong fingers to pry open the cap and raising it in a mock salute " Thank god for small mercies in the shape of small beers " and took a generous swig from the bottle and looked at his partner in crime " Go ahead loganathan and dive right in " and both stood in the cold of the night high in the hills of kodaikanal and looked at each other in peace.

DIG Arivuselvam taking a deep breath of the fresh,pine fragrance filled air " this is what peace mean,an interesting case, a nice cold beer with two of my best partners for company."

Although in deep sleep,the erect ear of ponni who was lay stretched near their feet swivelled in the direction of the forest as 18 delicate muscles in her eat picked up the slight rustle and almost undetectable noise coming from the darkness and from the very spot where she had earlier encountered that which also had scared her witless.

But well trained as she was,a veteran of many close encounters with the most dangerous criminals and terrorists that walked the land,she slowly sat up and on her haunches trained her eyes to peer into the dark forest and at the same time,DIG Arivuselvam softly placed the bottle back on the cloth and wiping his lips with a paper napkin,raised a finger at loganathan and then patted his hip.

In unison,both quietly drew their handguns from their holsters and Arivuselvam gently touched ponni and indicated to her not to bark and alert who ever or whatever lurked in the darkness.

Ponni instinctively knew that they were going to head towards the spot from where the noise came and stood up on her legs and all three gently padded in the direction with ponni leading them unerringly.

But nearly ten feet away from the spot,ponni stopped and began to whine in fear and arivuselvam knew that the same thing that had spooked her and everyone else earlier in the day had returned.

Rather than arousing fear in his mind,it only brought out anger,cold burning anger in him and with his handgun pointed in the direction,he asked loganathan to stay back with ponni and switching on the powerful LED torch set the night ablaze with its pure,milky white light.

Inspector Loganathan saw Arivuselvam advance slowly towards a large tree and then stop abruptly and even from the distance,he sensed his boss react and it was this reaction which alerted him to some danger and he ran forward and came and stood by his boss.

DIG arivuselvam was staring at a body that lay on the ground and hearing loganathan and ponni's movements turned to them and shook his head as he was totally lost and confused.

Inspector loganathan looked at the body and at the DIG " sir,i was told that the body went missing and yet here it is.I am sorry but am i missing something?"

DIG Arivuselvam " No loganathan,you were told right and yes you and me are included are missing answers to this damn puzzle of a case."

Still holding his gun pointed towards the tree,Arivuselvam looked at ponni who seemed a bit relaxed now and stepped forward sniffing the air and both of them knew what the dog had felt as some danger had now passed.

DIG Arivuselvam roared loudly into the forest " I will get whoever is behind this murder and who is interfering in police matters,even if it takes my whole life."

Mani smiled from faraway on hearing these words and vanished into the night leaving the body of the dead father john in the safety of the police men and the police dog.