*Season 2, Week 28* Analysis Thread - Page 19

There is a pattern I have noticed with this show, and I think it has to do with the audience they cater to. In desi TV shows, it is very hard to have a flawed female lead (and I am not talking outright negative, but just a good person with flaws) and have that sell with the general audience. People are used to seeing a messed up, cynical man being "saved" by an optimistic, sorted woman who is unbelievably magnanimous and patient, to the point that her self-respect is questioned by more progressive audiences. It's not only an issue in Indian media -- in English, male-centric romcoms as well, you have this trope of the Manic Pixie Dreamgirl, the woman who exists only to show the fraught hero how to embrace life.

@Sam-I think you hit the nail on the head here. I have said it before. It's a norm on Indian TV. If the female lead makes a mistake, make the male lead commit a bigger mistake so the focus is shifted on him and everything else is forgotten 😆 Dev has gone crazy and he needs therapy. And am 100 percent sure this behavior of his will not be glorified at the end of this track he will be made to realise he is going overboard and suffocating his wife in the name of love. He needs therapy and assurance. What about Sonakshi? I made a post about this yesterday. Why is this being made about woman empowerment and financial independence? Dev may be a lot of things but he is not a chauvinist. He loves the fact that Sona is successful I'm her career. So I found it absolutely ridiculous that they had an argument about women having an identity of their own. And why is there no focus on Sonakshi's lack of reactions? She found out Vicky made them homeless and shifted the blame on her husband as a consequence of which she and her daughter were separated from Dev for 7 years. She also found out that Vicky still tried to destroy her husband even after she gave him a chance. Where is her reaction to this? How come Dev's behavior manages to extract more disgust and anger from Sonakshi than everything Vicky had done in the past 2 days? How come Sonakshi is more compassionate and perceptive with literally everyone apart from her husband? Trust me am not going Dev a free pass. He was always crazy and now it's gotten worse cos no one from his family bothered to correct his behavior. His mom in fact fueled it in the past cos it suited her purpose. But as much as Dev is going out of control, am just not able to understand Sonakshi. If Dev needs to tone it down, Sona really needs to be given better dialogues and made more expressive for god's sake. I can understand if Dev was always like this or Sona had enough being compassionate and understanding. But am yet to see Sona even try. Hell am yet to see if Sona even understands that Dev is being abnormal. It's sad that even Vicky and Elena have more meaningful conversations these days. I know the track needs to play out but can we please have our old Dev and Sona back? A more compassionate Sona followed by a less crazy Dev? Cos I will be really disappointed if this track just ends with Dev learning to be normal and sane without having any effect on Sona's stoic character.

Originally posted by: Samanalyse

There is a pattern I have noticed with this show, and I think it has to do with the audience they cater to. In desi TV shows, it is very hard to have a flawed female lead (and I am not talking outright negative, but just a good person with flaws) and have that sell with the general audience. People are used to seeing a messed up, cynical man being "saved" by an optimistic, sorted woman who is unbelievably magnanimous and patient, to the point that her self-respect is questioned by more progressive audiences. It's not only an issue in Indian media -- in English, male-centric romcoms as well, you have this trope of the Manic Pixie Dreamgirl, the woman who exists only to show the fraught hero how to embrace life.

With this show, I feel they are trying very hard to introduce a genuinely flawed female lead, but they are struggling to make that palatable to general audiences at the same time. That is why, every time a track focuses on Sona's flaws, Dev's reaction is blown out of proportion so the focus remains on his mistakes, and Sona comes out looking like the reasonable one. So for this track, I decided to try an experiment. Let's read the progress of events at another level by putting Dev's OTT reactions aside for a moment. This is not to say they are pardoned -- what he is doing is still intrusive and disrespectful, but this is a commentary on how the story is told, and how it leads us to focus more on Dev's mistakes while exploring Sona's in a much quieter way.

The way I see it, Sona has been building the precedent for this situation since the day she decided to move back to IN. She didn't move back because she was ready to be Dev's wife in the fullest sense again, but because she wanted to fix what she felt responsible for breaking. For that, she needed the status of being Dev's wife and residence at IN, but I don't think she was ready for the other implications. They were on a much healthier track when they decided to put off re-marriage for a while -- until they were ready to embrace the true meaning of the rasams -- because that left both of them clear on where they stood with respect to each other. When she moved in, and allowed him to call her Mrs. Dixit, Dev thought it meant that they were properly back together, but Sona was still very much in the process of accepting Dev as her partner again. As they continued to be on different planes wrt their relationship, the stage for their rift was silently set.

With the sistervention, Sona set a dangerous precedent. She went into Ishwari's room without consent to get the sisters', and set that whole process into motion without consent. When Dev found out about it, he didn't express anger, but supported her in her mission, even telling her not to take it personally if it didn't work out. She went ahead despite his repeated requests for her not to, and that gave Dev the message: sometimes in this relationship, one of us makes a unilateral decision for the good of the entire family. If the other partner has learned anything from the past, they won't react negatively but will trust that the other partner has their best interests in mind. This is how Dev behaved during the sistervention -- even though he didn't agree, he trusted Sona's vision and followed her instructions, acknowledging that she saw something he didn't. He is asking for her to do the same now, and she is refusing point blank. This is why Dev is confused about her commitment to the relationship, and if you ask me, rightly so.

Sona takes a lot for granted. Even in yesterday's episode, she insisted that she would take care of Soha and balance work the way she has been doing all these years, but even in the tidbit we saw of her life before Dev re-entered, she was hardly raising Soha alone. In fact, the last time they were in the same situation, it was Jatin who came to take care of an injured Soha, so that Sona could work. The problem is not that Sona wasn't there for Soha in that moment, the problem is that she hasn't acknowledged and addressed the care vacum left by their move to IN and change in Soha's family structure. If Sona wants to continue working the way she has been, she needs to have people at IN to fill in the practical blanks left by Asha, Bijoy, Saurabh, and Jatin.

As I wrote in my post yesterday, what Dev is trying to communicate (but doing a terrible job of) is, please make our nuclear family your first priority. Sona chose to stay in a joint family for the specific reason that Soha would always have care, but what happened automatically at the Boses needs to be sorted out mechanically at the Dixits. It is an awkward situation with Soha entering their lives at seven years of age, and they don't necessarily know how much they are expected to be involved. Even Dev is very new to being a full-time parent and needs some guidance. This is where I feel some communication with the Boses is essential -- Sona herself seems pretty vague on how much her family stepped up of their own accord. It's absolutely true that Soha is not just her responsibility, but as the one who made the unilateral decision not to bring Soha into Dev's life for seven years, I do think it is her responsibility to be more proactive in the transition.

Once again, it comes down to a question of balance. If Sona is not there, Dev should have the confidence that he is enough for Soha until she arrives. He is still in survival mode as a parent, constantly worried that Soha will stop calling him papa, or Sona will take away his rights, if he makes a wrong move. On the other hand, Sona needs to stop taking Soha for granted -- her stance for both Dev and Soha is that if the love is there, you don't need to prove it, but on the one hand, she has a husband who is going out of control with fear and insecurity, and on the other, a daughter who is being misguided right under her nose. Right now, she is making it a zero-sum game: if I am more proactive about my family, I will lose a little of my identity as a professional and as an individual. She is holding back on the family front -- especially identifying and as Dev's wife -- in order to guard that individual identity.

EDIT: As many of you pointed out, having that identity and being a role model is not just about work and financial independence -- a housewife can have a strong identity, distinct from her husband, and be an excellent role model just as well as a working woman can. True self-worth comes from how you feel about yourself. What I am realising more and more is that Sona doesn't think very much of herself inherently as a person -- she measures her worth by external achievements and milestones and craves external validation for the same. That's why she is so uneasy with the idea of anyone disliking her -- it impacts the way she sees herself directly.

Originally posted by: Samanalyse

There is a pattern I have noticed with this show, and I think it has to do with the audience they cater to. In desi TV shows, it is very hard to have a flawed female lead (and I am not talking outright negative, but just a good person with flaws) and have that sell with the general audience. People are used to seeing a messed up, cynical man being "saved" by an optimistic, sorted woman who is unbelievably magnanimous and patient, to the point that her self-respect is questioned by more progressive audiences. It's not only an issue in Indian media -- in English, male-centric romcoms as well, you have this trope of the Manic Pixie Dreamgirl, the woman who exists only to show the fraught hero how to embrace life.

With this show, I feel they are trying very hard to introduce a genuinely flawed female lead, but they are struggling to make that palatable to general audiences at the same time. That is why, every time a track focuses on Sona's flaws, Dev's reaction is blown out of proportion so the focus remains on his mistakes, and Sona comes out looking like the reasonable one. So for this track, I decided to try an experiment. Let's read the progress of events at another level by putting Dev's OTT reactions aside for a moment. This is not to say they are pardoned -- what he is doing is still intrusive and disrespectful, but this is a commentary on how the story is told, and how it leads us to focus more on Dev's mistakes while exploring Sona's in a much quieter way.

The way I see it, Sona has been building the precedent for this situation since the day she decided to move back to IN. She didn't move back because she was ready to be Dev's wife in the fullest sense again, but because she wanted to fix what she felt responsible for breaking. For that, she needed the status of being Dev's wife and residence at IN, but I don't think she was ready for the other implications. They were on a much healthier track when they decided to put off re-marriage for a while -- until they were ready to embrace the true meaning of the rasams -- because that left both of them clear on where they stood with respect to each other. When she moved in, and allowed him to call her Mrs. Dixit, Dev thought it meant that they were properly back together, but Sona was still very much in the process of accepting Dev as her partner again. As they continued to be on different planes wrt their relationship, the stage for their rift was silently set.

With the sistervention, Sona set a dangerous precedent. She went into Ishwari's room without consent to get the sisters', and set that whole process into motion without consent. When Dev found out about it, he didn't express anger, but supported her in her mission, even telling her not to take it personally if it didn't work out. She went ahead despite his repeated requests for her not to, and that gave Dev the message: sometimes in this relationship, one of us makes a unilateral decision for the good of the entire family. If the other partner has learned anything from the past, they won't react negatively but will trust that the other partner has their best interests in mind. This is how Dev behaved during the sistervention -- even though he didn't agree, he trusted Sona's vision and followed her instructions, acknowledging that she saw something he didn't. He is asking for her to do the same now, and she is refusing point blank. This is why Dev is confused about her commitment to the relationship, and if you ask me, rightly so.

Sona takes a lot for granted. Even in yesterday's episode, she insisted that she would take care of Soha and balance work the way she has been doing all these years, but even in the tidbit we saw of her life before Dev re-entered, she was hardly raising Soha alone. In fact, the last time they were in the same situation, it was Jatin who came to take care of an injured Soha, so that Sona could work. The problem is not that Sona wasn't there for Soha in that moment, the problem is that she hasn't acknowledged and addressed the care vacum left by their move to IN and change in Soha's family structure. If Sona wants to continue working the way she has been, she needs to have people at IN to fill in the practical blanks left by Asha, Bijoy, Saurabh, and Jatin.

As I wrote in my post yesterday, what Dev is trying to communicate (but doing a terrible job of) is, please make our nuclear family your first priority. Sona chose to stay in a joint family for the specific reason that Soha would always have care, but what happened automatically at the Boses needs to be sorted out mechanically at the Dixits. It is an awkward situation with Soha entering their lives at seven years of age, and they don't necessarily know how much they are expected to be involved. Even Dev is very new to being a full-time parent and needs some guidance. This is where I feel some communication with the Boses is essential -- Sona herself seems pretty vague on how much her family stepped up of their own accord. It's absolutely true that Soha is not just her responsibility, but as the one who made the unilateral decision not to bring Soha into Dev's life for seven years, I do think it is her responsibility to be more proactive in the transition.

Once again, it comes down to a question of balance. If Sona is not there, Dev should have the confidence that he is enough for Soha until she arrives. He is still in survival mode as a parent, constantly worried that Soha will stop calling him papa, or Sona will take away his rights, if he makes a wrong move. On the other hand, Sona needs to stop taking Soha for granted -- her stance for both Dev and Soha is that if the love is there, you don't need to prove it, but on the one hand, she has a husband who is going out of control with fear and insecurity, and on the other, a daughter who is being misguided right under her nose. Right now, she is making it a zero-sum game: if I am more proactive about my family, I will lose a little of my identity as a professional and as an individual. She is holding back on the family front -- especially identifying and as Dev's wife -- in order to guard that individual identity.

EDIT: As many of you pointed out, having that identity and being a role model is not just about work and financial independence -- a housewife can have a strong identity, distinct from her husband, and be an excellent role model just as well as a working woman can. True self-worth comes from how you feel about yourself. What I am realising more and more is that Sona doesn't think very much of herself inherently as a person -- she measures her worth by external achievements and milestones and craves external validation for the same. That's why she is so uneasy with the idea of anyone disliking her -- it impacts the way she sees herself directly.

The current track of Dev and Sonakshi is a parallel to 2 different tracks from season 1 -- the initial Sonakshi's job track where he kind of pushed her to accept his job offer and the track where Ishwari started the chula drama to get Dev to reveal his relationship with Sonakshi, while at the same time Sonakshi too wanted Dev to reveal their relationship.

In the job track, Dev first goes to Sonakshi's office to get her to accept his job offer by saying I will give you more money. Now Dev first told her don't go without telling me immediately after the bus incident. Sonakshi didn't accept his job offer so he got her fired. Now Sonakshi didn't listen so he installed the tracker app. After getting her fired he again offered her the job, Now when she didn't tell where her meeting is followed her there. Then he found her home address and went there and offered her job. Now he went through her files and asked his pa to set up all her meetings at home. Going by that track from season 1 after her 3rd refusal, Saurabh shows her a different perspective and she let him know that she has accepted his job offer and comes to IN. And my guess is this is exactly what will happen. Right now I am debating if that person who shows her the other side of the coin is Asha or Ishwari.

In the chula drama track leading to Dev telling Ishwari about his love for Sonakshi, he wanted to keep his two worlds different. He wanted to enjoy both his worlds without having to feel guilty. And this is exactly what Sonakshi is doing now. In the earlier analysis threads, Sonakshi was referred as BD -- Bijoy's daughter, Sonakshi and SM -- Soha's mom. Now there is a slight change in these names. Now it is BD -- Bijoy's daughter./professional life, SD -- Sonakshi Dixit/personal life.. The other two roles are fused to SM. When she went and proposed to him after his engagement was cancelled, SD was prominent in her. But as soon as she came home, she became BD. On hearing that the Dixit sisters are angry with Dev and he also has cut himself from them, BD's morality hurt. As we know she has that high sense of morality and she doesn't want any stain on herself from that perspective. She felt responsible for the strain and decided to correct it. It was BD who decided to come back to IN. But SD was also happy about being with Dev and basking in his love. It was BD who decided to go to the meeting alone that night, but SD called Dev for help. But BD was in a state of high having attained the new investment. The very next morning it was BD who was in complete control of SD.

It was SD who broke down, held Vickky's collar, slapped and questioned him. But when he started about how her relationship with Dev had become hollow and how they were fighting with each other, BD took back the control. When Elena first talked about telling Dev regarding it, SD wanted to, but when she saw the family in the garden, BD again took over. It was BD who decided to forgive him and hide the truth. As I mentioned in my post BD = victim and survivor, SD = author of all the miseries of Bose and Dixit family. If she stays as BD, then she can paint herself as the hero and doesn't need to feel guilty about anything, about any of her failures and ego. But if she becomes SD, then she will have to admit her faults. Admitting that she is the culprit, the "gunhegaar" of Dev and Soha, terrifies her. She saw what Dev did with Vickky and fears that she will meet the same fate if she tells him the truth. SD does love Dev very much and doesn't want to ever be separated from him. She is petrified of Dev's anger.

SD also knows that after admitting the truth to Dev, will also have to admit the same to Bose family. Let them know that Dev is not their culprit, but her ego was the reason for all their humiliation and suffering. She knows that Bijoy will be extremely disappointed if he gets to know the truth. And that is another thing she is not able to tolerate. Last but not least, SD will also have to take complete moral and ethical responsibility of hiding Soha's pregnancy and birth to Soha and absolve Dev of the guilt. She fears that Suhana might not love her anymore if this happens. That she might not forgive her. All this time she has enjoyed being that "perfect mother" for her, and is scared that Soha may hate her for what she did. All these fears is making BD push SD to one corner of her mind and body and act as if nothing has happened. Sonakshi Bose is not obligated to tell anything to Dev, but Mrs. Dixit needs to do so. Hence she wants to keep both these identities separate. This will give her an opportunity wherein she doesn't have to take any responsibility for the consequences of the last 7 years. She can continue to paint herself as the hero and be what she currently is in everyone's eyes.

Conversely what Dev is doing is pushing SD to come to the forefront. In season 1, he let her off the hook and didn't really tell her to take responsibility for her actions or decisions. But now he is forcing her to do that. He is telling her, I was about to leave and go far away from your life. Then you could have led it as you wanted to encumbered. But you chose to follow me and propose to me. When the topic of remarriage with each other came up, I told you that we should take our time. But you chose to come back to IN as Mrs. Sonakshi Dixit. You took both these decisions by yourself, I didn't force you. So take responsibility for the decisions you made. Now that you did choose to be Mrs. Sonakshi Dev Dixit, fulfill your duties completely and wholeheartedly.

I think what the makers are doing is also tying what she is doing now to the conversation Dev and Sonakshi had when she came to return the check of 4.5 cr. In that when he comments about her not knowing anything about business and she replying is it because I am not you. And kind of challenges that what he has achieved she will too and prove that she is equal to him. She also asks if he thinks that she cannot do it because she is not "Ishwari's son". He tries to make her understand but she storms out of there.

Similar to job track where he closed all her other doors, here too he is closing off all her escape routes. He knows her very well and he is using that against her, in his own way. Both SD and BD know this. She also knows that she will not get any real support if she tells the real truth behind Dev's actions. Like in today's episode Ishwari gave her that advise without really pointing fingers at her. I am talking about her saying that when Dev takes a decision, he takes it after thinking through. And Sonakshi understood what Ishwari was saying. She is getting cornered by him, where her only way out is the acceptance of truth. And it will be towards the end of next week. Even if on 4th, Sonakshi is not shown to admit the truth in front of Dev, it will be shown on 7th. But at least her realization by herself will be shown on 4th. Aug 7th will air the 375th episode and usually the makers have shown something special every 75 episodes. So I am trusting the makers 😃

Originally posted by: astrix90

@Sam-I think you hit the nail on the head here. I have said it before. It's a norm on Indian TV. If the female lead makes a mistake, make the male lead commit a bigger mistake so the focus is shifted on him and everything else is forgotten 😆 Dev has gone crazy and he needs therapy. And am 100 percent sure this behavior of his will not be glorified at the end of this track he will be made to realise he is going overboard and suffocating his wife in the name of love. He needs therapy and assurance. What about Sonakshi? I made a post about this yesterday. Why is this being made about woman empowerment and financial independence? Dev may be a lot of things but he is not a chauvinist. He loves the fact that Sona is successful I'm her career. So I found it absolutely ridiculous that they had an argument about women having an identity of their own. And why is there no focus on Sonakshi's lack of reactions? She found out Vicky made them homeless and shifted the blame on her husband as a consequence of which she and her daughter were separated from Dev for 7 years. She also found out that Vicky still tried to destroy her husband even after she gave him a chance. Where is her reaction to this? How come Dev's behavior manages to extract more disgust and anger from Sonakshi than everything Vicky had done in the past 2 days? How come Sonakshi is more compassionate and perceptive with literally everyone apart from her husband? Trust me am not going Dev a free pass. He was always crazy and now it's gotten worse cos no one from his family bothered to correct his behavior. His mom in fact fueled it in the past cos it suited her purpose. But as much as Dev is going out of control, am just not able to understand Sonakshi. If Dev needs to tone it down, Sona really needs to be given better dialogues and made more expressive for god's sake. I can understand if Dev was always like this or Sona had enough being compassionate and understanding. But am yet to see Sona even try. Hell am yet to see if Sona even understands that Dev is being abnormal. It's sad that even Vicky and Elena have more meaningful conversations these days. I know the track needs to play out but can we please have our old Dev and Sona back? A more compassionate Sona followed by a less crazy Dev? Cos I will be really disappointed if this track just ends with Dev learning to be normal and sane without having any effect on Sona's stoic character.

Originally posted by: timbarucha83

Sona's this behaviour is the out come of her last 7 years where she want to obtain the position which will make bose family safe from finantial point of view. In short she has become s1 dev .and from bus incidencs also dev's focous is only sona. But i think when soha will get caught while cheating then they will come back in the sence and act together.

She is still not out of the things which she required to hear for her family .So she want to achive the sucess by her own.some how dev and sona is not aware about what golu is doing in their absence. But very soon they will force to look in the matter.

I had decided that I wuldnt make any post on any thread or IF mainly because I find it very upsetting that nowadatys whatever Sona does everyone thinks she is wrong. I read some really scathing posts against her and felt the need to say something at least. Look at her she has managed on her own for the last seven years. She has brought up her daughter by herself (with her parents helping her out). I am not sure how much her brother helps out with the work. Sonakshi felt she was responsible for her family's troubles and that's the reason she worked hard to bring them out of the financial mess.

Now seven years later, Dev and Sona decide to get back together. However, now Dev feels she should let her work take a backseat and she should be a housewife.
I have been working full time since the last 15 or 16 years. My husband supports me very much and I actually end up working many more hours than him. However, this has, thankfuly, never been an issue between us. I would also like to mention that my parents stay with me most of the time and my parents don't keep good health and they need frequent doctors visits and hospitals.

@asha- I can't speak for others but I can clarify what issues I have with Sona. That in no way implies that I condone Dev's behavior. He is crazy and needs therapy. I have always maintained that. In fact right after the first break up when Dev lost his head, I have always felt he needs counseling cos his abandonment issues seemed to be too deep rooted. My biggest grouse with Sonakshi or rather the writers is that she is almost emotionless now. And gets the worst dialogues on the show. Why is she not shown reacting to anything? Getting almost molested, her cabin catching fire, Vicky throwing them out of their house and shifting the blame on Dev, Vicky trying to steal the software and destroy Dev-literally nothing affects her anymore. If Dev is in one extreme, Sona is in the other. This track is honestly not about her career or ambition and I have no idea why it is being made into that in the first place. I can understand if Dev was always an unrelenting psycho or Sona has tried hard to understand him and be compassionate to his disturbed state of mind and has had enough but I don't even see her trying. Rather I have no idea what she wants or what she thinks cos the writers just don't care. Sona was an amazing character and I want to see more of her and her thought process. Which is not just confined to lectures on woman empowerment. I'd really like to know what goes on in her head and where she stands in this relationship. That is my biggest grouse with Sona and the track. Cos am pretty sure Dev will be made to change and apologise at the end of this track.