Originally posted by: LiveLife321
Glad to see you back being part of analysis and discussion my friend.
Sam and dq, thank you and also congratulations.
Thank you for providing this sane place which is just filled with healthy discussions between open minded people who are willing to listen and agree to disagree with respect when others views doesn't match with them.
Congratulations for pulling out so many silent members from their silence as well as old members from their hibernate mode.
Really happy to see many feathers getting added in to the hat(this thread). Great going guys.
Thank YOU Latha. This is everyone's contribution.
Originally posted by: aaliah3108
hello everyone.
I have been away from the forum for quite sometime now due to personal commitments. Have been an ardent reader of the views/ discussions on this thread specially.
Thanks for starting and continuing it all this while.
Hi Ruchi
I am DQ.. a bit crazy J
See you around
Yeah, me neither. Gives me a headache
I agree with your thoughts on Elena. I won't say that was a fake scene. Asha picked on the oddity immediately and Sona and Bijoy had their fair share of concerns. It's payback time for Elena (like other viewers said she has used Dev for 6 years now. And she didn't hesitate in using Sonakshi ever either). Ishwari and Dev are quick movers and they used the opportunity for their advantage. I will cheer for Sonakshi if she gives Elena a piece of her mind for turning up to spy on them.
So Elena who knows the Dixit for months stayed solid with them and Dev (who is also equally victimized by his mom/GKB/Vicky) is been penalized? Where is the fairness? If they can forgive and forget Elena's deception, why not give Dev a chance to explain his part of the story?
Great point. We however don't know how much each of them know. Elena for example abandoned them however as far as Boses know, Dev actually got them evacuated.
Originally posted by: Danseuse
What is important to understand is that all successful marriages have one thing in common. One of the spouse is a good listener, patient, tolerant and willingly sacrifices. If both are headstrong, hot tempered or poor listeners etc, marriages won't last. One of them has to give in and let the other person win. One has to be calm when the other is agitated. That's why the word 'better half' is coined. If you look at Elena's marriage, she has sacrificed - her family. I want to know more about Neha and how did she handle her life! That would be interesting.
-Rekha
Rekha, you know me and my love of the love languages/love tank theory. Successful marriages don't always have the same spouse doing all the sacrificing. Most successful marriages have both the spouses speaking each other's love language and topping up the love tank at regular intervals. The problem for Devkashi was they were only 3-4 months in their marriage and only just beginning to understand how to fill the other's love tank. However, it was a snap decision and the split. If they were given time, the emotional debt they were overdue would have normalised.
Originally posted by: aaliah3108
No one in real life gives up on a three month old marriage so soon. No one.
The slap gate incident was kind of portrayed as intentional from Dev's side ... but what if something else had happened? Involuntary involvement... what do u do then ? Curse the person and break all ties ??
Ruchi, this is precisely my biggest disappointment with Devakshi and their families. No one and I mean not even sensible people like mamaji (I have started doubting his sensibility but that is for a later day) and asha and kishu bhaiya tried a patchup! As you say, 3 months is such a short span of time. To quote a stand-up comedian - "6 maheene to hawa hee nahi lagtee". They had started coming together, however, as Sam says, the leap was jutted in leaving some of us shocked. I mean where is the sincerity in all this. Dev should have printed and laminated this around his house "When I am angry, I do unreasonable things. Ignore me and if possible help me calm down. Then we will have a conversation.". However, that then brings us to Sam's post.
Originally posted by: Samanalyse
Hey all! I am having a bit of an insane week, so won't be on here too much until the weekend, but I have loved catching up on the discussions! After I saw the episode yesterday, my knee-jerk reaction was also disappointment in the Boses as many of you have expressed here. I was absolutely apalled that Bijoy's big plan to conceal Soha involved playing hide-and-seek. And Elena's remark about the Dixits/Tripathis being opportunists was a hoot coming from the woman who has shamelessly availed of free childcare for 6 years. On top of that, everyone from Dixit parivar was on their A-game where it came to manipulation and deceit so I ended up feeling very cynical about the episode But when I slept on it, the morning brought a fresh perspective, especially on Sona.
Here's the thing: I think Sona is leaving the door open for Dev. She's not inviting him in, or telling him that she wants him to come, but she is leaving the door open in case he wants to use it. When this explanation came to mind, a lot of things fell into place for me, including the new spoiler about Sona bringing Soha to the doorstep of IN. During her story about the surajmukhi as well, Sona stated that she waited for Dev after their separation, for days, weeks, a year. She also left the option open for Soha to meet her father when they came to Delhi. What she is not willing to do is take the initiative herself to invite Dev back into their lives. She wants him to bang down the door and decide for himself that he wants her. Remember, she still believes that he is under Ishwari's thumb, so she has been holding herself back for the past seven years from repeating the mistake she made after the first break-up -- letting Dev back into her life when she wasn't totally sure about his feelings.
In a previous post, I mentioned my definition of "dil ke faisle" vs. "dimag ke faisle." From both Dev and Sona's side, the decision to get married was one they took out of fear of losing each other, and the motivations of that decision defined their entire marriage. Becasue of that fear, they were unable to be honest in their communication, which ultiamately doomed their relationship. By going back to the beginning, Sona is demanding that Dev make a "dil ka faisla," one in active pursuit of his happiness rather than one taken out of fear of losing her. The ramifications of Sona's stance are complex and debatable, especially where what's best for Soha, and fair to Dev is concerned, but it helps me to understand where she is coming from.
Like we have discussed, Sona was very scared from the beginning to bare her vulnerabilities. Even when she first fell in love with Dev, she convinced herself that it was pointless to confess to him, but much like she is doing now, left the door open for him to claim the love that was there in her heart. For a person who has that fear in the first place, to put themselves out there is out of character and after coming out of that comfort zone, to have your heart broken to bits makes you recede further into your safe shell. That is where Sona is now -- afraid to trust or depend on anyone.That is why it has to be Soha's decision explicitly to meet Dev, because Sona is so scared that if she initiates contact, it will come off as her using Soha to get close to Dev, and she isn't willing to leave any loopholes in her approach to him. It's all or nothing, she has made her peace with nothing, and she refuses to settle for anything else.
Bijoy senses this and is absolutely horrified by it. He wants to shut that door forever to keep his daughter and grandaughter away from Dev and the Dixits at all costs (Sona marrying Jatin is his answer to this). He knows that once Dev finds out about Soha, the jig is up. It's only a matter of time before Dev is back in their lives. The part of Sona that is Bijoy's daughter is also scared, that Dev will take Soha away from her and she will be left with nothing, but as it is plain for us to see, that is not the part of her making the big decisions -- to come back to Delhi, back to their same old house, and to stand firm in the office she shares with Dev. I am beginning to see that this is a very deliberate tight-rope walk on Sona's part. Much like us, she seems to be waiting for the axe to drop but is unwilling to let go of the rope herself.
Indeed. I had hoped that Dev & Sonakshi will first deal with their own inherent insecurities which manifest in the form of their families, before the infertility track starts. As you see them more and more, you can comprehend why their patch-ups were so lukewarm. Inherently they really got each other's thought process and as soon as they got together after an argument, they would have a quick patch up because (to quote) "dil" would take over the "dimag". This swinging between Dev-sona and Bose-Dixit really affected their interactions at a much deeper level. Here you have Suhana - who is every bit a Devakshi and very little of Boxit!
Originally posted by: Samanalyse
Why Dev didn't pursue Sona to see if the door was open is another topic for another day.
Curious to know what your take on Dev is
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