RiKara FS - Jo Na Keh Sake Hum Part 5 on Pg 15 (30/09) Complete

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Naina

@Naina280599

Inactive

Posted: 7 years ago

#31

Genie 🤗
It feels so good to have you back. Hope you and your family are well; heard about the hurricanes. Take care.
I am in love with this FS already. The title is so lovely, brings so many feels. The first part was wonderfully written. Loved how you portrayed Gauri's thoughts, feelings, emotions, inner turmoil and her beliefs with the words so amazingly well. I'm glad she said she wants a break and she left for Bareilly. I wanted a separation since so long in the show; Sigh! Moving on to the next part; I've always loved your choice of words, specially when explaining Om's perspective. I loved reading his thoughts, his feelings, specially how he missed his wife, he kept on looking for her subconsciously and that he finally knows he has to bring her back. It's high time he opens up to her and I'm already anxious to know how you'll go on with this. It is so beautifully written.
Thanks a ton, for the PM.
Much love ❤️

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music1

@music1

Dazzler

Posted: 7 years ago

#32

Om's POV has been clearly stated .. Now we get to know how insecure and broken he is from inside.. Thanks for the update .. Waiting for their reunion patiently:)

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AparnaChinnu

@AparnaChinnu

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#33

Awesome update yar...

Totally loved it...

you beautifully portrayed om's emotions yar...

Ya he is so broken...he had only seen the bad side of relationships...he witnessed the pain his mother had gone through because of the commitment and heis too afraid

so he grown up developing a commitophobic... and riddhima and ishaana increased it and he totally changed into another version of SSO and gauri paid for it... he MU her...insulted her but she forgive him... gauri changed him but he doesn't realised it because he is the same om who we met at the beginning... he changed in to SSO version and gauri brought the real om back... but for him he is the same... gauri had taken the right decision... only her absence taught him wat she means to him

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Tasnim

@tasnimrodela

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 7 years ago

#34

Again you made me fall for your writing..you wrote the best of Omkara's perspective...he was always a commitment phobic because of the experience he had from his parents relationship...but he didn't deny the fact that she's the first who made him comfortable without entering his personal space...glad that you didn't use the word "Love" when he realised how much he need her...though they comfort each other, they have a long journey before declaring their mutual feeling as love..continue soonish...and hope you're well...just take care of yourself and your family... 😊

Edited by tasnimrodela - 7 years ago

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Roaiba

@roaiba

Explorer

Posted: 7 years ago

#35

This was so heart wrenching yet so beautiful! 👏 Would've loved to see this kind of conversation between RiKara. Even though it really hurts to read this, I know this is what they need, this is what HE needs and you explained it so beautifully 😭 I'm seriously speechless 👏

About part 2: AGAIN, S.P.E.E.C.H.L.E.S.S! Damn, how do you do it? How do you portray someone's emotions so well? It is just beyond my understanding. You have described his thoughts and emotions so well! This is some whole other level of writing. This is just W.O.W! 👏 👏 👏

Edited by roaiba - 7 years ago

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Srivalli

@Srivalli.t

Rocker

Posted: 7 years ago

#36

Awesome update.

Loved it..

Very beautifully written.

Thanks for d pm:)

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rikara94

@Raghav_Rao

Sparkler

Posted: 7 years ago

#37

Wohooo again intersting and amazing update

This shot totally on omkara..and you described his emotions and point of view very well genie..beautifully written👍🏼

We already knw that he has commitment phobia and this is just becoz he seen only the bad sides of realtionships..pain in relationships and fights in relationships..so that is why he is borken soul..and about ishana and riddhima both girls only increased his pain and his past is the reason he does not trust gauri..always misunderstood her *sigh*

So now he realised her value in her absence..achi bat hai

Yarr show mein bhi aisa milta toh omkara ko realize hota kuch but nahh😒

Anyways update soon hann

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Genie

@writergenie17

Voyager

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#38

Originally posted by: KrazyKripzy

Loved how you portrayed Omkara's emotions with so much justice! Some words were very philosophical and had me in a whole different level! This was by far the best on how Omkara's perspective could be written. I have always hated the fact that Om didn't treat Gauri's well but I never really hated Om for that because this is exactly how a victim of parent's broken marriage, a commitment phobic person works. And this did so much justice to Om. And we all know, of the three brothers, Omkara's dreads the fact that the innocent being punished the most, with the whole Prinku Car accident fiasco. I am sure now, Om redeems to redeem properly, without any in between. I really appreciate the fact that you haven't given 'love' as the name of their relationship, because like you mentioned, their relationship has crossed the whole area of complexities and has more bitterness to it, that calling it love immediately would not be right. I accept with O's realisation, all the bitterness would be gone soon, but we still have to endure the aftertaste😆 loved this very much and update soonish!
Thanks for pm😳

Love,
Kripa❤️

P.S. First comment again

Wow Kripa... aap ne to mera dil khush kar diya! 🤗

It is so amazing to read comments from you guys when you manage to wring out every bit of meaning from my words. I am very happy that the Omki centric chapter was so well received.

Thanks for the lovely comment and your in-depth analysis of the situation. I really don't think Omkaa at least is in love yet. Gauri might be in a version of love which she thinks is devotion but neither of them understand enough about their feelings at the moment to call it love... especially these two who are so good at gyaan baantofying but no good at gyaan self-application.

Anyways, next chapter is gonna be action packed... so stay tuned!

p.s. Phir se first hone ki badhaai... party kab de rahe ho? 😆

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Genie

@writergenie17

Voyager

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#39

Originally posted by: minamma
You go om
Get your girl
Soon

I think he's taking your advice seriously.

Agle chapter mein dekhte hian kya hota hai... 😃

Thanks for a lovely comment and stay tuned for more real soon!

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Genie

@writergenie17

Voyager

+ 3

Posted: 7 years ago

#40

Originally posted by: GoWithTheRhythm
Wonderful wonderful!!
Loved each word
How you described omkara and his inner turmoil :D loved it
But since I am a non hindi speaker a few parts were not understandable but still good
Keep going :D

Thanks a lot for the lovely comment hun! I love your handle btw...

I'm very glad you liked the story so far. Omki is so interesting isn't it? On the show KJ is so good at microexpressions and top-notch acting when dialogue is not present or inadequate. But Omkara's thoughts and feelings are pretty much never explored on the show so we fanfic writers have to do it for us all.

I went back over the chapter and since there were no dialogues, there's absolutely no hindi in the previous chapter. If you're talking about the first chapter, I apologize but I find that writing at least Gauri's dialogues in English takes away from her character. If you need any clarification, feel free to PM me.

Stay tuned for an update soon!

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RiKara FS - Jo Na Keh Sake Hum Part 5 on Pg 15 (30/09) Complete - Page 4

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