Why do you think Virat loves Sai? - Page 3

Originally posted by: sherry_24

In my opinion he loves her. But no one person is similar and neither is their perspective or ways of functioning. The problem actually lies in the setup that this love blossomed. If it had been a regular love story without any of the baggage, things would have been different. His actions here are directly/indirectly linked to the confusion, insecurity and uncertainty looming over their relationship. His immaturity and irrational behaviour stems out from his fears. If they were secure and sure in their relationship with an open and clear communication, things would have been different. So for me, he is in love, but on a very shaky stage where he doesn’t really know how to handle it and is reacting purely out of impulse.

Its not about today, I was talking about it all in general.. The reason why I denied it call it love during Holi was because no man in love would disrespect a woman who is wife's mother figure in any situation..would not throw them out late at night, deny them food, shelter.. No man in love can do that.... I somehow could understand his insecurities during Ajinkya track, but my reason to deny during holi was certainly because he was not in love then.. Honestly in terms of what all has happened and what is still happening in this house with Sai, I dont see much change in those feelings, he grew more fond ofcourse, because he saw her selfishness every other day.. but I fail to club his feelings under love, because he has always failed to understand her insecurities and also the daayra he needs to maintain with his ex..He is still failing there....

He loves her in his definition and since he now "loves" he expects her to act on his whims, sacrifice for him, doubts her while being "friends" with his ex. He doesn't know what love is, he thought two day yoga attraction was love so we can't expect much from him 😆

In case of Sai, it's attraction mixed with habit. He's habitual of her and has affinity towards her.

Virat is a polished man who's misogynistic at the core. I hope nobody has forgotten him denying her food or kicking her out of the house amongst other things. He kind of tries to portray himself as all-sacrificing ideal hero in front of everyone. Some scenes, idk what it the writing or the general character, Virat cribs about Sai not loving him as if she owes him that.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

@bold1 He was possessive for her as a husband and love or not, husband would be always possessive...If a man comes claiming Ashwini to be his lost love, you will see even Ninad getting possessive.. What happened during Amey's track it was mostly to do with his possessiveness as a husband..Good or bad all husbands are possessive when a new man is in picture..There is no standing of "love" there.

@bold2 In his head that's the definition of love, from my point of view, he has still not reached there..

Originally posted by: Kumuda-123

In that stage it was not only about possessiveness. He wanted to have dinner with her declining his officer lunch offer, whole day thought about her & wanted to know how her hand is. Wanted to be part of her journey for the reason which he is unknown when sai talked about leaving house after chilli grind scene. Didn't ate whole day thinking sai wouldn't have eaten anything during sai fever phase. I'm sure ninad wouldn't have done all these for aswini.

I never said it was just possessiveness at that satge..I started my post saying he began with feeling protective for her... I am just saying that way he was getting close to her.. he had been always caring ,concerned and protective towards her...how can one forget the car scene.. I was just saying that his reaction for the first time during Amey's kaand was as a husband and not as a guardian.. He would have schooled her getting into trouble then but would not have reacted the way he reacted there...Ofcourse he was getting attracted to her.. He got attracted to her the first time she landed in his arms because a chipkali..

Originally posted by: Kumuda-123

In that stage it was not only about possessiveness. He wanted to have dinner with her declining his officer lunch offer, whole day thought about her & wanted to know how her hand is. Wanted to be part of her journey for the reason which he is unknown when sai talked about leaving house after chilli grind scene. Didn't ate whole day thinking sai wouldn't have eaten anything during sai fever phase. I'm sure ninad wouldn't have done all these for aswini.

Ofcourse I am not comparing him with Ninad, what I am saying is , it has always been much more than fondness, I have listed the feelings that he feels for her...but I fail to see it as love..

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

I have added the feelings that I see in Virat, but being in love myself I cant call it love yet.. He comes from a very conservative family, in any case he did not meet Pakhi, he would have had an arrange marriage and would have grown to be "in love" with the woman he was married to.. For sure he would not have been a Ninad Chavan, but surely would have his elements, like he has every now and then.The love that in general husband has for his wife and not the love we are talking about..Also in the case he married Sai , in absence of Pakhi's presence in his life, in the same circumstances , even then he would have started with his marital life when Sai was ready, since there was no question of deal.. So the Virat right now , I see him as the same man, who got fond of the woman, attracted to her , was anyway protective from the very beginning and also grew possessive the way a husband would be..

Why I feel he is still not in "love" with Sai is for the fact that he fails to see her as an equal, as someone who he can communicate with, someone who needs his transparency. Just as he wants from her.. Also he has had failed to understand her and her insecurities for him in general. Sai has been in that regard very perceptive, since the beginning of the marriage , even though it was not real in her head, every time she saw him feeling jealous of a man...She has given proper and adequate answers to it, whenever he would ask. Even though she would club it with "why it matters to you" , she would address his concerns with clarity. Virat has somehow failed there..

Also he has fought for her respect in the family yes, but more than fighting for it, he has let his family disrespect her and also participated in doing so...He has always let his best friend abuse, harass his wife, infront of her , behind her...and he still choses to be civil with her..Any man in love would not let that happen at any cost.. However how ugly fight I have had with mine, he would not let anyone, not even family members insult me...a vile ex is out of question... Virat in general lets it happen, even when he is good terms with Sai.. I do not attribute it to him being in love... No woman gets to talk nonsense with your love, your wife, treat her the way she is treated.. by Pakhi..FOr instance how dare she taunt Sai, she is Virat's wife and she can talk on behalf of him and he on behalf of her, even when they are at loggerheads...Angry or not I dont relate with it...

Also These statements that Sai makes, he lets it go just like that ...For instance the other day she said, she would never be accepted as a bahu, he says, she needs to adjust and today when she said, that if he gets late, no one is going to say anything to her, but for her, it will be more like a crime... The CVs let these questions go and so does Virat.....

I see the most important elements of love lacking in Virat...Trust, understanding and respect.

Tagging you here... I dont see love as hunky dory thingy..Its complicated, its messy, it torturous and its difficult to sustain... I have myself been in it for 9 years...was a teenager when I started ..

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

Honestly, I dont really want the love to be compared to Pakhi, because I treat it as wakti fitoor...One thing that I agree with when it comes to vile woman.. I just am confused on where does his protective side, safeguarding her respect goes when she is being attacked.. He does realise that his vehni does not go through the atrocities that his wife goes through and she needs to have some slack cut down there...

I think it's a combination of guilt and pity.. that makes him support Pakhi...

But what ever it is revolting and wish he cuts her off completely from his life..

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

Ofcourse I am not comparing him with Ninad, what I am saying is , it has always been much more than fondness, I have listed the feelings that he feels for her...but I fail to see it as love..

Originally posted by: Amor_fati

I think it's a combination of guilt and pity.. that makes him support Pakhi...

But what ever it is revolting and wish he cuts her off completely from his life..

So he should feel more pity and guilty when it comes to Sai.. She is being abused by his ex because of him..Its his family who harasses her..And she has no family to go back to since she lost her father, ..not because of him, but in a way he did take the shot for him....SHould he not be more guilty for her seeing so much in this family, where he is an indirect reason... Is it not the case?

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

I have added the feelings that I see in Virat, but being in love myself I cant call it love yet.. He comes from a very conservative family, in any case he did not meet Pakhi, he would have had an arrange marriage and would have grown to be "in love" with the woman he was married to.. For sure he would not have been a Ninad Chavan, but surely would have his elements, like he has every now and then.The love that in general husband has for his wife and not the love we are talking about..Also in the case he married Sai , in absence of Pakhi's presence in his life, in the same circumstances , even then he would have started with his marital life when Sai was ready, since there was no question of deal.. So the Virat right now , I see him as the same man, who got fond of the woman, attracted to her , was anyway protective from the very beginning and also grew possessive the way a husband would be..

Why I feel he is still not in "love" with Sai is for the fact that he fails to see her as an equal, as someone who he can communicate with, someone who needs his transparency. Just as he wants from her.. Also he has had failed to understand her and her insecurities for him in general. Sai has been in that regard very perceptive, since the beginning of the marriage , even though it was not real in her head, every time she saw him feeling jealous of a man...She has given proper and adequate answers to it, whenever he would ask. Even though she would club it with "why it matters to you" , she would address his concerns with clarity. Virat has somehow failed there..

Also he has fought for her respect in the family yes, but more than fighting for it, he has let his family disrespect her and also participated in doing so...He has always let his best friend abuse, harass his wife, infront of her , behind her...and he still choses to be civil with her..Any man in love would not let that happen at any cost.. However how ugly fight I have had with mine, he would not let anyone, not even family members insult me...a vile ex is out of question... Virat in general lets it happen, even when he is good terms with Sai.. I do not attribute it to him being in love... No woman gets to talk nonsense with your love, your wife, treat her the way she is treated.. by Pakhi..FOr instance how dare she taunt Sai, she is Virat's wife and she can talk on behalf of him and he on behalf of her, even when they are at loggerheads...Angry or not I dont relate with it...

Also These statements that Sai makes, he lets it go just like that ...For instance the other day she said, she would never be accepted as a bahu, he says, she needs to adjust and today when she said, that if he gets late, no one is going to say anything to her, but for her, it will be more like a crime... The CVs let these questions go and so does Virat.....

I see the most important elements of love lacking in Virat...Trust, understanding and respect.

@bold: Well summarised Asmi❤️

The thing is, chalo he lets the elders in his family slide in the taunts and occasional disrespect at times considering that's how they are (even then, only the ones questioning her lack of choice of respectful words or actions having a direct negative impact on the family are done. Not the ones questioning her position as a wife or partner or what they do in their personal space) but him letting Pakhi do the same is where he goes totally wrong as a husband/friend/Guardian to Sai.

Adding some more thoughts to your above post:

In anger he has always let Pakhi take a hold of his emotions and steer them even more negatively towards disastrous actions. It's happened quite a many times, she is no friend to him so many times she has humiliated him in front of the family with taunts just to prove her points and put him and his wife down in the eyes of the family.

The whole Cafe kaarnama if not anything should have existed to draw the right lines irrespective of whether Sai loves him or not. Pakhi has time and again acted immature, been extremely ruthless in her words and steering towards bad actions for him. What on earth allows him to give her so much leeway?

Even if him and Sai confess love to each other today, this relationship will remain a stalemate, love alone is never enough to spend a lifetime with someone.

His love for Sai will start the right journey towards a life filled with respect, trust and love only when he truly puts Pakhi as a KBA with the right words and actions. Till he lets Pakhi get away with crap, Sai will stay insecure no matter how deeply they bond physically or emotionally because here he has clear double standards for her and P. And if wants to be a friend to P and a husband/lover to Sai, he has to draw clear respectable boundaries & those boundaries need to be explained and understood by his wife not his BFF otherwise they are meaningless.