My Fallen Angel- chapter 8 Pg (41) - Page 2

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Posted: 12 years ago
#11
🤢

Originally posted by: Cheryth

RES*

Mads
I'll read and comment tomorrow ok 🤗

EDIT*


Hey Disha
Guess what? I got the first page
and Woo Hoo AM SECOND 🥳


Thank You sooo much for the PM Hun🤗

Title of the new SS/FF: I simply Love the Title ❤️; Fallen angel (completely my sort of thing) - mysterious, alluring and exciting all at once...

The character sketch: It seems interesting and I love how you've made Payal and Akash play a more vital role in this story also me likey how you've made them BOTH elders 😊!!! Khushi is a fashion designer and our Heart Throb, our ASR is a physiotherapist?😲
Hmmm, That's an intriguing change Hun
Also, I would love to know more about the adorable Sia and her pranks with her maasi
She sounds endearing already 😃
I simply adore the fact that Khushi and Akash seem to share a good brother-sister bond too
That's surely a lovely change Hun 😊

Prologue: It's kind of heart-breaking Mads, Khushi and Payal lost their parents and Khushi was a sole witness to it (which explains her non-khushi self and her nightmares)😔
Sigh* What could be worse and more life changing than to be a witness to an accident that takes away your loved ones, your beloved parents😭
Many just wish they didn't survive
Hence, I understand her pain
At least Payal has Akash with her innit
But, Khushi
And OMG She's paralysed? Oh, that's distressing Disha
It broke me 💔

But, the ending sure gave me hope
Am guessing Akash's call was to his brother, Arnav who in this story is a Physiotherapist?
I have a feeling things are going to be taking an interesting turn😉
Is Arnav going to be Khushi's doctor?
Oooh... That'll sure be out of teh ordinary😆
I can't wait to read more Hun
I love your work
You do know that right?😳
Hehe

Overall, Another one of your work of art👏
And I can't wait to be a witness to this mysterious journey
You've written the chapter beautifully Hun...
Flawless writing!!!⭐️

Please do continue soon
Please. Please. Please!!!!😳

P.S: Don't neglect ACTH though sweetie ok... You must know it's my first love out of your work on IF *giggles* Do update that soon too Hun🤗

Imma eagerly waiting...

Love ya sis
T.C
Cheers


xx



Yeah, you like it? *double dance*
hehe, can always count on you right? That silver comment that keeps me going and wanting to update faster?

It's quite loosely based on a personal experience (had this really hot physiotherapist for a knee injury😉😳)

Thank you sooo much😃

Love youuu🤗

P.S haww, dont even THINK that! I would never forget ACTH! Its my first baby😉
Edited by Madafterarhi - 12 years ago
Lavi_961 thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#12
Hey. Gd start! Luking frwrd to the story! AM Lavanya n wd like to knw ur name..
723461 thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#13

Originally posted by: Lavi_961

Hey. Gd start! Luking frwrd to the story! AM Lavanya n wd like to knw ur name..


Hi lavanya, I'm DIsha. It's really nice to know you😊

Sit tight, i am just updating😆
723461 thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#14
Lucky you people...I am so excited to write this story and seeing your overwhelming response has made me want to update faster!

Le extraordinaire isn't it? Someone who's lazy as a slug...updating in less than a day!

So a worry of my mind, thank God my amazing readers liked the idea of physio Arnav...wanted to try something different, hope this turns out the way I want in my head
Enough of my bak bak, here goes:


Chapter 1


When it was dark, you always carried the sun in your hand for me
And the world was brighter. Thank you.
-Sean O' Casey




"Chote, I'm not going to allow you to rush off without eating breakfast this time! You've just returned home from London after 6 years, let me pamper and fatten you up a bit...these doctors, they think they're off to save the world and in the process don't take care of themselves! Anjali rambled on as she limped heavily across the room trying to chase her workaholic brother. He was dumping wrinkled clothes into a suitcase and searching for his cellphone, but before she could stop him, he whirled around.


"Di! I'm only staying at Bhai's house...I'm sure he will make sure I dont starve" Arnav stated as he rolled his eyes at his sister's dramatics. "and besides", he continued, "I've heard Payal Bhabhi makes the most scrumptious food..."


"Now Payal's jalebies and pakoras..." Anjali whispered in awe as her eyes glazed over and her face held sheer longing as if in a dreamy trance, rubbing her tummy. She snapped out of it when she saw his face. "Well, she can make them just as mouthwatering sugar free, Chote."

Arnav chuckled and shook his head fondly. Pregnant woman and their absurd cravings.


"I'll bring you some the next time I come home okay?" he consented as Anjali's face lit up like a child on Christmas.


"I swear, the one good thing my useless twin brother has done, was marry Payal. When I bite into one of her jalebies, I feel like I'm having an orgasm. Not that your Jeejaji doesn't do a good job..." she winked mischeviously.

"Eww, Di too much info!" Arnav cringed at the thought as he bolted down the stairs, Anjali in tow.

"What has my wife done now?" Shaleen smiled at the horrified look on Arnav's face.


"Just telling him what a stud you are" Anjali stated proudly.

"Am I now?" Shaleen teased as he pulled her closer. Arnav stared open mouthed for a minute before he quickly turned away, embarrassed.

These two were crazy! In love, he thought, sighing heavily. He'd been in a lot of relationships, but never found someone who could make his heart flutter like crazy, think about only her and forget the rest of the world.

He'd never fallen in love.

Little did he know that he'd fall so hard, it would bruise him...



"Chote?" His Di's voice broke his reverie. "Did Akash tell you why he wanted you to stay with them?" she asked as she walked toward him.

"Yeah, Payal Bhabhi's sister suffers from temparory paralysis, he wants me to treat her" he replied.

"Yes, Khushi, she's a sweetheart. So sad to have something that horrible happen to her..."


Khushi...the name held innocence and tranquility and in that moment, Arnav knew he had to get to know the person behind that name...

"Right Di, now I've really gotta rush. Bye Jeeju!" He shouted as he hugged his sister and dashed out the door.

***********


Akash's house was quite far away, away from the chaos and hullabaloo of the city, a sprawling bungalow amidst breathtaking greenery, designed by Payal herself. As Arnav reached the mansion, he was about to ring the bell, when he heard the most melodious sound-- tinkling laughter which rang in his ears like a bell chime. Mesmerized, he followed the direction of the sound, to the back of the house, and sucked in a breath.

Because in front of him was the most beautiful sight he had ever seen. Dark, silken brown hair cascaded down slender shoulders, garnishing itself around her petite waist. Her creamy cheeks were flushed crimson with laughter while large, round hazel orbs danced in amusement as they looked down on the miniature girl in her lap. Entranced, he was about to step further, when those expressive eyes flashed up to his face, immediately widening in fear as her arms automatically hugged the little child closer to her chest.

"Maasi, don't be scared" the tiny creature in the girl's lap announced boldly. Turning her little torso, the small girl fixed Arnav with a questioning glare. She crossed her tiny arms across her chest and asked him authoritatively.

"Who are you?" with a quirked eyebrow. She looked so much like Akash in that moment, that Arnav almost laughed. But seeing her blazing glare, he controlled himself.


Arnav raised his hands up in assurance, and opened his mouth to speak--

"Arnavv!!" Akash's booming voice broke his trance as he turned around in surprise.

"Bhai!" Arnav greeted his brother warmly and hugged him. "ir's been so long and I'm so glad I finally saw you! Can't wait to meet Bhabhi!


"You mean, you can't wait to gobble her cooked food right, you sly little rat?" Akash smirked as he smacked him on the head.

"Same thing Bhai.." Arnav mumbled, rubbing his head, embarassed at being caught. Di must have called Bhai and told him about what he said at home.

Arghh, how much he hated this twin connection!

"This is Sia, my cute monster. Don't get on her bad side, or you're in for it!" Akash said mock sternly as he introduced the frightening little girl and ruffled her curly hair. Sia reached out from her Maasi's lap as Akash let her cling to his neck.

"Looks like I already have, Bhai," thought Arnav looking at her nervously.


"And this is, the one and only, Khushi, my adorable Saali. Khushi, that's Arnav, my younger brother."


They stared back at each other, oblivious to the fact that Cupid had already chosen his targets and shot the arrow.



You know the drill. Read and revieww

I've kind of made Arnav the happy one here, with less inhibitions as you all have seen. Now he's got to break down Khushi's walls and help her through the rubble. Can he?

Love,
Disha
Edited by Madafterarhi - 12 years ago
Cheryth thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Explorer Thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#15
RES*

EDIT*

WoooHooo🥳
Am First
Hahaha
Bull's eye
Last time I was the second and this time I am ACTUALLY the FIRST?😲
Damn Stalking sure pays off good don't it 😉 LOL

Honestly Disha I was shocked when I saw you've updated
Had to rub my drowsy eyes a few times to make sure am not in dreamland
But, Today earth itself seem to sport heaven
Sigh*

Uhm Uhm... Coming to the chapter
I love the light heartedness you've brought into the story
With the slight gloomy atmosphere It's nice to have some glow in the story Hun😊
and Arnav's change is just the cherry on top😛
It's a dazzling transformation
And like you said a needed one...

I actually like everything about this story of yours you know?
Correction... I LOVE everything!!!

First and Foremost I wanna ask you
Anjali and Akash are twins? I Repeat TWINS?😲
Seriously?
Awww
Isn't that just adorable
The two are actually TWINS
Who'd have guessed😉
It's surely a winning change Mads👍🏼

I love how Anjali treats Arnav as if his a damn toddler, it's sweet and NOT annoying (like it some times does in the serial)😉
And Shaleen's portraying as her husband instead of Shyam? Awww That's a sweet amend yaar😃
Damn the sex references were hilarious
Actually, Arnav's reaction to it - amusing.
But, seriously Mads as much as I was enjoying the anecdotes I was both; laughing and yet grossed out at how Anjali referred to orgasms and Jalebis in ONE SENTENCE😆
Darn You just don't do that to FOOD woman!!! LMAO

I loved Arnav's small notion to himself after seeing Shaleen and Anjali
And then you say:
These two were crazy! In love, he thought, sighing heavily. He'd been in a lot of relationships, but never found someone who could make his heart flutter like crazy, think about only her and forget the rest of the world.

He'd never fallen in love.

Little did he know that he'd fall so hard, it would bruise him...
Hahaha, damn right girl😆

I also prized how just hearing Khushi's name Arnav thought of Khushi as a puzzle he just HAD to solve:
Khushi...the name held innocence and tranquility and in that moment, Arnav knew he had to get to know the person behind that name...
Awww so charming

I cherished each word you used to describe Akash's palace and our princess Khushi- so strikingly!!!❤️
I felt like I was their with them with the vivid and eloquent way you portrayed everything Hun
It was utterly well-written👏

Khushi was petrified at the mere sight of him
Sigh* she's hurt deep isn't she?

I love how little Sia was standing like a Knight in shining armour protecting her Maasi
That was darn cute man
Not fair -.- I wanna niece like that😭

Hahaha, Guess Payal's got Khushi's cooking skills in this SS/FF huh?
That both Anjali and Arnav seem to be smitten by the just the sheer thought of 'Payal's food'😆

I simply awww'd at Akash's introduction man
The way he described his cute monster Sia and adorable saali
That was just truly sweet

But what had me reeling with excitement was your ending
Wah. Wah What an ending Disha:
They stared back at each other, oblivious to the fact that Cupid had already chosen his targets and shot the arrow.
Obviously You are the cupid in this story innit LOL
You pagli
You are just one Brilliant and extraordinary Writer. BAS!!!⭐️

P.S: As for your question Of course he can help Khushi dammit!!! Is that even a question? ASR always WINS 😉😆

P.S.S: You were late with the PM Mads 😛 But Still Thank You sooo much for the PM Hun🤗
Overall, another one of your masterwork

Simply in love with it
And whilst Anjali's craving for jalebis and pakora's am craving for Chapter 2 -QUICK!!!😳

Love You sweetie
Cheers


~Cher
xx
Edited by Cheryth - 12 years ago
arhi10 thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Explorer Thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#16
luved sia n anjali...so cute!!!
NothingLasts thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail + 4
Posted: 12 years ago
#17
I liked it. Khushi dear don't be scared! Arnav is the best thing that will ever happen to you!
Reader_Hobby thumbnail
13th Anniversary Thumbnail Voyager Thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#18
Hey!
I can't believe Anjali was talking to Arnav about an orgasm 🤣
Of all the people she could've said such a thing to, it had to be her brother, Arnav 😆
Ah yesss ... the moment Khushi held her neice closer to her before knowing who Arnav was, I really felt my heart going to her. Bless. 😊 Sia was a little fireball! Maybe just like Arnav when he's angry, but then again we've not seen any anger from him as of yet ... who knows ...
Thanks for the PM.
723461 thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#19
👏

Originally posted by: Cheryth

RES*

EDIT*

WoooHooo🥳
Am First
Hahaha
Bull's eye
Last time I was the second and this time I am ACTUALLY the FIRST?😲
Damn Stalking sure pays off good don't it 😉 LOL

Honestly Disha I was shocked when I saw you've updated
Had to rub my drowsy eyes a few times to make sure am not in dreamland
But, Today earth itself seem to sport heaven
Sigh*

Uhm Uhm... Coming to the chapter
I love the light heartedness you've brought into the story
With the slight gloomy atmosphere It's nice to have some glow in the story Hun😊
and Arnav's change is just the cherry on top😛
It's a dazzling transformation
And like you said a needed one...

I actually like everything about this story of yours you know?
Correction... I LOVE everything!!!

First and Foremost I wanna ask you
Anjali and Akash are twins? I Repeat TWINS?😲
Seriously?
Awww
Isn't that just adorable
The two are actually TWINS
Who'd have guessed😉
It's surely a winning change Mads👍🏼

I love how Anjali treats Arnav as if his a damn toddler, it's sweet and NOT annoying (like it some times does in the serial)😉
And Shaleen's portraying as her husband instead of Shyam? Awww That's a sweet amend yaar😃
Damn the sex references were hilarious
Actually, Arnav's reaction to it - amusing.
But, seriously Mads as much as I was enjoying the anecdotes I was both; laughing and yet grossed out at how Anjali referred to orgasms and Jalebis in ONE SENTENCE😆
Darn You just don't do that to FOOD woman!!! LMAO

I loved Arnav's small notion to himself after seeing Shaleen and Anjali
And then you say:
These two were crazy! In love, he thought, sighing heavily. He'd been in a lot of relationships, but never found someone who could make his heart flutter like crazy, think about only her and forget the rest of the world.

He'd never fallen in love.

Little did he know that he'd fall so hard, it would bruise him...
Hahaha, damn right girl😆

I also prized how just hearing Khushi's name Arnav thought of Khushi as a puzzle he just HAD to solve:
Khushi...the name held innocence and tranquility and in that moment, Arnav knew he had to get to know the person behind that name...
Awww so charming

I cherished each word you used to describe Akash's palace and our princess Khushi- so strikingly!!!❤️
I felt like I was their with them with the vivid and eloquent way you portrayed everything Hun
It was utterly well-written👏

Khushi was petrified at the mere sight of him
Sigh* she's hurt deep isn't she?

I love how little Sia was standing like a Knight in shining armour protecting her Maasi
That was darn cute man
Not fair -.- I wanna niece like that😭

Hahaha, Guess Payal's got Khushi's cooking skills in this SS/FF huh?
That both Anjali and Arnav seem to be smitten by the just the sheer thought of 'Payal's food'😆

I simply awww'd at Akash's introduction man
The way he described his cute monster Sia and adorable saali
That was just truly sweet

But what had me reeling with excitement was your ending
Wah. Wah What an ending Disha:
They stared back at each other, oblivious to the fact that Cupid had already chosen his targets and shot the arrow.
Obviously You are the cupid in this story innit LOL
You pagli
You are just one Brilliant and extraordinary Writer. BAS!!!⭐️

P.S: As for your question Of course he can help Khushi dammit!!! Is that even a question? ASR always WINS 😉😆

P.S.S: You were late with the PM Mads 😛 But Still Thank You sooo much for the PM Hun🤗
Overall, another one of your masterwork

Simply in love with it
And whilst Anjali's craving for jalebis and pakora's am craving for Chapter 2 -QUICK!!!😳

Love You sweetie
Cheers


~Cher
xx



You are, aren't? Mind reader I mean! Everything I thought of while writing this, EVERY detail dammit!!
You've mentioned it. Who are you?

It's scary.😲

It's amazing how you've been 'stalking me!' guess, I have to get better noww...wait until you'll have to change your FF's name to "Is SHE stalking me?" Sorry bad joke, but it's late here and I am all choked up with emotion to be able to form a coherent thought.


*choking back all the love I have for you right now*
Ahh, now.

Yeah, I think I just let my imagination run wild...I wanted to break stereotypes...hoped I dont disappoint😉

I dont like jalebies...theyre sugary syrup-- its my revenge to them. Hehe😆 hope I havent ruined it's taste for you?

Khushi WILL be a sort of a puzzle, oh I love the way you've put it; but yess, he's going to have to breakthrough her wall of insecurities, better get armed huh? 😆

Hehe. I'd picture this headstrong cousinn of mine while describing Sia...and yess, she's going to play a major part in bringing them closer...there i go again!! Is this a way to get me to reveal the whole plot? Cuz I'm elated right now, I probably will.


Oh, forgive the late PM, I was making changes to the character sketch.

We can't all be as quick as lightning can we?

Thankyou so much for your honorary comments...just to let you know I read your comment like 5 times, sitting there gaping like a fish. It touched my heart, really. You'd the biggest reason i would even update!

P.S: my brother thinks I'm crazy because I sit in front of the laptop and scream that I love you...so yeah you're pretty much known in my house as someone who shares my insanity...so Pagli? Definitely maybe😆

Again, any 26 letter formation cannot describe how I feel right now, its just...thank you thank you thank you for making me feel this way. You've made my week think😉


Love you more,🤗

Disha


Edited by Madafterarhi - 12 years ago
723461 thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#20

Originally posted by: ASRandKKGSRFan

Hey!

I can't believe Anjali was talking to Arnav about an orgasm 🤣
Of all the people she could've said such a thing to, it had to be her brother, Arnav 😆
Ah yesss ... the moment Khushi held her neice closer to her before knowing who Arnav was, I really felt my heart going to her. Bless. 😊 Sia was a little fireball! Maybe just like Arnav when he's angry, but then again we've not seen any anger from him as of yet ... who knows ...
Thanks for the PM.



Hehe, Anjali is going to be really quirky and hilarious here...poor Arnav's had it😆

And dont you worry, you'll soon get to see some ASR in action when he's angry😃

Thank you for the comment, Hon😊

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