Widow remarriage.... a sign of dependency or a right???????????? - Page 2

Originally posted by: LTLFan

Ppl complain of remarriage bec some wanted zain and shrenu pair possibility. Aur koi deep reason nahi hai. LOL

I dont think circumstances of marriage is revealed fully yet. Weren't they shooting for flashback scenes with vyom? Are they aired yet? I have watched some scenes only of the show. So if not shown how ppl assume vyom forced her and all that. In todays episode kavya made it clear she is ok with the marriage.

Hahah I do not think at all ...because fans knew since day one that Shrenu is not opp Zain.. Shrenu said same very clearly on her LIVE CHAT

Aditi and Jigyasa were chosen opp Zain but they did not agree for this role so Tanvi stepped in ...

Here people are giving view on Writers Logic on Kavya and Kabir ( its not about Zain and Shrenu , kavya -kabir plot looks weak ) ..not Zain and Tanvi

People are missing the point here. The main point here is logically a dying person cannot process so much that opinion is necessary or not. He said what he felt best for his wife and child. Yes, he could have said take care of them instead of marrying Kavya, but we have to realise he was a dying man, he was not in a position to think. Kavya could have rejected her proposal but she didn't, that is not only to respect her dead husband but also thinking about her son's future. Now I am tired😓 I am leaving this topic here.

Originally posted by: smol-bean

I agree with a lot of things in this the post but 'widow remarriage' is not the problem but Vyom literally shoved his decision on Kavya , this isn't a choice. And it would have been exactly same for a man who decides to remarry for himself/or his child but the decision should be his alone. It shouldnt be shoved upon anyone.

If it would have been shown that after Vyom's death , Kavya and Kabeer fell in love and they got remarried out of love , it would have been a choice. Or maybe Kavya himself decided to get married to Kabir because Arush wanted it , that too is acceptable. But both isn't the case.

Vyom decided that his wife should marry Kabir but why ? Its not his decision to make. Why should even Kabir marry Kavya ?

He left both of them with no choice to find love rather pushed them towards sacrifice.

I find this plot very weak , just bad writing. It could have been executed so much better. The show is portraying such an important issue but the execution is terrible.

Like one person said here that vyom didn't see death coming to him from before hand such as an ill person with a deadly illness. He was shot, felt his life slipping out of his hands and for a dying person, especially a man with a wife and children he would worry what would happen to them after him, so as he was breathing his last he only worried about his family, which would be the same for anyone. He was neither being selfish or forceful and neither was that his intent. Even though india is progressing we can't pretend these things don't still happen in india. India is still a country with a very religious and traditional population.

Originally posted by: Sparklingstar22

People are missing the point here. The main point here is logically a dying person cannot process so much that opinion is necessary or not. He said what he felt best for his wife and child. Yes, he could have said take care of them instead of marrying Kavya, but we have to realise he was a dying man, he was not in a position to think. Kavya could have rejected her proposal but she didn't, that is not only to respect her dead husband but also thinking about her son's future. Now I am tired😓 I am leaving this topic here.

Let's not forget, that he dodged a bullet by marrying kavya... hehehehe. His backwards family and the two sisters would be prepared to pounce on him for marriage the moment he returned.

Originally posted by: SStephy

It depends on the context of the remarriage. If a widow is going to remarry because she wants to in order to start a new life then that's great. But if she is remarrying out of some compulsion from someone then that remarriage is not going to be empowering for her.

In Kavya's case, she didn't choose Kabir as a second life partner. She clearly did this marriage out of some compulsion from Vyom's last wish. Vyom didn't even consider Kavya's wishes, her need for time to get over his death, her choice to maybe remain single or even her choice to find a second love later on in life. He just assumed that Kavya won't be able to function after his death and immediately thrust her on to his friend. There is nothing commendable about such widow remarriages... these just feed into the stereotype that a woman has no life without a husband.

It would have been better if they had shown Kabir and Kavya falling in love and then marrying. Maybe the story would have made sense if Kabir happened to meet and fall in love with Kavya, a random widow with a son and she too started to love him and they married. But this whole marrying just to honour a friend/husband's last wish thing isn't right.

Originally posted by: SRKisLove

I guess we are forgetting that we are urban audiences and most of us don't have an idea of what ppl in BHARAT go through. we are happy in our INDIA.

Lets first remember that INDIA and BHARAT are two different entities.

Even today many people marry off the widows to a younger brother or something, to keep the widows within the family, and more importantly the child within the family.

We know that Vyom and Kavya's families were against their marriage. That itself shows that Vyom or Kavya's families would not accept Kavya and Aarush back, esp. not Kavya's family because she married against their wish.

Vyom knows that Kavya and Aarush are all alone. If it was only Kavya maybe he would have not taken that promise from Kabir, but his son is also involved here.

Vyom at the time of death, did not think much. Maybe his method was wrong, maybe he should have asked Kabir to look after his wife and son, instead of marriage. But lets be real. If Kabir would have got married later, say to Ishani, then he would have had his own family, and his wife, wouldn't have liked Kabir taking care of Kavya and Aarush.

To Vyom it looked like the best possible option, to secure his wife and son's future. Maybe it was selfish to not think of Kabir's and Kavya's wishes. But no one is in their right mind when they are about to die.

As for Kavya, she accepted it to honor Vyom's last wish. There is nothing more to that.

Our society still finds ways to ostracize widows.

This is one issue I have had with people on IF since my first show here (DBO). People are very quick to judge characters and call them regressive. Breathe for once, and take in a character's background.

People expect girls from the village who don't get an opportunity to study to become astro-physicists, thats difficult (happened in my previous show).

Let us think from the character's perspective, instead of forcing our ideas on characters.

Peace🤗

You're right we are Urban audience n things like marrying off girls without their consent are very common in rural areas n sometimes in urban society too.. But Kavya is a well educated woman too.. She is confident who can walk out of the house with her kid.. They didn't show if she was completely dependent on Vyom.. Both Vyom n Kabir were in army which means she had single handedly managed everything in their absence... So I refuse to agree that she is a dependent woman...

Yes Vyom didn't have the time to think it through that his decision was wrong... There was a similar situation in the show Sadda Haq where the ML's best friend had eloped with his GF.. The guy died in the hospital in an accident but his last wish for Randhir (ML) was to take care of his GF n their unborn child which he did.. He send her away n even helped her fulfill her dreams n become independent..

There lies my issue asking someone to marry your wife coz you're dying is not a good decision.. What if Kabir was committed to Ishani or he actually had the intention to marry her.. Three lives would have ruined in that case...

But since this marriage is the plot twist so I'm okay with it.. Like I said everything is okay in ITV.. But in reality I'm not supporting it..

PS. I know what happened in DBO 😑 but I've become Shrenu's admirer since that car-bulldozer scene 😍😍

Excellent post by you, Sammy! 👏

I agree with you completely. Want to write more but using IF from mobile and it's a task right now. Will get back to the post if I have time, later.

haven't read all posts here nor I'm watching this show but still having an idea of what this post is about, a husband asking for his wife's marriage with his friend just coz he is dying is itself very regressive, that's completely belittling his wife's ability to survive as a single mother and taking away the right to decide from her...and his friend too has emotions he might have always saw her as his bhabhi or a sister so it also undermines the sanctity of the bond his friend n his wife had shared...still if he had said it out of the blue Kabir n kavya should have thought rationally, Kabir could have provided her the support like financially, morally etc n kavya also should have simply cleared how she is not willing to marry him only coz her dying husband had said it...then in future if both fall in love thats where widow remarriage, widow's right to move on etc comes into picture not now, atm the scenario is very much like they are in some 18th or 19th century 😛

Originally posted by: smol-bean

I agree with a lot of things in this the post but 'widow remarriage' is not the problem but Vyom literally shoved his decision on Kavya , this isn't a choice. And it would have been exactly same for a man who decides to remarry for himself/or his child but the decision should be his alone. It shouldnt be shoved upon anyone.

If it would have been shown that after Vyom's death , Kavya and Kabeer fell in love and they got remarried out of love , it would have been a choice. Or maybe Kavya himself decided to get married to Kabir because Arush wanted it , that too is acceptable. But both isn't the case.

Vyom decided that his wife should marry Kabir but why ? Its not his decision to make. Why should even Kabir marry Kavya ?

He left both of them with no choice to find love rather pushed them towards sacrifice.

I find this plot very weak , just bad writing. It could have been executed so much better. The show is portraying such an important issue but the execution is terrible.