Originally posted by: sammy17
I had to make this post as this has become a strong issue on this forum where I have seen many members saying that kavya shouldn't have remarried to her husband's best friend and should have stayed single to prove she can be strong and independent and that this is a weak and illogical plot. Here is why I find this thinking so wrong. Please do think about the following points.
Why is marriage for kavya a bad solution? First of all Kavya married her late husband's best friend to honour his dying wish. So she was honouring his wish, which was one of the reasons.
My second and important point is remarrying doesn't make her a weak person if she decides she wants to remarry for her child's security or for herself. Plenty of men remarry in order to move on in life or to give their child a mother, so why would a woman be weak if she remarried in order to get support for herself and her child or simply because she wants to move on?
We never call men in the same situation weak if it is a man who is widowed with a child and decides he wants to remarry for the sake of his child or move on, which happens all the time. Does a woman have to remain alone and her child to remain fatherless just for the sake of proving she is strong etc? In a practical and progressing world where widows are now allowed to move on in life, why should a female character in shows be expected to remain single and not want to give her child a father figure just for the sake of showing an independent woman as people on this forum are suggesting. Doesn't that just propagate the idea that widows can't remarry and should stay single? Doesn't that take away a widow's right to choose to restart her life by judging her for remarrying. When widows now have the right to remarry unlike before, why can't they exercise that right if they want to instead of being judged as a weak and dependent person? Like I said, I don't see the same judgement for men in this situation.
That makes for my third point. Shouldn't a woman's wishes and choices be respected and she be given the right to make choices for herself without being judged whether that be having the right to remarry after her husband's death or to stay single and not be forced to remarry if she doesn't want to? Kavya made the choice that she wants to remarry both for her husband's dying wish and for her son, so she gets that right, the problem is that indian society still seems to stop widowed women from moving on and expect them to live in the past, which is wrong as this snatches the freedom to make a choice for themselves and instead forcing women to conform to society's views on how a woman should live.
People are saying kavya marrying her dead husband's friend is illogical, a weak plot and that she should have stayed single to make her strong and independent. I simply don't understand the need for this. It isn't a weak plot at all. A weak plot would be something incredibly unrealistic that doesn't make sense, which this isn't as many widowed women and men with or without children remarry in real life in order to move on. I'm sorry but I simply don't get why people are having issue to the idea of a widowed woman with a young child marrying again and instead suggesting that she should have stayed single and independent and that it would be more logical if she didn't remarry. I don't see how that's more logical when widow remarriage happens a lot now (thankfully). Logic isn't expecting a widowed woman to stay single and raise her child on her own if she wants to remarry, especially when she has been given a choice.
The point I am trying to make through this rather lengthy post is that by suggesting that a widowed woman like kavya with a now fatherless child should stay single and be independent is the same as taking a widowed woman's choice away of being able to have a second chance at marriage and the same as society expecting widows to stay unwed once they lose their husband. Dependency and in-dependency doesn't even come into question here... it is rights and freedom to make a choice.
Kabir was a single guy.... what was wrong with him marrying his best friend's wife and taking responsibility of their son too? Even in western countries there are plenty of single women both unwed mothers and widowed who go on to have relationships or remarry a man, so why is a widowed indian woman like kavya remarrying called a weak character, regressive and an illogical plot?
Kabhi Neem Neem Kabhi Shahad Shahad
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