Originally posted by: atominis
Kajol had once spoken of growing up in a broken home and how she saw her mom manage alone after divorce. I think she stays for sake of kids and does not want kids to grow without a father or seeing mom and dad separate. She dotes on her kids a lot.
Neetu was not an educated woman. She was a school dropout, child artiste. She was not even a big star. She had no self esteem. She was only too glad to be DIL of such a huge family and marry a highly educated and elite man like Rishi. She has upgraded her status in life by marrying a Kapoor. Women of her generation were also raised to tolerate anything and stay married at any cost and told to make marriage work or stay for sake of kids or in laws or told that their acceptance of their man as he is, will make him realise their value someday or so what if he has affairs or drinks or abuses, it is male nature or atleast he comes back to you eventually and legally you are still his wife and mother of his kids or you gotta stay for sake of kids and not deprive them of a dad.
People like Jaya and Neetu were old school. Jaya was reportedly very close to in laws and Bachchan seniors were fond of her and thought she was lucky for Amitabh. It was in laws and kids who made her stay and it was in laws who forbade Amitabh from leaving Jaya for Rekha or else he was ready to divorce Jaya and marry Rekha at one point.
Sridevi was also someone who never went to school and was controlled by her mom all life. She had no self esteem. She was later controlled by Boney. Women like her, who do not even control own finances or whose mom decides which film she will sign or not, will obviously tolerate anything and not take a stand or keep self busy with kids and let men do anything.
Usually divorce is a huge stigma in India even now. And most Indian women have low self esteem, are raised to be dependent or keep family together at any cost or stay for sake of kids or make it work. Or told how woman's ultimate aim in life is to get married, have kids, please husband and in laws and win them over or how unmarried or divorced daughter is burden for parental family or will be lonely etc. The pressure is too much.
Likes of Samantha, Kiran, Reena Dutta, Adhuna Akhtar, Dimple, Tanuja, Suzanne Khan etc have been trolled and bashed till date by so called fans and media for separating from husbands or blamed for ruining life of men or labeled selfish or lonely or whatnot. I remember Rajinikanth's daughters also trolled like no tomorrow when they separated from husbands.
The pressure is too much. Very few have thick skin to be able to ignore it. Or withstand it and lead life on their own.
Divorced woman is seen as vamp, available, faulty, loose character or whatnot. Indians also bash single moms and kids of divorced parents a LOT.
Media also hounds star kids about divorce of parents. Like Sara, Shahid, Shruti and Akshara Haasan etc still get asked about divorce of parents.
Or Amrita was always hounded on her divorce or marrying a younger man or how she handles as single mom or blamed when Sara was summoned by NCB.
It is not easy to handle such pressure or scrutiny or backlash.
Some are also threatened by spouse or in laws to keep quiet or paid hush money to stay and put up happy face in front of world for sake of family image.
Fear of media and public backlash or losing image or fans are huge factor in projecting happy family image.
Aamir and Kamal Haasan for eg have lost lot of base among conservative Indians after 2 divorces and are seen as selfish or failures or someone who failed to control women or stay loyal to one and even their ex wives are bashed by trolls. Dimple is still abused and blamed by fans of Kaka for his downfall, while Jaya and Neetu are hailed as some mahaan pativrata naari for sticking by their man no matter what.
Some women are plain dependent, mentally, socially, physically, financially. Some are kept married due to superstitions or luck or social image.
Some stay purely for sake of wealth, prestige and power that marriage to some big khandaan guy brings with it.
Most stay for sake of kids or in laws or own older parents.
Also some, who married for security or safety, will stay no matter what, as they find threat outside home bigger than mess inside home.
It is still a deeply patriarchal country and society.
Yogita was an actress once but tolerated all affairs of Mithun. She threatened to commit suicide when she saw Mithun too serious about Sridevi and ready to leave her for Sridevi. She was too dependent and also gave up own work for kids and did not want to lose Mithun.
Actresses leaving or cutting down on work after marriage and kids also keeps them more dependent on spouse and they tolerate any shit for sake of kids and see no other mode of survival.
Some divorced ones like Karishma are finding it hard to get work or earn at this stage and her comeback attempts are failing. It is not that easy for them. Only ads and endorsements for atta or noodles will not pay for lavish lifestyle she and her kids are used to. But she has Kapoor tag so she has less issues. Ones like Shilpa for eg, have tolerated anything for sake of probably big money of husband.
Shiv Shakti
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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