Elli vs Naag Man! So who was wrong? - Page 10

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tanvismile thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#91

Originally posted by: ramjaane

This article clearly mentioned the sequence in a 34 slides by leaving a question mark at the end :

Bigg Boss 7: Was Armaan Kohli sexually harassing Elli Avaram as other contestants laughed?


Armaan flaunts in front of the other contestants that when Elli threatened to slap him, he said "Abhi Dekho aisa hai ki, jo thappad mereko maarte hai, mai ya toh pappi le leta hu, ya kapde phaad deta hu"
Then he goes on to ask, "Isme Bura Kya Hai Batao?" He was greeted with laughter from the other inmates except form Sangram who later requested Bigg Boss to give him some power so that he can fight such stuff.


Sexual harassment of women has become a prime concern for the nation, and despite people voicing their concern over the seriousness of the matter, we have clearly failed to register the gravity of the issue.

The question is have we learnt nothing?

Besharam 😡
-GayabCat- thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#92
Good post cruiser
I feel arman was wrong
I also feel that elli weakness in hindi is playong against her!
Sharif.Badmaash thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#93

Originally posted by: -Purva-



I'm not even talking of Pratyusha's behavior here. And how should the behavior of a twenty something bimbo be a guide to a 50+ man in how he should behave with women?

I'll give you one example - If you remember the season when Sameer Soni and Dolly Bindra had their famous altercation. The two were extremely angry, close o violence, screaming their lungs out at each other and almost standing nose-to-nose - yet Sameer did not say one obscene thing to Dolly. he di not cross the line of decency. Wouldn't you say that Sameer had enough provocation to cross the line?

The point we are all trying to make is that Arman has that cheap mentality that is reflected in his behavior and attitude everyday. He has crossed a line that he should not have. And the line that he would strip Elli - BB did not show that line when it was actually said, Arman went and told the rest of the housemates that this was the way he reacted to Elli's objection to which the silly girl was crying. He did not realize or accept that he had made a mistake even then. And he went to apologize not because he felt bad about his behavior but because Elli was still upset about it.



Its not about the age factor , i just feel being a girl Pratyusha should've understood Elli's discomfort like Gauhar did later & stop this argument.

Samir Soni was a GEM on BB & he is way ahead of Armaan in terms of Moral & ethics. moreover , i never said Armaan was not at fault in all this scenario , its just we're going a little overboard with all this.

Bazigar thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#94
1. Gender issue :

Sometime we tag few female members who raise these issues, so also blaming few that they are going OTT . When there is a crime happen , we never share opinion on the basis of gender then it is wrong notion that we should support a crime/wrong just because some male did it,by the way a Armaan , or a molester or a harraser dont relate with us in a slightest possible way than why should we defend them just bcoz they are male? It is just a wrong act by Armaan.

2. OTT :

Is this issue OTT , i dont think so . These type of things should be discussed and these type of crap behavior should be slammed , denounced . If BB at least reprimand him on that crap behavior of Armaan then that should be better for the viewer who watch this show and put across a message. Society is not something different , we make it , we are a part of society. Certainly these discussion shape up our thoughts and it is nothing wrong to diagonise a disease like behavior of Armaan It is just a discussion just like we have in the forum albeit a little productive one. .
Edited by ramjaane - 12 years ago
826374 thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#95

Originally posted by: -Purva-

I'll tell you why it's a big deal. It's because every time something like this takes place we trivialize it - even in real life. So many times when friends, relatives, strangers, colleagues have crossed the line of decency girls tend to ignore it and then pay for that one mistake with a lifetime of regrets. Stop the crime before it is committed not punish the guilty after the crime. t the point when somebody crosses the line, the very first time, then is the moment to create a hue and cry about it.

I'm not even talking of Pratyusha's behavior here. And how should the behavior of a twenty something bimbo be a guide to a 50+ man in how he should behave with women?

I'll give you one example - If you remember the season when Sameer Soni and Dolly Bindra had their famous altercation. The two were extremely angry, close o violence, screaming their lungs out at each other and almost standing nose-to-nose - yet Sameer did not say one obscene thing to Dolly. he di not cross the line of decency. Wouldn't you say that Sameer had enough provocation to cross the line?

The point we are all trying to make is that Arman has that cheap mentality that is reflected in his behavior and attitude everyday. He has crossed a line that he should not have. And the line that he would strip Elli - BB did not show that line when it was actually said, Arman went and told the rest of the housemates that this was the way he reacted to Elli's objection to which the silly girl was crying. He did not realize or accept that he had made a mistake even then. And he went to apologize not because he felt bad about his behavior but because Elli was still upset about it.

I thought very hard about the issue and if I'm over-reacting - and honestly the answer is No. And frankly I call out my father too if he ever makes a sexist comment - and the poor man is the most upright and ethical person I've come across in life.


purva , i m totally agree with u , but i have 1 question, this is a show , may be that's y people not taking it that seriously , but tell me one thing when show makers show " manhandling " on daily shows n try to show it like passionate love story , then kyu nahi same objection hota...vo bhi toh wrong hai , vo bhi wrong msg de rahe hain , daily shows r trying to show that this is ok in love if a guy shouts at u , draggs u , pulls u , pushes u ,misbehaves u , disrespects u , in short " manhandling " is ok ...uspai kyu log axcuses detey hai ki he is doing bcs guy is hurt

kya vo sexciasm nahi hai , ladki ne kisike saath dance kar liya ladke ka ego hurrt ho gya , khud bhale hi naach chuka ho other girls ke saath , but jese hi ladkay ki baat aati hai logo ke excuse start ho jaate hai

1 " he was hurt "

2 " if she did not raised her voice then vo asa nahi karta , girl was stubborn "

aur ye dono excuse girls hi deti hai ...y ? bcs hero is hot 🤪
Siya_ thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#96
(Trigger Warning: Rape Culture discussed in this post)
People keep saying it's 'just' a semi-reality show and 'just' a joke, and what's the big deal even after excellent arguments put forward by so many members.

Here is why it's such a big deal (I'm just copy pasting from a blog post, since there's no point in paraphrasing - it's in the context of rape jokes, which btw, was what Armaan's comment about 'kissing her or tearing her clothes' was - trivializing sexual violence):

"A lot of people accuse feminists of thinking that all men are rapists. That's not true. But do you know who think all men are rapists?


Rapists do.


They really do. In psychological study, the profiling, the studies, it comes out again and again.


Virtually all rapists genuinely believe that all men rape, and other men just keep it hushed up better. And more, these people who really are rapists are constantly reaffirmed in their belief about the rest of mankind being rapists like them by things like rape jokes, that dismiss and normalize the idea of rape."


Now before you start in on me for bringing in rape when it was 'just' a case of eve teasing: eve teasing, lewd stares, molestation, rape - are all branches of the same tree. Read the full post before you start protesting that the branches have nothing to do with each other.


Men who commit any kind of sexual crime against women, from staring to the other extreme, are not psychopaths, as popular opinion has it. Most of them are merely regular-brained human beings who have been been mis-socialized into believing this is the norm of society, and that it is their right.


Whether BB is scripted or not is irrelevant. This is about the message it sends to the public, and the men of the kind discussed above, who're part of the public.


A woman who feels sexually harassed and is upset is told by another woman to dismiss it and get over it because it was all a 'joke', and then told she was wrong for saying she'd slap the harasser. Then she's yelled at and called stupid by the harasser, after which a woman says he could have done this before in response to her retaliation, but he chose not to. People laugh along with the harasser behind her back, at his joke about sexual violence, and trivialize her discomfort. When the harasser finally apologizes, it's with the air of getting 'the whole thing over with'.


I'm sorry, but if after watching this, even one man out there is reinforced in his belief that he can do - or forget do, even say - whatever he wants and that he will be similarly supported by both men and women; that a woman saying 'no' or 'thappad marungi' softly, or as he perceives it, jokingly, means nothing; that he can yell at someone making an issue of feeling sexually abused after the fact and call her stupid; that he does not need to apologize right away, and only if it becomes too much of a 'drama' should he go and be 'magnanimously' sorry; then it's wrong.


And it's especially wrong if someone out there believes that stripping a woman or kissing her after she slaps him is the norm and happens behind closed doors all the time, and believes that these people were laughing because they agree and feels validated.


We can't control everything that reinforces the beliefs of such people, but we can certainly make an issue out of some of it whenever we come across it. We shouldn't have to deal with the ridiculous argument that because there is a sea of similar or worse examples, why do we pick on this drop?

Edited by Siya_ - 12 years ago
-Purva- thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#97

Originally posted by: ANNMT.


purva , i m totally agree with u , but i have 1 question, this is a show , may be that's y people not taking it that seriously , but tell me one thing when show makers show " manhandling " on daily shows n try to show it like passionate love story , then kyu nahi same objection hota...vo bhi toh wrong hai , vo bhi wrong msg de rahe hain , daily shows r trying to show that this is ok in love if a guy shouts at u , draggs u , pulls u , pushes u ,misbehaves u , disrespects u , in short " manhandling " is ok ...uspai kyu log axcuses detey hai ki he is doing bcs guy is hurt

kya vo sexciasm nahi hai , ladki ne kisike saath dance kar liya ladke ka ego hurrt ho gya , khud bhale hi naach chuka ho other girls ke saath , but jese hi ladkay ki baat aati hai logo ke excuse start ho jaate hai

1 " he was hurt "

2 " if she did not raised her voice then vo asa nahi karta , girl was stubborn "

aur ye dono excuse girls hi deti hai ...y ? bcs hero is hot 🤪



Yes it is sexism and yes it needs to denounced loudly, clearly and repetitively till better sense prevails. Not for nothing is TV called the Idiot Box. Over the years Saas-Bahu serials have been the worst culprits in promoting and legalizing a culture of domestic violence and misogyny and almost all serials depict statutory rape in the name of marriages - when a marriage is solemnized under threat, through bribe, under false pretexts, by means of monetary or other inducement, with a minor - then they all come under the head of Statutory Rape.


I would gladly go and tell those silly schoolgirls that THIS is not romance. Only thing is that the Mods and IF that survive on the traffic generated by hormonal rush of teenage girly fans would shut down and long before that I would be permanently banned from IF for daring to "upset fangroups". Give me an opportunity and immunity from Mods and see if I don't explain a few facts of life to the teeny-boppers.

826374 thumbnail
Posted: 12 years ago
#98

Originally posted by: -Purva-



Yes it is sexism and yes it needs to denounced loudly, clearly and repetitively till better sense prevails. Not for nothing is TV called the Idiot Box. Over the years Saas-Bahu serials have been the worst culprits in promoting and legalizing a culture of domestic violence and misogyny and almost all serials depict statutory rape in the name of marriages - when a marriage is solemnized under threat, through bribe, under false pretexts, by means of monetary or other inducement, with a minor - then they all come under the head of Statutory Rape.


I would gladly go and tell those silly schoolgirls that THIS is not romance. Only thing is that the Mods and IF that survive on the traffic generated by hormonal rush of teenage girly fans would shut down and long before that I would be permanently banned from IF for daring to "upset fangroups". Give me an opportunity and immunity from Mods and see if I don't explain a few facts of life to the teeny-boppers.


thank u , u r very honest , straight forward ...muje ye hi ans chahiye tha 😊
-Purva- thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago
#99
@Siya

+1 to you and couldn't agree more with your post.

Siya_ thumbnail
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Posted: 12 years ago

Originally posted by: -Purva-

@Siya

+1 to you and couldn't agree more with your post.


Thank you. 😊

Same for me with all your posts in this thread, and especially about statutory rape in Indian tv shows. Between that and the abusive, glorified 'bad boys', I don't know if we'll ever have a show worth watching 🤢

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