Astitva - cultural differnces - Page 2

Very nice points by all!! But, according to me, there is one truth which i sternly believe. The Indians who are living abroad, follow more Indian values and custom than the Indians who live in India. The westernisation is so prevalent in India that only people living here will understand what i really mean to say.

I have seen all my hubby's cousins, their friends, who live in US. All the ladies there follow a strict agenda like going to the temple, wear sarees on important occassion, have get together during Indian festivals, do a grand scale puja . During Navrathri, they even keep dolls and do the puja.

But here, i just do not see the traditions being followed by the girls and boys of our next generation. I know many girls who are tomboyinsh, talking to the boys putting thier arms over them. They call that boy as a mere friend. They do not have even the decency to think whether they are doing right or wrong. This is why i told in my previous post that the younger generation in India seems to be taking undue advantage of the freedom given to them. They are trying to follow western culture, but they themselves do not know that the Indians abroad are far better than them in maintaining their values and custom....

Originally posted by: trupti286

Some of the things that happen in astitva seem too ridiculous to viewers in India but not to those who live abroad and vice versa.

eg. Sia and sid's closeness may seem perfectly natural and not objectionable to many and taking autograph on cast may not seem that ridiculous to many. I think the bottomline is the things that you see in real life are accepted as "normal" by many of us.

I have seen a lot of western influence on Indian younger generation in recent years. Everytime we visit India we look very orthodox and outdated compared to the city crowds. Do you think these serials reflect reality of life in India or are there double standards?

Any views about indians living abroad and trying to maintain Indian culture vs. indians living in India trying to develop western culture?

Very nice topic to debate on Trupti

Yes, I agree, everytime when we visit India we look more orthodox than the people there. I have had my own experiences on this and must say lifestyle has really changed in India.

Yes, people abroad try to be more Indianised and try to imbibe Indian values to our kids, where as in India - more and more western culture is crawling

I dont think taking signature on cast is that bad😊 I had a very close friend with a cast and her fiance used to almost sign everyday....moreoever we shd remember that both sid & sia were raised abroad.😉 I feel more or less these serials depict the social life in India (sometimes they go to extremes though)

As sree mentioned, I too find it difficult to digest when I see kids who grew just in front of me..walking around with jeans & spagheti tops, their behaviour infront of boys etc., etc., and they think everybody in America wears those kind of dress everyday!!! At the same time, I have to say all these teenagers are really sweet and are making very good progress in their education.

Television has a very high impact on social life of India. It has the power of both destruction & construction on youngster's minds.

Originally posted by: sree_20

Very nice points by all!! But, according to me, there is one truth which i sternly believe. The Indians who are living abroad, follow more Indian values and custom than the Indians who live in India. The westernisation is so prevalent in India that only people living here will understand what i really mean to say.

I have seen all my hubby's cousins, their friends, who live in US. All the ladies there follow a strict agenda like going to the temple, wear sarees on important occassion, have get together during Indian festivals, do a grand scale puja . During Navrathri, they even keep dolls and do the puja.

But here, i just do not see the traditions being followed by the girls and boys of our next generation. I know many girls who are tomboyinsh, talking to the boys putting thier arms over them. They call that boy as a mere friend. They do not have even the decency to think whether they are doing right or wrong. This is why i told in my previous post that the younger generation in India seems to be taking undue advantage of the freedom given to them. They are trying to follow western culture, but they themselves do not know that the Indians abroad are far better than them in maintaining their values and custom....

Sree i beg to differ with you . By Indians in the U.S going to the temple and singing Bhajans don't become more Indian than the Kids back home who don't go to the temple as often. Kids abroad just try harder to hold on to the Indian culture because its simply not surrounding them .

Its like when i used to live with my parents , they had certain family customs i took for granted and made little effort to follow ......but the moment i left their home i was desperate to follow all those customs just to honor them . I think the same goes for Indians who move to the U.S . But just there being able to remember whats their custom and being able to follow it shows that it was deep in their heart ....embedded in their.

Thats the thing with Indian kids .............its deep in their heart . Their putting an arm around a boy they call their buddy doesn't mean they are taking advantage of the freedom their family is giving to them .Thank god ....but male/ female interaction these days especcialy in big cities is not a big deal these days . Its good that their is comfort level between the two sexes now . Thats how it ought to be .😊

Originally posted by: dotraj

moreoever we shd remember that both sid & sia were raised abroad.😉 power of both destruction & construction on youngster's minds.

Hey buddy, thanks for this reminder...coz i plum forgot that - what with neither of them behaving as if they have ever stepped out of their own houses (or hospital)!! 😆 What you said makes perfect sense...👏

i just wrote such a detailed reply to sree and xyzzee's posts and the server lost it 😭 😭 😭 O well, maybe its better if i just shut up...

Sorry Indygirl, but as i said, my thoughts might be a bit old paced. But yes, what i meant to say was i feel this difference a lot. Indians living abroad tend to keep in their mind that they are not in their home place. This is a place where they need to live in, but they always need to adopt their own culture, be Indians in all aspects of life. They cultivate all the customs and traditions which a normal indian will tend to follow.

Yes, i do believe that going to temples, following certain rituals or doing ccertain prayers, as per your religion is what Indians are known for. The people who live abroad are taught all this. Though they wear all kind of dresses that nned to be worn there, they also follow their Indian values. They care for them, respect them.

But for us, Indians living in India, we think we are just a developing country, where people need to grow more towards cultivating the western style of living. For all those who do not believe that girls here in India, do not live upto great exoectations, Friends this you need to be here to believe.

Whenever i go out with my hubby to any public place, i see such girls roaming around with a gorup of boys as though their entire worl revolves around them. Yes, Indygirl, in India, however developed we may be, if a boy and a girl are seen hugging each other, with the girls wearing all sorts of western outfits, it is not a good sight to watch on. Yes, we can be wearing all sorts of dresses, but as someone before me said, there needs to be a decency in what they wear. They need to behave better in public place. But these are never seen in some places in India. Day in and day out, i have seen such happenings before me, which make me really feel, how come these girls are like this?

Yes, i am damn sure that the kids of the younger generation do take undue advantage of the freedom they have been given. These are my viewpoints though. I have been seeing this happen , i have seen it with my own eyes, so i will tend to believe what i have seen and experienced. Sorry, i do not mean to hurt or impose my thoughts on others...

Originally posted by: indygirl

Sree i beg to differ with you . By Indians in the U.S going to the temple and singing Bhajans don't become more Indian than the Kids back home who don't go to the temple as often. Kids abroad just try harder to hold on to the Indian culture because its simply not surrounding them .

Its like when i used to live with my parents , they had certain family customs i took for granted and made little effort to follow ......but the moment i left their home i was desperate to follow all those customs just to honor them . I think the same goes for Indians who move to the U.S . But just there being able to remember whats their custom and being able to follow it shows that it was deep in their heart ....embedded in their.

Thats the thing with Indian kids .............its deep in their heart . Their putting an arm around a boy they call their buddy doesn't mean they are taking advantage of the freedom their family is giving to them .Thank god ....but male/ female interaction these days especcialy in big cities is not a big deal these days . Its good that their is comfort level between the two sexes now . Thats how it ought to be .😊

I completely agree with you Indygirl.. I have experienced the same thing as far as my nephews, niece in US are concerned. and so many others are concerned. They go to temples, do Poojas but in their heart of hearts and even the way they relate to others, their views on relationships, I do not think they are more Indian than my Indian cousins/nieces/nephews in India.. And I would not blame anyone on this - after all, the lifestyle is completely different here, the way they view relationships, etc..Exceptions are there but exceptions prove the rule. By and large (going by my experiences of my parents and uncle's and aunt's neighbours, my own friends and their cousins and their observations) in India, the middle class still has their family values intact. And yes, the same younger generation in India may not go to temples every week but all celebrations of festivals are held in great gusto, look at the crowd in temples durng festivals in India..And you see most of them are from the middle class. I do not believe that just saying/learning the Vishnu Sahasranama, Gayatri Mantras or some shlokas make someone more Indian (though these are good things to learn)! If that is the yardstick for measurement of Indianness, I would have failed miserably as an "Indian" growing up (though I always believed in God and would pray the way I felt comfortable).. if you see the general demeanor and behaviour and the way the girls and guys carry themselves in programmes like Saa Re Ga Ma Paa (mostly from the middle class), we see a great sense of humility, respect and culture in them..Just an example of how you see alll kinds..

Just my observations and no offence to anyone.

Sree i understand your view point too . I too was born and lived in India for 28 years of my life and came to live in the U.S only 3 years back . I was from Delhi where kids are growing up to be comfortable with boys . I too grew up in that enviorment and must say i would've been one of those girls you saw hanging out with those boys . Even then those things were not completely acceptable and aren't so today . But in defense of those girls ( since i was one of them 10 years ago. 😆 ). I may have hung out with boys ,partyied a lot . But i never forgit till date the most important values my parents taught me . Whether its respect for elders , or being a decent human being !! I think its a lot of generation gap that makes us frown on these things . But actually there is nothing bad these kids are doing . Unless we are talking about kids taking drugs ,or doing something illegal . Thats nothing to do with being Indian or western just bubbling hormones.

Originally posted by: indygirl

Sree i understand your view point too . I too was born and lived in India for 28 years of my life and came to live in the U.S only 3 years back . I was from Delhi where kids are growing up to be comfortable with boys . I too grew up in that enviorment and must say i would've been one of those girls you saw hanging out with those boys . Even then those things were not completely acceptable and aren't so today . But in defense of those girls ( since i was one of them 10 years ago. 😆 ). I may have hung out with boys ,partyied a lot . But i never forgit till date the most important values my parents taught me . Whether its respect for elders , or being a decent human being !! I think its a lot of generation gap that makes us frown on these things . But actually there is nothing bad these kids are doing . Unless we are talking about kids taking drugs ,or doing something illegal . Thats nothing to do with being Indian or western just bubbling hormones.

Very well said, Indygirl 👏

I would prefer if there is some sort of westernization in our Indian Culture. We cannot still have old beliefs that have no bearing or no reasoning and say that these are Indian customs and we stand by them.
I wonder if coming late to almost all meetings is in the Indian culture? If accepting an individual without having prejudices is a western concept that Indians cannot accept?
I am sorry.. but going to temples, forcing kids to learn indian fine arts does not make one more Indian. Understanding the facts on how relations are maintained in family goes a long way in raising kids.
Like xyz said, if knowing the religious hyms means you are a true Indian, then I do not qualify to be one. I cannot relate all stories to my kid, because he is going to ask me why Draupadi had 5 husbands..
The beauty of it is when we can take the good from both cultures, but 'good' always comes with a little bit of 'bad' and it is our duty as parents to instill the ability to distinguis between the two.
Wearing Jeans, western outfits may not make the person uncultured. For all you know the person may be the most selfless person around and thats what counts. The people who stress on rituals will remain centered around the rituals and will not question if the ritual still makes sense. I would rather not be in that kind of a world.
I see that a lot has been said on this topic and am jumping in too late.. but could not let go without adding my 2 annas.