Astitva - cultural differnces - Page 7

Read all the posts so far and couldn't help but put in my thoughts too 😃 Well, I feel that it depends on who u r and what your background and how and where ur upbringing was, the people surrounding you controll ur thoughts about you define being modern, westernised, Indianised etc. Eg. wearing jeans may not be a big "ohh aahhh" in the middle class or uppermiddle class households in cities. But it certainly can be seen as being "modern" among middle class and even upper middle class people in suburbs and small towns. Middle and upper middle class is a economic status isn't it? So you can find them even in villages where wearing Jeans (ofcourse for girls) can be a taboo even today. I personally feel that wearing a certain kind of dress does not project whether a person is modern or traditional. I have seen too many people dressed in minis and sphagetti straps being extremely narrow minded. People might wear western clothes but still be very traditional. On the other hand I have seen people who go to temples every week, perform elaborate puja, recite shlokas and yet are so mean and selfish when it comes to relating to others. So I feel that being a good human being and being tolerant and true to others and oneself is more important than being Indian or western.

I wish more people living in India were also participating in this post so that we could hear both sides of the story! Most of us living abroad come in contact with a very limited number of people and most of us are there for a limited number of weeks. Therefore observations made by us have some limitations.

Akshata, I have lived in Singapore for many years and i have so many fond memories. It is like a second home to all of us but it is my experience that there are good and bad things everywhere. The ratio of good vs. bad is different. Again, the definition of good and bad are different in the first place. Recently there was an execution of an Australian citizen because he was caught with drugs. There was a big uproar against it. According to many around the world (and as I percieve to many participating in the discussion) it was not a big deal. But, I guess each country has a right to set its own standards to determine "right" and "wrong". Similarly, I suppose each family sets its own standards according to various factors, such as your own upbringing etc.

To give you a simple eg. HBO channel in singapore used to be different from HBO channel in USA. The movie ratings used to be different. I may sound orthodox but most PG-13 movies in USA don't seem fit to me for 13 year olds.

Freedom and responsibility go hand in hand. You earn freedom as you become more responsible. Freedom without the sense of responsibility is a sure way to downfall, irrespective of where you live and what culture are you from!!

Hi Trupti, Interesting topic you started.
Yeah,and more people living in India should have participated.....would have helped broaden our views.

I can see what you are saying about Singapore.From what I know,Singapore is the "safest" in the sub continent.The Government is very strict on many issues.If they can have prohibition on chewing gum in public,I can imagine the laws there.Untill some years ago even Star TV was banned or even now programmes are censored. (I may be wrong)
I have many friends who feel that Singapore is a safer place to bring up children.

I guess I was a little vague when I said many countries in South East Asia have the problems we talked about.
I am saying that the society in SEA,(especially Hong Kong and Thailand)has social problems like drugs,sex related diseases,teenage pregnancies just like the "western" society.
Infact,like you mentioned,drug peddling is a serious crime and has the death penalty in most of the countries here(SEA).And why not? You are absolutely right about each country having it's own set of rights and wrongs.

I tend to compare HGK and SING to USA because all three have an amalgamation of cultures.
HongKong is a safe place as far as day to day life is concerned.Singapore I know is great.

I think the main reason why so many Indians start to like their life abroad,although they miss their home country is that they can live their lives the way they want without violating the laws of the country they reside in.Many continue to eat,pray,and dress,even celebrate festivals like they used to back home and incorporate "new traditions" like Halloween, Thanksgiving,The Lunar New year(Chinese).

Have I just moved away from the topic??? Sorry!
The bottom line is that it's upto an individual to learn
good or "bad" things from another culture.And that is influenced by one's own culture and upbringing.
If we are smart enough to see what has helped a country progress and what has caused destruction,we can learn only the good things to improve atleast our own life,if not the whole society.

I feel the present generation is smart enough to bring about that positive change.

Cheers

I do not necessarily agree with all the methods used in singapore but as i said there is never 100% "right" or "wrong" anywhere. There has to be a balance about everything. If there are too many restrictions, there is a possibility of rebellion. It acts like a spring that is suppressed. It is bound to bounce back. But discipline developed due to understanding, limits set by one's self are long lasting and though they are difficult to instill at first, I think ultimately that is the permanent solution.

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Freedom and responsibility go hand in hand. You earn freedom as you become more responsible. Freedom without the sense of responsibility is a sure way to downfall, irrespective of where you live and what culture are you from!!

Very well said Trupti.....very well 👏

Originally posted by: trupti286

I do not necessarily agree with all the methods used in singapore but as i said there is never 100% "right" or "wrong" anywhere. There has to be a balance about everything. If there are too many restrictions, there is a possibility of rebellion. It acts like a spring that is suppressed. It is bound to bounce back. But discipline developed due to understanding, limits set by one's self are long lasting and though they are difficult to instill at first, I think ultimately that is the permanent solution.

Absolutely!!! I think we are saying the same thing in our own way.😊

Akshata

Originally posted by: sindoorfan

On the other hand I have seen people who go to temples every week, perform elaborate puja, recite shlokas and yet are so mean and selfish when it comes to relating to others. So I feel that being a good human being and being tolerant and true to others and oneself is more important than being Indian or western.

Hi Sindoorfan i agree with everyword u said , but especially loved these words of yours . I was trying to express the same .I have seen very conservative , very religous people in India ( i mean they can be anywhere.........but my maximum experiences have been in India) who are absolutely mean , shallow and selfish . and so many people who are hep , modern , so called forward and lovely human beings . Clothes and many things are superficial what matters is what kind of a person you are.

Originally posted by: indygirl

Hi Sindoorfan i agree with everyword u said , but especially loved these words of yours . I was trying to express the same .I have seen very conservative , very religous people in India ( i mean they can be anywhere.........but my maximum experiences have been in India) who are absolutely mean , shallow and selfish . and so many people who are hep , modern , so called forward and lovely human beings . Clothes and many things are superficial what matters is what kind of a person you are.

Thanks Indygirl 😊

You need to remember that India is a new country. The USA had these problems during the early 1900's. India is still developing. Eventually, the corruption will go down.

Also, the reason there is so much law and order in the west is because there are the police. Now that there are security cameras everywhere in the US, crime has gone down. People in the west would be just as rude to each other and steal if there was no law and order.

Originally posted by: indygirl

Another thing i like about the West is respect for an Individuals life and property . When i came to the U.S i was shocked to see that people hardly built walls as boundaries . It was understood - private property - keep out!!!!! . In India we would have happily extended over to our neighbours property and then spent years fighting with our neighbour over the possesion of their land .

About Individual life , i must say i have a strong aversion to the cops in India ( sorry don't want to hurt any one's feeling ...........but i have a strong reasons to say so )
1) Once i was harrased in a car accident case , when we took a accident victim to the hospital, the cops wouldn't let us go and demanded money when we were just being good citizens( they realised i was with my boyfriend ( now hubby)and did not want too much fuss made) !!!
2) Once i was attacked by a cranky old neighbour who hated me walking my dog in the park . I reported the case . Nothing was EVER done about the situation !!
3) One time , me and my boyfriend( now hubby) were sitting in the park .....a cop came and harrased us for money .
Now can such blatant corruption happen in the U.S ? So far i haven't seen it . Also can people get away by beating up other people , and the person lodges a complaint with the police in the U.S ?
Would like to hear your opinion !!!

Originally posted by: amitroy5

You need to remember that India is a new country. The USA had these problems during the early 1900's. India is still developing. Eventually, the corruption will go down.

Also, the reason there is so much law and order in the west is because there are the police. Now that there are security cameras everywhere in the US, crime has gone down. People in the west would be just as rude to each other and steal if there was no law and order.

Agreed.. I also agree that we have seen so called conservative, 'pious' people in India who are actually selfish, mean, etc. It is sad to see such kind of Indians in the US too!! One would think that exposure to the outside world would have imrpoved them some, broadended their outllok somewhat - which is not the case! So I think a lot of it just has to do with the uprbinging, etc..

I also agree that India has definitely seen vast improvements in the last 5-10 years in many aspects. There are many aspects of India I would not compare with the US - only because that would be comparing apples and oranges..Of course that does not mean we sit back contented, but major changes take time and India is heading in the right direction regarding many issues.