It's Complicated - IshRa OS

Author' note:

It's Complicated

"People tend to complicate their own lives, as if living weren't already complicated enough."
Carlos Ruiz Zafn, The Shadow of the Wind

"Ah, lips that say one thing, while the heart thinks another,"
" Alexandre Dumas (The Count of Monte Cristo)

"When was your last tetanus shot?" She asks him as they exit the court grounds.

"What?"

"I asked you about the last time you got a tetanus shot."

"Uh... don't worry I don't need one."

Assured that her car is not going over 60, she looks at her husband who is nursing his bleeding injured hand and shakes her head.

"I should have known." She mutters under her breath.

"Did you say something?" He asks her.

She merely shakes her head in a reply and turns her sight back on the road. Mere minutes ago she had declined his offer to drop her at the home and right now, she is driving him there herself! Sometimes she wonders if life will just give her a break.

Lost as she is in her thoughts she does not realize her husband' attention is completely on her. Cradling his injured hand gently by his other hand while it still throbs from the cut and the pain, all he can think of is his wife is being besides him and the silence lingering between them. He wishes this silence was comfortable and soft, filled with the sweetness he experienced with her before this whole fiasco.

They had sank into a routine, after dinner when she would come to their room to retire for the night she would pick up a book to read while he would turn on the TV to catch up with the latest in cricket and football. They would not speak, not unless needed but there was an unspoken affection that had crept between them that would make him put the TV on mute or switch it off completely once he would notice she is asleep.

The nights she would fall asleep reading he would quietly walk up to her, take away the book from her hand, put the comforter over her and switch off the lights so her sleep is not disturbed. The morning thereafter, they would resume their roles and bicker like an old married couple, either never commenting or asking a word about any of it.

In turn, she would quietly carry on her duties too. Without him asking for it, she would keep a fresh set of ironed clothes ready for him on the bed each morning, along with his wallet, kerchief and watch, make his tea just the way he likes it, and keep his mobile and laptop charged since he always forgot about those.

There would be no thanks for what one did for the other. It was a given, they came to rely on each other, their relationship having developed a mutuality that brought them comfort and a sense of belonging.

The nights they slept with Ruhi between them became the ones which he secretly delighted in, for after that initial night there was no hesitation between them whenever Ruhi next came up with the request to their room. He wouldn't give away his game by keeping a poker face but he would love to see Ishita put Ruhi to sleep, his daughter being swept away to the enchanted land of dreams by her mother' tales of princes and pirates, gins and ghosts. Though he would pretend nonchalance, he enjoyed those stories as much as Ruhi did somehow and later their daughter would fall asleep holding their hands.

During those nights he would sometimes wake up for a glass of water or to use the washroom and always the pleasure of watching Ishita and Ruhi cuddled up together would warm his heart, setting it aflutter with the way this woman has changed his world. A corner of his heart, he has yet to set free would need forceful restraining in those moments lately, for it longed to invade that space shared by the mother and daughter duo, he would be so tempted to huddle close to Ruhi and hold both of them in his arms. If the fear of her reaction wasn't present in his heart and mind, he would have done just that - hold them both in his arms as he slept the night away.

These days he misses those things - sleeping with Ruhi in between them, though that had happened last night, but it was not the same since Ishita was clearly not amused with the idea. She is not setting his clothes, giving him tea or fussing over him nowadays; even when he purposely keeps his wet towel on the bed she remains unfazed when before she would make him go berserk with the lectures about the heights of his carelessness.

She had stopped the car for a few minutes on their way to home at a medical store and he had watched her form as she had left him alone in the car and quietly came back in a few minutes, not saying a word as to why she got off. He wanted to ask her if she is okay but held his tongue, worried she would give him a cold stare and snub him much like she did the other day and asked Mihir to give her a hand to get off the elevator stuck midway in his office. Her rebukes he can handle, her ignoring him though hurts him more; no, he cannot take it and hence kept quiet.

They arrived home about half an hour later and immediately rushed to their room. Quietly for the first time in days, she does something he cannot believe. On her own accord she touches him, as she taps his shoulder quietly and gestures for him to sit on the bed when he was about to remove a fresh set of clothes to change, since the ones worn by them are drenched with rain.

Without a word of protest, he sits down and notices she is holding the first aid kit in her hand. She takes his injured hand gently and removes the soiled handkerchief she had tied around it, as a stopgap to curb the bleeding.

Cleaning the wound with an antiseptic, she quietly nurses his wound as he keeps on staring at her. Once or twice her eyes meet his but she quickly looks away. It is only once she is done with the bandage that she speaks to him.

"Remove your shirt." She tells him without meeting his eyes.

"What?"

Not expecting that request, he asks her to make sure he was not hallucinating what he just heard her say.

Sucking in a breath, she closes her eyes and repeats her words, slowly and precisely.

"I said remove your shirt."

If it were their usual times, he would have launched into a teasing session by now, ensuring she blushes beetroot red, as he would accuse her of making a move on him, eyeing his virtue.

Sadly, this is not one of those times, so he allows the words to sink in and quietly does as asked by her.

It is only when he watches her remove a vial and a needle from her handbag panic sets into him.

"What... what are you doing with that thing?" He asks her his eyes huge and his heart racing.

Knowing his fear of needles and his propensity for histrionics, she shakes her head, and sits beside him again before replying.

"Giving you a tetanus shot, your hand was cut on the metal edge of a table when you...you were beating Parmeet up, you could get infected, this is for your own good."

He almost jumps up as her hand is about to envelope around his arm,

"I already told you I don't need a shot."

"Because you are Superman... Raman it's just a needle, relax it won't hurt, you won't even notice when it's done."

"I said I don't want an injection."

Having had enough of reasoning with him, she holds his hand and forces him to sit down on the bed and in a tone that actually has him scared that she might just poke the needle if he doesn't pay heed to her,

"Shut up Raman, I am not asking you for permission here, it'll be over in a minute and if you try to argue with me, trust me I would just jab the needle and not be bothered where I do it."

She just vocalized his fear and if he were not scared enough out of his wits and sure, of her threat, he would have resisted more, but the fact is his heart somehow finds a strange peace in this moment. It has been days since she has spoken to him so much at length even if she wants to inject him, much less shown her concern in such an evident manner.

Closing his eyes, he nods his consent. Since he cannot hold her hand, his reflexes come into play when he feels a coolness on his skin, as she dabs cotton on a patch of his arm and he holds onto her knee tightly. He feels her movements cease for a while before he hears with the tinkling of her bangles that she has resumed her activities. True to her word, the needle does not prick and the thing is over in no time, only...he does not open his eyes, does not let go off her.

She removes the hand placed on her knee a moment later and speaks up,

"It's done Raman; you can open your eyes."

He knew it was over but could not make himself let go off her but now he has no option but to do as asked.

Wanting to prolong these moments, he says the first thing that comes to him.

"Thank you... you were right, it didn't hurt, I... I never even realized when you injected me."

She looks at him without scorn or anger for a moment and then nodding her head gets up from the bed and disposes of the needle and vial in the bin placed in a corner of their room. Later she quietly moves towards the cupboard, and takes out a fresh set of clothes for herself.

She is about to leave the room when something makes her stop in her tracks and she turns around.

Quietly she says her next words that anger him immediately,

"You shouldn't have done that, there was no need to beat up Parmeet."

Immediately he is on his feet and in her face,

"Shouldn't have done that? Are you crazy? How dare he mistreat you? What do you expect me to do huh? Stand around like a spectator and watch when that dog or any other man misbehaves with you? If you think, I would do that you are crazy for sure, as I will not take it, no man can misbehave with my wife and get away with it. I don't regret doing what I did today or ever will, in fact he so much as comes within ten feet near you I would do as I said - I would kill him Ishita."

"Why won't you ever understand? God it's useless to expect things from you."

Her response further irks him so when she makes a move to leave the room, he manages to close the distance between them in two long strides and holds her by the arm, turning her to face him. Careful of Ruhi barging in anytime in the room and worrying they may be fighting, as he heard his daughter admit last night to her mother, he bangs the door shut.

With fire in his eyes, he continues in low tones,

"What the hell is that supposed to mean huh? You are defending that smug bas***d and accusing me of being thoughtless?"

She releases her arm from his hold before continuing,

"I am not defending that filthy man Raman, but just asking you to think before you act. We were in the court premises; do you realize you could have been arrested for doing what you did? There is enough tension as it is, if you were arrested it would have just added to our tension."

Seeing the reason behind her words, he cools down but refuses to regret his actions nonetheless.

"I ... I wish I could say I am sorry for what I did but I am not, will never be but I would be careful and try to control my anger from now on."

"Thank you."

She is about to open the door when he speaks again.

"Ishita... thank you."

She assumes he is still talking about the shot and gives him a small smile after days for a reply when he continues,

"For making Ruhi take care of me the other night, letting her sleep here with me."

She was not expecting this, but instead of confirming anything she merely looks away as she speaks,

"I don't know what you mean; I didn't do anything or ask Ruhi for doing any of those things too."

He is amused enough to smile at that as he looks tenderly at her,

"When will you ever accept? You are a terrible liar Ishita."

He shakes his head once he is done. This woman... does she think he knows so little of her after all this time too.

She merely manages to look at him for a moment before she makes a move to leave again and turns around but this time stops herself on her own accord.

"Thank you for defending Amma in the court today."

She had been angry with her mother post the trial when she learned she had requested Neil to work out a way to end this case and win it at any cost, since she wanted to end the differences between her husband and her, she was willing to be even called unstable for that.

She understood her mother' concern and love but it still hurt her to think, her mother had to resort to this only because the man she is married to is siding with his ex due to some unknown reason. She had been thankful, moved though when Raman openly defended Amma in the court today, and admonished Neil for resorting to such tactics.

"It was the right thing to do."

With the words spoken suddenly... there is tension amidst them. They stand still locked in a battle of wills. He blinks away first as he bows down his head, and speaks up,

"You can change in here; I will use the bathroom to change."

As he moves towards the wardrobe to get those fresh set of clothes out for himself, she continues to look at her husband and wonders what has happened to this man, she knows his strong moral compass, his hatred for lies and deceit and tries to figure out what went wrong this time. Why is he behaving the way he is, he is not this person she knows him.

The lie he made about being with Shagun during the time of the accident has made her completely sure he is under some sort of pressure, now that she thinks about it... it seems Parmeet just gave him a reason to release all that pent up anger and frustration he has been holding back for days.

She wishes he would speak up what is bothering him, say why he is doing the things that are so uncharacteristic of him but knows it is useless to ask him anything. He will not utter a word; if even drunk he would not then it is no use even bothering to confront him right now.

She moves aside to allow him to exit the room and once he is out, she closes the door shut, locks it up. Supporting her back against the frame of the door, she leans her head, closes her eyes and lets out a few quiet tears, hugging her clothes tightly wondering what went wrong between them, trying to understand the mess that her life has become of late.

She wonders if the equilibrium of her life will ever be balanced again, wonders if at all things would be restored to the way they were.

She misses the happiness that was quietly seeping in her life, in her heart of late with the blossoming tenderness that was tentatively creeping between them.

She misses his quick wit and sharp tongue, the way he would tease her and always be ready with a sarcastic comment or two.

She misses the man she came to know as her friend and husband even when he is under the same roof as she is, unable to recognize a version of him that baffles her mind and tramples her heart even as she sees the remorse and guilt evident on his face for doing this to her.

She misses him and his smiles.

She misses them.

Aani
once again beautiful write up 👏👏
perfectly put emotional separation of both persons 👏
Even she does not know what is running in her heart how much she wants him despite of open declaration rejecting him she gets melted in nano seconds shows how much she is mad for him and how much she is missing old days 😭

same goes for him . he has hurt her but those actions have hurt him more than her .
how much he wants to be physically attached with his little world 😭

he is not in state of facing more rejections,when her ST is giving him pain enough

It has been days since she has spoken to him so much at length even if she wants to inject him, much less shown her concern in such an evident manner.
She removes the hand placed on her knee a moment later and speaks up, oh my god He knew it was over but could not make himself let go off her but now he has no option but to do as asked.

this is best part for me ^^
he had noticed and now is missing her caring of him these days. 😭

I really feel it should have been showed he would thank her for ruhi feeding and making him sleep
**sigh** so many things are made skipped

Edited:

Oh Aani, it's was a fabulous and heartbreaking Os particularly in the last paragraph where she missed her husband, her Ravan Kumar. I am sure the viewers also miss the usual Raman Kumar Bhalla. His one liners and endless tease toward his wife.

Raman is the king of one liners and master of teasers. Soon he will be the king of romance. 😳

I always saw Raman as the protector of the family and Ishita as the heart of the family and Ruthi as their Cupid and happiness. this was clearly demonstrated in your Os 👏 😛

awesome ❤️ so touching so emotional
ur a fabulous writer Aani 👍🏼 keep it up !!!👏

Omg...what a emotional and heart touching puece of writing...

Beautiful One-Shot...👍🏼

No PMs ??? Itna Zulm mat karo yaar :(
Res... Will unres rust n stardust first and then come here !

*** EDITED

Hey Aani,

First thing first."I would like this scene to happen on the show" This is what I thought when I first read it the day you posted the story. I saw spoilers and the next epi later, so I guess it didn't happen 😭

It is indeed complicated between. they know they need each other, want each other. But there are so many things that need to be sorted out. And the pattern always seems to be that Ishita applies a 'cure' on his 'wounds'. In spite of that and maybe because of that, Raman knows she will always be with him.

Again, at the end I like it how you ended with a hope. Because no matter what, both of them want to get back to the friendly banter, the playful relationship. Most of all, they still want to be communicating with each other. Isnt that something we all want to see ???

very well written my friend, with every story you tell us a tale that we wish was shown to us on screen👏

"I was thinking how complicated life is and how there are no simple roads or paths. We are a fabric of mistakes and hurts; a family tree of fumbled attempts, successes and failures." - Belinda Jeffrey, One Long Thread

P.S: You shouldnt really worry about sending PMs hun. If it EVER gets remotely spamful... I will be the first one to tell you. and thats a promise. I know it will NEVER happen 😊

Aani Thanks a lot for writing on my request. It means a lot. Thank you. 🤗