Story: Wilted| Chapter 3 Forgotten Puzzles|Page 7

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Piu Chatterjee

@Transference

Stunner

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#41

Hi Dee,
I have very recently come across this forum and while checking posts just was glued to your story.Sorry I should have commented earlier but its never too late...So here are my bits for the opening chapter.INTRIGUING!! INTERESTING!!INNOVATIVE-Build up for a story which keeps you imagining every detail which you pen down.The writing is so crisp yet so descriptive,prose yet poetry..I love the intro through the protagonist's eyes kinda giving us an impression what her life has been uptill now.Lonely ,yearning and a recluse soul...Hmm wonders what has led to her being wrapped in a cocoon.Lovely writing and just cannot wait to read the next chapter...😊Will be back with my comments.
-Piu

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Piu Chatterjee

@Transference

Stunner

+ 5

Posted: 12 years ago

#42

Dee,
Been through all the chapters in a go.Superb build up and then emotions while reading this are too strong.A lonely woman who is talented yet secluded,cold outwards yet the warmth of her heart seeps through her eyes and gestures when teaches those little kids .I guess it's her soul's way of giving expression to the love which might have been denied or deprived all her life.I love Roshni's character build up..It makes you feel for her.The language is fluid and the expression is lucid.Lovely !! ...I can see Roshni through your eyes..BTW I have tried something for your story...I am in love with it and this is what Roshni looks like to me .Hope you like it!!

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_IcePrincess_

@_IcePrincess_

Inactive

Posted: 12 years ago

#43

You have such a fantastic way of writing, Dee.👏 I just read the prologue, the 1st chapter and the second chapter together, and the whole melancholy touch has left me a lil speechless right now...
I must tell you that I'm a big antisocial, and I know how it is. And you have described the feelings so nicely, in such incredible detail, you could even be living in my mind for all I know!😆 I can identify with Roshni in so many places, (listening to Taylor Swift's songs catering to my mood and things I want to say at that time, for eg). I don't know how you are, a bit lyk Roshni or not like her at all, but one thing I do know, I myself wouldn't be able to describe my own thoughts such beautifully, let alone get into somebody else's shoes and write down their feeling soo accurately. And I think that's what makes one a great writer!
The prologue about how everyone shunned Roshni, the 1st and 2nd chapter portraying Roshni's daily life and bringing out the pain in her heart through those simple day-to-day doings, it was just too beautiful for words!
And I just realised that it's a big enough post for "being speechless".😆 So I'm gonna stop here, I guess!
Continue soon!😊

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Deeksha

@-Dee-

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#44

Piu - Thank you so much for the banner. Thank you for being so thoughtful! 😊

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Deeksha

@-Dee-

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#45

To all - I am sorry for being such a late kate but I have hoards of eligible excuses. The most recent one being I don't have an internet connection. But worry not, I shall write the next few chapters in bulk and post them soon enough. Thank you for being patient those who are still on Roshni's journey. :)

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Deeksha

@-Dee-

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#46

Wilted || Sometimes

Sometimes I walk - unfettered by the directions of a map.

Sometimes I sit and ponder over many a things - lost and never found.

Sometimes I crave for things I had let go of - things and people.

Sometimes tears roll down my cheeks unchecked by my handkerchief.

Sometimes, when I let them, I let myself I find my vulnerability just a farce. Sometimes I find myself at fault.

Sometimes when I laugh and listen to my own laughter, why does its hollowness ring so true?

Sometimes when I forget all about it and look up at the sky and feel the breeze caressing my tresses which have come unbound, I smile - smile that real smile and want that sometimes is all the time.

Chapter Two | Page four

Chapter Three | Page Seven

Edited by -Dee- - 12 years ago

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Ameres

@Ameres

Stunner

Posted: 12 years ago

#47

Ah! Finally a little something from you and sometimes I wish that you would update sometime soon. =P

Okay, that was lame but why aren't you updating? Hope everythings fine at your end...still the internet issue?

This little piece was very nice, last line esp made me smile because its so true. Sigh.

Waiting to know more about Roshni. :)

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Deeksha

@-Dee-

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#48

Originally posted by: Ameres
Ah! Finally a little something from you and sometimes I wish that you would update sometime soon. =P
Okay, that was lame but why aren't you updating? Hope everythings fine at your end...still the internet issue?

This little piece was very nice, last line esp made me smile because its so true. Sigh.

Waiting to know more about Roshni. :)

Hey there,

I know, it's been so long... too long. I haven't been updating because of the internet problem and also because I have scrapped out whatever I write for like three times now. My exams get over on 15th and my board results out on 18th. I will try to be regular hence forth. Thanks for wanting to know more about Roshni. She wants to tell you more - just can't get her words right at the moment. :)

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gypsy

@gypsy

Inactive

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#49

I need to catch up on this ...Will be back with my detailed comment soonish..

Btw I just read your small piece on the previous page and you HAVE to tell me what were you thinking when you wrote the piece.

That is sooo...Ah I'll let you know in my comment. 😉 😆

Post No: 928 😎

Edited by gypsy - 12 years ago

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Deeksha

@-Dee-

Dazzler

+ 3

Posted: 12 years ago

#50

Originally posted by: gypsy
I need to catch up on this ...Will be back with my detailed comment soonish..

Btw I just read your small piece on the previous page and you HAVE to tell me what were you thinking when you wrote the piece.

That is sooo...Ah I'll let you know in my comment. 😉 😆

Post No: 928 😎

Look who is here! I hope you catch up soon and I'm eagerly looking forward to your comments. In case you forget, remember that Dee is here to nag until you do. ;-)