*~H.G.O.R.C. #543~*- $~Invites Only~$ - Page 112

jab Ap sone ki koshish karo na raat ko or na he din ko nend aye, to socho os se bhari saza or kya hogi zindagi ki taraf se,

or meri life main jo 1 sath itne sare tofaan a gaye, mujhe abhe tak nahi pata on sab ke piche akhir meri kya galti thi,

main ne to apni life kuch na kuch seekhne main guzzar di, baki ki mazakh karne main, tang karne main, mujhe nahi pata main ne kab or kon si galti ki. agr mujhe pata chal jata to main os ko har keemat par fix karne ki koshish zaroor karta,

is cheez mai mere apne help nahi kar rahe sahi tarhan se, main on se kuch puchon to wo eysi tareef kar dete hain meri jis ke baad main on ko reply he nahi karta, kiyon ke main tareef kabil hoon he nahi, jab tha mujhe tab bhe pasand nahi tha koi mere tareef kare, os ki zarorat nahi thi na hai,

main kisi se apni tareef is liye sun sakta kiyon ke main manta hoon jo insaan acha ho os ke sath kabhe bura ho he nahi sakta :) ager main acha hota to eysa na hota simple

kuch chezon main bohot lucky bhe hoon main, jitna main ne seekha apni life main wo har koi nahi kar sakta,

logon ko lagta hai mujhe bus computer ata hai, wo galat hain, mujhe or bohot se kaam atey hain jo main ne khud seekhe, zeyada nahi pure 21. lol on sab main utna he professional hoon jitna computers main, ye main ne khud seekha apni life main,

or dosri cheez log peson ke piche bhagte hain, lekin yahan pese mere piche bhaag rahe hain, wo mujhe khushi nahi de sakte is liye mujhe zarorat nahi,

log 1 din main 8 se 12 hours ki job karte hain , bohot mushil hai on keyliye pese kamana, or  1 main hoon 1 saal main 1 he deal kar doon na to pure saal keyliye itne pse mil jate hain mujhe ke or kisi ki zaorat he nahi, or wo bhe bina kisi mehnat ke,

ye sab wo chezain hain mere paas jo duniya main har kisi ke paas nahi hain,

mere paas siraf 1 cheez nahi hai, osi ki waja se meri life main kuch bhe nahi hai,

main ne apni zindagi ka 1 khas time on logon ke sath guzarne ki koshish ki jin ki age 60+ thi ta ke main seekh sakon life kis tarhan se wahan tak jati hai,

or main ne abhe tak kisi ko ye kehte nahi suna ke sab theek tha, main ne apni life ko jab agey le ke jane ka socha tha to sab logon ki baton ko samne rakh kar, main chahta tha ye na ho jab main 60 ke age pe jaon ga to yehi batain main karon, ager phir bhe koi kami reh jaye to itni zeyada nahi,

or itne plan ke sath sab karne wale insaan ka aaj ye haal hai, ankhon main ansu hain, dil barbaad ho chuka hai, andar se bhe bahir se bhe,

or mujhe pata he nahi hova kiyon eysa,!!

main ne apni university ko pura nahi kiya, zid main a kar, mujhe khud pe yakeen tha main ye sabit karna chahta tha mujhe degree nahi chahiye life ko acha karne keyliye, kya ye meri galti thi? kiyon ke wesa hova nahi na, jo main kaha tha wesa kiya, millions ka busns bana diya ab main karta, or ager os pe dheyan diya jaye to wo billions pe ja sakta hai, millions he nahi,!

to kya indonesia jana meri galti thi? wahan mushkil waqat tha, lekin mujhe is level pe indonesia ne he aney ki help ki.. wo bhe galti nahi nazar ati mujhe.

kya 27 may 2012 meri galti thi? shayed nahi, wo to 1 din tha jab koi mujhe mila as frined,

to kya14 april 2014 meri galti thi,?  ye ager hogi bhe to main maan nahi sakta, meri life main sab se khubusat waqat tha, os ko main galat nahi kehne wala.

main ne pura week socha.. apni life ko jab se main ne hosh sambhala hai na har 1 pal ko yaad kiya, ache kaam bhe or funny bhe, logon ko tang karna, A to Z sab, shayed main 1 perfect insaan tha, jis ne koi eysi galti nahi ki thi jis se dosron ki life main koi tention hoti ya meri khud ki life main,

ager meri waja se mere kisi dost ya koi eysa insaan jis se taluq tha koi galti hoi to main ne fix kiya os ko or jab fix kiya to galti, galti nahi rahi.....

ager kisi ki galtiyon ki waja se meri life main kuch galat hova hai to main os ko theek nahi kar saka,

yahan fix karne ke 2 raste they, 1 to wohi main bhe same wesa he karta jesa mere sath hova tha, bhula deta, naam tak na leta,

dosra rasta tha sab kuch wapis fix karne ka,

in dono baton main koi problem nahi thi, kisi ko bhula deta to sari tention khatam, meri life phir se khubsurat ho jati wapis.

or ager 2nd wale ki baat ki jaye to wo bhe galat nahi thi, mera kisi ki life main rehna ya na rehna os se kisi ko bill to nahi a raha tha, or na he meri life main kisi ke hone se mujhe koi problem thi, balke khushi thi, dil khush tha sab ok tha,

or main ye dono he nahi kar saka, pehle wala mere hath main tha bhula dena wo main nahi kar saka,

dosra tha kisi ke sath wapis sab theek kar lena or wo main khud kar nahi sakta tha,

dono he baton main haar meri hoi, nuksaan mera hova,

jab log eysa bolte hain na main ignore kar deta hoon, or mujhe ab dukh hota hai,

mere Mom Dad jesa mujhe dekhna chahte they main wesa tha, ab nahi hoon..

or dosra main itni tareef ke kabil nahi hoon.

eysa nahi karna chahiye logon ko, koi hai jis ke mu se eysi batain main ne bohot suni thin, 2 saal tak aaj os ki nazar mei main 1 janwar se zeyada kuch nahi . is liye meri tareef main sunta nahi, mujhe pata hai ye log kuch waqat keyliye eysa karte hain

kuch log eysa is liye bolte hain kiyon ke wo mujhe bachpan se jante hain, shayed wo is galat fehmi main ke main andar se wesa he hoon, koi yakeen nahi kar raha ke main mar chuka hoon andar se...

main 1 sad or 1 haara hova insaan hoon ab, or utna he zindagi naam ki cheez se dar bhe geya hoon,

or mujhe apne doston ki kuch batain dukh deti hain, wo samjhte hain main kar sakta hoon, lekin nahi kar sakta main, mujhe eysa feel hota hai jese meri legs toot chuki hain or sab keh rahe hon ansar bhaago tum jeet sakte ho.

mere paas family hai, ache friends hain, tab bhe mujhe feel hota hai mera akela hoon,

main kisi se apne dil ki baat kehta he nahi hoon ab, wo is liye kiyon ke main explain nahi kar sakta,

na to mujhe smoking ka shok tha, mujhe nafrt thi,

or na he mujhe marne ka shok tha, na he main ye chahta tha mujhe heart attack aye,

lekin main or kya karon. meri life 1 din guzaar lo koi, sachi sare dua karoge ansar duniya se chala jaye,

eyes red ho gayin.

is se pehle rona shoro ho jaon, bed pe jana chahiye,