DARK KNIGHT- A SwaSan FF- T2- DELETED- AN- PG 1 - Page 61

awesome work👏

Shruuu baby...muahhh😊

Shru 🤗

Res 😊

Un-Res

Shru my dear...I am so glad that I un-res'd my comment on #15, late Sunday night...you'd said you'd be updating #16 during the course of the week, but as you usually do, you over delivered on timelines, giving us this lovely present on Monday morning. 🤗 A surefire way to beat those morose Monday morning blues...to soak oneself in the sheer drama and excitement of the early 1800s, on the borders of Maheshpur! 🤗 🤗 🤗

And the way you've skilfully described Devendra---made him seem cold, reptilian almost. A superb contrast drawn between him and our gallant Prince, the Mermaid Princess' Knight in Shining Armor. Devendra, as you so well put it, is boyishly handsome and dapper. But his eyes are cold, speaking of a malice and cruelty that I fear, he enjoys inflicting. And he already shows early signs of debauchery and indulgence...no wonder, we see later, he is so jealous of the sterling achievements of Prince Sanskaar, who must have overshadowed him at every turn!

Devendra seemed to have his suspicions of Sanskaar's true identity awakened when he saw Veer, and Sanskaar's concealed collection of knives and swords upon his person, didn't he? And the disgusting way he insisted Swara ride with him back to camp---that man is a vile devil! Though I was seething in rage and anxiety at that point, one powerful statement came through---when Sanskaar insists that Swara is his--no matter that lack of mangalsutra and sindhoor which Devendra taunted them about. That was a cover for them he was trying to maintain all right---but that statement came out of a powerful groundswell of emotion he feels for her. He really does feel the subconscious bond they have, doesn't he? If only he would allow his conscious mind to act on that...

The entire scene during the ride to the camp, and at the camp itself, was so well described, Shru. Despite Swara's valiant attempts to describe them as "Vikaram"--a trader, and his soon to be wife "Maithili"; Devendra has more or less had his doubts as to their true identity confirmed. Sanskaar was furiously thinking of what Devendra could be upto, and all along his worry was about the unseemly interest he seemed to be taking in Swara.

And once at the camp--the sly Devendra Singh Rathore shows exactly how unworthy he is. When you had described in chap #15, that the mysterious phantom force wore a strange uniform, I did suspect that their leader who rode up in the end, would be neither Adarsh nor Lakshya. I did think it was another enemy of Sanskaar's--but boy, the fact that this very man would be the person who had the map stolen--that was a bit of a surprise! But Shru, Shru---I still suspect the sword is with Adarsh!! I still think Adarsh is in cahoots with Devendra! And I guess all the signs are, that Kavita was the honey trap for Sanskaar, which Devendra had assiduously planted. She might even be Devendra's mistress now?

This unworthy scion is soon revealed to be a coward and a bully right from their childhood years; apart from being a base traitor. And the reason for his jealous hatred towards Sanskaar is all too clear---Sanskaar always outshone him at their training camps, was far more popular and a brilliant General, and stymied his and his cronies plans to bully and browbeat Lakshya.

That was a nice hint there, of Sanskaar's protectiveness and genuine elder brotherly affection towards Lakshya in the past. And Pawan also seems to have helped Sanskaar, been his right hand man, even from those days. (Though you imply there was little love lost between Lakshya and Pawan). Pawan probably only defended Lakshya as a matter of duty, since he was Sanskaar's cousin, right? And Lakshya probably felt very resentful that Pawan did not give him the same fealty and loyalty he showered upon Sanskaar. Plus, younger brothers are often jealous of their elder brother's close pals---they always feel threatened of being overshadowed, that the brotherly bond is being replaced by the bond of friendship, perhaps?

I was cheering loudly when a bound Sanskaar head butted and kicked that toad Devendra, making his nose bleed and causing him to double over in agony!! 👏👏 But he manages to get his hands on the Maheshwari part of the map, on searching Sanskaar's saddle bags. 😕 The interesting part is, however, the missing key to the map, which he proceeds to snarlingly question Sanskaar about. What a Prince, our Sanskaar! He calmly declares that he doesn't have the key, and wouldn't talk about it, no matter what!

Devendra then reveals the complete coarse baseness of his nature. For one, he says he is going to summon one of his men, who is probably well versed in torturing people to extract secrets. Torture of the most inhuman kind, much worse even perhaps, than that vile toad Bagri inflicted on Sanskaar. Or could this be Bagri himself? Was Bagri always a Rathore double agent?

And for another, he decides to taunt Sanskaar about what he is going to do with Swara. 🤢 😡 He seemed to have his eyes on her from the beginning, and he now says he is going to "deal with her." Man, I wish lightning would strike that waste of a man!

Sanskaar just became a furious, protective, snarling beast at that, didn't he. Typical of a valiant, noble warrior. He steels himself to any pain, any torture inflicted on himself, but the thought of any pai or dishonor being visited on the person he adores, especially the lady who has captured his heart and soul, he would just become wild.

Swara tries a valiant attempt at the close of the chapter, pretending she was kidnapped at knife point by Sanskar; and threatened with death unless she pretended to be traveing with him willingly. She has now asked Devendra to escort her safely back to her family...but would Devendra believe her? Or take advantage of her? Sanskaar, who has the measure of that vile man better than Swara does, closed his eyes in sheer despair...not an encouraging sign. 😕

Update #17 soon, darling!

Lots of Love,

---Viji

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Shruti,
You love giving heart attacks don't you? 😆 My heart is in my mouth with all that I have just read. Suddenly I wish it was Lakshya instead of Devendra. You really have got another character much more hatable than Lakshya. I have a question - Is Adarsh in league with Devendra? From everything you mentioned Pawan is the friend Devendra is referring to, but why do I feel Adarsh could be in league with Devendra?? Pawan is definitely loyal to Sanskaar. There is no way he has changed sides. He probably must have realised who the real traitor is and must have staged his own death to take Devendra down and help his best friend!!
(Am I guessing/imagining too much? I cant help it. Your story takes me to another world and I start imagining sooo much more!!!) 😛
Shruti, you have taken this story to another level. I swear with each update I think it cannot get better than this and then you go and outdo yourself. Hats off.! 👏
We finally know who the real traitor is. What an amazing way to unfold it all. Your quote at the start was ao apt for this chapter. I have to say you really know how to hook your readers to this story. All the secrets that have been revealed along with the SwaSan captivity just makes this chapter enthralling and so gripping. Its a warrior thing that they can take any amount of harm and pain to themselves but the moment their loved one/their woman is threatened, they go berserk. You have shown Sanskaar's thoughts on that so well. He is trying to find ways to distract Devendra from Swara and realising its futile and Swara has ingeniously come up with the plan to sweet talk Devendra. She is truly a wonder really! I have enjoyed this chapter immensely.
Eager for the next update. :)
-V
P.S.: Sorry for the double post. My phone has turned against me. *sigh*

Shruti,
Since I double posted here is a quote for you:

'The greatest compliment a writer can be given is that a story and character hold a reader spellbound.' -Iris Johansen

My feelings on your writing and story. 😊
Cheers,
V

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