SwaSan TS: Karna Parva---Day 17-- COMPLETED

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javeria

@Javeria3991

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+ 5

Posted: 9 years ago

#41

awesome update

can't wait to read more

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#42

Originally posted by: maaneetfan
Darling this was just the most wonderful piece of writing I've read even from you..each of your descriptions right from the dawning of the sun and it's brilliant array of colors to the passionate lovemaking of swasan to the entire past story of durga prasad and Kaveri to even the devilish beauty of Ragini...each of the lines conjure up vivid images that make m feel like I'm just there...each of these events are taking place right in front of my eyes!!

Yay so I knew my ram prasad was not guilty...and it is indeed a matter that would make Swara and sanskaar pity Durga prasad...the same man whom sanskaar revered all his life even more than his own father...in fact before this day maybe even sanskaar didn't have the true measure of ram prasad and his ideals.

My respect fr RP grew so much more and fell so much more for DP when dp asks sanskaar to give up his own shares just in order to keep face in front of his family,??? After all these years he can't face up to the truth...that is a major weakness and I can understand sanskaar's need to be away from all this after he has handed over everything coz I'm sure deep down he feels sort of disgusted that this highly idealistic man whom he idolized all his life is so weak as to bow down to this sort of blackmail and that too for his own past actions and because of that some innocent people have to suffer...I'm pretty disgusted for one!! Poor RP he protested for all he was worth but he knew this time there was nothing he could do to stop sanskaar from promising to his uncle.

Though personally I do feel it is a foolish act by DP as it is always the case with blackmailers that they never give up even after they get their full demands coz greed never ends and here Ragini is greedy not for money but for complete revenge and just getting complete control over the company and household even is not going to satisfy her for long...it will just inspire her to search for newer avenues to torture the maheshwari's ...

The end was rather a cliffhanger Viji...so will sanskaar just hand over and leave the place or will he find some way to fight Ragini tooth and nail???

Can't wait for the weekend now my dear! Do update soon as there is nothing worth waiting for in the tv episodes so m just thriving on these beautiful ff's 😊

Tasneem

Hey Tas dear...🤗 🤗

Thanks so very much for that amazingly lovely comment. I was so touched by all the warm words, I am just really happy that you loved this so much.

I just love sunrises, you see 😊 so I can't resist writing them into some of my Fics. Besides, as you know in the Mahabharata, Karna is the son of Surya, so the scene had a relevance to the theme and setting as well.

And errmm...the SwaSan scene---I so want the two of them to escape from that Mentaleshwari mansion and go for their long overdue honeymoon 😳 ☺️. That's why I gave them a nice overnight stay at the farmhouse. At least let them have 12 hours to themselves!! 😉

Yeah, your intuition was perfectly right dear. Ram Prasad was being the perfect brother, shielding his elder brother, both in the past as well as in the present. I would like to think that Sanskaar has inherited his traits of loyalty, his integrity, patience, and strength of character from his own father.

The way I saw it in this OS series, Durga Prasad definitely has shades of grey. He promises to give complete control over their home, their business and their wealth to Ragini; when in fact he does not have the right to give away Sanskaar's share. And though he feels a lot of remorse for his sordid indiscretion in the past, he is prepared to do anything to prevent his aura, his image from getting dented in the eyes of his wife and sons. Even to the extent of demanding a favor from his nephew, whose share of the business he has actually no rights over.

I am also of the same opinion as you, Tas. Its high time Sanskaar took Swara and left to his apartment. Or back to the farmhouse. The family takes both of them too much for granted.

Ram Prasad does do his very best to protect his son from this unjust and unreasonable demand. After all, he wants to stand by Sanskaar, to ensure he gets his due happiness, and that he is treated fairly by the family. But he is unable to prevent Sanskaar from agreeing to Durga Prasad's request, because Sanskaar is so generous and big hearted, he could never refuse his bade papa's request for a favor.

You are again right, in the fact that giving into blackmail is never a good option. That would just embolden Ragini to further and further acts of vengeance, she can always blackmail them again with the same secret. Let's see what happens in the next part---after all a person who they didn't expect, has come in to the study room. Wonder what this person knows, and what they have to say? 😉

I'll do my utmost to update over the weekend, dear.

Thanks again for your very analytical and detailed comment. 🤗

Love,

---Viji

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#43

Originally posted by: rithika2015
hey viji.. 🤗🤗
totally loved this os..
right from the way swasan initially kept a check to ragini's plans to swasan reunion and the development of the bond between them and finally the much awaited union of these two loving souls..
everything was just perfect and damn awesome. the way u described everything makes me go awww... love u for it dear..
coming to the day -16 and day -17
i loved the way u twisted the plot from ram prasad to durga prasad. it was really interesting to read a different shade of durga prasad.
i just loved the way u described sanskaar's state after misunderstanding his father and the way swara assured him about her love for him and finally the union. it was just beautiful and the timing was really superb.
i even loved the back story of kaveri. u have weaved a very convincing story around them the characters of kaveri, durga prasad and ram were kept intact.
i seriously love this ram prasad in ur writings and i miss to see this is show. i guess the cv's have made him a mute viewer he doesnt have neither a dialogue nor any expression he is just a mute spectator in the show.
coming to the confrontations i just loved the small, crisp yet straight forward confrontation between the father and son duo. and even the confrontation of DP with Rp and sanskaar along with swara was awesomely penned down. the dependence of swasan on each other is excellently described. and im in love with this sanskaar who always seeks support and strength from his wife and even stands like a pillar when she needs that.
i just loved the clever decision of sanskaar to give away the property for her bade papa's sake and protect his self respect by leaving the house. and im really happy with the swara in this who thinks practically and stands by her husband.

actually i didnot read the previous os since many days as i have seen u left it at cliff hanger and since i cant bear suspense i thought to leave it till u update it completely. when i saw day 17 updated i read it only to find that u left it at a more higher suspense point. please do update quickly..😭 i cant bear suspense..

i dont know how the next part is gonna be but i want you to write something in lines of ragini taking the property but the mm people leaving the house and leading new and happy life in a small house starting a new business all togther and then dadi and ragini realising their mistakes.

last but not least thank u so much for such an awesome os and inspiring quotes..🤗🤗
waiting eagerly for the update

with love
rithu..

Hey Rithu dear...🤗 🤗

Thanks a ton for your lovely comment yaar. I was really touched that you'd commented on all 3 Chapters, Very happy to hear that you liked them.

In Dyuta Parva, I had wanted to show Swara making determined efforts to convince Sanskaar about the depth and intensity of her genuine feelings for him, to assuage his pain, and win his trust back. Their love for each other was not in doubt, but the trust and belief Sanskaar had in her had suffered, since he felt hurt that she had taken him for granted. I wanted to show the gradual and steady restoration of their bond, the reconciliation between them.

Regarding Ragini, yeah there were so many legal alternatives to prevent her from grabbing control of he business like she did on the show. I wanted to portray SwaSan countering her together, with some help from Ram Prasad.

You're so right, Rithu, in the serial they hardly give Ram Prasad anything to do at all. Not even a sentence of dialogue! But I felt he has to have a lot of depth to his character. After all, he is Sanskaar's father, and I feel sure, he would have massively regretted the crisis which happened in his son's life 5 years back; and the fact that he could not be there for him then. I feel he would definitely want to ensure Sanskaar's happiness in the present, and would do his best to ensure that the family treats him justly.

Thanks for all your very special words about Chapters 2 and 3 also. I wanted to show how Sanskaar's sense of indentity and self, the values he felt confident he had inherited, were shaken when they misunderstood that conversation between Kaveri and Ram. And though he tries to be stoic and handle the pain on his own, he is tremendously reassured when Swara shows her confidence and unshakable faith in him. And being the soulmates that they are, they are destined to solve their problems and come together. 😳 ☺️

I was so happy to read that you liked the father--son scene between Ram and Sanskaar; as well as the confrontation scene between Durga Prasad, Ram Prasad, Sanskaar and Swara. Thanks so much for thelovely words about the back story I had created for the Maheshwaris and Kaveri. 😊 I felt over the moon to hear your warm words about that.

Regarding SwaSan, I wanted to show them here as recognizing the deep connect that they have, the wonderful understanding that they share. They realize that they really complete and complement each other, and they are always there for each other.

I agree with you yaar---Sanskaar and Swara do need some time away from the Mentaleshwari mansion, where they are both largely taken for granted. They need to go to Sanskaar's apartment, or perhaps back to the farmhouse. 😉

Sorry for leaving it at a bit of a cliffhanger dear. 😊 Will do my utmost to update over the weekend.

Lots of Love,

---Viji

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maaneetfan

@maaneetfan

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#44

Yes I do wonder who it could be and fervently hope it's Annapurna who has heard it all and doesn't need to be protected anymore so that they don't need to give in to Ragini and her blackmail anymore!

Tho I don't like over guessing so I'm completely open for a new twist and some fresh dimension that can change the game!!

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soapbubble

@soapbubble

Inactive

+ 7

Posted: 9 years ago

#45

Lovely, Viji!

Beautifully written and fleshed out.

Ragini IS a fool isn't she? She can't build and she thinks pulling down is victory.

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#46

Originally posted by: The.Lannister
The day begins great for SwaSan 😳

Believe it or not even after reading the previous part I kept on checking again & again if it was actually Ram speaking 🤣 So many lines to him...we are so used to him being on MUTE😆 (totally unrelated: do you know he has played a cop in a few episodes of Crime Patrol😲 The guy can act, he can speak quite well. I wonder instead of introducing new vamps every week why dont these people use the existing bunch of actors effectively)

Oh so there is a barsaat ki ek raat here! Though I am glad it ends very differently from the show🤢

Awwiieee a baby Sanskaar!! He must have been so cute XOXOX

I liked how you showed DP making a conscious decision to be with Kaveri. It wasnt the usual thing with Kaveri being a gold digger or someone who trapped him. He made the decision to be with her inspite of being married & inspite of knowing her background. He chose to imitate Oswal in more than business. Very realistic & completely true to the hypocritical DP from the show👏 And hence it makes me wonder (inspite of what you have written) if he truly decided to end it with Kaveri for Ram or he just used Ram as an excuse to finally end it & escape

Ram is much like Sanskaar or should I say it the other way round😆 The same directness, the same brilliance of getting things done 😳 I really liked this Ram. If only someone could speak up for Sanskaar now! For the first time (in the show) he needs someone to protect him from himself But of course its just hopeless to expect any positivity in that viper pit which is the show.

Wow! Ragini's dialogue. The parallels you drew between Sanskaar & Karna👏 👏 👏 And then her shuddering even after her hollow win

I know who the person is! I know!! It is AP isnt it????😳

Waiting for the concluding part😳

Hey Shruti...🤗 🤗

Oh yes, the morning dawned very well for SwaSan. 😳 ☺️ Well, it started off the morning after the errmmm...night at the farmhouse in the previous part, so ermmm...you get the picture. 😉

You'd told me about Ram Prasad playing a character in some other serial, but hadn't told me which one. Acha, he played a cop on crime patrol is it? Good Lord, why don't they let him speak 5 sentences straight ever? 😕

Yaar Shruti, that party which Ragini threw...when Kaveri (then known as AA 😛) said all those things about barsaat ki raat, and Durga Prasad staggered back against a pillar in sheer distress...It was so obvious that they seemed to be hinting at a liaison. And then, they came up with this ridiculous Kavita back from the dead saga, and for God's sake, Durga Prasad was scared of a photo apparently showing him crouched over a dead body? His lawyers could hit that out of the court for a sixer...and here he was, acting as if he had half a foot in the grave! 😆

So here I decided to stick to my own theory of Durga Prasad having sown a few wild oats. 😆 But yeah, as you said, I wanted to show it as a decision he made, however much it caused him self loathing and disgust. Ultimately he succumbed to the temptation and the allurement, and I definitely didn't want to make it as if Kaveri had got him drunk! (which anyway, I find a lousy excuse 😛), or maybe spiked his juice/ sherbet/ thandai (since I guess he doesn't drink alcohol? 😉)

I always wrote very positive portrayals for Durga Prasad in nearly all my fics to date; I had such a high regard for the man. But the way the show portrayed him pretty much shaved off a huge chunk of my respect. First he just hands over the family business, home and wealth to Ragini, without as much as a modicum of consultation with his brother or his nephew. Poor Sanskaar became the bakra, merged Karma & Co. with Maheshwari & Sons, and promptly got his share also handed over to Ragini on a platter (on the show). That started my disquiet with Durga Prasad...and then the sneaky way he got Swara's signature on those papers, made my blood boil. He didn't even tell Sanskaar about his role in that, he could have so easily spoken to him and prevented that SwaSan MU...

Anyway, I digress. 😊 As I was saying, all these reasons made me feel Durga isn't such a noble character after all, so I wanted to garb him in gray in this OS series. 😊 Regarding your theory of why he finally snapped it off with Kaveri---you know, that's an interesting theory yaar. Frankly, when I was writing it, I thought of it as the former, Ram Prasad impressing on him the mad folly he was indulging in, and reawakening his own latent disgust at this sordid liaison. But one could make a case for the latter as well, I guess. That he was anyway in it just as a casual fling, and Ram's protective intervention gave him an out. His brother would be doing the unpleasant task of facing down Devendra and Kaveri...

Hmmm...you know what, just for the benefit of doubt, I would rather stick to the former. I still want to think of Durga Prasad as a fundamentally good guy, though definitely nowhere near as noble as what we used to think of him , and with quite a bit of a narrower perspective.

You like the thought of a cute, chubby baby Sanskaar? Join the club, hon! 😆 I think he must have been the cutest tyke in all Calcutta! 😉

And I really did want to show a similarity between Sanskaar and Ram in this one. Since my impression of Durga Prasad has taken a hit, I would much rather attribute Sanskaar's loyalty, strength, patience and steely determination to Ram. They can both go to any lengths to protect the ones they love, IMO at least. 😊

I am fast forwarding most of the show these days yaar. record the episode, and watch just the SwaSan scenes...I press my finger so hard on fast forward button for the other scenes, I think I'm gonna break the remote! 😆

And thank you, thank you, thank you 😃 for all those lovely words about Ragini's dialogue, the parallels drawn between Karna and Sanskaar. I know you are a huge MB fan, so this literally made my day today. 🤗 🤗

As to who enters the study, I shall repeat Remus Lupin's statement to Harry Potter: "Your instincts are good, and nearly always right". 😉

Will do my best to update over the weekend.

Lots of Love,

---Viji

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#47

Originally posted by: Nynaeve
Dear Viji,
Res-

Too speechless, actually! Awaiting for the conclusion.
Between withdrawal symptoms (of not watching the show), the angst at the way the current track is going on, your awesome story and the ever looming office deadlines (December closing) - I am on an emotional roller coaster!
I want to read the complete TS and then pen down - maybe that way I would be able to do comments which could be deemed a little worthy!

Nyna

Hey Nyna. ...🤗 Thanks yaar. You did say a number of very sweet things though you said you had no words. 🤗

Hope your office deadlines pass smoothly and don't harass you too much. 😊 December closing sounds tough...I have a cousin who did his CA and he does tell me how demanding the job is...

Am hoping to update the next part over the weekend.

Cheers

Viji

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#48

Originally posted by: prachi_vrushan
awesome update yar
another brilliant piece
so it was dp
god how could he asked sanskaarto do that??
who is d person?? ap ????

Hey Prachi...🤗

Thanks so much dear. Very happy to know you liked this.

Durga Prasad feels remorse for what he did, but he also wants to desperately maintain his aura, his prestige and his image within his family. He would do anything to ensure his wife and sons don't come to know. ...and selfishly, he is prepared to ask Sanskaar to give up his own share. Its unjust and completely unfair...but Durga Prasad is now so gripped by that self preservation instinct, he has become selfish.

As to who enters the study...I will say what Remus Lupin tells Harry Potter : "Your instincts are good and nearly always right " 😆 😉

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#49

Originally posted by: Kamala05
Brilliant work Viji. I love the characterization most.

Thanks so much Kamala. 🤗 Very glad you liked it.

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#50

Originally posted by: maaneetfan
Yes I do wonder who it could be and fervently hope it's Annapurna who has heard it all and doesn't need to be protected anymore so that they don't need to give in to Ragini and her blackmail anymore!

Tho I don't like over guessing so I'm completely open for a new twist and some fresh dimension that can change the game!!

As Remus Lupin tells Harry Potter, "Your instincts are good and nearly always right ". 😆 😉