SwaSan TS: 'Old Sins Cast Long Shadows' - Page 15

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

Thanks a ton, Nityah. 😊 Will check and reply on that tomorrow. All well with you?

This story was bloody brilliant! The entire twist came out of left field! Make this go under the title of biggest plot twist ever! Although after I read the preface I thought the story was going to go a supernatural route, and I was really hoping so! But the ending was so much better than I would have ever anticipated!

I personally liked that fic started with Sanskaar and Swara already together, and then the drama built off from there. Although I hate the term "friend-zone" as it implies that woman should give every man that likes her a chance because he is being a decent human being misogynistic, I find friend-zone doesn't apply to Sanskaar as he is acting the opposite of every man who has self-proclaimed to be in the "friend-zone". The one person who need to understand the misogynistic nature is Laksh, but then he just turned out the worst of the worst in this story🤢

I find it quite that Sanskaar gave her a pepper spray and a swish knife, and being little too overprotective annoying because it kinda made Swara seem weak, which she definitely is not. But it did come in handy with her face off to Laksh so I can't be upset about it. But I am happy that Sanskaar has closure over Kavita's death. I found that very touching in the story! I feel that Kavita's death might become an arc later on in the actual show.

Anywho! Thanks for this thriller suspense story🤗, and Laksh could even become sociopath-ic given his domineering nature in the show. 😕

Originally posted by: Lavender_Love

me all good yaara just getting busy with house work because of Diwali...
check whenever you got time.. I am right now reading your OS.. 😳

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

He he...you too? I am also into Diwali preparations from today. Being south Indians, we celebrate Diwali on 10th and not 11th. So celebrations would start 9th evening onwards.

You'd told me in one of your earlier comments that you're having exams coming up is it? You were studying as I recall. When are those exams? All the very best for them, dear.

I can't wait to read your comment and reply. Just going to to so after my morning mug of adrak and elaichi chai.😊

Originally posted by: Lavender_Love

unreserving

Viji... 🤗🤗🤗
Firstly I want to apologize for such a late comment...I am slowly replying to every PM... today I was going to reply yours and you sent the scrap too so will start from here. Ok ,, a confession... I have read this the day you posted it..but I was finishing the SwaSan throwback VM that day so thought to comment later Abhi bhi... I had opened this pagetwo hour ago and I finally got time to reply... 😕
Coming to TS itself... Viji ... it shouldn't amaze me anymore watching you create such awesomeness... but you still always do... this piece totally snagged first place for my favorite fic of yours.. I just loved it... The preface ... they way you started with quote about zero hour is amazing... and then how you used the words to paint the scenery ...Its amazing... Its like... I am watching it happening in front of my eyes... You so amazingly created the aura of thriller and suspense just by your words... Just reading the preface had made my heart race with thrill to see what will happen...😳 Part 1... the quotes were so apt. I loved AP here.. I really hope this how she will remain in show too.. a sensible woman. And Sujju... what I can say... sometimes I want to hate her but her antics don't let me.. Coming to SwaSan... can they be more adorable...?? I can so imagine Sanskaar staring his wifey doing pooja and getting lost in her. Can we get such romance in show too... Again you have conveyed every emotion so amazingly through words. Just reading I too can feel... the love, care ,longing the fear to take the final step. I really dont have words to praise you properly but by just reading them... I was transported to into SwaSan's own world.
Part 2... The starting with poetry lines from Sappho itself is so romantic... I read this whole poem after seeing it here for first time... and its so beautiful and romantic...The built up you generated for SwaSan final step was amazing... All I could do was just keep reading filled with awe. You have so beautifully written this part. The last part... I had an idea that it will be Laksh... there were hints you dropped along the way... and My God... I had goose bumps reading Swara and Laksh confrontation. It was so exciting to read it...
All in all... this one of the best work I got to read till the date. You're so amazing with words yaar...When ever you write it creates pure magic. I said before you're one of my favorite author here at IF... but I now say... you are my most favorite author at IF along with Shruti. You both are just amazing.. I wish both of you to see as a published author. You will do great. Your plots, your story telling are so mind capturing that once you start reading... I as reader get lost in it..
Love you..
Nityah... 😳

Originally posted by: .Regal.

This story was bloody brilliant! The entire twist came out of left field! Make this go under the title of biggest plot twist ever! Although after I read the preface I thought the story was going to go a supernatural route, and I was really hoping so! But the ending was so much better than I would have ever anticipated!

I personally liked that fic started with Sanskaar and Swara already together, and then the drama built off from there. Although I hate the term "friend-zone" as it implies that woman should give every man that likes her a chance because he is being a decent human being misogynistic, I find friend-zone doesn't apply to Sanskaar as he is acting the opposite of every man who has self-proclaimed to be in the "friend-zone". The one person who need to understand the misogynistic nature is Laksh, but then he just turned out the worst of the worst in this story🤢

I find it quite that Sanskaar gave her a pepper spray and a swish knife, and being little too overprotective annoying because it kinda made Swara seem weak, which she definitely is not. But it did come in handy with her face off to Laksh so I can't be upset about it. But I am happy that Sanskaar has closure over Kavita's death. I found that very touching in the story! I feel that Kavita's death might become an arc later on in the actual show.

Anywho! Thanks for this thriller suspense story🤗, and Laksh could even become sociopath-ic given his domineering nature in the show. 😕

Originally posted by: piccola1

Viji, I have been wanting to pen this down since the day I first went through your TS, very avidly, and with bated breath !😛 How can I thank you enough, for not keeping us in suspense over the next 2 parts? Love your taking the effort and the time, to do it for our satiety ! God bless.😊

I will start with my Hearty Congratulations, Viji, for a par excellence penmanship of what you've said is a completely new genre for you ! For those who dont know it, you would appear to be a past master ! 👏

I loved the way you started this TS..the 1st para sets the tone immediately and definitively...its ominous, grave and dark. And gets more so, when the sinister shadow appears and hides again. Wow..you have written it so well, I can picture it unravelling...👍🏼 And the meanness, the fury, the frustration and the malintent is so strong, it hit me hard...to the extent that I felt like walking into the scene and sheltering our sunny duo from this evil force.😲

The AP para was a complete red herring, at the start, at least for me😆. I guess I havent got out of your take on this powerful queenly force even now..but you toned her down beautifully. And while she retains her regal aura, she is also all woman, and mother thankfully, to Sanskaar.

The beautiful take on Sanskaar and on Swara.😳..Our Sunny boy is so aptly portrayed...his boundless love for his beloved wife is wonderfully written. He is truly bewitched..and so are we, with him, his quiet, infinite, selfless and oh so endearing love ! And you, my dear, make him even more loveable, with sketches like these ! 😃 The "friend-zoning" that he has done, is superbly etched out..and is so frustrating to us readers, even as we admire him even more for being superhuman in his efforts to retain his iron self control! And those cracks in his defence, as you described them, are completely adorable..! 😳And parallely, you have our Golden girl, still unsure, still confused, and still hurting but healing in his unending love and care. Sensitively and superbly portrayed, Viji!

The 2nd shot was a complete contrast from the inaction of the 1st...the 1st was all thought, the 2nd all Action..! And thankfully, what was most active, for once, was Swara's brain..in that she finally realized what Sanskaar means to her ! The agony that you made her suffer, was worthy of her love...and soo needed for this love story to take the next step. Sanskaar's realization of what her scold really implied, was very welcome. And so typical that he was immediately swamped by concern for her, when he saw her in tears. 😳

Umm, the next bit was most satisfying❤️..my heart craves to see it on screen..and I know we WONT get to see it ! 😕 It was enchanting, ethereal and oh so beautiful, Viji ! And the last line, almost a benediction, gave hope of a long lasting, love.😳😳

And what a return to the the looming darkness, the terror and the sheer evil of the start, again...the sun of our golden duo's love seemed to have been dwarfed out by the evil..vague though it remained. When you said Sanskaar was leaving, one knew, that this was it. And while some friends in this forum did catch on, I didn't, so the denouement when it came, was a complete surprise for me! (I guess I couldn't ever attribute genius to Lakshya...and an evil genius, mad to boot, is what you've made him!) And the extent of his evil, and his insanity was blood curdling..well done Viji..this is a villian far superior than I can ever imagine Lakshya to be.⭐️

Am I glad, that Sanskaar being his smart self and had done all he could to keep her safe ! With pepper sprays, army knives and detectives to boot? Thankfully she was smart enough to create the right opportunity, and to use them ! Hurray! And hurray too, to her final deliverance. 👏

The wrap up, frankly, was unwelcome! I so love to delve into the make believe world you create, I'd like it to go on forever ! So, selfishly, I'd have liked to see further discussions between our love birds, a bit of the shock and pain of Sanskaar and her sharing her shoulder, the revelation to the family and DP/AP's reactions, and a final word from Sanskaar on Kavita too..for closure with Swara..perhaps even what happened with Ragini. And of course lots of more Swasan...(sorry..but ye dil maange more!)😃

I read this and a number of superb stories and posts, right through my fever last week..and they really kept me going, upliftng my mood, giving me positivity and friendship, in the gloom of being ill..I cant be thankful enough to you and to all the other pals here, for making me feel so good. 🤗

Keep em coming, Viji..as soon and as often as you can! 🤗🤗

viji🤗⭐️👏

Originally posted by: suhasini2727

viji🤗⭐️👏

outstanding honey...

standing ovation to u dear...bows down🥳

its nt like an attempt dear its perfection⭐️

i totally completely enjoyed it

wat an awesome writer u r...wonderful job👏

felt as if i am watching a thriller movie

its like i got hooked up while reading... u know i was very eager to complete reading this

few works came in the middle... from work to home then to church...preparations for youth sunday was going on...it irritated me much to stop ur story in the middle...

loved all ur stories...they are absolutely amazing...

this TS "Old Sins Cast Long Shadows". being thriller in addition made a different impact over me...

only ur story is running in my mind

after coming back to home...first thing i did z...opened my lap to read ur story...

and sorry viji ... am i making u feel bored by telling all these

i told all this stuff to tel u...that this was the effect of ur story on me

and how much i loved it

no one can tel that its ur attempt on this different genre...no one... m very sure about it

i am really glad that i read ur story

love u loads...u r gifted with such a mesmerizing talent...stay blessed😊😊😊

thanku very very much once again for ur pm...m glad❤️

...

loved how u explained the monsoon in kolkata...

PART 1 a growing intimacy -

enjoyed wen durga prasad shot down the thought of reuniting swara and laksh...annapura last ray of hope was gone😆

nice to know how annapurna is aware of love between swasan

u penned it down very smoothly yet intensenly annapurnas partialty towards laksh

liked how sanskaar learned how to take pleasure in small things... such a sweet guy he is... selflesss love❤️

he admiring swaras beauty...z out of this world

that para where u explained swara ever had a male presence in her life...it was perfect...

and very much opposite to her experience ... how sanskaar stood as a rock in every circumstance...and the build up of trust and respect z quite visible between them

and loved how gradually swara missed him and realisations of her feelings towards sanskaar

part 2-their intimacy blooms- but amidst a sleepless malice

awww... sanskaar protectiveness towards swara... tooo good

and after sanskaar left her in anger...her concern for him , continously calling him z very sweet

it was completely swasanlicious... very beautiful n mesmerizing

both undergoing through unknown fear...n still comforting eachother that everything vl b fine

sanskaar explaining his relation with lucky to swara z emotional

n giving all precautionary measures to swara... how caring

part 3- zero hour

its like a thriller... m completely surprised

loved confidence and trust of swara on sanskaar and insisted to wait till he comes back

her cold behaviour towards laksh z like

i enjoyed it viji

and how boldly she showed her confidence on sanskaar infront of laksh👏👏

how desperately she wanted to talk to her hubby❤️

laksh how cunning n smart he is🤢😡

he killed kavitha😭😭😭

end of suspence... wen swara realised he is none another than laksh... how smartly she tried to divert him...

followed wat her hubby said

sanskaar kept an eye on everyone to protect swara

how she got rescued

all those aspects are very good

its a master piece viji...great job

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

Suhasini, that was so very, very sweet of you. 🤗 🤗 I was so touched that you had reviewed each individual chapter dear, of this 3-Shot. Thanks, from the bottom of my heart.

As I told you, this mystery/ suspense space was a new genre I was attempting to write, so I am very happy to hear that you found these aspects thrilling! 😊 Of course, the SwaSan romance would be there---I am a die hard fan of this magical pair, and for me, this was intended as a romantic mystery thriller! 😛

As for the last chapter, I had chills going down my spine when I wrote it, dear. Seriously. I was feeling quite scared, even though I was writing it! 😊 So as you can imagine, I felt happy to hear that you also found it very chilling!

Thanks again for your detailed and insightful comment, dear.