SwaSan OS : Outburst

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Smilelicious

@Smilelicious

Dazzler

Posted: 9 years ago

#11

Anna 🤗
You depicted Sanskar's feelings in a sublime way👏 His pain, frustration, everything was described so well.
Why can you not see that the more time we spend together - the more deeply I will fall in love with you? Why don't you see ki tumhare Maa Baba ko milane ke chakkar mein mujhe tumse pyaar hogaya? Why don't you realize ki Lakshya aur Ragini ko ek karte karte - kahin main tumhare pyaar mein itna paagal na ho jaun ki apna maksat poora hote hi - when you leave me and go - I DIE!
Wow. This took my breath away👏
Loved the last part where Swara looks herself in the mirror while holding the manglasutra tightly.
Looking forward to read more stories from you 😳

Edited by Smilelicious - 9 years ago

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Flame.

@Flame.

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#12

Anna!

I think I remember you from IPK forum. Those mad days 😆 😊

Now coming to the OS, It was gorgeous. Sanskar's feelings and thoughts seemed so genuine. I could vividly imagine this scene playing out on my T.V screen. Really very very well written. Very natural to see Sanskar wanting to stay totally away from her because of the pain and hurt that he would have to go through if he has to stay with her or even anywhere near her given the fact that she doesn't reciprocate.

Just so heartbreaking when he told her he can't promise her to stop loving her or fall deeper in love with her.

Ahh, the unsurmountable pain that comes with one sided love beautifully captured by you 👍🏼

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--Anna--

@--Anna--

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 9 years ago

#13

Originally posted by: Sakura24
I'm soo in love with this concept. It's beautiful, touching and awesome to some different level. Enjoyed every bit of it. Really a marvelous OS!!

Thank you so much! Means a lot 🤗

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medha

@ToujoursPur

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#14

Very well written anna,

i felt so sorry for him.

i hope the show actually progresses to this very soon.

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--Anna--

@--Anna--

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 9 years ago

#15

Originally posted by: Annei123
Awesome os 👏
Loved it !!!!
Do write more on swasan 😛

Thank you so much. I am thinking of continuing more on this one. Maybe make this one into an FF 😛

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--Anna--

@--Anna--

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 9 years ago

#16

Originally posted by: suhasini2727
its beautiful anna...u penned the outburst perfectly...👏👏👏
hope same happens in the show

Thank you so much. I would love if this happens in the show. Sanskaar needs a let out. But he will bottle everything in - if I am to believe. 🥱

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--Anna--

@--Anna--

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 9 years ago

#17

Originally posted by: bwvianna
Hey,

I read this fanfiction and just couldn't stop myself from replying/commenting on it. Your writing style is really very good. I loved the way you portrayed Sanskaar's feelings. Truly I was waiting for someone to realize that Sanskaar would want to stay away from Swara after the whole fiasco considering he is practical and has already lost love once. Thank you so much for such genuine writing and for sharing it.

Keep writing. :)

- V

Hey V! :)

Thank you so much. I am glad you came out and commented here. :)

I myself want that Sanskaar need to stay away from Swara for a while. He needs space and so does she to really know what they both want. I do not want Sanskaar to do what she says without putting up a fight on how he is treated.

Would love to see you more active here!

- Anna

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Shweta Gupta

@ll_megha_ll

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#18

After reading this my lips got sealed yaar...

Hey don't get me wrong re...

It's awesome and wonderful os...

It's just that i am speechless...

I don't getting any words to praise you...

You wrote each and everything so beautifully...

Do write more...

And also please pm me...

Edited by ll_megha_ll - 9 years ago

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JazzyM

@JazzyM

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

#19

Well done. An outburst that needed to occur...the wound was becoming a gangrene. If Sanskaar doesn't let go of his feelings, doesn't let it surface, it will most probably kill him or at least make him become a patient of the mental asylum...He acted as mad but with Swara's 'good intentions' she'll most probably turn him mad.

Swara always reminds me of a race horse...to ensure best results, the horse's eyes are covered in a manner where it can only see in front, no disturbance, then it just races...that's how Swara is, to get to her matlab (her ma baba, her behen...) she doesn't care about the others...it's like casualty of war..

I wish the CVs would take a leaf out of your piece and think about it...