Why is it only the woman's duty to understand the man?

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CheshireBilli

@CheshireBilli

Dazzler

+ 7

Posted: 11 years ago

#51

Originally posted by: ttt1

which he will never accept , one moment of kindness , he will go back into his shell because a damage hero gathers more sympathy and trps
so where can understanding ever begin
had he known his issues he wouldnt be damaged in the first place , i dont think he wants any kind of closure , he didnt try to understand his mom all these years nor searched for her , may be she all negative may be she is not
the thing is i think rudra the way he has been portrayed is the weaker one here , so if the marriage has to work someone has to take a step
paro being the one who is clear about her feeling and wants the relationship to work

other choice is rudra who doesnt know how he feels and doesnt want the realtionship to work( after forcing her into marriage)

Ah, but the difference is that he was 13 at that time. His mom leaving him has become this tragedy of epic proportions in his mind. Not to take away from it in any way, he's thought and thought and thought about it and rehashed it and come up with a million different scenarios and explanations that he could not understand and had eventually painted his mother as some sort of beautiful, evil witch. I don't think he's entirely absolved himself of guilt either. He definitely needs closure there too.

Paro, on the other hand, he's known only as an adult. This isn't a story where he is too young to understand what happened or one where he's misunderstanding her because of some gap in communication. He has an absurd blind prejudice. I think he DOES recognize that he is damaged but doesn't want to address it. He's said so on enough counts-- that he cannot love and he has issues that he cannot overcome, etc etc. And it clearly makes him unhappy.

So that is the question Paro leaves him with. Do you care enough to try? I'm with NB in that the last scene re-established a modicum of the original characters. Paro is willing to help him, if he is willing to help himself. It may be out of her misplaced delusions, but that's how it is for her.

Of course, this JTHJ type track might well re-establish his conviction that beautiful women can't be trusted. *facepalm* OR it might actually show Paro that blind faith is not the solution and show Rudra that losing her is not an option. I'm not going to hold my breath though.

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tttttt1

@tttttt1

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#52

declaration - my answer and explanation is under the assumptions the writers of the show donot suffer from short term memory loss and know what they are writing

hey semanti

as far as i see the plot , what i have felt is the delusion is not a by-product , it is a part of characterization of paro

a girl who has been through a lot of hard ships but is tackling the issue the wrong way , like similar to closing eyes to create darkness actually that is a strong statement may be close

i never blamed her for not trusting rudra initially , cos she had no reason to , but i didnot get her falling in love like this that she was willing to take anything that was dished in front of her

the bitterness , the 'bi polar ' behavior , blame of trying to kill his father , trading off her to marry sumer for money

because she is not sad , she is in this eternal faith that it is her pati parmeshwar

a woman in love is very demanding even if it is one sided , here she is not demanding she is accepting , thats is my reason for believing she is delusional and the characterization itself is such

she didnot try to prove her point instead took it because she believed they were are meant to be together , this is delusion to an extend that it is suffocating

the guy clearly is not ready for this , that is leading to suffocation and outburst , because according to him she doesnt know him ... which i think is true

what i mean by tackling the issue is not that she should try and understand him

but she should understand that he is not treating her well , only then she will understand the reason

here never did i see paro do that , that i have an issue with

that suffocation i thought was leading to his outburst ,because she behaves as if she understands him , i have a problem with that , i think that is a delusion too (and it is deliberate )

i an mot justifying him here , like i said he has done pretty awful things no doubt , but she is giving in before anything

as far as rudra is concerned , he cares for her no doubt , as both of us said the simple thing is he doesnt want a closure , and is not ready to move on not so soon

i think the prejudice about beautiful woman is not his issue , but her wiliness and complete surrender and treating him like god is causing the mistrust , because i dont think he thinks very high if himself

muj jaise janwar se kabi shaadi nahin karegi

i think the plot itself is there are drawing a parallel between paro and rudra present and dilsher and mala past

if it was mala's delusion that led her to leave her family , i dont think she is negative , she had her reasons but that broke her son completely

i think they are going to repeat it with paro

now that i have written so much i am thinking of making a post of it , should i semanti will i get bashed ?

Edited by tttttt1 - 11 years ago

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Sultan_Of_Swing

@Sultan_Of_Swing

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 11 years ago

#53

Originally posted by: ttt1

hey shree
how are you ? occasional visitor you have become

real life hota , everybody will be in jail had law and order been in place

apna desi TV loves sacrificial wives

here the issue is paro is more than willing to take it , like the hate marriage , no opint in feeling bad for her when she is more than willing to accept it , may be she has a plan and may be that is determination , she is standing by what she believes

but cvs have to show that properly na , shouldnt come across as he took phere so he is my pati , and pati is shiv and shiv is always right

If you believe Paro doesn't deserve as much sympathy as she has accepted her fate, then Why should we reserve sympathy for Rudra who also willingly married her for whatever reasons?

Rudra has been dealt with a lot, but so has Paro.

Just because one has learnt to embrace it and move on, it doesn't mean their pain is any lesser than someone who still can't make peace with their past.

And as a general question- people are going on and on about how it'd be wrong for Paro to leave. Why? Doesn't Rudra want that too?

Edited by Naach_Basanti - 11 years ago

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tttttt1

@tttttt1

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#54

Originally posted by: Naach_Basanti

If you believe Paro doesn't deserve as much sympathy as she has accepted her fate, then Why should we reserve sympathy for Rudra who also willingly married her for whatever reasons?

Rudra has been dealt with a lot, but so has Paro.

Just because one has learnt to embrace it and move on, it doesn't mean their pain is any lesser than someone who still can't make peace with their past.

And as a general question- people are going on and on about how it'd be wrong for Paro to leave. Why? Doesn't Rudra want that too?

true NB , i am not saying paro doesnt deserve sympathy , i am saying she deserves sympathy for her delusions , she is doing herself more harm than rudra is to her

like i said possibility it is my completely non romantic view that is coming in this

i hate it when the writer characterize woman as though they have to take the BS cos it is her husband , because they are meant to me together , i dont buy it

and this is not enforced by anyone , it is not enforced by rudra , it is paro on her self

does rudra deserve sympathy

no he doesnt

but then the story wont go ahead if both dont deserve sympathy , thats why these writers have occasional sweet scenes to show that he is inherently good it is his bitterness and all that

@bold

that i just wrote a reply to semanti here , i think it a part of the plot

she doesnt know him nor has she tried understanding him , she loves him unconditionally true , but isnt this whole men are from mars women are from venus causing

@ red is my issue

my issue wi cant romanticizing the character of paro , is there are a lot of woman who live like her

compromise with life , start believing that is all rosy , we are meant to be together ,

small instances of kindness they keep it close to heart forgetting the larger faults they have done

it is beautiful to be in love , it is even more beautiful when the love is reciprocated but this compromise i fail to see it as love

as for paro , if she is completely determined that she loved him and will make him fall for her as well , i would like to see that ,just that what they showed till now is not that

PS i am slightly surprised by this response of your's NB , i never mentioned sympathizing with rudra in any post of mine since the beginning of the show or she should not leave rudra😆😆

Edited by tttttt1 - 11 years ago

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jeesie

@jeesie

Navigator

Posted: 11 years ago

#55

Much needed post NB

I wants PARO to leave RUDRA , cuz I think that's the only way , through which he will realize her immense love for him. Hopefully people r saying if PARO love him then why she is leaving him

They have to understand PARO is not leaving him happily , she is a very religious girl she promise to her god that if he grant life to RUDRA in return she will sacrifice her most precious thing to him , and obviously RUDRA is the most precious person in her life that's shy she have to leave him so she can fulfill her promise towards her god

It's very difficult for PARO to leave RUDRA , to leave only relationship in her life , to leave true love of her life but she is doing it cuz she have to fulfill her promise with her god , who in return saved rudra's life

Edited by jeesie - 11 years ago

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Jungli Billi

@MesmerizingSanz

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 11 years ago

#56

loved your post and i hope i get an answer too

Edited by MesmerizingSanz - 11 years ago

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goguma

@goguma

Inactive

+ 3

Posted: 11 years ago

#57

prior to the poisoning incident, he asked freedom from paro, and now she will grant that wish ...

major has HUGE excess baggage that he needs to deal with, and paro can only do this much ...

the ball is in his court ...

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