Why is it only the woman's duty to understand the man?

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Sultan_Of_Swing

@Sultan_Of_Swing

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 11 years ago

I have been saying many posts going on and on about how Paro doesn't understand Rudra.

My question is why is it only her duty to do so? Why does it become only the woman's duty to heal a man with severe mommy issues?

Does he understand her?

Forget understanding her, does he even know anything about her?

She can only understand him, if he lets her in. they have been married for days/week and sometimes people take ages to understand each other.

How about Rudra opens up a little? If thats not possible due to his mommy issues, then Paro should do, what exactly he wants her to do- leave him for good.

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SanzBarbie

@SanzBarbie

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 11 years ago

Gosh this eternal mommy issues and bipolar attitudes are seriously getting on my nerves now !!

Paro's departure will sure teach him some much needed manners !!

Edited by NicklausBarbie - 11 years ago

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Exprimere

@Exprimere

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

Because that itself is the "ideal" premise of the show. And of any daily soap. In fact, this is not the only trope that is perpetuated on screen. The idea that the woman can "change" the man if she is patient, and loves him enough- it bothers me. Paro has been pursuing Rudra with the same thought in her head, from whatever I understand of her. Real life consequences for any woman in such a position might be harmful.

As for why can't he try and see her side of the story, I'm glad Paro at least, pointed this out today. She did tell him that she's had a past but has chosen to move on. If Rudra does pick up this cue, it would be a convincing, subtle and a definite step towards the love story they are trying to explore.

The issue is this: the writers have been so inconsistent with characters, that I dread what they will show vis a vis Rudra understanding Paro. What if they make him flatter her? Follow her around? Woo her? That has the possibility of ruining characters. Patchy waters there.

So while it would be a very sensible step, it has its dangers. I don't trust the writers enough- can they grasp the dynamics well? Nor do I expect them to add intricacy to a female character anymore. They can make Paro look strong and assertive, and Rudra mushy. The middle ground is a challenge.

As for her leaving him? That ONLY has the scope for another MU.

Edited by Exprimere - 11 years ago

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tttttt1

@tttttt1

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

true NB

understanding has to be from both sides , but it has to begin somewhere

it could be rudra or paro or both , i go with both

with paro the issue is i feel she feels she understands how rudra feels...okay that is a lot of feel in one statement

which i think is not correct , one it is too early , neither of them know the other , neither of them are trying to understand the other , she is jumping to conclusions before knowing the question

rudra understanding paro , that will come after he falls for her and is ready to accept ,which is after a year if we are lucky

it is paro who is in love with rudra and who is kinda claiming to know him

Edited by tttttt1 - 11 years ago

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Swetha

@Chaandaniya

Dazzler

+ 4

Posted: 11 years ago

I must say I really loved how Paro give it back to Rudra.

You go girl!

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Hope

@Hope

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 11 years ago

Very well said, Basanti sa. Excellent Post. I really don't understand why people expect women to care, nurture, take taunts and understand to her man. You asked the perfect question, Why Paro? Why not Rudra?👏

It is not just with Paro and Rudra or in other shows or in movies. It happens even in real life. Every where a women is asked to be patient, understand her husband, be his strength. She is even asked to take it quietly when she is abused. WHY?

It is hard for us viewers who saw Rudra in his good and bad times, know more about his past than Paro to understand his actions at times 🤔. Then I don't know how Paro is to understand him when all he does around her is tell her off, remind her that he hates her and doesn't need her in his life. I agree he is caring towards her to at times but that only confuses Paro more . This man keeps repeating that he hates her and out of no where starts to care about her and with in no time changes back to taunting her. Even in today's episode, he kept on taking her name when she was not around him and once she was next to him all he did was ridicule her. 🥺

Paro is taking the brunt of his mommy issues . But she is sticking to him even though he has a baggage only because she loves him. Now if he doesn't let her in then how is it her fault.😕 A man is equally responsible as a women to make a relationship work and here, till now only Paro was contributing to their relationship. She was always trying to understand him, give him love, gain his trust. So, blaming Paro for not understanding her strong headed and rude husband who is not ready to accept her as his wife or as a part of his life is very wrong.😲

Edited by Hope - 11 years ago

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Priyanka

@AmazingAmy

Dazzler

+ 6

Posted: 11 years ago

I couldn't agree more NB, you perfectly stated it...I was amused to see some people blaming Paro for not "understanding" Rudra. If a man is as bipolar and complex as him, how can anyone understand him unless they live inside him and can read his mind. Perhaps only a therapist can understand him.

I feel like Paro tried her best with him...she tried to look past his harsh words and threats and continued to love him and stick with him. Beyond that, what else can she give, he has to give something back too. I'm res'ing this to add more later.

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CheshireBilli

@CheshireBilli

Dazzler

+ 7

Posted: 11 years ago

Because Hindi soaps cannot look beyond tropes that have existed from the times of Savitri. Because we love asking women why they 'gave up' on a bad marriage. Because no matter what, a woman is expected to 'nurture'. Because a harsh childhood is complete leeway to act like an asshole these days.

Incidentally, I'd say that Paro 'understands' Rudra a darn sight better than he 'understands' her. She maybe delusional, but she knows exactly what he's like. He, on the other hand, has no idea and cannot see beyond an absurd prejudice that a rational army officer should be ashamed to hold.

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Erika

@Erika1

Voyager

Posted: 11 years ago

Thanks for this post, he certainly doesn't try to understand her, if he did he would see that her asking for his job is not a way of degrading him or making him look small in the eyes of his superiors.

I think this woman duty to understand man is nonsense, hey we are more intelligent than they are doesn't mean that we should waste our energies on teaching them logic. 😆