Please Someone tell me. - Page 4

Originally posted by: -Shayari-

He doesnt have to frogive him.. he just needs to HEALTHILY and properly come to terms and confront him with how much anger he has for him.. let it all out..not hide in his hatred..

but thank you for responding!

Originally posted by: Rupunzale

Every relationship is important in life but the man who has vowed to stand by me in every step of my life will be my first priority... and that is my husband. It's not because i need him in my life...it's because it was my choice to invite him in my life. It was the choice I made with my dad's blessing. It doesn't mean that my dad is not my priority, it just means that in any given situation I would prioritize my husband and I am sure he would do the same.

Originally posted by: bheegi

Hi Rosh

How are you girl?

I had promised you that I will comment on your post even though I am not making posts on IF

Here is a cut and paste from my FB post today...kinda addresses what you have talked about:

Changing Tides...Epi Dec 5

As Nikhat said today- waqt ke saath log badal jaate hain

This is so true. In real life, people, their tastes, their likes/dislikes and their relationships all change with time.

I am just going to highlight a few changes here..

Dilshaad: A woman with a lot of self-respect, a single mother, a role model for a lot of us has recently been criticized a lot for her decision to move in with Rashid. While I agree that Rashid doesn't deserve a wonderful woman like Dilshaad but for any self respecting woman like Dilshaad it must have taken a lot to make such a big, life changing decision. Yes, she is being humiliated by everyone at the SM. Razia even called her besharam and behayaa. Ordinarily, any woman would have walked out after character was slandered like that. Dilshaad is no ordinary woman. If she could raise two kids single handedly in a male dominated Muslim society, she is also capable of swallowing her pride and self respect for the health and well being of the only man she has ever loved. If tomorrow, Asad was in a similar situation and God forbid, he had been forced into a marriage with the likes of Tanveer, would Zoya have abandoned him when he needed her? I am sure a lot of feminists would oppose that but women like Dilshaad and Zoya can go to any extent for the well being of the man they love. Yes, Dilshaad did break Asad's heart but she knew that at that moment in her life, Rashid needed her more than her son. Dilshaad has not been selfish but took a very difficult decision just for the sake of her love. Why would she want to stay in SM when Shireen and Razia are constantly breathing down her neck? Ishq par zor nahin and even though Rashid is a spineless and self centered man, Dilshaad can't help it if she fell in love with him and still does. It's strength of her character that she has endured Shireen's hatred, Razia's taunts and her son's heartbreak. My only hope is- once Rashid is hale and hearty- she can walk out of SM with her head held high-on her own terms.

Zoya: Yes, Zoya promised to take care of Asad after Dilshaad left. Yes, she let Asad walk away from home. Yes, she realized her folly and followed him to the airport. Yes, she wanted to stop him from leaving and not accompany him to NY.

Why? Because Zoya knows that Asad's happiness lies with his family. Even if he tries to run away from them, he still needs them and wants them in his life. A spouse's job is to help their spouse take a correct decision, not agree with them blindly. Just because Asad wanted to escape from the pain of his separation from his ammi, doesn't mean Zoya should add to his pain by taking him away from Dilshaad. She knows how close he is to his ammi. She also realizes that deep down, Asad has always craved for Rashid's acceptance. Yes, she called him stone hearted but trust me every wife in anger has said nastier things to her hubby. Of course she doesn't mean it. I know I have called my hubby cold hearted many times- but this is the woman in us trying to stir that emotion in our man. Asad's response was also very typical. When slighted by a spouse's words, most men just walk away. In fact, they become colder and more detached after such words. The reality is neither meant what they did or said in anger. Today, Asad was at the doorstep of SM because deep down even he knows he can only be happy with his ammi and family. People who feel Asad and Zoya are not each other's priorities are probably just being too idealistic. What we have seen since the MS episode is very real- that's how real marriages are. We all want romance and happy-shappy-sappy scenes but those don't happen in real life- except on certain occasions. In India, a marriage is an alliance between families not only two individuals. That's why prioritizing family over self interest is a harsh reality in our society. Asad and Zoya are incomplete without each other but as a unit are incomplete without their family. For Zoya, Asad's family is her family and that's why she can't separate herself from them.

Farhan_Nikhat: If I can forget the initial psycho version of Farhan, I kind of like this evolving Farhan-Nikhat love story. The way Nikhat's face lit up when he walked out in the pink shirt was the highlight for me today. Also, it was good to see a confident Nikhat today. I am glad she gave it back to Haseena in a very polite and courteous manner.

HaHu: Still not sure about this pair. I guess till Ayaan's future is uncertain, we will continue to see HaHu scenes. For now, I have no interest in their love story (if there is one)

Originally posted by: Rupunzale

Every relationship is important in life but the man who has vowed to stand by me in every step of my life will be my first priority... and that is my husband. It's not because i need him in my life...it's because it was my choice to invite him in my life. It was the choice I made with my dad's blessing. It doesn't mean that my dad is not my priority, it just means that in any given situation I would prioritize my husband first and I am sure he would do the same. It doesn't make me selfish...it's just the way I see it.

Originally posted by: bheegi

Hi Rosh

How are you girl?

I had promised you that I will comment on your post even though I am not making posts on IF

Here is a cut and paste from my FB post today...kinda addresses what you have talked about:

Changing Tides...Epi Dec 5

As Nikhat said today- waqt ke saath log badal jaate hain

This is so true. In real life, people, their tastes, their likes/dislikes and their relationships all change with time.

I am just going to highlight a few changes here..

Dilshaad: A woman with a lot of self-respect, a single mother, a role model for a lot of us has recently been criticized a lot for her decision to move in with Rashid. While I agree that Rashid doesn't deserve a wonderful woman like Dilshaad but for any self respecting woman like Dilshaad it must have taken a lot to make such a big, life changing decision. Yes, she is being humiliated by everyone at the SM. Razia even called her besharam and behayaa. Ordinarily, any woman would have walked out after character was slandered like that. Dilshaad is no ordinary woman. If she could raise two kids single handedly in a male dominated Muslim society, she is also capable of swallowing her pride and self respect for the health and well being of the only man she has ever loved. If tomorrow, Asad was in a similar situation and God forbid, he had been forced into a marriage with the likes of Tanveer, would Zoya have abandoned him when he needed her? I am sure a lot of feminists would oppose that but women like Dilshaad and Zoya can go to any extent for the well being of the man they love. Yes, Dilshaad did break Asad's heart but she knew that at that moment in her life, Rashid needed her more than her son. Dilshaad has not been selfish but took a very difficult decision just for the sake of her love. Why would she want to stay in SM when Shireen and Razia are constantly breathing down her neck? Ishq par zor nahin and even though Rashid is a spineless and self centered man, Dilshaad can't help it if she fell in love with him and still does. It's strength of her character that she has endured Shireen's hatred, Razia's taunts and her son's heartbreak. My only hope is- once Rashid is hale and hearty- she can walk out of SM with her head held high-on her own terms.

Zoya: Yes, Zoya promised to take care of Asad after Dilshaad left. Yes, she let Asad walk away from home. Yes, she realized her folly and followed him to the airport. Yes, she wanted to stop him from leaving and not accompany him to NY.

Why? Because Zoya knows that Asad's happiness lies with his family. Even if he tries to run away from them, he still needs them and wants them in his life. A spouse's job is to help their spouse take a correct decision, not agree with them blindly. Just because Asad wanted to escape from the pain of his separation from his ammi, doesn't mean Zoya should add to his pain by taking him away from Dilshaad. She knows how close he is to his ammi. She also realizes that deep down, Asad has always craved for Rashid's acceptance. Yes, she called him stone hearted but trust me every wife in anger has said nastier things to her hubby. Of course she doesn't mean it. I know I have called my hubby cold hearted many times- but this is the woman in us trying to stir that emotion in our man. Asad's response was also very typical. When slighted by a spouse's words, most men just walk away. In fact, they become colder and more detached after such words. The reality is neither meant what they did or said in anger. Today, Asad was at the doorstep of SM because deep down even he knows he can only be happy with his ammi and family. People who feel Asad and Zoya are not each other's priorities are probably just being too idealistic. What we have seen since the MS episode is very real- that's how real marriages are. We all want romance and happy-shappy-sappy scenes but those don't happen in real life- except on certain occasions. In India, a marriage is an alliance between families not only two individuals. That's why prioritizing family over self interest is a harsh reality in our society. Asad and Zoya are incomplete without each other but as a unit are incomplete without their family. For Zoya, Asad's family is her family and that's why she can't separate herself from them.

Farhan_Nikhat: If I can forget the initial psycho version of Farhan, I kind of like this evolving Farhan-Nikhat love story. The way Nikhat's face lit up when he walked out in the pink shirt was the highlight for me today. Also, it was good to see a confident Nikhat today. I am glad she gave it back to Haseena in a very polite and courteous manner.

HaHu: Still not sure about this pair. I guess till Ayaan's future is uncertain, we will continue to see HaHu scenes. For now, I have no interest in their love story (if there is one)

Originally posted by: LaVita-E-Bella

Lol Rosh I don't think he hides his hatred at all. Cough gun scene cough. But I definitely think he needs to voice all his pain to him. I'd love to seen a painful scene with angst where Asad tells Rashid how big of a screw up he is, and how much of a hell he made his life. I don't know if you ever watched Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, but there's this part, where she finally confronts her dad about how he bailed on her. It's really good, I recommend watching it. But I'd love to see something like that between the two. I definiltey don't think Rashid is redeemable, at least right now, and feel Asad shouldn't forgive him. Not only because of what he put his family through, but also the fact that a man who can stand there silently while a part of him, literal part of him is being cursed at and insulted, publicly too, he really has no sympathy from my part.