Leela had a valid point - Page 5

Originally posted by: Rein123

P.S.

I am very happy that Anupamaa has finally moved out of the house and truly appreciate her for that, coming to Baa she was completely wrong to barge into the kaarkhaana and create a scene before the entire family and Bapuji or hasmukh was right to tell her off.

However the language he used with her where he was claiming sole ownership over the property and treating Baa like she is a freeloader of some kind, that was wrong. And I can understand why she reacted and ranted before everyone in the harshest manner regarding his economic status and ability.

Yes Vanraj was wrong, he is a chauvinist and what not, but he was always a good son, brother and father. He too has made a lot of sacrifices which are indeed being overlooked while Anupamaa's are being put on a pedestal.

They can go and celebrate Diwali or any festival they want with Anupamaa, but is it right to neglect Vanraj, Baa, Kavya and Leela in this process? Like spending the entire day with her but leaving the Shah house empty? That is also wrong.

agreed on bapuji also being disrespectful towards baa

But, first and foremost baa was the one who started it all. She started disrespecting each and every one presenting there. And this was not the first time. Time and again she has said so many bad things, insulted everyone specially anuj and anupama in the worst way possible. So she kind of deserves same treatment...its called karma.

First baa started it then, yes, I agree that bapuji also got angry and in fit of rage insulted her and her contribution and pointed finger at her but baa could have stopped it there but no...that lady went totally crazy behaved like violent mad person. In her answer what not she said to bapuji which was so demeaning and belittle his hard work. She brought that topic after living her whole life with him when it doesnt even matter. She asked bapuji why he married her when he had no "aukaat" to run a family. If thats the case then why she married bapuji even after being so money minded and knowing bapuji's "aukaat"

and if bapuji, kinjal and others neglected remaining shahs and went to celebrate with anupama then Vanraj also left his wife on her first diwali, his baa and son on the very day of diwali and heights was that he left not because he had some work but because he was pissed off from anuj's confession...hadh hai matlab. divorce de diya anu ko lekin ab bhi use apne control mein rakhna chahta hai...aur bahut bolta rehta hai ki wo kavya se pyar karta hai lekin ye kaisa pyar hai jo apni wife ki khushiya chhodkar apni ex wife ki love life mein jyada interest rakhta hai. Pehle Vanraj ne kavya ke liye anu ko cheat kiya both physically and emotionally aur ab anu ke liye kavya ko emotionally cheat kar raha hai.

Vanraj build his family house and did lots of sacrifices but for that he is not allowed to have extra marital affair, to treat his wife like trash, to treat his one son badly. Sacrifices dont give you liberty to do all the sins in the world and then be remembered only because of your good deeds.

What Vanraj has done, its done by every sole bread earner son of family. But what anupama has done is something which is beyond comprehension. A girl in a arrange marriage suddenly bestowed with responsibilities of household. She left her education, no one let her complete it, she left her dreams, she left her identity, she forgot herself in taking care of Vanraj's family and he insulted her at every chance, treated her like slave, used her physically and emotionally, allowed everyone to insult her, even her children. and when he had extra marital affair he conveniently blamed it all on anuapama, how she didnt use to take care of herself, how she remained uneducated, how he is ashamed of her and wants someone like kavya who is his equal in every sense.....such a piece of shit.

Thats why anupama's sacrifice is given more importance to Vanraj's

Originally posted by: Rein123

@ toshu may be a prick but he completed his education, Pakhi is no short of an achiever herself in school. So yes you can be a prick as long as you fulfill your responsibilities and can take care of yourself at the end of the day. Samar who is not a prick on the other hand is a college drop out who sucks at studies and chose to be a dancer, not that there's anything wrong in that, but the fact that he doesn't value education just makes me wanna raise a brow especially when you have someone ready to sponsor you for it.

i cant believe what you just said here😲

did you really mean that? putting forward your point, disagreeing with popular opinion is a one thing but finding irrational excuses to support your claims is another thing.

If we go by what you have said then Vanraj is the greatest and ideal person. His mistakes doesnt matter. He can have as many affairs as he want, can treat his wife badly, abuse her physically, mentally and emotionally, can do partiality between his children just because he earns well?

Toshu can be a jerk, disrespect his mother, leave his family when they need him and go to give in luxurious house provided by his MIL, insults that very father who had always supported him, insults bapuji, siblings and your favorite, baa and he can get away with it just because he completed his education and found a decent job?

Pakhi can get away with all her so called "teen tantrums", the numerous times when she insulted her own mother, the times when she sided with kavya, her mother's "sautan", the times she was disrespectful towards everyone in family just because she is good in academics?

Samar's efforts wont be counted which he did to make his mother happy, his good deeds, the respect he has for his elders, the guts to stand up for right, the benevolent heart all that can go to hell because he was not interested in studies, he wanted to make career in dance, is it a sin to make career in arts?

please understand what you are saying first. and if this is the parameter on which you judge people then....well...what can I say...I rest my case.

Jeez,people are so confusing here.

Earlier everyone wanted bapuji to take a stand for anupamaa and say something to leela and now when he took a stand, people feel that leela was right. JOKES.

How are people even defending such a vile and bitter lady, is beyond my comprehension levels.

Agreed that leela has done a lot for her family and faced many difficulties in her life because of lack of money. But having money or no money doesn't give anyone the license to insult people and especially your spouse who has been good to you till date.

And relations are not only biological,true relations are formed by heart. And I can also understand Anu's attachment to Bapuji. Her own father is no more, and the kind of treatment she got from her husband and mother-in-law, only babuji would have treated her with some love and respect.

Anu has spent 26 long years, giving all her love and dedication to the shahs, these many years toh she wouldn't have even spent with her own parents. Also, seeing from the family and background she comes from, where she was taught ki beti ki Arthi uske sasural se hi uthne chahiye mentality, it's obvious she will keep her in-laws at a higher tangent than her own parents.

See,many to have not so good marriages, and leela would have had to curb a lot of her desires and face many difficulties, hence the frustration. But then on the other side, woman also choose to stay in a marriage for their own reasons, be it for the kids, financial dependency, lack of family support or not wanting to face shame from the so called society, so either one should have the courage like anupamaa to leave the marriage or if you don't and one chooses to stay in the marriage, they should have the basic decency atleast to not insult their husband in front of everyone.

So,I don't find that leela's act today can be justified in any scenario.

Are we not forgetting that bapuji asked leela to leave the factory because she barged in and started character assasinating anupama and anuj. That too after he first calmly told her to not spoil everybody's mood. She didn't listen and he also did say that I speak now not as your husband but as anupama's father who was forced to use strong language to protect his daughter. Is that wrong? Have you not seen how baa has been abusing anupama in the past epis because she has dared to live her life and not just spend it in baa's seva? So baa can count all the sacrifice she has done for her family.. Which is what every housewife does, but why doesn't she acknowledge and appreciate the similar sacrifices done by anupama? We understand the frustrations and deficiencies she must have faced due to scant finances but consider that if she was married into a low income family like bapuji's she also would have come from similar background and that was the kind of life she would have known. So why is she behaving like she is some princess sold into slavery?

So vanraj has helped out his family and been his dad's support. Good. It is what good children should do.. Its not such an uncommon virtue that it has to be celebrated and compared to the father's effort and praised as being of higher value than the father's. Vanraj did not come into the world as a 14 year old and immediately start earning. The foundation was laid by bapuji over which vanraj built up. If bapuji was such a useless father how did he even build the 1BHK house that vanraj later expanded.

So money is important. It is most needed to live a happy life. Because nobody can really be happy when they are starving. But does it give those who are responsible for your keep, parents or partners, the right to insult and abuse because they feed? So according to this point of view, because vanraj provided all anupama's material needs, spacious house, good food.,clothes and jewellery even, he is a good husband? Anupama has no business objecting to his lack in the other departments?

How is bapuji differentiating between kids? He is not putting anupama on a pedestal and ignoring his son. Inspite of vanraj's criminal behaviour he still behaves well with him. Should bapuji consider his son's wickedness as non-existent because he started earning early and contributed to the family income?He is only more concerned about anupama now because she has suffered at the hands of his son and now needs all the support she can get to get her life back together. Anuj has only recently come into her life. After the EMA comes to light bapuji was that support system along with samar and devika. His indifference towards his wife is justified because of the immoral way she has been behaving despite his repeated requests and warnings.

Originally posted by: Rein123

I am putting more importance on it because it is more important, whether they are pricks or not atleast they didn't die hungry and have decent life. Toshu may be a prick but he completed his education, Pakhi is no short of an achiever herself in school. So yes you can be a prick as long as you fulfill your responsibilities and can take care of yourself at the end of the day. Samar who is not a prick on the other hand is a college drop out who sucks at studies and chose to be a dancer, not that there's anything wrong in that, but the fact that he doesn't value education just makes me wanna raise a brow especially when you have someone ready to sponsor you for it.

Still Toshu has not earned anything in life by his own efforts. He is essentially a failure like his father. His job and penthouse was a way Rakhi could control him and through him Kinjal. His education was completely funded by Vanraj.

While Samar is touching new heights every day. Samar did not drop of college because he did not want to complete education. But because he hated and hates his father for what he did to his mother and hence does not want to depend on him for anything.

Regarding Pakki it's yet to be seen

Anupama was not baa's choice for bahu but she has no qualms about basking in anu's seva while just sitting on her jhoola all day and gossiping and taunting anu also at the same time.

Why did bapuji go to anupama 's house when he knows that it irritates his wife? Why should bapuji care what baa wants when she doesn't give a shit for what he wants?

Bapuji opts to go to anupama's house because no self respecting person would go back to the house which he has been told he has no place in except as his wife's puppet.. No, not even to mend matters with said wife. And he didn't go to dolly's place bcz she didn't make the offer. Agar anu bhi nahin bulati toh he would've survived on the steps of some mandir.

It's Anupama's kids and her Bahus who will obviously prefer their mother over dadi and step mom.

In case of samar it's his mother first preference always.

In case of pakhi she said her father is not here so she should celebrate with her mother at least.

In case of Nandini and kinjal they consider Anuapama as their mother

In case of babuji anupama has served him for 26yrs and even daughters r married off till 24-25yrs. So their is a deep bond between them.

And babuji was angry on vanraj and baa for mistreating Anupama who is his daughter. So these ppl did not gave time to him heal and adjust with new changes.

Ba just wants Anupama's family at her command. In this teenage kids forget parents and baa expects like toshu and baa expects samar, pakhi, kinjal and Nandini to prefer baa and follow her orders 🤣

@Bechain_bulbul Thank you for your beautifully put points on the comparitive importance of morality vs. education.

So according to the POV expressed by @Rein 123 rich people can exploit the poor, factory owners and company managers can ill treat their employees and labourers, and administrators and people in authority and governance do not have to follow any moral code with regards to those who are under them. Very nice.. Looks like Satan's utopia.

Originally posted by: Bechain_Bulbul

the thing that irked me the most was when anu was giving all mahaan bhashan about beti being their for her father, she was saying all of it in front of dolly and yet she conveniently chose to leave her own father with anupama.

I was like...what the hell! is ghar mein sab anupama ke bharose kyu hain? Dolly sympathize kar sakti hai apne bapuji ke sath lekin unko apne ghar lekar nahi ja sakti....agar aisa hai to bahut hi nalayak beti hai wo.

Dolly is now officially qualified to jump in one spoonful of water 😂

Originally posted by: Bechain_Bulbul

i cant believe what you just said here😲

did you really mean that? putting forward your point, disagreeing with popular opinion is a one thing but finding irrational excuses to support your claims is another thing.

If we go by what you have said then Vanraj is the greatest and ideal person. His mistakes doesnt matter. He can have as many affairs as he want, can treat his wife badly, abuse her physically, mentally and emotionally, can do partiality between his children just because he earns well?

Toshu can be a jerk, disrespect his mother, leave his family when they need him and go to give in luxurious house provided by his MIL, insults that very father who had always supported him, insults bapuji, siblings and your favorite, baa and he can get away with it just because he completed his education and found a decent job?

Pakhi can get away with all her so called "teen tantrums", the numerous times when she insulted her own mother, the times when she sided with kavya, her mother's "sautan", the times she was disrespectful towards everyone in family just because she is good in academics?

Samar's efforts wont be counted which he did to make his mother happy, his good deeds, the respect he has for his elders, the guts to stand up for right, the benevolent heart all that can go to hell because he was not interested in studies, he wanted to make career in dance, is it a sin to make career in arts?

please understand what you are saying first. and if this is the parameter on which you judge people then....well...what can I say...I rest my case.

Dear,

You misunderstood what Rein123 was trying to tell you..

If you have to choose between two sets of people..

1. One, Who gives Gynan ka moti 24*7, Doesn’t involve himself in any argument, who doesn’t take any stand to improve and correct the situation, who sits and orders food and other services at his feet.. who doesn’t put his efforts to make money even when he is hail and healthy and passes all his burdens to their kids.. Inshort Nikkamma ki tarah koi ho.. who absolutely did nothing for the betterment of family..

2. And the other Who worked hard to earn money to attend the house needs and also to pay the fee of his sister and himself.. improved the financial condition of the family by working day and night and still respects his parents without complaining.. Got himself married to girl who is not of his choice by obeying his parents and also got his sister married ..

Whom do you respect?

Forget about how Vanraj treated Anupama for a moment and think.. He sacrificed his life more than Anupama for the family..

Yes, he committed sin .. He has fallen in love when he found a women of his choice after marriage.. Here the mistake is, keeping Anupama in dark.. He should have told her long back and file a divorce which he didn’t..

- He shouldn’t have let all of his frustrations on Anupama and make her life miserable.. I partly blame Anupama too for this.. she allowed him to do that ..

He did regretted his bad behaviour towards Anupama now and then.. But Hasmukh never once regretted for not being useful...

Bhashan se, Gynan ki moti baant ne se , ghar par income Nahi aati hai.. unless you have a college crush who is a billionaire and approves all your shit ideas to keep in touch..

Being successful doesn’t give a right to insult others but they are definitely better than useless people who just sits, eats and do pravachan..

Everyone in the forum including ME and Rein agrees Vanraj is a Chauvinist BUT at the same time nobody wishes to have a Useless husband like Hasmukh too..

One who steps back to take responsibilities have no right to have Kids and also such people doesn’t qualify to give lectures to others on how to behave and live..