Alia Bhatt's New Bridal Wear Ad Sparks Controversy - Page 8

Originally posted by: --Pro.vo.King--

This is a beautiful sentiment- one that I respect wholeheartedly.

However , this is exactly the kind of "majboori" that allows regressive traditions to continue unquestioned. If not for people like us who are relatively in a comfortable position , who will dare challenge societal norms ?

Kanyadaan , strictly speaking in a traditional sense was meant to inculcate a mentality of "precious daughters" and importance of a "female child" in a man's dharma and karma .. This is especially relevant in North India where female foeticide is rampant and daughters are treated as burdens .. Unfortunately, a sentiment which was thoroughly positive at its inception is no longer relevant and quite redundant in modern times .. these sentiments need to evolve with changing times .. they need to change for better .. and I think Hinduism is a religion which stands a chance to adapt to changing times .. we are relatively liberal- always have been , especially if you compare with some of the more rigid , regressive and "set in their ways" Abrahamic religions ..

People tend to understand it only in terms of the negative aspects that benefits them in other ways. They will avoid things that gives them dissonance. Many shastras were written and edited at a later date so I believe they should be avoided. If one understands spirituality and any Indian religion at all. They would all be peace loving and forgiving..

As per Hindusim itself.. it's not good to have only sons in the family. Girl children are seen as a sign of prosperity and wealth. Like Goddess Lakshmi. That is why when she walks out of her home, she throws rice and the mother has to catch it in her jholi so that the girl doesn't take away her prosperity with her. Dharm is from women, as they bring their values and wisdom to another house.

So why are they seen as a burden then?

In Vedic astrology too, Venus (Shukracharya) is a planet of fine arts, creativity, money, luxury, relationships, love,marriage, female friends/ women, wife in a man's chart. Treat women properly and you will get benefits from this planet. Whenever women are ill treated - the prosperity and material wealth karma is affected..

@blue-ice - do you know SRK is a prime example of a well placed Venus (in 5th house - house of romance, creativity, children, fine arts) while the lord of 5th house is in 11th house of income and gains.. In a way astrologers say success is going to how he treats women.. which is very evident..

This is so much a part of Bengal since a few years now.

Many of my cousins didn't have neither will I be having a Kanyadaan (sampradaan). Only my father seems to understand this ideology and encourages it.

I'm neither my parents' nor my husband's. I'm mine to be

Thankfully with the emergence of preistesses in weddings, slowly they are taking out all the problematic bits during the marriage ritual. Hope there are more such priestesses who can continue solomnizing weddings without problematic rituals like kanyadaan.

https://thelogicalindian.com/amp/story-feed/awareness/first-woman-priest-performs-marriage-without-kanyadaan-2/

Originally posted by: Thatgirl16

This is so much a part of Bengal since a few years now.

Many of my cousins didn't have neither will I be having a Kanyadaan (sampradaan). Only my father seems to understand this ideology and encourages it.

I'm neither my parents' nor my husband's. I'm mine to be

By that logic, why have rakhi, bhai dooj (bhai fonta for us) etc.? These are all so patriarchal? Even worshipping of Goddesses and calling them 'mother' is also patriarchal.

I feel its an unnecessary debate--it's not like kanyadan will actually have an impact on your married life. It's symbolic FFS.

"Daan" is probably a wrong term to be associated with this ritual, but giving away the bride is common in many other religions.

People are angry, the answer is very simple. they find their traditions being targeted time and again. Does anyone see Advertisements based on TripleTalaq? Obviously, Hinduism can't be the only religion having outdated traditions? If the media has taken it on them to bring focus on dated regressive traditions, many other communities have these traditions which fall in the same category. There should be uniformity in addressing these issues across society and communities.

And to the other argument, that India is 80% Hindus, absolutely correct. But 20% is still a huge population given the total numbers, it's almost like a country within a country.

Earlier this week, Cadburys came out with a beautiful advertisement saluting our girls. This is the right kind of " WOKE" we need.

Media needs to be FAIR

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Originally posted by: CherryMe

@bold...that argument is absolutely meaningless in the context of patriarchy and womens rights. It's basically used if the purpose is to target one perticular religion or to sheild their own from any criticism.

Yes, 20% in 1.4 billion is a country within a country itself which is why the that argument is avsolutely flawed and meaningless.

I wasn't discussing Patriarchy here nor was I shielding any religion.

Originally posted by: MommaDarling

Thankfully with the emergence of preistesses in weddings, slowly they are taking out all the problematic bits during the marriage ritual. Hope there are more such priestesses who can continue solomnizing weddings without problematic rituals like kanyadaan.

https://thelogicalindian.com/amp/story-feed/awareness/first-woman-priest-performs-marriage-without-kanyadaan-2/

Hindus change with times, maybe slowly but they do adapt and accept new things. This is common in Maharashtra and Pune. And also here in the USA. We have had Hindu women priestesses who conduct Poojas and weddings.

Originally posted by: Mahisa_22

By that logic, why have rakhi, bhai dooj (bhai fonta for us) etc.? These are all so patriarchal? Even worshipping of Goddesses and calling them 'mother' is also patriarchal.

I feel its an unnecessary debate--it's not like kanyadan will actually have an impact on your married life. It's symbolic FFS.

We do have a rakhi where we tie the dhaga to the elder ones. Even my cousins tie it to me. No when we worship Goddess we don't say she isn't ours.

Ladki ka toh ghar hi alag hoti hai... How? She wasn't born to you? We've always fought this thought. No I'm not dhan paraya or apna. I'm a human

Originally posted by: Thatgirl16

We do have a rakhi where we tie the dhaga to the elder ones. Even my cousins tie it to me. No when we worship Goddess we don't say she isn't ours.

Ladki ka toh ghar hi alag hoti hai... How? She wasn't born to you? We've always fought this thought. No I'm not dhan paraya or apna. I'm a human

Rakhi is patriarchal in the sense that it is supposed to be for the brothers' well-being. Same with Bhai fonta. Now the question is, why do only brothers' lives matter? Why not a rakhi for girls as well?

And 'ladki paraya dhan' is not present in this era anymore. We're not living in the 1980s.

"We would call him jenani"

Then the problem lies with us. Not every man is strongly built and not every woman is delicate.